So on a roll it hurts *laughs and falls over onto a pile of feathers* I love not having writer's block!

Silence met his words.

"Alec?" Magnus repeated, his voice softer. This time, he heard sniffling and stifled sobs. His worry escalated into near-panic.

"Alexander, are you okay?" he demanded.

"M-Magnus, please," he whimpered into the phone. "I n-need you. Please. I know you're mad at me but-but I need you. P-Please. C-Can you come over? Izzy wo-won't understand." He broke down into tears again.

"Calm down, Alec," Magnus soothed, stumbling into his shoes and jerking on his jacket with one hand. Which was more difficult than he expected. "I'll be there as soon as possible."

He snapped his phone shut, twisted his scarf around his neck, and took off out the door.

Chairman Meow mewed in lonliness and confusion as the door slammed shut.

.x.

He didn't meet Izzy as he tore through the Institute. Alec had given him the Angel's blessing, and the Institute was open to him to come and go as he pleased.

He almost missed Alec's room, but he skidded to an awkward halt, backtracked, and pushed open the door.

Alec was doubled over on the floor, face in his hands, trying but failing to stifle his crying. A knife lay against the wall on the other side of his bed. A plate of half-eaten pasta sat on the bed. His phone was on the ground, as was his shirt, jacket, and stele.

"Alec," Magnus whispered, walking to his (ex-)lover's side and kneeling. Alec looked up with big, dark eyes swimming with tears.

"Magnus," he sobbed, lurching forward and clinging to his shirt. Magnus pulled him into his embrace and held him tight. He stroked the Shadowhunter's back, just between his shoulder blades. Alec had had a panic attack once before, and now Magnus recognized the irregular, shockingly fast heartbeat, the jerky breathing, and choking sobs.

"Calm down," Magnus whispered. "It's okay, I'm right here. Take a few deep breaths and try to relax, babe. Just let it all out." Alec's fists clenched tighter in Magnus's t-shirt. "Calm down, can you do that? Just breathe slow, sweetheart. I'm right here, I'm not going anywhere, Shadow."

It took a while and some soft nothings, but Alec's sobs subisded into soft cries, then into sniffling and shaky breaths. He sat up a bit, his chest rising and falling irregularly. He kept his eyes averted, until they found the knife. He made a choked noise.

"I'm so dumb," he gasped out. "I-I thought-more pain would-would make it stop h-hurting. I-I-" He took in a few huge breaths and held one. Then he let it out slowly. "I would have killed myself."

Magnus cupped his cheek in one hand and kissed him.

It wasn't like their kiss in the subway tunnel. This one was gentle and soft, comforting and sweet. Alec seemed lost for a moment before he kissed back like he used to. His hands went to Magnus's neck, then around his back to knot in his shirt. He parted his lips just enough for Magnus to slip his tongue in. Alec went limp against his chest amd moaned, a tiny sound in his throat.

They kissed for a while before they broke apart. Alec was panting, his eyes brimming with more tears.

"I'm sorry for everything I said," Magnus said first. "I'm sorry. I should have given you a second chance. It hurt me so much to see you so scared and...in pain." He stroked Alec's hair back. "Can you forgive me?"

The last part was said in unison with the scared Shadowhunter. Magnus kissed away a tear that fell down his cheek.

"I love you, Alec."

"I love you too."

There was a pause.

"Magnus?"

"Yes, Shadow?"

"...Hold me."

"I am."

"Tighter."

Another pause.

"And kiss me."

"Of course."

A/N

This is the final chapter! I think it turned out beautifully, don't you? R&R if you please!