Authors Note: More chapters soon! :) We're very close to end. Sorry about the late update! Financial problems and life have been fucking me. Hope you're still here and leave me a review if you are, it'd mean a lot.

Creak.

I woke up with a start, panting, eyes flickering about. I couldn't see anything in the heavy darkness. The only light in the room was a pool of moonlight shining through the window but that wasn't nearly enough illumination to reveal who had opened the door. And I was sure someone had. I quieted my breath, reaching for my katana at the side of the bed, eyes wide. I could hear the sound of footsteps approaching me...

Soft ones. A woman's step.

I sighed and relief flooded through me. "Rei, Yuuki, whoever the hell you are...I told you I'm exhausted. Can't I just sleep? Fuck, what time is-" I trailed off as the woman stepped just close enough that I could finally see her. My breath caught in my throat. Golden, shimmering hair. Bright eyes. An amazingly large bust. She was wearing a robe and her long hair cascaded down over her shoulders and immense breasts, which heaved with every breath she drew.

"Shizuka," I whispered, "what are you doing here?"

Shizuka cocked her head to the side. For a moment, she said nothing. Just stared at me, her eyes sad and her mouth drawn into a frown. Then, she put one knee on the bed, grabbed the ties of her robe...and pulled it off of her. Presented her beautiful, half bare body to me...My eyes moved on their own. Roaming over her large, puffy nipples and soft stomach. She was wearing panties but I could see a wet stain on the front. I choked, swallowing hard. I couldn't think or say anything. Just stared.

My mouth was dry. All the blood in my body had shot straight between my legs...Shizuka's nipples hardened the more I stared and a trail of wetness started streaming down her thighs.

"Shizuka...We can't do this."

"Saeko," She whispered,, her voice so quiet I could barely hear it. It sounded like she was in pain. Like just saying my name was too much for her. The bed sunk under her weight as she crawled toward me. Above me. Her huge breasts trailed across the bed, her nipples skimming the blanket and hardening even more. Then, her face was mere inches from mine. Her sweet breath gently hitting my face... "Saeko," she whispered again and pushed her mouth against mine. I moaned as she immediately began to suck and lick at my lips as if begging for entrance.

"I love you," she moaned against my mouth, "I love you so much." Her mouth tasted so delicious. Her saliva was hot and sticky. "One last time...before I leave. I need it."

Somehow, I had forgotten about that. I'd been so caught up in her beauty. So surprised by this night ambush, so aroused that it'd flown out of my mind... Shizuka was leaving me. Leaving with Rika... If I was in her again I wouldn't be able to let her go. Flashes of anger filled me. Shizuka was leaving me...fuck, she was really leaving me. Wasn't she!? I groaned against her lips, my arms tightening around her waist, pulling her closer. Our breasts pressed together, the sensation mind-numbing. I dug my fingers into her bare back and ran my fingertips across the flat expanse of her back and then I mustered all of my willpower. I moved my hands up, wrapped them around her shoulders... and pushed Shizuka away.

It was probably the hardest thing I'd ever done.

Shizuka gasped like I'd hit her or something. Her delicate features were so full of pain. I didn't want her to be sad, I didn't want her to be upset...but we couldn't do this. "Saeko...why?"

"Shizu..." I panted, trying to think clearly. It was hard to do when I had a rapid, hard pulse between my legs. My cock felt like it'd burst from a mere touch. Shizuka had always done that to me. She was the first woman I loved. Letting her go...letting her go hurt so much, and I don't think she saw it that way. "You're with Rika. Your fiance. We can't do these things. You're cheating."

For a moment, there was a swollen silence in the air. I felt like if I reached out I could pop the tension between us like a bubble. She knew I was right. I could see it in her face. The guilt in her eyes. The shame. That was the only way to end this. To take advantage of that shame. Otherwise, I wouldn't be able to turn her away. I was weak. I wanted her so much, and I wanted her to stay so badly it hurt. I focused on the fact that I wanted to be a good person. That I loved her. That she would be better off with Rika who cared about her so much. Who didn't have a bunch of girls already. Who risked her life to make it here... I wasn't selfish anymore. I was willing to give her up...

"Rika loves you. She wants to be with you, Shizuka. I can't be what you want me to be. I'm not the hero I thought I was. The one who rescued you in that infirmary, who held your hand and ...was cruel to you. I'm trying to be a better person."

My sweet nurse teared up. "Don't say that."

I didn't want to say it. But I had to. "I'm never going to be completely yours. Like you want me to be. And you'll never be completely mine like I want you to be. You've told me yourself...you don't want to see me with Rae, and Yuuki, and -"

"Don't bring them up!" Shizuka yelled. I was startled into silence. Her voice was a deadly hiss. Her eyes hardened. "You were mine and they took you from me! I loved you. We were happy, and Rae...Rae stole you away while we were at Rika's house. She turned you against me. Away from me, and me against you and I...let her do that. But I won't be like that anymore. That day that you rescued me...you said I'm your girl. That you loved me. You told me you'd always take care of me and yet you're letting me leave you! Yet you're fucking other girls like I mean nothing! Why am I not enough? Why is Saya's mother okay, but I'm not! Tell me! Tell me why you won't fight for me! Tell me why you don't love me the most anymore, now that I finally love you the most! Tell me, Saeko!"

I was stunned. Finally...loved me the most? How cruel, Shizuka...I shook my head. Ignored those words. "I'm letting you go because I love you, Shizuka."

Shizuka shook her head and much to my shock she clambered up above me again and buried her face in my hair. I heard her inhale deeply, felt her shuddering breath against my ear. I didn't know what to say. Didn't know what to do. So I just laid there. Her chest rested against mine, and I could feel her heart beating away... Shizuka drew back and stared into my eyes. "Why do you suddenly have self-control?"

I wasn't going to tell her that it took every speck of my willpower not to pin her down and fuck her right now. Especially after she said she loved me the most. Instead, I said nothing. I just swallowed. She accepted my silence with a sad smile. "So cruel, Saeko."

I smiled weakly. "I know."

Shizuka buried her face in my hair again, nuzzled against my neck. "So you won't make love to me..." I shook my head. She exhaled heavily. Then wrapped her arms around my neck, shifting above me. I groaned when I felt her large, succulent ass press into my crotch. The weight was delicious, enveloping my clothed dick in the most delightful way...

"Fuck, Shi-"

"Shh." Shizuka whispered, running her fingers through my hair, gazing into my eyes. She rolled her ass in a circle, sparking pleasure in my gut, causing my dick to fully harden. I felt like I was going to burst at any second...

"Shizuka I just told you we can't do this," I grunted, gritting my teeth.

Shizuka smiled, it was bittersweet. "We're not doing anything. I am. Just be quiet, Saeko." Without another word she shifted back further. I could feel the sweltering heat of her dripping pussy even through our undergarments. Her moisture immediately seeped through the cloth. God, she was so wet...I had an idea of what she was doing...and it turned me on. She was getting herself off on me. Her eyes didn't leave mine for a second. When she rubbed her clit into the hardened shaft of my dick, she moaned deeply, pushing her forehead against mine. She kissed me, smacking her lips against mine repeatedly, breathing so heavily...I realized after a second that I was panting too.

A jolt of electricity shot up my spine and through my stomach every time she rolled her hips. Knowing her pussy was so close to me, separated by mere cloth, made it nearly impossible to focus on anything but her body. She buried her fingers in my dark hair, tugged, nibbled at my lip as she kissed me. "You're unfair so I will be too, Saeko," she whispered, breathless. Her hips kept moving. Her crotch rubbed into mine over and over. I groaned.

"You're abandoning me." She licked a wet strip across my mouth. Those words tore into me.

"I-I'm not...it's for your own good. It's...it's cause I love you...Rika will-"

"Rika loves me more than you. Is that it?" Her words were so venomous, yet still spoken so sensually. Or maybe I was just caught up in the feeling of her thick ass rubbing into my dick along with her dripping entrance. I wanted to rip her panties off and do more than just grind against each other but I wouldn't...I couldn't. No matter what she said..! She wouldn't get a rise out of me.

"Not true," I whispered, "I love you more than Rika does... I love all of you more than anyone."

Shizuka's eyes glistened with tears and I gasped in pain as her hand hit my face. Hard. She'd slapped me! I didn't respond. Just laid there. "Don't mention them!..." She reached down between her thighs and grabbed onto my swollen crotch. Her fingers were rough, but it felt amazing anyways. My hips bucked as a bolt of pleasure shot through me.

"Fuck..." I whispered, teeth clenched.

"Do you really love me? Or any of us?" She whispered, grabbing me by the chin. "Or does your greedy little thing love us?" She emphasized her words by tightening her grip on my member, gently massaging the shaft. I grunted. What was she saying? That I just lusted for her? That I didn't love her? She couldn't honestly believe that was true...I loved all of them, so much. "Is that why I'm not enough? Am I too old for you? You just want-"

"Shizuka," I grimaced, "You and I both know that's not it! It's nothing like that, fuck-" She interrupted me with a rough squeeze of my junk. So rough it hurt. "I love you. I don't want to let you go but we can't make this work! Damn it, we can't no matter how hard we try! You have Rika and I have-"

Shizuka pulled my boxer briefs down, shoving them down my legs. My erect member sprung out immediately, pre already dripping from the tip.. Wordlessly, Shizuka sat more firmly in my lap. Cushioned my member between her glistening thighs. I whimpered. I didn't want to push her away. But I should...I'd never been good at pushing anyone away. Especially not Shizuka...I wrapped my fingers around her shoulders, trembling.. "S-Shizuka we...I told you we can't...if you do this I can't..."

Her eyes met mine. She wore a nasty smile. I'd never seen it before. "Then push me away. Over and over. Make me leave." Her lips kissed at mine, her hand gently stroking my member. I trembled, hips jerking. I was incredibly hard. I had to resist the urge to come then and there...I lightened my hold on her shoulders. Gently squeezed them. Ran my fingers across her soft, slender neck. Ran my thumb across her plump lips...then buried my fingers in her hair. Shizuka trembled at my touch, thrusting her immense chest forward. I couldn't...the sight of them alone drove me into a frenzy.

She just looked so beautiful. A million fears rushed through my head. What if Shizuka died while I wasn't with her? I couldn't let Rika take her away, I couldn't let anyone take her away...Fuck! She was mine. I tightened my grip on her jaw. Dug my nails into her skin. She winced, but she didn't pull away.

"That's the look...the look I love," she whispered breathlessly. I trembled. "Those crazy eyes...I want them watching over me forever."

'

"You...you want to be with Rika..." I hissed. "I...can't share you."

I expected her to call me out on my hypocrisy. To get angry. Instead, she nodded. "I know. She's already touched me and it wasn't the same. She doesn't have your angry, red-hot gaze. Pinning me down yet making me feel safe at the same time. Your rough, angry touch. Your sweet, beautiful eyes. Her cock isn't the same either. Yours hits me just right, it fills me up, every part of me... The feeling of you inside me...the feeling of your lips pressed against mine...I can't give them up. I tried to be a good girl. A good fiance but...I can't leave you with all these girls. I'd rather stay and suffer than leave and ache for you..."

I exhaled. Buried my fingers into her hair and pulled until she whimpered in pain. A million thoughts ran through my head, I was in turmoil. All my emotions were drowning me. Lust and anger and frustration and jealousy. How many times had Rika touched her before?! It made me angry and yet I had no right to be. I enjoyed the way Shizuka winced when I pulled her hair, the way she smiled in bliss as I spread her thighs apart with my legs.

"Say it."

"Which part?" She whispered, gently swirling her hips.

"That you love me more."

She trembled and I dug my fingers into her scalp. "I love you more." She gasped in delight as I twisted her hair, tugging her head back.

"Say it again," I whispered as I used my free hand to pull her panties aside. She whimpered.

"I love you more."

"Say her name, too. Be specific, Shizuka." I adjusted my hips, rested the head of my cock pressed against her weeping entrance now. It was unbearably hot and it was hard not to just start fucking her then and there. Shizuka was mine. It was twisted, but this was what I'd wanted. I felt pity for Rika, I felt guilt. But I wanted Shizuka more than I respected Rika...damn me. Damn my body and heart for being weak. I couldn't let her go. I knew that the second she told me she was leaving. That it would end up like this.

"I love you more than Rika," Shizuka gasped immediately, breathless. The guilt on her face made me even harder. Fuck. I couldn't hold back. I shoved myself inside her, gasping. I threw my head back as pleasure enveloped me.. Shizuka was amazingly tight, her pussy grasping at the head of my dick as I slid inside. Sopping wet too, dripping all over my member. I stilled my hips. Enjoyed the way she gasped in frustration and glared at me.

"No," she whined, "keep going~"

"Say those words again... Every time you say them I'll move my hips and if you don't...then I won't fuck you, Shizu. Say you're mine. Say that you love my cock more. Love me more. More than her." I spat the words out through clenched teeth.

Shizuka's expression was so strange. Blissful yet pained, so clouded by lust. So hungry for me. She was mine. She had been since we met and she'd realized that too late but if she did this...I was willing to give her another chance. Another chance to be mine. I'd take care of her, love her, protect her... As long as she broke up with Rika.. That was all that mattered. It was twisted. I was disturbed. It was disgustingly hypocritical...but...it was the only way I'd accept her. And she knew that. That's why she crawled into my bed. That's why she was here. My heart thumped against my chest.I was overjoyed to hear her say what she already had. I love you more, more than Rika. But I wanted more. Needed it.

"I...I love you more than Rika." I thrust, hard. She gushed around my dick, eyes rolling. "Yessss Saeko..." I clenched my teeth, sweat building. She was so fucking hot. Her huge breasts hanging in my face, her lust-hungry eyes and happy smile. I shoved my dick as deep as I could.

"Say it more!"

"Your dick is so much better than hers! I love you more Saeko! I love you more than Rika! I love you so much! So don't let me go, keep loving me forever!" I obeyed her, beginning to thrust hard but steadily. She rode me, gasping with delight, gripping my shoulders. Her breasts bounced as I began to use more force. Her nipples were so hard...they looked tasty. I leaned over and captured one in my mouth, sucking hard. The swollen nub was hot in my mouth. I sucked and swirled my tongue around her nipple. She buried her fingers in my hair now, leaning closer. "S-Saeko! I love the way your tongue feels..." I tugged her hair and pulled my mouth away.

"Keep saying it," I hissed, freezing my hips.

Shizuka stared at me.. She looked so beautiful in the dark. Her long, golden hair. Her bright eyes. Her huge, gorgeous breasts and flawless skin...I would never let her go. I was so selfish. I was so hypocritical and narcissistic and cruel but...I didn't care. My sweet, beloved nurse smiled at me. She wrapped her arms around my head, buried my face in her immense bust. Then, she shifted until she was on top of me, squirming around on my cock. I moaned in delight. Fuck, she was so damn wet! Then, she said it.

Everytime the words came from her mouth we thrust our hips together with wet, slippery noises. Our movements were desperate and frenzied. Her breasts were sweaty, yet smelled sweet, and I buried myself in them. I could hardly breathe but I didn't care. We were monsters. So cruel to Rika but I couldn't stop, and neither could Shizuka. We had no right doing this. I had no right holding Shizuka back, making her suffer...Taking her as mine. Maybe we both thought this, but the sound of her voice drowned out my guilt. And I think it drowned out hers, too.

"I love you more! I love you more! I love you more!"