AN: This kind of sleeping disorder really exists. I saw an interesting documentary once, and all of a sudden it became clear to me that Daryl Dixon has sexomnia, no doubt. SPOILER ALERT! Disclaimer: I do not own The Walking Dead.
Carol was having a dream about him again. That kind of dream. And it was unbelievably realistic.
Daryl was on top of her, kissing her lips fiercely. She wanted him, she could feel his hard, demanding lips on her own, well build arms leaning on the cell floor on her both sides, hot breath on her face and something hard towards her hips. Daryl was strong, and she felt herself quite helpless under his muscular and wire body. That helpless feeling made her want him even more.
Carol had always thought that as an opposite of Daryl´s rough habitus he would be surprisingly gentle lover. She wouldn´t have guessed he was so furious. Anyhow, Daryl´s determined kisses and his body so proprietary around her made her feel herself so wanted. He was more into it than Ed had ever been. Like he wanted her really bad. He was wild, almost desperate in his need of closeness. It was like no one had ever let him close that way. His breath was hot and he kissed her hard, biting her lip a little. It almost hurt. "Wait a minute, Carol…" She thought. "Dreams do not hurt. But this can´t be…"
She raised her hands to feel his rough, short hair in her hands. It felt very real. So did the warm tongue in her mouth. She could taste him, and despite the current lousy hygiene circumstances he tasted good. She drew in a deep breath and could feel the scent of his skin in her nose. It was manly, full on testosterone. It was intoxicating, so good that she could easily get dangerously addicted to it – or had already gotten. (The most dangerous drugs could cause an addiction at the first try, couldn´t they?) Daryl´s breath in her ear was loud and heated as he kissed her neck. Her every sense told her that Daryl really was there, eager to make love to her. Unbelievable as it was, she was starting to really believe it. Anyway, dream or not, she was going to enjoy herself.
Carol smiled with her eyes shut as Daryl kissed her lips, her jaw, the sensitive skin right under her ear… and then her neck. Neck was Carol´s sweet spot, and her breathing got instantly heavier. She wrapped her hand behind the back of Daryl´s head and pressed him gently against her. Daryl eagerly took the hint and started to suck her neck. Carol sighed sharply and pressed herself towards him. She could feel his arousal against her center through his jeans and her thin cargo pants. She shivered, as she heard his husky moan in her ear. Carol turn her head so that she could nibble his ear gently with her teeth. He hissed and started moving slowly but rhythmically against her hips. They were practically fucking with their clothes on, and it was so far the best sex Carol had ever had. Ed hadn´t been much for foreplay, nor the missionary position. He had never cared for such intimacy. For Carol, it was Heaven to be there like that with Daryl.
"Oh, Daryl…" She moaned his name and clung on his hair with her hand.
He froze. He raised his head from her neck and studied her face in the darkness of his cell, his eyes full of confusement. Then realization flushed over him.
"Oh, fuck…"
He quickly rolled off her and noted his hard on as he glanced down.
"Fucking hell!"
He cursed looking distressed and sat down a few feet away from Carol, trying his best to cover his embarrassing situation. He leant his head on his knees and hid his face that was currently blushing all red.
"Fucking son of a bitch…" He murmured.
"Daryl… What is it?" Carol rose and leant her elbows on a thin mattress, worry in her eyes. Now she was sure she wasn´t dreaming. Reality had really slapped her face.
He glared at her quickly.
"Sexomnia."
"Sex… what?"
"Fckng slp dsrdr." He muttered quietly.
"Excuse me?"
"It´s a fuckin´ sleepin´disorder!" He snapped.
Carol stared at him in shock. She dadn´t had a clue. She only knew that it was rare that she ever saw him sleeping, he was always keeping a watch. Now that she thought about it, Daryl did always have shadows under his eyes. Suddenly Carol understood that Daryl avoided sleeping in general because of his disorder. Pity flushed over her as she watched him sit there. He was rubbing his face with his rough hands and she could see how tensed his jaw was. He was biting his teeth. Then he sighed and leaned his head to the wall.
"It´s like sleep walking… but worse. I might do some crazy shit and not have a fucking clue of what I´m doin´ ." He explained, staring at the wall.
"Don´t tell the others." He added quickly, a hint of anger in his voice.
"Of course not. So you… are able to have sex when you´re asleep? Is that possible?"
He nodded.
"That´s why I want to sleep alone. I don´t really fancy the idea of rapin´ anyone. At that state I… might be quite… out of control. It´s just pure instinct, my brains are damn off."
"Yeah, I kind of noticed…" Carol admitted in quiet voice.
As soon as Carol had said that Daryl raised his head and nailed his sight at her, looking extremely serious.
"What did I do to ya?"
"Just kissing… and something like that. "
"Nothin´… worse?"
Carol shook her head, swallowing hard. Nothing worse, he said.
"Don´t you remember anything when this happens? Your sexomnia?" She asked cautiously.
"Sometimes, a little. Sometimes I have a total fucking blackout. Like this time."
The emptiness Carol felt was almost unbearable.
That rough but lovely man had made her feel so good, answered the needs that had grown inside her for so long. And now he said it was all just an accident, that he didn´t know what he was doing. That he didn´t remember. That he wouldn´t have done it if he had been awake. That he regretted it.
Carol felt herself humiliated. It wasn´t Daryl´s fault, though. But there was no denying that she had been ready to go all the way with Daryl, happy to do so. And Daryl didn´t feel the same way. He hadn´t been all hard and horny because of her. She didn´t know who he had been with in his dreams. Clearly not with her. She turned her back to Daryl.
Carol tried to calm down, but the memory of Daryl on top of her, kissing her fiercely was so fresh in her mind that it kept her restless. She tried her best to hide her chest going up and down at unnatural pace with her thickened breathing. She could feel that her lips were still tickling, and swollen, for sure glowing all red – obvious hints of her still being aroused.
"You shouldn´t have come in here first place. I told ya I wanted to be alone… I told ya to go away…"
Daryl´s voice was a heart-breaking mix of sadness, remorse, anger and factitious rudeness, with a hint of something Carol couldn´t quite name. For someone else it would have sounded like he was making excuses, stating himself innocent and trying to get himself out of trouble like a nine year old schoolboy. But Carol understood him trying to tell her that he really had tried to protect her. How many times had people mistaken him being cold and unfriendly, when it had been his way to protect them? She wondered.
"I thought it wouldn´t be good for you to be alone tonight, after… what happened yesterday." Carol said quietly but didn´t turn around.
"After I killed my zombie-brother."
"Yes."
"So I ended up fuckin´ molestin´ ya. Great."
Carol knew that behind his sarcasm, Daryl was angry at himself, not really because of her. It had took her some time to understand the difference, she was so used to his former husband always blaming, shouting and beating her every time he was pissed off about anything.
"I´m sorry that I was so stubborn and stayed, you did tell me to go sleep in my own cell." She said with settling tone.
"I hope ya didn´t freak out too bad."
"Not at all." Then she whispered quietly towards the wall: "That´s the problem…"
Daryl´s eyes narrowed and he furrowed his brows as he turned to stare at her back in amazement.
"What?"
Carol shut her eyes. He had heard it. She didn´t mean him to hear her statement, but then again, what was there to lose? Now he knew she fancied him. The worst possible thing to happen was that he didn´t answer her feelings. And he had already done that, he´d made it very clear that he hadn´t intended to do anything with her. She could take the disappointment like a grown-up and go on with her life. She was sure they would stay friends even if Daryl knew she had enjoyed his unconscious moment. No harm done. Maybe it would build his confidence a little.
"Ya saying… You liked it?" He sounded surprised.
Carol snorted.
"Yeah. I liked it. Pretty much. But I would have preferred you being awake!"
For a long moment, the only voice that could be heard was a distant moan of the walkers outside. Then all of a sudden, Carol felt a light touch on her arm. She rolled on her back and saw him there right beside her. His face was lit by the Moon rays that filtered in from the small window up on the wall. He looked her in the eyes looking anxious, then his gaze wandered to her lips (still red and swollen) and then to her arm, which his hand was now fondling tentatively. She smiled and nod her head a little backwards. It was a signal, an invitation. Daryl returned her a small, playful smile before he gently climbed over her and started to kiss her soft and gently. Carol really liked him more awake.