Summary: Dean deals with Castiel calling it quits and just maybe he's right. But who's going to be rational and try to figure that out?
A/N: Such a very long time to wait for an update! My apologies, my dears!

"I have to catch up to him..." Dean whispered into the night air. That's all that mattered, that's all that he needed. "Let go of me." He pulled himself free from Alex's grip and attempted to head to his car but Alex grabbed his wrist.

"If he wanted to be found he wouldn't have ran off." Alex accidentally let slip before pulling Dean back into his hold. How did he know that Castiel had run off? "I don't know what happened but he left for a reason." He ran a hand down Dean's spine and hugged him close. "You always did fall hard."

Dean just stood there. Alex was right, Castiel did leave for a reason but that didn't mean he should just give up on him and let him walk right out of his life. He felt Alex's fingers ghost up under his T-shirt and the touch was cold. "Not for you."

"Excuse me?"

"Not for you, I didn't fall hard for you." He pulled away from Alex again and darted for his car. "You're an asshole, that's why."

To say the least, Alex was shocked because Castiel really had to be something for Dean to just run off like that.

Dean didn't even realize how fast he had been driving until he saw Castiel's house coming into view. His mother's car wasn't in the driveway so that that a good sign at least. He parked a few houses down and ran up to the front door to knock. After about a few seconds or so, he rang the doorbell.

Castiel was heading up to his room when the doorbell echoed throughout the house. When he opened the door he almost contemplated slamming it back closed. "Why are you here?"

Dean frowned and pushed his way into the house. "The fuck you mean why I'm here? Did we not have the same conversation about an hour ago?" He pushed the door closed and glared at Castiel. "Talk to me."

"Dean."

"Cas I swear of you say-"

"There is nothing to talk about." He moved to open the front door again but Dean had grabbed him by the collar and slammed him to the floor within seconds. The next thing he knew, Dean had gotten him pinned with his arms above his head and their fingers laced.

"Don't give me that bullshit. One minute we're all cliché chick flick moment then the next you're out of nowhere telling me to stay away from you with no legit explanation. The fuck is that, Cas?!" He shook his head. "No. I'm not buying the crap. Give me the real reason, Castiel. Convince me to stay away otherwise I can't do that." He gnawed at his bottom lip before speaking again. "I just can't." He was confident that even with the real reason he still wouldn't be able to stay away.

Castiel stared up at Dean with conflicted blue eyes. He didn't know why he expected Dean to just go along with that. Hell, he didn't even convince himself with his halfhearted excuse.

Dean on the other hand didn't expect for Castiel to think so hard about his answer because didn't he already have a reason for it? To say the least, he was surprised when Castiel started talking.

"You have to stay away from me because I love the way that you treat people. I love the way that you talk and laugh. I like how your lips look and how you lick then them while reading. I think it is a habit you have formed. I like how you show everyone respect and how creative you are. I like how smart you are. I love how you try your best at things even when it goes awry. I love that you don't judge people and that you are honest. I love every single thing about you, Dean Winchester, and I do not want to see someone do wrong by you." He paused finally and glanced off to the side. "And I do not want to be the reason that someone does wrong by you."

Dean stared at him in shock and fuck, he was blushing because of Castiel's words. "W-what- wait..." He loosened his grip and sat up straight, straddling Castiel's waist. "Do wrong by me?" He didn't even know where to start. Castiel had said so much. "No one is doing wrong by me, Cas."

Castiel closed his eyes and huffed. "Dean, you have to trust me, okay?"

"How the fuck am I supposed to trust you when you're telling me to stay away from you?!"

"Dean, please." Castiel whispered before pushing himself up into sitting position. He placed a hand on Dean's hip. "Please." He wanted nothing more than to just kiss and tell him that nothing was wrong but he couldn't. He brought his hand to the other's cheek but Dean instantly turned his head away from the touch. Castiel couldn't blame him.

"I can't." He pushed off of the other boy and stood from the floor.

"Dean, wait."

"No, I get it." He moved to the door but Castiel grabbed his wrist.

Castiel pulled him close and kissed his forehead. "I'm sorry."

Dean pulled away and left the house. He was confused because how could Castiel love that many things about him but still want to keep his distance? He just didn't understand.

Two months later—

Two months had passed and they had no contact. Castiel avoided the Winchester's house and met with Sam after school at the library. That worked out until he had no choice but to visit the house. He knew he was going to run into Dean but he had to map out how he would react. Would they speak? Would Dean ignore him? He had no idea how he was going to handle it all. It had been so long.

"Sam," Castiel called out lowly. "Is your brother home?" He asked, trying not to sound anxious but he was sure that Sam sensed it.

"Not yet, he's at the shop working on a car for Bobby." He led Castiel into the kitchen and over to the table by the window. He wasn't blind; he knew something was up with those two. Castiel hadn't been over like he used to, Dean didn't talk about Castiel anymore and they both were acting weird. "So yeah, what's up with you guys?"

Castiel shook his head quickly. "Nothing."

"Yeah, that was totally believable, how about you try that again." He unzipped his backpack and pulled out his homework. "Don't lie to me either, you're a horrible liar. You both have been acting really weird. You've been avoiding our house like the plague and Dean is all mopey. What happened?"

"We broke up?" He wasn't sure if they had even dating but Castiel assumed this was what a breakup felt like.

"What?!"

"Sam..." This was not what he wanted to discuss.

"Sorry. You okay?" Sam felt bad really. He had been teasing Dean lately about why he wasn't with his other half but now he knew and he felt like such a dick for constantly making his brother think about someone he cares about.

Someone he was no longer with.

Castiel shook his head. "No."

"You guys should talk."

"There is nothing for us to discuss, Sam. We are over." He felt his chest tighten and he wished he hadn't have mentioned Dean. "Can we...get started?"

"Uh yeah, sure thing, here is what I have." He wasn't surprised that Castiel wanted to change the subject. He and Dean seemed to have gotten close and to suddenly break up was obviously taking its toll on the tutor.

Dean felt his heart sink when he pulled up because the last thing he expected was to see Castiel back at their house. He was kind of riding on notion that the other avoiding his house. They hadn't spoken since that night at Castiel's house and maybe that was a good thing for Dean. He couldn't fret over him if he wasn't around, right? Wrong. He constantly thought about him. He spent so much time thinking of ways to touch Castiel, maybe a light brush of fingers or press his face into his neck to remember how he felt. Or maybe pressing his lips against the other boys because he liked the way he tasted. He spent more time thinking of that than actually being mad at him. He missed him.

The one thing that he didn't think of was how to talk with him after everything that had happened. It wasn't like Dean hadn't ever broken up with anyone— in fact, he had done it a lot and it usually wasn't a hard task. But Castiel broke up with him and Dean had been empty since those words left his lips.

Stay away from me.

That was a hell of a lot easier said than done.

Since he couldn't sit in the driveway forever so he forced himself out of the car, backpack slung over his shoulder as he approached the porch. He took his sweet time opening the door and just as he expected, Castiel was right there, sitting in the kitchen with Sam. "Sammy, I'm home." He said, b-lining for the staircase to head to his bedroom. He didn't want to face him. It hurt but he would never admit that.

Sam looked at Castiel then to the doorway where his brother had flown past in a hurry. "You should go talk to him."

"I cannot."

"You can, you just don't want to. Now go, at least clear the air because the tension is so thick in the house that I can barely breathe. Do you want to kill me?"

Castiel stared at Sam before standing from his seat. Sam was right. It wouldn't hurt to just talk with him. What his mother didn't know wouldn't hurt her. So he nodded to Sam and turned and headed to Dean's bedroom. When he reached the top of the staircase, he pushed open the cracked door and locked eyes on Dean standing in the middle of his room. It looked like he had been pacing. "Dean."

"Cas."

Of course, as if the moment couldn't have gotten more awkward. "I wanted to speak with you." He took a few steps closer and he was sure that Dean did the same thing. "Is that okay?" He asked.

"Yeah, Cas." Dean hated this.

"I am sorry." He cleared his throat and took another step closer. "I mean it." He whispered, eyes focusing too hard on the carpet.

"Yeah?" Dean let his eyes roam over Castiel's features. He really did miss this boy. "That's funny coming from the guy who…" he stopped himself. He refused to get into an argument with him. "I gotta get ready, Cas. Do you need anything else?"

Castiel just stared at him. "No." Disappointed for the lack of a better word was how he felt. He wanted Dean to understand. "Sorry, Dean." He repeated as he backed up to the door, but before he could leave, Dean was shuffling forwards, stepping into him before their lips were joined.

"Why can't you want me?" That was all that Castiel heard the other boy whisper before his lips were covered once again.