Disclaimers: I do not own the 39 Clues, or Leave Out All the Rest by Linkin Park.


Waking up this morning was a whole new feeling. Today felt like a day for a change. It was a day to set things right. A feeling that he hasn't experienced in decades.

He rubbed his fatigued eyes, the eyes that lack of energy and life. Those amber orbs had been energetic and ambitious once, but now, all traces of motivation have being washed out. He stretched , letting his sore muscles relax. A silver envelope tossed carelessly on the bamboo floor caught his eye. He tossed it there days before, but he never bothered to open it.

Because he knew what was inside.

The dreaded invitation had come. It came for across the Atlantic Ocean, from a small town in Massachusetts. He recalls holding the card in his hand. A slight pang to regret and angst stabbed his heart. He knew this day was coming. But he didn't prepare himself to face it.

I dreamed you were missing

You were so scared

But no one would listen

'Cause no one else cared

However, despite all the pain, he felt a bittersweet happiness swell inside. His love, the one that he could never have, deserved to get married. She deserved a man worthy of her attention.

Her compassionate heart never forgot anyone, even the ones that have hurt her. She had the heart to even send him an invitation. He would have never expected it.

He snatched the envelope and left it on his expensive mahogany desk. He threw on a crisp polo, which he paired with jeans. Jeans. Something so common and made of cotton. An item of the peasants he would never consider wearing back then. But now, he couldn't care less about his appearances. Running his hand through his jet black hair, he quickly washed his face and freshened up.

The water rejuvenated his senses, making him more awake. Yet another day of dread. He still couldn't get the strange feeling he woke up with out of his head. Maybe today is going to be different. He will do something that can make his life worthwhile.

Not that he is worthwhile in life.

He laughed bitterly at his own thought. Walking downstairs, he glanced out of the window. London is weeping its continuous tears down to the busy avenues. Buses and cabs crowded the city streets, and the gray mass of clouds never seemed to give a break to sunshine.

After my dreaming

I woke with this fear

What am I leaving,

When I'm done here?

Every day, he lived life like a burden. It was hard at first, but now it was getting to an overwhelming breaking point.

He used to have things to live for. At first, his family was taken away. The woman he called mother and his closest confident, his sister, was gone. His father disappeared off the face of humanity, never to be seen again. Next, his fortune is slowly draining, and his business when bankrupt in two years. Finally, the only thing worth living for was one girl. He had her since the beginning, but now fate decided to take her away along with all the things he lost.

He looked around the grand living room. It was filled to the top with priceless paintings, exquisite antiques, and extravagant items. None of which mean any value to him. They were merely objects, object that can be bought with money. None of them were worth his time.

A plan formed in his head. Just a few personal items and enough money to last for a few years was all he needs. It was all he needs to end the everlasting pain and the bottomless hole in his heart.


Albeit the disconsolate weather, many people still are brave enough to walk outside in the rain. She was one of them.

She loved the rain. It reminded her of the days where she would curl up inside the library to read countless books. The days she loved best.

Walking down the slippery streets of London was relaxing. Something she hadn't had since he proposed to her. They have been busy to plan for their upcoming wedding that she had no time on her own, no time to ease her worries and stress.

She veered off to the right and entered the brightly lit boutique. In contrast with the ugly weather, the shop had a warm and cheery feeling to it that makes up think rainbows and sunshine. She handed her umbrella to the worker, who dutifully placed it on the drying rack.

"Ms. Cahill? This way please."

The girl led her upstairs to a private office. Scraps of fabric are littered across the desk. From silk, to velvet, any kind of fabric that you can't even name was visible on the table. Her heart skipped excitedly, looking at the array of dresses in the corner.

A smiling man, no older than 30, looked at her warmly. He had on a fitted white tee, paired with tight black skinny jeans. Slacks and oxfords completed his vintage, yet modern look. A tape measure is slung around his neck. He embraced her with a friendly hug, and then got down to business.

"Ms. Cahill, soon to be Mrs. …?"

"Rosenbloom," She said with a small smile on her face.

"Ah. Congratulations, Ms. Cahill. Please call me Julius. Now, you please stand up to take some measurements?"

She stood up obediently and raises her arms. The process went fast, and she relaxed into the luxurious couch while Julius searched for wedding dresses that would be to her likings.

Julius came back a few moments later with several stunning gowns. He helped her into them one by one, and gave her some input on each dress, but leaving the choice up to her. By the end, Amy chose a cream-white floor length gown, adorned with pearls on the neckline. It was simple, but the form-fitting top mixed with the free-flowing bottom screamed elegance. Julius nodded in approval at her choice.

"It fits you well, Ms. Cahill. I hope you enjoy the dress. And come back if anything needs to be altered," Julius chuckled, "speaking of altered, it reminds me of how many times my loyal customer, a man who goes by Mr. Kabra, would come back demanding the was a little flaw here and there."

She looked at Julius, puzzled. It must be a mistake. He doesn't know the same Kabra that I know.

Julius caught her puzzlement. "Do you by chance know Mr. Kabra? Handsome young man, the thing I remember is his amber eyes."

She froze, at the mention of amber eyes. She felt her cheeks color uncontrollably, just like the effect he would have on her when they were young. "Well…we're…friends, you could say."

So if you're asking me

I want you to know

Julius nodded, but his eyes were focused on her expression. They stood there in silence, but then, Julius said,

"Ms. Cahill, do you … love Mr. Rosenbloom?"

"Yes…" She paused, but not wanting to sound hesitant, confirmed it with, "Yes I do."

"Well, I want the best for your future, and it looks like that you and Mr. Kabra is more than "friends". When I mentioned his name, you had this look that was only reserved for him. Ms. Cahill, do make the right decision, after all, it's a marriage you are dealing with…"

She was surprised by the way Julius seemed to see through her.

"I know what I chose. I don't regret my decisions." She answered briskly.

She paid for her dress, and then thanked Julius for all his help. She left the shop and disappeared back onto the wet streets of London.


He pushed the call button. This can go well, as he hoped. Or this can go completely wrong.

But whatever happens, he has a plan B if things got out of control.

He waited. The ring reverberated in his eared eerily. No answer.

After what seemed like an eternity, a woman's voice sounded from the other end of the phone.

"Hello?"

Ian was relieved that she picked up. Hearing her sweet voice brought back memories from years ago when they were teenagers. The different adventures all had the memories of her. She was impossible to forget.

"Hello, Amy."

There was a pause. "Ian? I haven't heard from you in so long!"

He felt his lips curl up into a smile. No matter how much he wants her, she is always taken, out of his grasp, out of his reach.

"Amy, it's nice to hear from you again. I called to tell you that… I can't make it to your wedding. I'm sorry. Congratulations to you and Jake."

"Oh." Disappointment echoed in her tone. "Well, whatever you're up to, I hope it goes well. Do you think we can meet sometimes? I… miss you a lot, Ian."

Ian almost wanted to change his decisions after hearing her utter disappointment.

"Amy, I miss you too. But I really don't think we should see each other. It's better if we don't. For both of us."

When my time comes

Forget the wrong that I've done

Help me leave behind some

Reasons to be missed

"Why?" Amy asked, completely taken by surprise.

"Amy, you're getting married. You can't look back at us anymore. Look into your future, focus on yourself. Amy, it's time to let go of our past."

Don't resent me

And when you're feeling empty

Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest, leave out all the rest

"But-"

"It's for your own good. Please, don't hate me for what I'm doing. Forget about me, but my memories will be with you forever."

Don't be afraid

I've taken my beating

I've shed but I'm me.

"Ian, no, you can't be serious! We can be friends, good friends. Please, listen to me and don't leave!"

I'm strong on the surface

Not all the way through

I've never been perfect

And neither have you

"I've made too many mistakes in the past. I've hurt you countless times. I'm sorry, love, but I need to escape my past. I need a break from the nightmares. I need a new start."

"But I don't understand-"

So if you're asking me

I want you to know

"I want you to be happy; I want the best for you. Amy, you will be happy with Jake. I can never give you what he can offer, what he has. I will never be good enough for you."

When my time comes

Forget the wrong that I've done

Help me leave behind some

Reasons to be missed

"We're both hurting. If we end it, our pains will end too. Amy, I'm only going to ask you to keep me in your memories."

"Ian, where are you? Are you at home? I'm coming to find you! Don't you dare to leave!"

Don't resent me

And when you're feeling empty

Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest, leave out all the rest

"Amy, don't come. I'm going to somewhere where no one can find me. I need to escape my own world. Just for a few year. But this will be the last time we talk to each other. I don't want it to end this way, but if it's the only way, then I will have to do it. I will never forget you."

Forgetting all the hurt inside

You've learned to hide so well

Pretending someone else can come

And save me from myself

I can't be who you are

"Ian Kabra, I know where you are. I'm coming whether you like it or not–"

"Love, one more thing; I am sorry for what I've done to you in Korea. Forget about that. I know you will never forgive me. I can't be who you are."

"IAN! I forgive you! I mean it, it was so long ago. We were young and stupid. I'm almost here."

"I love you, Amy."

Click. He ended call.

It was harder than he thought to face Amy. She was still so stubborn like before.

He had to leave before she got here. He quickly placed his luggage in his car. Before taking off, Ian smashed his phone against the ground. He had to disconnect himself completely from Amy.

The black smartphone shattered into tiny pieces. He grinded the glass shards with the heel of his designer shoes. He was cutting off all the connection he had to her.

He jumped into the car, revved up the engine, and took off. He didn't look back to see the frantic Amy running into the mansion.

Amy crashed through the front door of the mansion. It was disconcertingly silently in the place. Her first instinct was to check his room.

It was empty. Literally. Drawers were stripped bare of clothing. His desk was clean of documents. The only thing that caught her attention was a silver envelope.

She recognized it immediately. It was the same envelope that held her wedding invitation. She ripped it open, only to reveal a handwritten note in elegant cursive.

It read:

When my time comes

Forget the wrong that I've done

Help me leave behind some

Reasons to be missed

Don't resent me

And when you're feeling empty

Keep me in your memory

Leave out all the rest, leave out all the rest

Forgetting all the hurt inside

You've learned to hide so well

Pretending someone else can come

And save me from myself

I can't be who you are

Amy let a tear drop from her eyes. She understood why Ian wanted to leave, and it was because of all the pain he had from the past. She couldn't blame him for wanting to escape into a better reality.

She ran outside, although she knew it was too late. His presence was gone. The shattered remains of a phone is scattered by her feet.

There is nothing she can do to stop him , but his memories will always be with her.


Her jade green eyes still burned into his vision. He imagined her finding that he is gone. It was the best for both of them.

As much as he loved Amy, Ian didn't regret his decision.

I can't be who you are


A/N.

Please review and tell me if there is anything that I can improve on, need more work and that needs to be better. This is more of a sad one-shot, so if you don't like sad stories, then read my other stories Gonna Be Me and Reminiscence. I guess they're happier and have better endings.

Some questions…

1. Who are your favorite singers/bands? I love Linkin Park, AWOLNation, Imagine Dragons, and Avril Lavigne.

2. What's your favorite pairing? Well, obviously I love Amian…

3. Are you excited for the new series? I Am!

4. Do you speak/are you learning another language? I have to learn Spanish in school.

Review, sweethearts, por favor :)