My dear readers. It's done, this is the last chapter. I did it. Sometimes I thought I couldn't because there were so many stupid story twists and I didn't know what to do with them but now I've found an end. Thanks for reading this story!

And now I hope you enjoy this chapter and please let me know what you think^^

Dean didn't understand how it came to this. They've only decided yesterday that Cas wouldn't sacrifice his life. Not 30 minutes ago they had been happy.

After last night Dean could burst with happiness and now his hands were covered in blood.

Coated with the blood from the love of his life.

He had held it pretty good together until Cas started to scream. Dean had been in awe when he saw the grace and he was mesmerized by the soul. He had felt confident that he would be able to do it, what could go wrong? There was a clear line between the grace and the soul and it should've been easy.

But when Cas started to scream, Dean lost it. His hands started to tremble and his vision went blurry. He stopped the movement and took deliberately deep breaths. "Sam", he croaked, "Sammy, I need you here."

Sam was hovering over Ara, checking for life signs but when he heard Dean he quizzically looked over to him. When he saw how pale Dean's face was, he rushed to his side. "Dean, you have to hurry."

"I can't. I can't do this to him. I can't cause him pain."

"Dean you have to. You can't just stop." Dean held the blade towards Sam. "You have to do it." But Sam shook his head and pushed his hand back. "Cas wanted you to do it. He trusts you."

"I can't. Did you just hear him? God, I can't." "Yes you can. And you have to hurry. Ara's dying and Cas is quickly losing blood. You have to do it now."

Dean knew that his brother was right but he could barely keep his hands still. Cas hadn't mentioned this. He never mentioned that this would cause him so much pain. And Dean didn't knew if he could stomach it.

Sam was still talking to him but he couldn't make out any of the words. All he could see was the blood that ran down Cas' side and dripped to the ground. There was already a little puddle.

And it was red, so very red. Just like his hands.

He couldn't do anything besides watching and waiting for the next drop to fall. And the next. And the next. The puddle was growing constantly, but he couldn't move.

He felt that Sam shook him, maybe even hit him, but he didn't really notice. All he could think of was that this wasn't meant to happen. None of this. Cas wasn't supposed to fall. He shouldn't have to suffer just because he met Dean and Sam.

If Dean had a choice he would tuck Cas away somewhere really safe, so that no one could ever hurt him again. But he couldn't because right now Cas was bleeding out from a wound Dean himself inflicted. And Dean didn't know if he could live with himself if this went wrong. And it would go wrong he knew it.

This was his punishment because he had felt so blessed last night. And now Cas had to suffer for this because he had believed he could have him and be happy.

And another drop felt to the floor.

He distantly realized that Sam tried to pry the blade from his hand but he couldn't open it. He couldn't let Sam do this. If this went horribly wrong and Cas died tonight under Sam's hands he would forever blame his brother and that couldn't happen.

He finally snapped out of it because Cas moaned. He was not dead yet. He would only die if Dean remained inactive. Cas could survive this but only if Dean got his shit together and finally finished what he started.

He shoved Sam out of the way and leaned back over Cas. Sam sighed relieved and went back to look after Ara whose breathing was alarmingly shallow.

Dean regained his focus on the light in Cas chest and found the thin line again. He positioned the blade a second time and this time he braced himself for Cas' screaming. Sure enough he started as soon as Dean applied pressure and it sickened him to hear Cas make those noises but this time Dean didn't stop.

He couldn't because he needed this to be over and he needed Cas healthy and alive. So he just kept on cutting until he finally separated the soul from the grace. "Okay, it's done", he said and turned to Sam. "What now?"

"I think we take the grace and give it to Ara."

Dean nodded and extended his hands. They were shaking again. What if he waited too long? What if Cas' grace wasn't enough to heal Ara? Then they would both die. What if he damaged Cas' soul? What if he lost too much blood? What if Ara couldn't heal him? There were so many 'what if's' that Dean's head spun. He tried not to think about it but they stayed in the back of his head.

He focused to steady his hands as he reached for the grace but it didn't really work. Especially not when he thought about the fact that he technically held Cas in his hands. And that he was about to give him to another. And that was such a stupid thought that it immediately sobered Dean. This wasn't Cas. Not anymore. The soul was Cas now and if he could believe him, he would always belong to Dean.

So it was not a problem to give the grace to Ara. He laid the little but very bright light on Ara's chest and it immediately sunk into him. Ara gasped and then his whole body lit up. The light dimmed again after a few seconds but other than that nothing happened and Dean got a bit dizzy.

Sam checked for live signs again but he shook his head. So Ara didn't make it. That meant he had to save Cas. Dean took some bandages and a needle with thread to stitch him back up but before he reached Cas Ara sat up. He placed the bullet next to him and looked at Dean. "Cas' grace saved my life."

"That is great and everything but could you please move your ass over here to heal him?" Ara smiled a bit and came over to Cas. He gently laid two fingers on his forehead and the wound closed instantly. "He will not wake just yet. But don't worry, he will survive."

That took some weight from Dean's shoulders but it didn't really reassure him that Cas was fine.

"So his grace really did it, yeah?", Sam asked and Ara turned to him. "Yes. I am a full angel once again." Well at last that had worked out alright.

Dean looked at Cas and laid his hand on his cheek. He felt warm to the touch. Maybe he was just sleeping. After all there was still the sedative in him. "We should move him to your room. He can rest there."

"Yeah. You go and open the doors", Dean answered and made clear that he would be the one who carried Cas. He swooped him up bridal style and carefully navigated to their room. He gently laid him down and moved the cover over him. Then he sat next to the bed.

"You want something to eat?", Sam asked.

"No", Dean dismissively said and then it dawned to him that Sam also worried. "Thanks", he said gentler, "but not right now. Later okay?" Sam nodded and then hovered around a bit longer. "You can wait here, too, if you want."

Sam smiled gratefully and sat down on a chair. "He will wakeup Dean. It's just the sedative." "Yeah, maybe. We'll see."

Five hours later Cas was still unconscious.

Dean hadn't moved an inch and except for the fact that Sam got a book to read he hadn't either. So they were both startled when someone knocked on the door. Dean sprang into action immediately, ready to defend Cas from whatever came through that door but it was only Ara.

"I brought you food. I thought you would be hungry by now", he said and showed them a bag with burgers. Dean was pretty sure he couldn't eat anything but he appreciated the thought. Ara placed the burgers next to Sam. "Shall I check on him again?", he asked Dean. "Yes, please."

Ara came to the bed and laid his hand on Cas forehead. "His soul is mending. He should wake soon."

"His soul is mending? Did I hurt it?"

"Well, yes, of course you did." Dean had to sit down again. "You cut something off that was merged. The soul needs to close that hole. But it's fine." Dean really wanted to punch Ara for giving him such a scare. "So he'll heal? And there will be no permanent damage?" Ara looked at him. "I believe so. But the soul is a very delicate thing. We have to wait until he wakes up. Only then will we know for sure."

And again this was not really what he wanted to hear. "No offense, Ara, but why don't you shut the fuck up?"

"I apologize. I thought you wanted to hear the truth."

"I did. I just didn't want it to be so blunt", Dean said, tired from being afraid and scared. "There's no way to euphemize it." "I know. It's just…sorry. I know you meant nothing by it."

Sam interrupted before either of them could go on . "What are you going to do, Ara? Are you going back to heaven?" He shook his head. "I don't think so. They abandoned me when my need was dire and I feel no wish to reconcile with them." Sam seemed to agree with that and Dean couldn't argue with that either.

"So what are you gonna do?" Ara shrugged. "Stay here, I believe. If you allow it, of course. Help people. I don't know yet." Sam stood up. "Of course you can stay here. That's not a question."

"Yeah", Dean added. "We owe you big time." "No you don't", Ara denied. "You saved my life. And not only this, you saved my existence and you risked Castiels' life for it and I will forever be grateful and help you wherever I can." "You don't have to. You really don't, but thanks anyway."

Ara nodded at Dean and then he turned to Sam. "I thought that maybe we should add some angel sigils. We could, maybe, exclude my name from them. I read some interesting literature about that." "And if not?", Sam said and was already walking towards the door. "Then I will knock on your front door in the future." Dean heard Sam laugh until they were too far down the corridor and he was alone with Cas.

He turned back to the bed and took Cas appearance in. He looked peacefully, really, like he was just sleeping but he hadn't moved a muscle since Ara healed him. And Dean didn't believe it was because of the sedative. That should've long worn off.

He tried not to worry too much but it didn't really work. He knew that he only way to know for sure how Cas was, was to wait until he woke up. But then thousand ideas of what could've gone wrong rushed through his head, one worse than the other.

He busied himself with rummaging through his things, organizing everything in a different way, only to change everything back but he always kept an eye on Cas.

So of course he saw when Cas moved. He just turned his head a bit but Dean noticed. He rushed over to the bed, taking Cas' hand in his and he felt how Cas tightened the grip. Only a second of pressure but he felt it. Cas rolled over to the side and curled up, not letting go of Dean's hand he held it close to his chest.

Dean carefully sat on the edge of the bed and now Cas looked a lot more like a man who was just asleep and it eased Dean to see that.

An hour or so later Sam came in to check on them. "How is he?" "Don't know, yet. But he moved and I think he is really sleeping now." "Good." Sam's gaze fell on the untouched burgers. "Dean, you have to eat something. It's no use if you pass out on us."

Dean technically knew that Sam was right but he really wasn't hungry. But he couldn't escape from his brother's gaze, so he finally gave in. "Fine. Pass me one." Sam strode over to him and only looked satisfied when Dean took his first bite. "We set up all the angel sigils and it looks like we could exclude Ara from them, so now we should really be safe." "That's great. Ara did a lot for us." "Yes, he did", Sam agreed.

They didn't speak again after that but Sam also didn't leave until Dean ate the whole burger. After Dean chewed on the last bite he went back to do whatever it was that he did with his free time and Dean was once again left alone with Cas.

He didn't stir another time and after a few more hours Dean carefully laid down next to Cas and fell asleep.

He woke up because someone was nudging him. When he opened his eyes he stared into blue ones.

"Hey," Cas said softly.

"Hey", Dean answered, voice thick.

"You did it", Cas smiled and nudged him fondly. "Looks like." Dean sat up a bit to get a better look at Cas. "How are you feeling?" Cas shrugged. "Fine, I guess. Tired and a bit raw. And empty."

Dean tightened his hold around Cas. "God, I'm so sorry." Cas placed a hand on his cheek. "Don't be. You did good."

"I hurt you. God you screamed and I….I wasn't sure I could do it."

"I know. I'm sorry I didn't tell you."

"You knew this would happen?" He couldn't' believe Cas. "Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because you would've refused to do it. I'm sorry but I needed you to do it. I never wanted Ara to cut the grace out."

"You lied to me", Dean said accusingly.

"When people really, really, want something, they lie", Cas said and smiled again. "You taught me that."

Dean remembered when he had told Cas that. It was so many years ago. "I didn't think you would ever learn that." He buried his face in Cas neck. "Are you really okay?", he asked into Cas' skin.

"Yes, Dean. I'm good. And fully human now. Everything went well." He stopped shortly "It did right? Arathiel did not die?"

Dean moved his head to look at Cas again. "He is okay. Full angel again."

Cas smiled. "I told you it would work."

"Yes, yes you did." He moved in to kiss Cas who responded eagerly. "I told you, you'd get to keep me", Cas breathed when they finally separated. "And I will not go anywhere. I will stay right here."

Dean smiled lasciviously. "Yeah, you better do."