After my brief hiatus, I am back! I'm still trying to get my shit together after being in the hospital back in March. It was a rather traumatizing experience. My depression and anxiety got bad enough that they determined I was a threat to my own life and I ended up in inpatient. Not much has changed, but I got some great character ideas! I met some really interesting people which will probably reflect into Gamzee's story! Here's chapter twenty... seven? Is this twenty seven? As always, thank you for reading, I love you all.

Dirk held Dave's hand in his, close to his lips. He whispered things against his skin, hoping he could hear him speak, feel the heat of his breath against his bruised flesh. He spent every day like this. Dirk liked to think that he was just sleeping and that Dave would dream about the things around him. So Dirk said painfully sweet things and tried to make everything better with words.

"You look better." He told him, pressing a kiss against his hand. "When are you going to wake up? I miss you." Dirk forced a grin and kissed him again.

There was another sudden disturbance in his vitals. Dave's heart rate began to raise and then fell again. A nurse came into check on him and logged the change. It was the same nurse that was there every day. She patted Dirk on the back.

"If you need something, let me know." She reminded him before leaving. He gave her a smile.

Dirk watched her leave and turn towards the nurse's station before turning his attention back to Dave. He wondered if he would wake up. It had been so long since he had heard his voice… Dirk wished that it would have been him instead, that at least he deserved it. Dave didn't deserve this.

Dirk hadn't heard from Jake at all except for a text that he had sent to let him know he had survived. Dirk stared at the text and sighed with relief. He put this phone aside and turned his attention back to Dave.

"John's funeral is tomorrow." He said softly, sadly. "I bought flowers for the both of us – roses and lilies. They're the prettiest flowers I've ever seen… They'll be the biggest bouquets there." He was met with silence. He wasn't sure what he expected. He sighed heavily. "The nurses said that even when he was suffering he was still worried about you, that he kept asking if you were alright." Dirk scoffed. "That's John for you. He was crazy about you."

Dirk looked at the time and figured that he should get back to the hotel, shower, check on Jake and rest up for tomorrow. He kissed Dave on the forehead. "See you tomorrow, bro."

Time seemed to move a little slower. It felt like it took hours to get back to the hotel, another hour to strip off his clothes and hours to shower. Dirk got lost in time as he blow dried his hair. He stared at his reflection blankly, into his own dead eyes looking for his soul. That's when Jake called him. Dirk didn't answer the phone, figured all his questions would be answered the next day at the funeral home when they would see each other at John's service. But then he called again and then again until Dirk couldn't bare it any longer.

"Jake, I-"

"You left me to die." An emotionless voice cut him off. There was silence between them. Cold, awkward silence… Jake continued. "I would have died if you knew how to tie a knot for shit… I didn't call to bitch at you, though…" He stated weakly.

Dirk's heart was pounding. He sounded so sick, so beat that he no longer sounded like himself. He had no spunk or enthusiasm, no energy for sarcasm. Jake coughed and Dirk cringed. It sounded as if one of his lungs was caught in his throat. Dirk spoke with care, "Jake, maybe you should call me later…" He advised him.

"N-No! No." Jake waited for his body to settle again before speaking. "I called to thank you." He said in the same empty tone. Something in his voice indicated sincerity but he wasn't sure what.

Dirk sat in stunned silence for a while before responding. "You what?"

"I wouldn't have done anything to save myself if you hadn't left me to fight. I understand why you did what you did."

Tears of relief streamed down Dirk's face. "Are you alright?!" Dirk whimpered with a strained, apologetic voice.

Jake chuckled. "I'm still living. I'm okay. I'm just in a lot of pain but I can't complain, man."

Dirk jumped. "The pills! You're taking the pills aren't you?"

"Yes, of course…. Go to bed, Dirk. We're both going to need our rest." Jake hung up without another word.

Dirk smiled for the first time in a long, long time.

~ o0o ~

Everyone from the company was there. Everyone had loved John dearly – the photographers, the actors, the film editors. Karkat and Sollux sat in the front row with Dad. Karkat balled his eyes out and eventually slumped over into Sollux's lap and cried some more. Dad tried to do exactly what his nickname implied and be a strong, father figure that would put good spirits into everyone but eventually… well… a man could only be so strong.

Jake sat in the back and quietly watched. He lined out speakers and a track list for the service, made a slide show and even ordered catered comfort food. Mid-service, Dirk slid in and found a spot next to him. Dirk looked over his expression carefully, assessing his stability before speaking.

"Hey…" he whispered. Jake opened his hand and took Dirk's in his, placing their entwined hands in his lap.

"Thanks for the flowers. He'd love them." Jake said softly.

Dirk nodded and sighed. "Didn't know you invited so many. Where's his parents?"

Jake pointed to the most self-pitying people in the room: a Korean couple, sobbing noisily in their native tongue, probably spouting some shit about how they'd always loved him. It ate Jake alive.

"They never even called him. They never sent him Christmas cards or came for holidays and now they want to act like they were the best parents, like they did nothing wrong."

Dirk squeezed his hand. "I know. I know…" He let Jake cry for as long as he needed to, holding him, wiping his tears and reminding him to breathe. Dad came over and tried to comfort him so that Dirk could take a break. As Dad approached, Dirk's phone began to buzz in his pocket. Dad motioned him to step out while he took his place.

Dirk went into the hall.

"Hello?"

"Dirk Strider?"

"That's me…"

"Hi! I just wanted to inform you that Dave has woken up! He's a little out of it, real confused, but he wants to talk to you."

Dirk dropped to his knees and clutched his chest. "H-He woke up? He's really awake? Right now?"

The nurse let out a light chuckle. "Yes sir! I'm assuming you'll be here soon?"

"Give me ten minutes, ma'm."