Some might say this night was the dusk that brought the dawn of a new era, or that the stars danced like graceful neon swans illuminating the ever-dimming darkness (representing hope in a dark world, says your English teacher), or otherwise lather the scene with cloying adjectives and meaningless words masquerading as "poetry." In all honesty, the evening wasn't very different in terms of darkness or storminess. It was just a simple night. Though there was a reek of cabbage for some unknown, non-plot-related reason.

Bluestar's tail twitched.

She strutted onwards. Flashes of dreams and half-formed prophecies darted in and out of her mind like indecisive mice. Her fur was unkempt, something she thought couldn't happen in StarClan and one of the few things she was really looking forward to when she died (along with a lack of dogs and Firestar's spotlight-hogging). She sighed, remembering how only one of those was true now, and it was arguably the least satisfying one.

Another shape came up in the distance. Bluestar prayed it wasn't a dog or she'd move to the Dark Forest and play tea party with Tigerstar. She also wondered if it was funny to pray since she was practically praying to herself, then silently admonished herself. There was nothing funny about what was going on here. This was a deadly serious matter for serious cats, not for tittering dolts.

Then the shape became Tallstar in a spectacular feat of magic. Or he just got closer. Who knows? Bluestar straightened herself up. Her tail twitched again.

"Hey, Bluestar!" Tallstar mewed, running up to her. "Did you catch a Chosen One today?" He snickered. Bluestar glared.

"Tallstar, this is not a time to laugh at poor jokes."

"Fine." Summoning his deepest and most solemn voice he could, he bellowed, "Do you have any idea who the Chosen One is?"

Ignoring his facetious tone, she answered, "No. I just really hope it's not Firestar again. Seriously, how many prophecies has he starred in? Next he'll fly down from StarClan and shoot rainbows and love everywhere."

Tallstar lashed his tail. "Why are you allowed to joke?"

"Oh, Tallstar. Oh, you poor, sweet, naïve Tallstar." Bluestar stared deeply into Tallstar's eyes. "I'm not joking. Do you really think I ever joke?"

Tallstar shuddered from Bluestar's crazy, serial killer stare, his mouth open but no words coming out. He gulped and then tried again.

"Maybe… a little? No? I— I suppose not? Is that the right answer?"

"It doesn't matter now, Tallstar. Stop chasing after every thought that comes your way. The fate of the entire universe rests in our paws and you're acting like a kit who's just discovered catnip. We need to find the Chosen One if there's any chance of StarClan surviving. And if it's Firestar again I'll murder something small and cute." Bluestar's tail twitched yet another time, possibly because of ticks or mosquitoes. If you got ticks or mosquitoes from reading this then you should collect the bugs and read them this story out loud so they can know where they came from and what their purpose in life is. They have feelings too! Anyway.

"So why does the Chosen One have to be decided by a prophecy? Why couldn't it be me?" Tallstar looked up at Bluestar, causing his face to fall. Genuine hurt flooded his next sentences. "What's that twitchy tail thing you're doing? Is it some kind of rude ThunderClan gesture I don't know about?"

"Stop getting distracted, you mouse-brain!" Bluestar hissed. Then, "I think I might have a tick. Or possibly a mosquito. Anyway, I… don't really see you as… a Chosen One who's gonna save everyone. I'm still trying to remember how you became a leader."

Tallstar opened his mouth but was quickly muffled by Bluestar's obscenely-gesturing tail. Circling around him, Bluestar started to plan. "So why do we need a prophecy to tell us who the Chosen One is? I could make one up right now and who would know the wiser? Well, you of course, and me, but everyone else wouldn't know. They'd think some random kit we picked was the next Firestar. This is great, Tallstar! We could save the world. I've just thought of the greatest plan ever! What do you think?"

"I dunno… shouldn't we wait for a sign or something?"

"By the time we get a sign the Dark Forest will have taken over, the Clans will have broken up, and we'll all have been forgotten with Firestar dancing and prancing over our graves. I'm not sure about you, but I'd much prefer a future where StarClan is still around and the only way that's going to happen is if there is a Chosen One there to save us from the horrible evil of Tiggerclaw and his ragtag band of misfits. Really, all we need to do is send ThunderClan's medicine cat a prophecy, one so annoyingly cryptic they'll have to assume it's real. Then they'll lather him with praise so his ego inflates to the size of the universe and he-or-she could just talk the Dark Forest to death! Or they'll become infatuated with Tigerstar and their twoo wub would cause him to become good. Anything could happen with this cat. There's nothing that could go wrong!"

"I don't think that's a good idea. Why ThunderClan? A little clichéd, don't you think? You know what would be a good Clan to put them in? …WindClan."

"Please. What have you ever done besides chase rabbits down holes and run away from anything remotely scary?"

"Bluestar, that's a stereotype and I don't appreciate that; WindClan is just as great as da almighty FunderClan."

"Whatever lets you sleep at night. But it's my idea, so I get to decide what Clan they're from and I choose you, FunderClan."

"No. WindClan." The two bickering cats locked eyes and stayed silent, as if they were communicating a passionate argument with the subtle movements of their pupils. Several heartbeats passed, their gazes intertwined together in a debate so profound no words could contain it and no mortal could comprehend it. Then, as if their eyes were planets finally escaping each other's gravitational pull, they looked away.

"If we can't decide between our two Clans, we could pick one of the other two," Tallstar mewed. "What about RiverClan?"

"Those fat bastards?"

"ShadowClan?"

"Those bony bastards?"

"…Eh, it doesn't matter anyway. Let them be ThunderClan. You win, you selfish grouch."

"I'm glad you agree. You won't regret this, Tallstar." Bluestar started laughing, a laugh so obviously evil one wondered why she was in StarClan at all.

WindClan is practically the Hufflepuff of the forest.

This takes place at an unspecified time after The Last Hope. I haven't read that book so I don't know what the hell happens, other than apparently some cats die. Like that doesn't happen in every book. So the events in The Last Hope aren't canon in this story.