Merlin stared at the boat until it had vanished into the mist of Avalon. Tears streamed down his face, and he couldn't prevent himself from sobbing and trembling. It was as if his heart had been ripped out of his chest.

Everything that had kept him alive was gone. He sank to the ground, curled himself up into a tight ball. Where should he go?

Without him there was no place he could call home. What should he do? He had lost everything. His king, his friend, his destiny. The only person he had trusted with his life. The only person, who had made him whole, who had given his life a meaning.

Had he failed? He hadn't protected him. He hadn't saved him. He had let him slip through his fingers like dry sand. And there had been nothing he could have done.

Maybe he hadn't tried hard enough. He hadn't even tried to heal him. What if his powers had been strong enough?

Why hadn't he killed Mordred first?

Why hadn't he summoned the dragon earlier?

Had he really decided what to do? Or was it meant to be this way?

At least, Arthur knew now. The pressure of keeping his secret was gone, too. Arthur knew, and he hadn't abandoned him, he hadn't pushed him away.

"Just hold me."

His voice buzzed through his head like a faint echo.

"I want you to always be you."

But who was he? He was nothing without him. Magic was still banned from Camelot, and why should he use it anyway? The pain of having lost him became unbearable.

Merlin sat up, dazed and still shivering too much.

He screamed. He screamed like a wild animal that had been mortally wounded. The trees bent to the ground. The earth shook. Rocks were catapulted through the air, smashing into the bursting trees. Fire rained down on him, singeing his clothes. Then he collapsed on the ground, and lost consciousness.

xxxx

The citizens of Camelot had gathered in the throne room. Sir Percival slowly proceeded through the alley to the queen. Gwen was sitting on her throne, and stiffened anxiously, as she saw the stony-faced expression on the knight's face.

"My Lady," Percival hesitatingly began, "I didn't find a sign of the king."

Gwen lowered her head to compose herself, before she looked at Percival: "There's no hope any more?"

Percival shook his head. "The king is dead, my Lady."

Trying to sound calm, she asked: "What shall we do now?"

"The king has left you the royal seal. You know what to do," Percival said sighing. He was tired. Too many had died on this day. Nobody even knew that Gwaine had been murdered by Morgana.

A tear ran down Gwen's cheek. "I need time to think about everything. Leave me alone. Just leave me alone."

The knights bowed to her, and left the throne room.

When Gwen finally was alone, she began to sob. She slid down the throne, ripped the crown off her head and threw it away. Too weak to get up, she stayed there. Tears were falling freely from her lashes now.

xxxx

Merlin was sitting at the shore of the lake, staring into the rippling water. He didn't know how much time had passed. He just didn't care. A cold emptiness had wrapped itself around his heart, squeezing it painfully.

What was he supposed to do now? Where should he go? No, he couldn't leave Avalon. Not as long as there was still hope.

"Arthur will rise again, when Albion is in great need," Kilgharrah had told him.

Merlin sighed. It was his destiny to never leave Arthur's side. He would wait here. Even if it took forever.

He thought about the last days, he had spent with Arthur. Time had flown by so fast. He remembered all the pain, and the fear. He remembered nearly breaking down from all the pressure. He remembered how much Arthur had trusted him.

And now, he was gone. Merlin missed him so much. Now, that he didn't have to lie to him anymore. Now, that there was no need to pretend anything anymore. They could have become best friends.

He lied back in the soft grass, and looked into the sky. The sun had nearly set, the last golden and red sun rays illuminated the horizon. Tomorrow would be a new day. A new day full of hope and anticipation.

xxxx

Gaius was clearing up his remedies and tinctures – like he had done so often during the last weeks. It distracted him from thinking of Arthur, Camelot, Gwen and Merlin.

He didn't know, if Merlin was all right. Percival hadn't talked much about his meeting with him, and Gaius felt guilty, because he had let Merlin down.

Suddenly, he hesitated. Hastily, he checked his shelf.

The poison was missing. Someone had taken the Aconite. Shocked, Gaius sank back against his bench. He had to inform the Queen.

Hastily, he walked to the royal chambers. After he had knocked, he opened the door. "My Lady, I need to tell you something. I discovered that the bottle of Aconite is missing, and..."

Gaius fell silent. Gwen was lying on the floor, her skin unnaturally pale.

"My Lady?" Gaius sank to his knees next to her rigid body.

His fingers trembled, as he felt for a pulse. There was none.

Horrified, he looked around. The empty bottle of Aconite laid in her palm. Next to her was Arthur's crown.

"Guards," he shouted hoarsely, stumbling to his feet. A short time later, two guards stormed into the room.

"The queen..." he stammered. "The queen is dead."

Gaius took the royal seal Gwen had been wearing, and put it away safely.

When the guards lifted the queen from the floor, and carefully laid her on the bed, the warning bell sounded.

Alerted by the bell, Leon, Percival and some other knights rushed into the chambers.

Stunned, they stared at the dead queen. Nobody dared to talk. Finally, Sir Leon turned to Gaius: "What are we supposed to do now?"

Gaius covered the dead body with a blanket. "I don't know," he replied helplessly.

The knights remained silent, as Camelot's citizens gathered outside the castle, and lighted the candles to commemorate their fallen queen.

xxxx

Merlin woke up, and sat up feeling dizzy and nauseous. Something was different. He blinked, and looked at the lake, but it hadn't changed at all.

Suddenly, a terrible pain shot through his head, and he felt for his forehead, kneading the skin.

"Merlin..." he heard a familiar voice.

"Freya, is that you?" he asked bewildered. His heart beat faster.

"Merlin, I don't have much time."

"Is this about Arthur?" Merlin wanted to know, hastily scrambling to his feet.

"You need to be prepared. Something big is about to happen."

"What do you mean by that, Freya?" Merlin asked, cautiously looking around.

"Camelot is in danger. You will be needed very soon." Freya's voice became more and more distant.

"Freya, will Arthur come back? Freya!" Merlin shouted, but he didn't receive an answer.

The atmosphere around him changed. He could sense ancient and powerful magic. It prickled on his skin. "Something big is about to happen..." he whispered.

xxxx

Camelot had changed beyond recognition. The market stands had been knocked down and plundered. Houses were on fire. Thick billows of smoke rose into the sky. The dead body of an old man swung from the gallows.

Leon was standing at the window, staring at the chaos with a shake of his head. If the outbreaks of violence continued, Camelot would lay in ashes within a few days. And he could do nothing to prevent it. Percival stepped up to him. "We need to do something, Leon. Arthur surely wouldn't want this...We need to find a new king."

"How should we find a suitable king, who will be accepted by the nobles and the subjects? What have we done wrong? Why did we lose our king and queen within such a short time?" Leon replied bitterly.

"In the end, Morgana and Mordred did win, and rushed Camelot headlong into disaster," Percival interposed, and clenched his fists.

Leon slammed his hands on the sill. "No! We mustn't allow that. We need help."

"But Leon, who can help us? The old sorcerer? No, Camelot is lost." Percival sighed sadly.

xxxx

Merlin didn't dare to look away from the lake's surface. A fine mist rose from the small island, and hung heavily over the lake. The air became colder. The birds stopped chirping. No breath of wind breezed through the trees.

It was deathly quiet.

He didn't know how many hours he had remained in this position. The fog became thicker, made him tired and drowsy. Merlin could barely keep his eyes open. He was combating fatigue. Freya had told him to be on guard. But he hadn't slept since days, and he was so weak and exhausted.

Surely, it wouldn't do any harm, if he slept a few hours. When the right moment came, he would be ready.

Merlin sank back on the grass, and rolled himself up into a tight ball. A short time later, he slept soundly.

xxxx

Suddenly, he was kicked in the side. "I can't believe he is actually sleeping! Merlin! Merlin, wake up already!"

Moaning, his eyelids fluttered open. The sun was blinding him so much, he couldn't see anything. "What...what's happening?" he mumbled.

Blinking, he recognized the face that was hovering over him. Arthur.

He seemed to glow brightly. Confused, he rubbed at his eyes. "I'm dreaming..."

"Merlin, what's wrong with you? Move your lazy backside! Haven't you told me that you only played dumb?" Arthur said, feigning anger.

Merlin smiled sadly. "That's a really weird dream," he thought out aloud, and finally sat up.

Arthur crossed his arms in front of his chest.

"You are not dreaming, Merlin. We hoped, you could tell us, what happened." Arthur put out his hand to help him up. When Merlin grasped his hand, a warm tingling rushed through his body. Surprised, he looked at his fingers, then back to Arthur. "You are alive?" he said, his voice no more than a faint whisper.

"Yes," Arthur said solemnly. Then he started to grin, and pulled Merlin into a tight hug. "You look awful, but it is good to see you again."

Merlin sagged in his arms. Tears welled up in his eyes. "I thought I've lost you."

Then he saw the three other knights standing behind Arthur.

Slowly, he let go off the king. "Lancelot, it's good to see you," he said in a tearful voice. "Hello, Elyan. But Gwaine...what are you doing here?"

"You surely want to tell me that you missed me, too," Gwaine joked. "I'm here because of our charming Morgana."

Merlin clumsily wiped away the tears, and hugged Lancelot, Gwaine and Elyan. "I'm sorry. I should have stopped her."

"Merlin, you have stopped her. Don't blame yourself," Arthur interrupted him. "You've done more for Camelot than anybody else. But now tell us, what has happened. Why are we here?"

Merlin looked at Arthur. "I don't know. I've been here since...since the day you died. Something must be very wrong."

"Gwen..." Arthur suddenly became very pale. "We need to get back to Camelot. Merlin, can you somehow...you know..."

"What could Merlin possibly do? " Gwaine piped up, and slapped Merlin on the back.

Merlin winced, and glanced at Arthur. "I don't think I can help."

"I see," Arthur quickly said. "We need go get going. The last time it took us more than two days, and we had horses."

Gwaine sighed. "It is so good to breathe fresh air, and feel the warm sun on my skin."

Lancelot smiled, and turned to Merlin, whispering to him: "You have told Arthur everything?"

"Yes," Merlin nodded, "in an exceptional situation. I don't really know, what he thinks about it...everything happened so fast. We barely had any time left."

"Arthur needs you, Merlin. Maybe he hasn't fully grasped what you have done for him, but he will. I know it," Lancelot said, and looked to Arthur, who had taken a few steps forward, and was looking around.

"Come on! We have already wasted enough time," Arthur called out to them.

The knights followed Arthur, who was climbing a rise. Merlin stayed back, and watched them. Arthur had returned.

The time for waiting was over.

He took a deep breath. It felt, as if he had been freed from a huge burden. Tears fell from his lashes, and he hastily blinked them away, when Arthur turned around, eyeing him questioningly.

A smile crept over his lips, as he hastened to catch up with Arthur. "I haven't planned on staying here. For the longest time, I have sat around waiting for you."

"Have you been here all these months?" Arthur wanted to know. He sounded surprised.

"What should I have done?" Merlin quietly replied.

They had reached the forest, now. Arthur felt for his sword. The golden blade sparkled in the sun that shone through the leaves of the old trees.

"You could have gone back to Camelot, and become happy. You couldn't have known that I would be back that soon."

"I would have never been happy in Camelot. Not without you. It is my destiny to be there for you, to serve you, Arthur," Merlin said, and bit his lower lip.

Sheepishly, Arthur patted his shoulder. "Thank you, Merlin. You are a real friend, and I can always rely on you."

"So you don't mind me being a sorcerer?" Merlin asked, and he felt his heart beating painfully in his chest.

The look in Arthur's eyes was serious, as he turned to Merlin. "We will talk about that later. For now I am thankful that you are here."

Merlin lowered his head, and awkwardly stared at the forest floor. Arthur had told him not to change. Had he only done this, because he had known he was about to die?

"What was Avalon like?" he asked instead.

"As if I was in a dream. So unreal, and peaceful. There had been days, on which I haven't even thought of Camelot or this world. Don't you know why I am here?" Arthur's voice was bitter, as if he already missed being in Avalon.

Merlin sighed. "I was told that you will be needed, once Camelot is in grave danger. Arthur, I think that Gwen...that something has happened to her. If she still was queen..." Merlin fell silent. There was a look of despair in his eyes.

Arthur's eyes widened in horror. "Gwen! Do you think she has been kidnapped...or...or even..." He didn't dare to finish the sentence.

"I don't know, Arthur. But we need to fear the worst. Otherwise, the prophecy wouldn't have come true."

Merlin came to an abrupt halt. "Bandits," he whispered. "Not half a mile from here."

"How can you...oh...I understand." Arthur's eyes darkened. He beckoned the others to keep quiet, and drew his sword. Gwaine stood right beside Arthur. "What is wrong?" he asked quietly.

"Bandits. Not far from here. Mer...I heard them. We have to surprise them. That's our only chance," Arthur mumbled.

The knights spread out, and sneaked silently through the undergrowth. Soon, Elyan discovered their camp. More than a dozen men had gathered around a bonfire. Suddenly, a branch snapped, and Elyan spun round, raising his sword. He looked at the grim face that belonged to one of the bandits. As the bandit spotted the crest on his red cloak, he laughed. "What does a knight of Camelot do here? Shouldn't you defend your castle?"

Elyan ran him through without hesitating. "That's what I'm doing."

"Ah...that's where you're wrong," he panted, before he sank to the ground, and died.

At this moment, Arthur, Lancelot and Gwaine stormed the camp. Merlin hid behind a tree, keeping his eyes glued to Arthur and the others. As one of the robbers tried to attack Arthur from behind, Merlin's eyes glowed golden, and a branch collided whit his head. Before he could hit the floor, he lost consciousness.

Arthur turned around, and looked at him. Merlin didn't know, if he was thankful or annoyed for his intervention. Another bandit swung a club at him. Arthur ducked, and threw himself at him, wrestling him to the ground. Lancelot rushed to his help, and hit the outlaw on the arm. Surprised, he let go off the club,

Gwaine was fighting two of them at once. The knights moved fast and skilfully. As one of the bandits lunged at Elyan, who was lying on the ground, Merlin caused him to stumble. He crashed into a tree.

The knights succeeded in overpowering the robber band. Some of them managed to flee into the woods.

They left behind their stolen goods, and the horses. The knights sheathed their swords, and gathered around the bonfire. Except for Gwaine, who had a small cut on his upper arm, they were all unharmed. Merlin left his hideout, and walked up to them. "Are you all right?" Lancelot asked him.

"Yes," Merlin replied, glancing worriedly at Arthur.

He ignored his servant, and said: "Elyan and Lancelot, you go and saddle the horses. Gwaine, search the bandits. Maybe they have left anything useful behind."

"What about me?" Merlin asked, and took one step forward.

"You stay with me. You've done that before, too, haven't you?" Arthur wanted to know, wiping his sweaty forehead.

"Yes, Arthur. I'm always trying to help you my way. I thought, you had..."

Arthur spun round, and roughly grabbed Merlin's arm. "I was dying, Merlin. I couldn't think clearly. It's difficult for me to believe that you are a...one of the most powerful sorcerers."

"But I...I thought I should always be me. I don't want to hide anymore." Merlin was close to tears.

Arthur loosened his grip, and gently pushed Merlin away. "I want you to always be you. Loyal, trusty, brave, helpful, and cheeky." Arthur sighed. "But your magic...should be kept secret until the time is ripe."

Merlin sniffed. "But what does that mean? Do you forbid me to use magic?"

Arthur pondered that. He remembered Merlin doing everything to save his life. He thought of Merlin, who had waited for him, without either eating or sleeping much. And he thought of Merlin, who was always there for him, no matter how dangerous it was. "No, Merlin," he finally said. "I can't prohibit you from using magic. But you have to be careful. I don't know what awaits us in Camelot, and I...I need you by my side."

"Thank you, Sire," Merlin replied, wiping his nose on his sleeve.

Arthur felt sorry for treating Merlin that bad. He seemed to be overextended with the whole situation.

He had realized that he wasn't on the island anymore, when the cold water had jerked him back to life. His heart had started to beat painfully against his ribs. His lungs had sucked in air, and water, and he had choked on it. And then he had discovered Merlin on the lake shore.

He had never been so happy to see him.

Then he had remembered everything.

The battle, in which dozens of people had died or had been hurt
Mordred, who had wounded him. Merlin, who was a powerful wizard, and was capable of killing a strong army. Gwen, whom he hadn't even said goodbye.

He had been in mortal fear. He had suffered excruciating pain.

Then they had been at peace.

Merlin had held him, until he had only felt his clammy fingers stroking his cheek.

And he had slipped into the welcoming darkness.

"Arthur?" Merlin's voice sounded distant and muffled. "The horses are saddled. We should hurry up."

Arthur flinched violently, and hastily blinked. Merlin was standing right in front of him, eyeing him worriedly.

"Thank you, Merlin," he said.

xxxx

They rode in silence towards Camelot. After they had left the forest, they could see black smoke curling into the sky. A few hours later, they reached a little village, and discovered the cause of the thick smoke.

The village had been burnt down. Most of the houses and barns had been destroyed completely. The stench was disgusting. Quickly, Merlin pulled up his neckerchief. He could feel bile rising in his throat.

"Quick! Look for any survivors!" Arthur ordered, jumped off his horse, and ran towards the first smouldering house. Merlin tethered the horses to an intact fence, and stumbled over the remains of a handcart. Losing his balance, he fell to his knees, scraping them on the rough ground. As he lifted his head, he looked at the dead body of a young man. Blank eyes stared at him. Hastily, he bit his tongue to prevent himself from screaming. Then he scrambled to his feet, and followed Arthur.

Arthur was bending over the bed, and shook his head, when Merlin entered the ruin. "Dead," he said quietly. "They are all dead."

"A plague?" Merlin asked.

"No..." Arthur's voice sounded bitter. "This one died of hunger."

"Sire! Gwaine called for him. "Come quick!"

Merlin and Arthur darted off. Lancelot was kneeling on the ground, holding an old woman in his arms. She was alive.

Carefully, Arthur sank down on his knees, and worriedly looked her over. "What has happened?"

Her eyes widened, as she recognized Arthur. "My Lord," she whispered, "you are dead..."

"I've returned," Arthur simply said. "Please, tell us what happened."

"We were ambushed. They took everything, devastated our houses, destroyed the fields, and killed our stock. We sent word to Camelot, but nobody helped us. Nobody." Her voice slurred, and she slowly closed her eyes.

Grimly, Arthur looked at Lancelot. "We need to get back to Camelot. Why could neither Gwen or the knights help these poor people?"

"Should we give them a decent burial?" Merlin asked, and his voice was trembling. Had he let Camelot down? Maybe he could have supported them, if he had gone back to the castle. What had happened to Gwen? And Gaius?

"I'm afraid we don't have time for this, Merlin, "Arthur said, and stood up.

The sun was low. In a few hours it would be dark. Arthur sadly glanced at the dead woman. "We need to keep going."

On their way, they passed other destroyed and plundered villages and settlements. They had to ride past corpses and carcasses. Finally, the darkness took over, and they could no longer see all the misery.

Arthur motioned to them to stop. They were tired and hungry, but the terrible images flooding through their minds, kept them on their toes.

"I collect firewood," Merlin mumbled, and he walked away. Suddenly, he felt a hand on his shoulder. Startled, he let the twigs fall from his limp hands.

"Sorry, Merlin," Gwaine said, and bent down to help him.

"I deeply regret, telling Morgana, where you and Arthur had been heading to. I thought I was stronger...but I failed."

"You haven't failed, Gwaine," Merlin replied, and picked up the last twigs. "I couldn't have...we couldn't have defeated her, otherwise."

Gwaine gave a shaky laugh. "I'm glad the witch is dead. And I'm proud of you, Merlin. You never left Arthur's side. He should knight you."

"He'd better not. You haven't seen me fighting, Gwaine," Merlin chuckled. "I am very happy to be Arthur's servant, and glad that you have come back." He hesitated. "Gwaine, don't get me wrong, but why are you here? The prophecy only spoke of Arthur."

"I don't know anything about a prophecy," Gwaine said, scratching the back of his head. "I heard a voice telling me that the knights of the round table must be at Arthur's command no matter what. Since Lancelot, Elyan and I are the first men, Arthur has knighted, we deserve a second chance. Trust me, I will use it, and make the best out of it."

"Yes, Arthur needs us – all of us," Merlin said.

Gwaine gnawed on his lip. "I just don't get, why Lancelot is here, too. He has betrayed Arthur."

Merlin raised his eyebrows. "Uh...actually, it wasn't Lancelot. Morgana had raised him from the dead. He was a shade, not a real person."

Gwaine's breath hitched in his throat. "Morgana. I should have known...Lancelot has far too much honour."

Slowly, Merlin nodded. "Don't blame him. It wasn't his fault."

Gwaine smiled at him. "Let's go back to the camp. We don't want our king to catch a cold."

When they returned to the camp they had set up, Merlin looked around. Lancelot and Elyan seemed tired and exhausted. Assuming that they had to fight a battle in Camelot, they needed to rest. And Arthur...

Where was Arthur?

"Gwaine, can you get the fire started? I need to check on Arthur," Merlin said, and gave the collected firewood to him.

Confused, Gwaine gazed after him. Then he began to pile up the twigs and branches.

Lancelot got up, and fetched a cauldron and the supplies, they had taken from the outlaws.

Merlin didn't even have to use his magic to locate Arthur. The king was sitting under a tree, leaning his back against the trunk. His eyes were closed, but he wasn't asleep.

Merlin sat down on a rock, and watched him.

How was Arthur feeling? He had been in Avalon for the last months, not even thinking of an early return. And now he was here, and his kingdom was in grave danger.

"Arthur," Merlin quietly said, "everything will be just fine."

Arthur opened his eyes, and gave Merlin a puzzled look. "Why do you have so much faith in me? I am not sure I deserve it."

Merlin shrugged his shoulders. "You shouldn't doubt yourself. You have been a great king, and you will be one in the future. You are special, Arthur Pendragon."

"Right, I've forgotten that you are not an idiot. You played that role almost too well." Arthur smiled, and lowered his head. "I have the feeling that all of my good deeds, and my victories are all due to you. I always thought I was a great warrior, but maybe I am wrong."

Merlin leaned forward. "You are more than a decent fighter. You have made important decisions. You have always acted for the common good. You have never hesitated risking your life to save your subjects and friends."

"Same as you. I am truly sorry, Merlin. You deserve more than a plain thank you."

"I've already told you that it's my destiny to serve you. You don't need to thank me." Stifling a yawn, Merlin stretched, and held out his arm to help Arthur up.

Arthur grabbed his hand, and let himself be pulled up. "You are extraordinary, Merlin. Together, we are a good team."

"Although I am a sorcerer?" Merlin silently asked, looking back at the camp. Gwaine had managed to light up a smoky fire, on which Lancelot was grilling sausages.

"I guess so," Arthur replied and gently patted his shoulder. "I need more time. I want to ask you a lot of questions...but not here." He nodded at the knights.

"I will answer them honestly," Merlin replied. "You should eat something, and then get some rest, Sire."

Together, they walked back to the bonfire. "Who is responsible for the smoke?" Arthur growled. "What if somebody sees it? Merlin, what..."

Surprised, Merlin raised his eyebrows. "Sire, you know that I am capable of building a fire."

"Uh," Gwaine interjected, grinning mischievously. "Merlin is innocent. Something has gone wrong..."

"Anyway, it is not your duty. He is the servant," Arthur grunted. "Gwaine, you and Merlin take first watch." Hastily, he grabbed one of the sausages, and stuffed it into his mouth. "I am going to sleep now."

Sadly, Merlin sighed. Then he fetched himself a blanket, and sat down next to the fire. With a branch, he poked the blaze, until the flames flared up, and the smoke cleared away.

Elyan unrolled his blanket next to Arthur's, and lied down. "Sire, do you think Gwen is all right? I couldn't bear losing her."

"I don't know," Arthur said, grinding his teeth. "We can only hope to get there in time."

Lancelot handed Merlin the sausages, but he pressed his lips together, and shook his head.

Thankfully, Gwaine reached out, and took the spit. He devoured all of them. Merlin pulled his knees closer to his body, and gazed tiredly at the licking flames.

He had seen it in Arthur's eyes. The king was under a lot of pressure. And every time he felt all control slipping from his fingers, he took it out on his servant. Arthur was scared.

Merlin could almost feel his heart beating painfully fast in his chest, although Arthur's eyes were closed.

The king did not sleep.

Merlin could hear his voice in his head, begging him to hold him.

"Just hold me."

Arthur had nearly crushed him. His armor had bitten into his skin. Merlin had felt dizzy and weak, but he had never stopped holding him.

When Arthur had looked at him, he had caught a glimpse of Arthur's soul in his terrified, pain-filled eyes.

It had been pure, and white, and broken.

Merlin wanted to fix him.

"Do you want the last sausage?" Gwaine sheepishly asked, flopping down next to him.

"No, thank you," Merlin said sullenly, and threw another log on the fire.

"Merlin, you have changed," Gwaine pointed out, taking a bite from his sausage. "When you were in that cave, have you found what you've been looking for? And how did you get to Arthur?"

"The cave?" Merlin repeated. The memories of the crystal cave had already started to fade, as if they belonged to another life.

"Yes, I found what I had been looking for. I thought I could save Arthur, but I was too late." Merlin lowered his head. "I could only bring him to Avalon."

"Merlin, I am sure, you did everything to help Arthur. At least, you didn't get yourself killed." Gwaine laughed hoarsely.

"You were brave, Gwaine. Morgana was a powerful witch. You couldn't have stopped her, but you bought us more time. Without you, we wouldn't have gotten that far."

"Thank you, Merlin." Gwaine stretched, and rubbed at his eyes. "You are looking tired. Why don't you lie down, and sleep? I make sure nothing happens."

"Arthur has punished both of us. If he finds one of us sleeping, he will be furious," Merlin murmured, and nervously glanced at Arthur, who had finally fallen asleep.

"You did nothing wrong. I don't get why Arthur can never thank you. He doesn't deserve you. You do everything for him, and he treats you like dirt. Go to sleep, I can see that you can barely keep your eyes open," Gwaine with a friendly smile.

"He has thanked me," Merlin quietly replied. "I like being his servant, no matter how he treats me. But you are right. I could use some sleep. Please wake me up, when you are getting tired." Merlin spread his blanket near the fire, ensuring he stayed close to Arthur.

It was still dark, when Arthur awakened. For a moment he just lied there, staring into the night sky. It was strange perceiving the different odours and colours. He could hear the fire crackling. The ground was rough and uncomfortable.

He rolled onto his side, and looked directly at Merlin's pale face.

He was sleeping. His servant was sleeping. He had ordered him to keep guard! Arthur was about to jump to his feet, and rouse him, when he realized how worn he looked. Merlin had dark circles around his eyes, and his skin was ghostly pale in the moonlight. Arthur had been with him the whole day, and yet he had failed to notice that Merlin was even more skinny.

Merlin shifted in his sleep, letting out a soft moan. Arthur decided to let him sleep. He clearly needed the rest. Merlin looked so vulnerable and innocent, and it was hard to believe that he had killed an entire army.

He scrambled to his feet, and walked to the bonfire to warm himself up. He could at least relieve Gwaine, who had turned his back on him, staring into the flames.

"Sire," Gwaine said, when Arthur cleared his throat. "Don't get mad at Merlin. He was bone-tired. The poor fellow had had a rough time."

"I know," Arthur calmly replied. "You should try to get some rest, too. I keep watch."

"Thank you, Sire." Gwaine grabbed his blanket, and lied down. Lancelot began to stir, and slowly sat up. When he saw Arthur sitting by the fire, he crouched to him.

"Lancelot," Arthur said, studying the knight, "what you have done to Gwen...I don't understand...you knew I loved her, and she loved me."

Lancelot cringed. "I'm truly sorry, Sire. Morgana used necromancy. She brought me back, but without a soul. I didn't want to cause you any pain. I couldn't do anything." He fell silent, a shiver ran down his spine.

Arthur's eyes widened. "Morgana," he mouthed. "I would have nearly lost Gwen. She tried everything to destroy me. I'm sorry that she did this to you, and now I understand why you were allowed to come back. After all, you are one of my bravest knights."

"Seems like it's not easy to get rid of me," Lancelot replied. "It is an honour to fight with you for Camelot."

Arthur raked his hand through his hair. "I wished I knew who our enemies are."

"No matter who or what it is – you will defeat it," Lancelot said, without any doubt in his voice. He sat down next to Arthur, looking into the sky. The darkness was penetrated by small specks of pale sunlight. Dawn was breaking.

xxxx

The crimson-red sun had barely risen over the treetops, when Arthur roused his manservant. "Rise and shine, Merlin," he said, pulling away the blanket.

Confused, Merlin slid his eyes open. "What..." Suddenly, he recollected the events of the past day. Quickly, he sat up, and stared at the king. "Arthur, you are back! You are all back!"

Arthur couldn't help but chuckle. "Get up, and prepare breakfast. A long ride lies ahead of us."

"Yes, Sire." Straight away, Merlin stood up, and placed the cauldron over the fire. Suddenly hesitating, Merlin turned to Arthur, and raised one eyebrow. "Rise and shine? That's my saying."

"I know," Arthur said, beaming at him. "I can remember every single morning, you tortured me with your silly lines." The other knights stretched their stiff muscles. Gwaine yawned. He was still sitting on the ground, holding his wounded arm.

"Truth is, you love them," Merlin noticed grinning. "It will be my pleasure to wake you up every day, once we are back in Camelot."

"You don't have to be my servant, you know," Arthur began quietly, glancing at his knights. Lancelot and Elyan were taking care of the horses, whereas Gwaine was busy redressing his wound with a strip of cloth.

A stricken look crossed Merlin's face. "You're sacking me? Because...Because I am a sorcerer?" he whispered shocked.

"No," Arthur hissed annoyed. "That's not what I meant. How could you do all this dirty work for me? I bossed you around...I insulted you. How could you endure it?"

"It is my destiny to protect you, Arthur. To become your manservant was the best thing that ever happened to me. I could always be at your side, watching out for you. I always liked to be your servant. Even though you can be quite an ass sometimes."

"You still puzzle me, Merlin," Arthur admitted.

Merlin shrugged his shoulders. "Breakfast is ready, Sire."

"That smells delicious," Gwaine remarked, scrambling to his feet.

Lancelot, who had finished watering the horses, pulled some plates out of his saddlebags, and brought them to the blazing bonfire.

Before Merlin poured the steaming hot soup into their bowls, Arthur cleared his throat. "Knights – friends, tomorrow we will arrive at Camelot. You have always been loyal to me, and I'm glad I am not alone."

"We didn't actually have a choice," Gwaine said with a grin, ignoring Lancelot rolling his eyes at him.

"You're never going to change, Gwaine, are you?" Arthur teased him, slapping him on the shoulder. "And now tuck in."

Over the edge of his own plate, Merlin observed the other knights. They seemed to be lost in thoughts. They didn't know what to expect, once they arrived in Camelot.

He himself had no idea, either. During all these months, he heard nothing from neither Gaius nor Gwen. He didn't know how they had taken in Arthur's death.

Percival hadn't come back.

Nobody had looked for him.

What if they had needed his help?

A guilty conscience started nagging him.

If anything had happened to his friends, because he hadn't been there...But he would have never forgiven himself, if he had given up on Arthur. It had been his destiny to wait for him.

Sighing with pleasure, Arthur dropped the spoon into the bowl.

"That was really good! Merlin, do the washing up. Elyan, you saddle the horses."

Merlin leapt to his feet, piling up the dishes, and the kettle, and walked to the small stream near their camp.

The cold water drove away the fatigue, and he knelt down to wash his face.

Suddenly, something sharp was pressed against his back, and he stiffened. "Arthur, that's not funny," he said through clenched teeth.

"Turn around slowly, and don't do anything stupid," a voice hissed into his ear. The point of the sword painfully jabbed his back.

"What do you want from me?" Merlin asked tensely, lifting his hands, and turning around.

Who was this man? Did he belong to the bandits? Did he know with whom he travelled? Was he alone?

Merlin strained his ears. The camp had not been ambushed.

The man tilted his head to one side. "They are knights of Camelot," he stated. "Why are they here? Answer my, boy." Threateningly, he raised his rusty sword, and pressed it against Merlin's throat.

"Merlin, what are you doing down there? We need to go," he could Arthur call him.

Surprised, the man looked in the direction of the voice. Merlin's eyes glowed, as he reached out with his hand. His opponent was hurled through the air, and passed out before he hit the ground.

"Merlin!" Startled, the warlock spun round. Arthur was standing right behind him.

"Are you all right?" he asked, eyeing him suspiciously.

"I'm fine," Merlin replied.

Nervously, Arthur looked around, but he couldn't discover anyone else. "You are so powerful," he began. "So powerful..."

Merlin bit his bottom lip. "Only to help you, Arthur..." He bent down to pick up the dishes.

"Who has taught you all this?" Arthur asked, and Merlin froze.

Slowly, he turned around. "I was born with magic, Arthur. It's like breathing...or sleeping. I've never decided to become a sorcerer. It has always been a part of me."

Arthur stared at him, as if he had turned into a troll. "But...that's not possible. Magic needs to be studied. I have seen the books containing spells and incantations."

"Gaius has given me a book of magic to help me control my powers. Arthur, I..."

"Sire? Merlin? We should hurry up," Gwaine shouted at them.

"We will talk about that, later," Arthur said, and jogged back to the camp.

Sadly, Merlin gathered up the dishes, and followed him.

They rode in silence for a few hours. The sun rose steadily higher. Merlin watched Arthur turning his head towards the light, enjoying the warmth on his skin.

Arthur sensed that he was being watched. He slid his eyes open, and turned to his servant.

Merlin softly smiled at him. "We will establish peace in Albion, Sire," he said. "And you will be happy."

Arthur forced a weak grin on his lips, and looked ahead on the path. Happy. He thought of Gwen, the love of his life.

How had she coped with his death? How was she?

Was Merlin right? Was she in danger?

He felt sorry for letting her down. He hadn't said goodbye to her. He hadn't even told her how much he loved her. "Hold on, Guinevere. I'm coming," he whispered, urging his horse into a gallop.

Almost instantly, the others copied his actions. A short time later, Merlin rode up to him. "Sire, we should take a break, and rest. Camelot is close, and we must prepare ourselves for the worst."

Arthur raised his arms, motioning to the others to stop. Tethering his horse, Arthur said to Merlin: "What if I am late? What if I fail them again? Why is everybody expecting me to do great things? I'm scared, Merlin."

Merlin, who had pulled the leftovers out of his saddlebags, stopped, and looked at Arthur. "You will not fail, Arthur. You were sent back, because you are the only one, who can help Albion. Believe in yourself! Besides, you are not alone. I will always be at your side."

Arthur looked up. "Thank you, Merlin. Thank you for being with me." He reached out with his arm, and patted Merlin on the shoulder. But hen he grimaced, as if he were in pain. "But you're not Gwen...Our relationship has been put through many things. I just want to be with her."

"I know, Sire," Merlin said chuckling. Then he became serious again. "No matter how this day will end. Things will fall into place. I know that."

Gwaine threw the collected firewood at Merlin's feet. "This time you can start the fire by yourself," he said laughing. Lancelot and Elyan had already sat down, and were quietly talking to each other.

"Thank you, Gwaine," Merlin replied, and picked up the twigs.

Arthur took a sip of his water skin. A weak smile crept over his face, as he observed Merlin struggling with the fire stones.

Suddenly, Merlin's eyes glowed, and the wood caught fire.

Arthur choked on his water, and started to cough. "Merlin," he croaked hoarsely.

"Yes, Sire?" his servant asked innocently.

"Water the horses", Arthur snapped at him, grabbing the food bag.

"Of course, Sire." Merlin couldn't hide a smirk, as he went to the stream to get some water for the horses.

When he came back, the knights had eaten everything. Sighing, he wanted to sit down, but Arthur shouted: "We need to keep going, if we want to reach Camelot before nightfall."

Disbelievingly, Merlin stared at Arthur, and whispered: "That's not what I meant, when I said we need to rest, Arthur."

"I drank, ate, and relaxed my sore muscles. I'm ready to go," Arthur said, his voice determined.

"How very generous of you to think of me," Merlin answered with dry sarcasm, and untethered his horse.

Arthur pretended to not hear him, as he mounted his horse. "Here," Lancelot said, handing Merlin a slice of dry bread.

"Thank you," Merlin mumbled, and got on his horse. Arthur had already spurred his horse forward.

"He doesn't mean it," Lancelot said, trying to cheer Merlin up. "Arthur knows, how important you are to him...and Camelot."

"I know," Merlin sighed. "But I just thought that he would treat me differently...now that he knows what I did for him."

"Give him time, Merlin. It's not easy to come back from the dead. The world has changed. You are not the same person anymore. You seem whole again, but your soul has been shattered into tiny pieces." Sadness washed over Lancelot, and he shivered.

"Really?" Merlin seemed surprised. "I didn't know that. I'm sorry. I thought... you came back...and everything is as it has always been. Arthur has to be under a lot of pressure. I hope he doesn't overdo it."

"We well all watch out for him, and guard him with our lives," Lancelot said. "That's what we have sworn, when he knighted us."

"I am not a knight," Merlin stated.

"You would be one of the bravest and most loyal knights, Camelot has ever seen," Lancelot said. "Maybe one day people will show you the respect you deserve."

"That's not why I'm doing this," Merlin objected. "I just don't want to hide anymore."

Lancelot smiled at him. "Now that Arthur knows, things will change."

They finally left the forest. In the distant, they could see Camelot towering on a hill. Arthur had brought his horse to a stand, and stared wide-eyed at the castle.

He could clearly remember the day, he had left to fight his last battle. He had never thought, he would see Camelot again.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" Gwaine said, petting his horse's neck.

"It's home", Arthur mumbled, urging his horse forward.