Disclaimer: The Naruto Universe is the property of Masashi Kishimoto. My delays make George R R Martin's look reasonable by comparison.

Day One Patched!

Day 2

Clone #361

Clone #361 was one of the dozens that had materialized in the surrounding tree branches. There simply wasn't enough room on the ground below; a veritable sea of yellow, orange and spots of blue covered the road and forest floor. Despite only existing for mere seconds, he and the others knew exactly what to do. All that stood in their way were two jonin.

"Try not to kill them."

Tsunade had only been half-joking but as Mizuki had found out to his detriment, having this many clones converging on you was not something to be taken lightly. Naruto knew from the start of the chunin exams that one of the gatekeepers had some kind of reality-warping genjutsu. The other's abilities he could only guess at. This first step would have to be done quickly.

The front line of the clone 'army' had already sprinted far enough to close half the distance, with the rest of ground clones not far behind. Clone #361 and the others in the trees leaped from branch to branch, aiming for the ones closest to the gates where support from the air might prove crucial. From up high he could see the two jonin wasting no time. The one with the long and wild hair had summoned the weirdest looking weapon he'd ever seen - some kind of clam or shell thing - that looked very unwieldy. It had to be bulkier and heavier than he was.

His partner - the one with the bandana - was already going through hand seals. None of the clones were near enough to stop him finishing.

"Suiton, Syrup Capturing Field!"

The jonon sucked in breath deeply for a second, and then from his mouth burst forth a torrent of a pale, gooey looking liquid.

Urgh.

Arcing high, the substance landed directly at the feet of the clone front runners, splashing up and covering their bodies in the goo. A few fell over head-first from the momentum of being stopped so suddenly. The liquid spread along the ground, trapping the feet of more and more clones. The entire front line had been stopped in it's tracks, and the rest were simply crashing in the backs of those in front. More than a few 'pops' of clones dematerializing were heard as they drifted back into the ether.

"Uzumaki Naruto! Halt and cease your advance!" yelled the jonin with the shell mace. "By order of the village of Konoha, you are forbidden from entering. Turn around and leave or we'll be forced to fight the real you in there."

Ha! Shows how much they know, yeah!

Clone #361 and the other tree leapers reached the final branches, almost in line with the gatekeepers. A gap of around ten metres still separated them from the ground clones. If the jonin noticed the ones here in the trees, they hadn't shown it. The one with the bandana was now gripping a kunai in his left hand.

"Really?! Did Granny Hokage order you guys that?!" yelled one of the trapped clones.

"Hai!" a couple other clones joined in.

"Orders are orders Naruto. Go back to the Hokage so we don't have to fight. You know she wouldn't want this." the one with the kunai called out.

"That's where you're wrong!" A slow smirk grew on every one of the Naruto faces.

Suddenly dozens of clones from the middle of the pack burst upwards and forwards. Using the heads of those in front as stepping stones, they leaped forward, enough to clear the still spreading sticky goo. Recovering on the ground while yet more clones behind mimicked the menoeuvre, they charged again.

Now's the time!

"Granny Hokage ordered me to do this!" Clone #361 bellowed, before leaping with the other tree clones towards the gate. If the surprise from yet more clones appearing wasn't enough to distract them, that little revelation surely was.

It seemed to work. The goo hurling gatekeeper paled for just a second before attempting to use his jutsu again. It was a second too late. As he heaved another breathe inwards, the first of the running clones barreled into him.

"Izumo!" The other jonin grimaced and swung in front, easily connecting with a clone about to do the same to him. He looked up, easily overwhelmed by the number of still more clones sailing from the trees. Clone #361 and some others were already passing him. Meeting his eyes briefly, the clones saw him turn his attention to the hundreds of clones bearing down from the road. Izumo had freed himself with his kunai and also stood, prepared to fight on.

For #Clone 361, the way was open. He was right in front of the gate! With the others alongside him, he charged forward with electric intent. The bright streets of Konoha beckoned.

That was easier than I thought it'd be! Now to find-

For the millisecond before vanishing, Clone #361 experienced the unfortunate feeling of running directly into a solid wall at full sprint.

Clone #99

Clone #99 reached into his pocket and pulled out a length of rope, chucking it to his fellow clone currently in the process of tying up an gagged Izumo. Every clone had one since the first had taken one from Tsunade's cart. This was the purpose, to ensure the two gatekeepers wouldn't cause further trouble while the rest of the clones carried out the plan inside the village.

The fight had been brief and blunt. After watching a dozen clones mindlessly sprint headfirst into the walls either side of the archway - which had to be due to a genjutsu of some kind - Clone #99 and the others he had charged with had simply overwhelmed the two jonin. They'd certainly knocked down the clone numbers by at least twenty thanks to skillful fighting, but neither were seemingly adept at the up-close combat style Naruto specialised in. The sheer numbers tipped the scales far too much in the clones' favour anyway.

Izumo was now joining his partner in an extended break, tied up to separate trees a fair distance from the gate. Apart from Clone #99 and the few that had stayed behind to deal with the jonin, the rest of the clones had piled into Konoha unopposed - including the ones freed from the syrup jutsu. Hundreds had made it through, surely one more clone wouldn't make a difference?

"You guys good here? I'm gonna scout around the walls." he said.

"Hai, they're not going anywhere. What for?" the other clone replied, not noticing the evil glares Izumo shot at him.

"Just wanna. Make sure they don't escape, baka!"

"We won't. Don't fall out a tree, baka!"

Clone #99 leapt into the nearest tree grinning, looking back briefly to see the others doing the same, and shot away into the branches.

Staying relatively close to the walls on his left, he fell into the automatic motions of tree leaping. His actual destination was the Hokage Monument, and skirting around the village's outskirts seemed like the safest route. It wasn't like he could trust any of the other clones inside the village to get there what with likely every ninja out to get them. No, he would be the one to fulfil Naruto's wish, for he was a clone summoned out of the original's desire to see the village from above once more. While he still could. And then he would jump from the mountain without fear, knowing that as a clone he could do nothing more. What else could he do, wait to be dispelled?

Landing on another branch, the clone thought to the parchment inside his pocket. No-one would read this one.

Unless I did...

The temptation was there for sure. Surely there wasn't any harm in a doomed clone reading whatever Tsunade had written.

Eyes on the next tree, he leaped forward. Then again, there wasn't much point in a doomed clone reading it to begin with.

Not like I'm gonna be able to pass anything on. May aswell keep the promise to Granny, yeah.

Brushing the thoughts aside, he realised he'd absent-mindedly ploughed straight ahead instead of following the curve of the wall. He was about to divert left when something caught his eye on the forest floor.

Huh?

What looked to be a very overgrown pathway was faintly visable snaking it's way through the forest. It was barely anything more now than a dirt track. Indeed the clone wondered if it was even visable from ground level. Whatever the case, he'd never seen it before, and chose out of curiosity to allocate five minutes for seeing if it led anywhere.

After three, he spotted it did. A large building loomed ahead in a clearing. Making sure to jump down from a height that wouldn't result in broken ankles, the clone stared at the structure from the trees' edge.

It looked like an abandoned temple. It definitely had the architectural style of the Fire Temple which Naruto had seen illustrations of. The clone guessed it wasn't in use anymore as nature was slowly taking back the land; overgrown weeds and flowers littered the ground around the structure while vines curled upwards along the walls. Not only that, part of the roof had caved in, and some of the wooden support beams over the entrance looked dangerously creaky. He could see cracks everywhere.

However, the feature that caught the clone's primary attention was the symbol above the front entrance - a large and familiar spiral.

No way...is that...MY spiral?

It had to be a coincidence. Nonetheless, if there was any doubt about going inside before, it was gone now. Clone #99 simply had to see what was inside. Maybe he'd get an answer to why this temple had the exact same symbol as the one adorning the back of his jumpsuit.

Stepping forward gingerly, the clone proceeded inside, the chirps of nature replaced by silence peppered with classic sounds of a building threatening to collapse in on itself. With every step, he got an increasing feeling he shouldn't be inside here.

Please...don't let it be haunted...don't let it be haunted...please don't let there be ghosts...

The entrance hall led to a large room - probably the central one of the temple - where the old inhabitants must have gathered for meetings. Light streamed in from gaps in the high roof, including the gaping hole the clone had seen outside. The floor was ruined and rotten, having been subjected to constant water damage. The clone walked over this towards the back of the room, attention caught by the feature against the far wall. For there stood a bizarre sight. Underneath a battered cloth curtain and yet more spiral symbols was the creepiest collection of masks the clone would undoubtedly ever see. About thirty evil looking faces stared back into the room, hung up to form a show of downright spooky.

Thinking these masks might give him a clue as to what this temple was about, he took a step closer. Instantly he got the feeling he was being watched. Almost afraid to look, the masks seemed to change. Were they really that demonic looking?

A rising feeling told him he should get the hell out of there. And it was rapidly overwhelming the want to take away one of the masks.

What if they all come alive and attack me?!

His last look at the wall was noticing one of the faces on the top line apparently looking right at him. After a few seconds, the room was empty of presence once more. The clone never once looked back.

Clone #12

Clone #12 had been one of the unfortunate ones caught in the syrup, and had therefore missed being the first back into Konoha. That honour had gone to clone #82, the lucky bastard. Shoving away the thoughts of getting revenge for him for that and for trampling on his head to get over the sticky goo, clone #12 focused on looking around for anyone he knew. Kakashi was the absolute must-find of this mission, Tsunade had stressed that if just one person had to read the parchment, it was him. Unfortunately, as Naruto had found out back in his early team 7 days, his sensei was never where you expected him to be at any time. No-one seemed to know where the man even lived for goodness sake.

To make sure, the clones had formulated a strategy once inside the village. Simply - every area of the village was to be covered until Kakashi was found. Then they could prioritise other people. That part of Tsunade's plan covered finding members of the prominent clans and sharing the parchment with them. And of course, Naruto's link to them was through the rookies.

Clone #12 was heading to the west side of Konoha, hoping to look around some of the training grounds. At the very least, it was a guaranteed bet that Rock Lee would be training there with Might Guy. If the other two members of Team Guy were present, even better.

He was sticking to the rooftops while running, though he'd noticed other clones tearing through the streets down below. So far - apart from odd glances of people naturally not used to seeing dozens of him running about - his village 'invasion' had gone down pretty quietly. Really it was disappointing. Would it last though? Probably not.

About to leave the rooftops behinds for the more scenic areas, the clone caught sight of instantly recognisable pink hair down below in the road.

Sakura-chan...!

She wasn't alone.

...and Neji?

Jumping down a good ten metres away, the clone saw them both clearly in conversation. For him it was a very odd pairing - had they even spoken before? About to move closer, Neji spotted him. And then, noticing his focus broken, Sakura turned around.

It was the most awkward pause the clone would ever experience.

"Naruto!"

Whatever short memories of her running over were knocked out by the gripping hug she gave him.

"Not...so...hard...Sakura-chan...I'm...a clone..." he managed to wheeze out.

"What?" She moved her head back from his shoulder and stared at him.

"Naruto...what's going on?" Neji asked as he walked over, his featureless eyes transfixed by something behind them. He looked tired and dishevelled, his clothes and hair mattered with dirt.

The clone turned to see a group of his fellows in the distance charging down a main street. A couple broke off and ran towards the threesome.

"Ohayo Sakura-chan!" they both called, grinning madly with hearts in their eyes.

"Get lost, I found her first! Keep looking for others!" Clone #12 yelled back.

Grunting, the two hurtled past - waving as they did so - in the direction of the training grounds.

"You're...you're all clones? Where's Naruto?" Sakura asked expectantly, hands still gripping the jumpsuit.

"He uh...he's not here. We're here on a mission from Granny Hokage...oh wait! I need to give you this." he replied, rummaging into his pocket. Sakura let go of his clothes, a look of utter bafflement plastered over her face.

"Oh! Hinata-sama, is she with you? She's safe?" Neji practically shunted Sakura aside to get his question in. He looked close to losing his typical cool.

"Hai hai! She didn't tell you?" The clone pulled out the parchment. Sakura eyed it suspiciously.

"No...she lied to me." His frown deepened. "It's not like her at all."

"Well actually I think Granny Hokage kinda kidnapped her. She said something about...uh...making sure her otousan doesn't do anything stupid." the clone replied before handing over the parchment to Sakura with a smile. She opened it and began reading.

"Hiashi-sama? So Hinata-sama wants to come back but cannot?"

"Uh...maybe...I hadn't really thought about it like that..." clone #12 folded his arms and copied Neji's frown.

"This is...I'm...you're..."

Both boys glanced at Sakura who looked like she was gripping onto the parchment for dear life. She was staring wide-eyed at Naruto's clone.

"You've...you've read this? This...is all true..?" she stuttered. Usually she only went through such a rapid shift of emotion when Naruto asked her on a date.

"Ah! No!" the clone spluttered, theatrically shielding his eyes. "I'm not supposed to know what's in there, Granny Hokage made me swear not to look." He paused, and delivered his next sentence in a uncharacteristicallly serious tone. "She wants you to copy down whatever's in there and get it to the clan heads. And Kakashi-sensei, that's who most of us are looking for.

"Sensei...I haven't seen him today..."

The clone really didn't like the look Sakura was giving him. Her eyes seemed glazed over like a zombie; he almost wanted to back away slowly.

"As soon as possible since that parchment's part of the kage bunshin. It'll only last as long as I do." he continued. "Neji, can you get this one to the Hyuugas?"

"Hai. May I read it first?" Neji asked Sakura. Not getting a reply, he simply took it out of her hands. She offered no resistance.

"Well I'm supposed to go hide now until the original stops the jutsu. I'm glad I got to see you Sakura-chan, yeah!" Clone #18 said, flashing her the biggest grin he could muster. Of all the copies, he had been the one to talk to Sakura, and to him that made his brief existence completely worthwhile.

"Hai..." she replied, still appearing as though she was looking right through him.

"Good luck! And to you Neji."

The genin had his eyes glued halfway down the parchment as the clone turned to leave. Throwing a goodbye hand gesture behind him, he dashed back the way he'd come. He thought he heard a faint shout behind him but didn't stop to check, every moment now was critical. If he disapperated before those two had the chance to copy the contents, it would risk the validity of Tsunade's orders. After all, it wasn't just Sakura and Neji who had to pass on the messages, and if there were any conflictions...

Eh, they'll be fine. I just have to do my part! Now...where would be a good place to hide...

Twenty five minutes later, clone #18 finally came within reach of his apartment. Numerous detours and close calls on the way over resulted from the ANBU as expected ultimately emerging and dispatching the clones one by one. So far he'd seen or heard at least thirty Narutos dismissed. It was a matter of time now - the more ANBU that joined the hunt, the less time the clones had.

Dearly hoping his compatriots had found Kakashi, clone #18 made his last jump over to his old apartment complex.

No-one will ever think to look here, yeah!

In midair at the apex of his leap, there was no way to avoid the thrown kunai that connected with the base of his neck. He never saw it coming.

Clone #135

Having spent more time that he'd have liked expaining everything to Team Ten, clone #135 nervously glanced over his shoulder. Everything seemed to be relatively safe out here in Training Ground 5, but on the way over he'd seen the ANBU coming out in force, and now surely he was working against the clock. For now at least, the clones he had come with were signalling the all-clear, acting as lookouts near the edge of the clearing.

"So I presume you have these orders then?"

Asuma's calm voice lured his attention back to the group. The man had barely reacted to seeing an exiled kid interrupt his team's training, and even now after the explanation still looked decidedly non-plussed. If anything, clone #135 guessed he was enjoying the break from teaching his students, watching him light up enough cigarette. No wonder Naruto had never heard Shikamaru complain about him - they were practically twins of temperament.

"Hai." he replied, taking the parchment and handing it to the jonin. Asuma casually unfurled it and began reading.

His three students were all giving clone #135 odd looks. None of them had said very much since he'd got there. Choji looked dumbfounded - plain and simple. Ino couldn't decide if she wanted to stare at him or at her sensei. Shikamaru closed his eyes and furrowed his brow.

"Well..." Asuma started, taking a deep puff of tobacco with his eyes scanning the top of the page. "Congratulations on joining Shikamaru here as chunin." He looked at the clone with a twinkle in his eye.

"Aw gee...thanks...I didn't do much for it though..." clone #135 replied, rocking back and forth on his heels. This sensation of approval was such a strange feeling.

"Wow really? You too?!" Choji gaped. Ino suddenly looked furious.

"WHAT?! How the heck did that happen?!"

"Sheesh."

All eyes turned to Shikamaru, now looking at the clone again.

"You have a real knack for causing troublesome situations, you know?"

"Aheheheh, yeah." the clone answered, grinning. "Uh...don't tell me anything else in there Asuma-sensei. Granny Hokage's orders."

"Mmm...is that so?" His eyes returned to the parchment, reading down.

Clone #135 turned and waved over to his fellow lookouts. Sticking three fingers out, a trio of clones rushed over to join them, handing a parchment each to the students of Team Ten. Quickly, they hurried back to their temporary posts.

"So these are for our parents, right?" Ino asked.

"Hai, the sooner the better."

"Can we go sensei?"

Asuma looked down at the questioning Shikamaru.

"You're the chunin, what do you think?" the jonin replied, giving him a knowing nod.

"Heh. Let's go, Ino, Choji."

"Mm!"

"Hai!"

"And Naruto..." Shikamaru walked up to stand by him. "It's good to be able to see you again. We all thought...well..."

"I'm fine, Shikamaru." Clone #135 placed his hand on the other chunin's shoulder and smiled. "Don't worry about me."

Shikamaru's beady eyes opened up wider. The beginnings of a smile formed.

"We won't let you down."

"Never." agreed a clearly determined Choji.

"You're still an idiot, but you bet my otousan's gonna see this." Ino said, a new found spring in her step. "Whoever drove you and Tsunade-sama away is gonna pay."

Did Team Ten really think so much of Naruto? Maybe the original should have spent more time hanging out with these three!

After they'd headed off towards Konoha proper, clone #135 turned back towards the jonin. Asuma had rolled the parchment back up and looked to be puffing up the last half of his cigarette in record time.

"I better go and hide now." the clone said stretching after an awkward few moments.

"Mm...if only I'd had the liberty of reading the last set of orders I was given." He flicked away the stub.

"Huh?"

This guy better not be as cryptic as Kakashi-sensei.

"I was ordered to deliver the request for you to be exiled, to the capital. I'm sorry. I had no idea about it until after I returned and you'd already gone."

If he wasn't on an exceedingly important mission at the time, clone #135 might've had more to say at Asuma's statement. As it was, he remained focused on his priorities.

"Forget about it. I gotta go, you can take care of your parchment, yeah?"

"Mm...sure can. You're a good kid Naruto. I wish I could've taught you someday." Asuma said, breaking out into a small smile. The clone returned a bigger one back.

"Hah! Whatever you say, Asuma-sensei."

And with that, he took off, deeper into the woods, followed by the lookouts.

Half an hour later, clone #135 plunged towards the ground, after a tree-top argument among the clones about boredom got slightly out-of-hand.

"Well this sucks", he thought, just before his skull connected with the hard earth.

Clone #508

"What do you mean you're 'taking care of Hinata'?! You bastard!"

"Ahh! Easy Kiba, easy!"

Apparently clone #508 had underestimated the young Inuzuka's bond with his female teammate and thus maybe should've chosen his words with more care. Or perhaps Kiba was simply using the opportunity to get some revenge for his chunin exam defeat. Either way, the clone shot a panicked look at the striking jonin standing close by. He dreaded to think what would happen if the genin's fangs got any closer to his face.

"That's enough Kiba. Let it go. It's a clone don't forget."

"IT?! Hey!"

"Even as a clone you're still far too loud." growled Kiba, reluctantly releasing the clone's jumpsuit collar with both hands. Akamaru whined depressingly atop Kiba's hood having obviously not enjoyed the sudden movement.

"I have to agree." said Shino, looking utterly unflappable at the sight of multiple Narutos. "But I deduced immediately that your statement regarding Hinata was innocent."

"Uhh...right, yeah!"

"May we see these orders?" Kurenai asked him.

He signalled over two clones acting as scouts at the edge of their location - Training Ground 8.

"Just read them, copy them, then get them to your families. Don't read anything off of it to any of me." he explained, handing his cloned copy to the jonin while his fellows gave theirs to the genin.

"We saw you threatening him! What's the big idea eh?!" clone #491 yelled at Kiba. The accused glared right back.

"Oi...I'm just worried about Hinata is all!" he replied. "Where are you guys at anyway?"

"We were at Otafuku but we've moved on. I dunno if I'm allowed to say where to though..." Clone #508 paused and scratched the back of his head.

"Don't worry. That's more than enough information for us." Kurenai smiled, evidentially in no hurry to read her parchment. Shino was already nose-deep in his. "I only wish we could pass on our support to Hinata."

As useful as kage bunshin was and continued to be, telepathy among the clones was sadly not included in the jutsu description. Clone #508 hoped that maybe the original would work on something like that when he learned more about inventing and improving jutsus.

"Are you sure the Hokage knows what she's doing?" Kiba asked him.

"Hai! At least...I think so..."

"Excuse me." Shino looked up. "You intend for all of the clans to read these, correct?"

The clone did everything in his power to try and read something - anything - into Shino's monotone question. He failed spectacularly.

"Pretty much!"

Shino just stared at him. Nothing in his body language moved at all. A category 5 hurricane would not have moved this boy at full strength. Out of nowhere, a very slight buzzing sound began to grow steadily louder. And then Shino looked down at the parchment in his hands again.

"Interesting."

"What is it? What's in there?" Kiba made a grab for Shino's copy.

"Read your own."

"Uh...what...oh...hai..." He pulled back and sheepishly unwound his own parchment while Akamaru face-planted down into the hood.

"I'm afraid we should call this to a close." Kurenai stated to them all. "I don't want Kiba or Shino implicated in any of this, and we can't assist you further than delivering these. The ANBU are surely on the move."

"No worries! I'm an expert at stealth and hiding, yeah!" exclaimed clone #508.

"Hai!" his fellow mimics agreed.

The three members of Team 8 gave each other and him incredulous looks.

"Of course."

"Riiiight."

"..."

"Well then...you two. Report to your families and continue with your regular exercises until next time." Kurenai ordered.

"Hai, sensei." Shino wasted no time in moving away.

"Mm! And Naruto, if the real you doesn't keep Hinata safe until we get her back, he's dead!" Kiba yelled before sprinting off.

"Hai hai!" the clone called after him.

"Good luck."

"Oh uh..."

Clone #508 didn't manage to finished his sentence as Kurenai made a seal and was engulfed rapidly in a whirl of dancing leaves before vanishing in the wind. He swore he just saw a smile on the jonin's face.

Guess that's that.

"Where're we hiding then? The forest?" clone #491 asked.

"You two can. We should split up, so I'm gonna head..." he closed his eyes and spun around, then pointed in a random direction. "...that way!"

A short while later, clone #508 neared the walls of Konoha. South-east was taking him back towards the main gate. Several near-misses and alleyway escapes had delayed his progress; maybe hiding in the trees had been the better choice after all. Nevertheless, he was out of options. Less and less clones were acting as distractions for the ANBU, and turning back would be certain suicide for the bunshin. His new and only plan now was to check up on the clones watching over the gatekeepers.

Silently thankful that no-one appeared to be watching the archway, the clone dashed from the cover of a nearby building and went underneath it. Turning left, he looked for the tied-up jonin among the trees.

"Guys? Hey!"

Strange. I could've sworn they weren't this far in.

Taking one last look around, clone #508 suddenly double-taked as the two gatekeepers stepped out from behind separate tree trunks.

"You've got five seconds to tell us if you're the real Naruto or not."

Completely freaked out by the fearsome looks on their faces, he spun around and ran. He'd take his chances with the ANBU.

Leaping back out from the trees, he was about to hurtle back into the village before noticing a certain kunoichi casually leaning against the wall. The way she handled the kunai in her hands disturbed the clone on many fundamental levels. He knew from past experience that this woman was nightmare-inducing.

"Oh hello there." Anko purred, straightening up. "Let's play a little game, shall we?"

Damnit! Whymewhymewhymewhymewhyme...

Clone #444

He'd seem some bad things in his time. Far too many different and discomforting ways one could dispatch of a clone. Whoever taught the ANBU clearly knew their ninja stuff. And if that wasn't bad enough, clone #444 was pretty sure he was being stalked. His current position on the stairs right underneath the Hokage monument wasn't exactly tenable but it was better than out in the open streets, plus it gave him a good view in three directions.

The only question now was whether that lone ANBU ninja he'd seen following him on the way over would show up.

Gazing out over the railing across the village, the clone looked for any sign of danger, or the errant Hatake Kakashi. It must've been at least an hour since the invasion and to his knowledge the masked shinobi had still not been located. With the number of clones remaining rapidly decreasing, the time left for him and his fellow clones couldn't be more than another hour.

He sighed. It was truly time for a miracle. So he looked up in the direction of the Fourth's face for any kind of inspiration.

"GAAHH!"

That damn ANBU shinobi stood horizontally from the rock, staring directly down into his eyes, no more than ten feet away. Without a second panicked thought, clone #444 pelted down the stairs - intending to make a dash for the Hokage Tower. Not only was it the nearest building but naturally the office would be empty and might make for a good hiding spot.

Turning at the foot of the steps, the clone was about to sprint for it, until the ANBU calmly dropped in his path, before standing up.

Oh Gods, I'm dead...I'm so dead...

Now in the sunlight, the details of his grey uniform made his imposing nature no less intimidating. He wasn't especially tall but those thick and partly exposed arms could likely do serious damage. Fortunately he had so far made no attempt to reach for the blade sheathed on his back. The creature motif of his mask didn't look like any obvious animal - the ears were cat-like but the markings were unlike anything the clone knew. The fat red semi-circles around the eyes did nothing to alleviate his fear. Even amongst the ANBU, clone #444 guessed this was not a man to be messed with. All that left him with just one reasonable course of action:

Surrender.

"Take it! Take the parchment! I don't want it anymore!" he yelled, throwing the bound paper at the ANBU's feet.

The man stared behind the mask at him for a second, then leaned down to pick up the parchment. As he appeared to read it, clone #444 ever-so slowly tilted his head left and right. Both ways were technically open to run in and attempt an escape but something told him this man wouldn't let him run ten feet before taking him down.

If only the original was here, yeah. More clones would be a blessing right...now...wait a sec...if clone #1 could do it, I can too! D'oh!

"Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!"

One more clone can't hurt...woah...

The new bunshin immediately started to run to the left but it was clear already something was wrong. The ANBU ninja looked up and readied himself defensively but watched on along with clone #444 as the fresh arrival stumbled and fell, sweating profusely. Connecting with the hard earth, he poofed out of existence.

Nynngh...what happened...

Clone #444 felt awful...like all the energy had been sapped right out of his body. Failing in the battle to stay on his feet, his knees collapsed and only a fast arm support stopped him following the new clone's demise via ground face-plant. He'd spoken way too soon; this did hurt. Alot. It took most of his focus just to keep from blacking out. Was this what chakra depletion felt like?

Hearing a noise, he achingly raised his head to see the parchment floating down to land on the ground right in front of him. The ANBU ninja had let it go and, in a measure of seemingly absolute indifference, proceeded to disappear in a whirlwind of leaves.

Well...great? Urgh...

The fires in his joints spread; there wasn't a bone in his body that didn't want to collapse onto the floor. Desperate to find something or someone to help him, he crawled an arm's length forward. The parchment was now within reach. It was open. And his name was among the numerous words. So was Sakura's.

He couldn't help it. Reading was all he had any energy left to do. Moving was out of the question.

His eyes only just made it to the bottom of the page before closing for good. Any reactionary thoughts were snuffed out by unconsciousness...and then nothing.

The following new laws, declared and signed by The Fifth Hokage Senju Tsunade, are designated to go into immediate effect for Konohagakure no Sato of the Land of Fire.

1) I, Senju Tsunade, decree that Uzumaki Naruto, Hyuuga Hinata and Haruno Sakura are hereby promoted to the rank of chunin.

2) I, Senju Tsunade, decree that Uzumaki Naruto and Hyuuga Hinata are hereby appointed as my apprentices, alongside Kato Shizune, to join myself for an extended training exercise. I and my apprentices are also hereby pardoned of (if any) past crimes, and (if any) future obligations to Konohagakure no Sato. Any attempt to officially reinstate these apprentices back into the village will be done solely at the Hokage's satisfaction.

3) I, Senju Tsunade, decree that the currently absent Senju seat upon the council to be filled by Hayate Kakashi. Any attempt to make further changes to the council will be done solely at the Hokage's satisfaction.

4) I, Senju Tsunade, decree that the Forbidden Scroll of Seals, S-Rank summoning scrolls and other A-Rank and S-Rank scrolls relinquished from the Hokage Tower are to be considered the property of myself as Fifth Hokage and thus under my sole protection. Any attempts to return these items to the location and security of Konohagakure no Sato will be done solely at the Hokage's satisfaction.

5) I, Senju Tsunade, decree that Shimura Danzo to be prohibited from standing for any future position of Hokage of Konohagakure no Sato.

6) I, Senju Tsunade, decree the instant termination of the secret law regarding the parentage - hereby to be known freely as Namikaze Minato (The Fourth Hokage) and Uzumaki Kushina - of Uzumaki Naruto. Any past, present or future cases of shinobi breaking the old law are to be pardoned immediately.

Signed,

Senju Tsunade, Fifth Hokage of Konohagakure no Sato.

May the Will of Fire burn for all.

Clone #1

Clone #1 had never imagined the village in a state quite like this. Sure, there had previously been a great deal of outrage and confusion in the streets whenever one of the original's pranks went off particularly well - the classic Hokage Monument makeover came to mind - but this had to be knocking the scale up to eleven. In the aims of distraction, the majority of invading clones had knocked over stalls, riled up some of the more antagonistic shop keepers, stolen all sorts of food, the clone even thought he could see a rising column of smoke in the distance.

Jeez.

It had been quite impressive yet somewhat depressing seeing how quickly the villagers had organized a hate-mob, calling for the blood of Uzumaki Naruto. Ah well, if the original was going to be away for awhile then it didn't matter so much. They'd forgive him after a week or two...right?

On the plus side, the angry crowd had drawn more of the ANBU into crowd control roles, which meant less for bunshin hunting.

Clone #1 had managed to get to the east side of the village. For the last hour he'd searched on the way over and found no signs of his sensei. He had run into Konohamaru, which cheered them both up, before subsequently explaining the mission. The kid had cutely given the clone his support and blessing.

Now the sun was dropping lower in the sky and he was running out of building rooftops to leap on. From here to the edge of Konoha's borders was mostly woodland and he heavily doubted Kakashi would be lurking around in there.

Think! Where did he say he went before training?!

He remembered multiple excuses from the jonin but nothing specifically. The last rooftop loomed into view.

Crap crap crap...

He looked briefly over his shoulder for signs of danger. Nothing. So far he'd been extremely lucky. But any minute now the authorities would start combing outwards from the village centre. His long life - for a clone at least - was almost certainly approaching the end.

And then, leaping across the alleyway towards the final building, he saw the cemetery.

The original didn't have much cause to visit this part of the village and so had never really been to the graveyard more than a couple times. The names on the headstones did prove oddly fascinating though, as it was impossible to tell if any of the fallen had done heroic deeds in life or gone down in flames of glory. Thankfully it wasn't nighttime or he wouldn't have dared approaching. Many kids had spread realistic stories of the various ghosts that hung about, looking for innocent youngsters to steal souls off of. He shivered.

From above, Clone #1 had a clear view of the entire plot where the distant figure stood, apparently paying his respects. A relatively tall man with unmistakably distinguishable grey hair.

Kakashi-sensei!

Wasting no time, the clone jumped down and through the cemetery gates. He didn't care if running was disrespectful, every second counted now. Approaching the jonin, clone #1 could see he had his hands in his pockets and stood relaxed, like he'd been there a long time. The air really seemed still here.

"Kakashi-sensei!" he called, slowing to a slow walk. He reached into his pocket.

Kakashi turned around. Not even the mask could hide the look on his face.

"Naruto...?" He rubbed his eye with his fist.

"I have something for you. I think you'll like it."

TBC

Alternative Chapter Titles: None again. Deal with it.

Author Notes:

So 2013 was the year Britain finally got a summer that lasted longer than a week, and it turns out temperatures approaching the 30's are not ideal as writing conditions. So...yeah...apologies once again for the delay. Have the second-longest chapter yet to make up for it.

And it's still technically not done! It was getting so long I've chopped the end off and am sticking it as the opener for Chapter 8, which you will see before the end of July if I can help it.

At least the first fight scene appeared. Hooray! But it was extremely short and probably not well written. Boo! But there'll be more in the future. Yay!

The part with Konohamaru was intended to be longer but had to be cut due to time. Might expand it in the future if I feel like it.

Dark Serpent Cat - You win the Award for most consistent reviewer and you have a valid point with Naruto's "yeah" tic. From how I see it, considering I'm using "hai" as "yes", Naruto saying "yeah" should mean nothing at all, which fits his canon "-dattebayo" very well, as that has no literal translation! But it will be toned down (mostly).

Rixxel Stryfe - Jeez. Your reviews could rival some short stories in length. Still interesting though! And here are the Hokage Laws you were wondering about at last - I always intended them to be brought in abit later. I did take inspiration here from the existing MH stories but as you can probably see, my laws are likely the most interesting. I also foresaw your point about confusion with the chronology of each chapter while writing, which is why I have the "Day _" at the start of each to help out. Up til now: Chapters 1+2, 3+4, etc have been running roughly alongside each other.

Review, or I'll pair Naruto with Sasuke. Yes, in a romantic way. Don't make me do it.

Until next time!