"Hello?"

"Yeah, hi, I'd like to order a medium sized pizza with cheese, peper-"

"Alex?"

"Huh? How do you know my name? I don't call that often-"

"Alex, how did you get this number?"

"What are you talking about? The phone book of course, now-"

"This number was in the phone book?"

"Okay look, I don't know who you are but seriously? What's with all these interruptions?"

"Alex, just answer the question."

"No. First tell me who you are."

"You called me, little Alex."

"…Yassen?"

"Correct, now answer my question."

"…you work at the pizza place now? Cause if you do I'm canceling my or-"

"No, little Alex, I do not work at the pizza place. That is why I want to know how you called this number."

"Alright let me check the number…oh."

"What?"

"I accidentally switched the last two digits."

"…"

"Yassen?"

*click*

"Hey Al, when's the pizza coming?"

"Never. Even if it does we are NOT eating it."

"What? Why?"

"I didn't call the pizza place."

"Why not?"

"I meant to but I mixed up the last two numbers."

"Okay, that explains why it wouldn't come..I guess, so why could it possibly come, and why would we not eat it?"

"I told you I mixed up the last two numbers right?"

"Okay…"

"Well I ended up somehow calling Yassen."

"…"

"Yeah…"

"So you called the pizza place.."

"Uh-huh…"

"..and mixed up the last two numbers…"

"So far so good…"

"…and managed to call the worlds deadliest assassin instead?"

"Basically."

"Dude. What the hell?"

"What?! It's not like I meant to!"

"Only you."

"Did the doorbell just ring?"

"Yeah, you should probably answer it."

"What? Why me?"

"I'm the guest dude."

"You practically live here."

"So? Go answer the door."

"Fine. Bastard."

"I heard that!"

"You were supposed to!"

"Answer the damn door!"

"Alright, alright. Hello-…Yassen?"

"Little Alex."

"Why are you here?"

"To kidnap you."

"What?! No! Run Tom!"

"Why? Is it Scorpia?!"

"No, it's Yassen."

"The assassin?"

"Why's he here?"

"To kidnap me apparently."

"Why?!"

"Good question. Hey Yassen, why are you trying to kidnap me?"

"I am not trying little Alex, I am succeeding."

"Yeah, yeah. But why?"

"You called a pizza place.."

"Yes."

"…and mixed up some numbers…"

"The last two, yeah."

"…and managed to call me. An assassin."

"Your point? Tom and I just had this conversation."

"At this rate, your luck will kill you before a mission does."

"Hey! I have a 100% success rate! Besides my luck isn't that bad."

"Yes it is!"

"Shut up Tom! No one asked you!"

"He's right you know."

"About what?"

"Your luck."

"Exactly whose side are you on?"

"Yours dude but, seriously, your luck is crap."

"It's kept e alive so far."

"Exactly, so far."

"So what? I should just LET the worlds most wanted kidnap me DON'T SHRUG IT OFF!"

"Hey man, whatever works."

"We are not having this conversation. I am not letting anyone kidnap me."

"No one said anything about you 'letting' them, little Alex."

"Yassen…"

"Don't make it harder than necessary Al."

"Damn it Tom! Let me go!"

"Sorry Al, but I think we both know you're better off with Yassen here."

"You cannot possibly believe that I am safer with an INTERNATIONALLY WANTED ASSASSIN than our GOVERNMENT."

"Alex, our 'government' are a bunch of candy asses that are never there when you need them, and with your luck, that's almost always. Yassen will have your back better than them, right Yassen?"

"That is correct Thomas."

"Dude, my name is Tom. Send me updates okay?"

"I will when I can."

"Thanks."

"Hello! Still here!"

"You should probably sedate him."

"What?! Tom you traitor!"

"Yes, I have a syringe here. Keep him still."

"OH BLOODy hel..l…"

"Is he out?"

"Yes."

"How long?"

"About eight hours."

"Thanks for your number. I needed to get him out, MI6 was killing him."

"You are a good friend, though I didn't expect a call so soon."

"Whatever works, right?"

"Indeed. I will call you once we reach Germany."

"Alright. Good luck, you'll need it."

"Thank you. I know I will."

*door closes*

"Oh, there's the phone book…wait. I haven't planted Yassen's number yet. Wow. He really does have the worst luck."