No IM3 spoilers.

Sorry if there's any mistakes.

I swear to all the gods that I'm actually working on the last chapter of Robin Hood, but here's something while you wait.

Tony Stark is confused, now, for most people, confusion is a perfectly normal state of being, but not for Tony. Confusion involves not knowing, and not knowing is not something he does.

The reason for his confusion: Steve Rogers.

And the thing is, Steve isn't all that complicated, he's completely simple really, (aside from the whole super-solider-frozen-for-70 year thing) and Tony knows almost everything about him, except for the one thing he desperately wants to know: 'does he like dick?

I know what you're thinking, 'couldn't he just ask?'

No! That would completely ruin the game of pseudo-gay chicken they've been playing.

If you'd have asked Tony three months ago he would have said 'hell to the fucking no!' But that was before.

The change occurred about a month ago, after all of the avengers had moved into the tower. Tony's original plan was to flirt with Steve and make the man from the past as uncomfortable as possible, but that didn't go quite as expected.

The first time he did something was after a debriefing at S.H.I.E.L.D.

He had changed out of the suit, but everyone else still wore their battle clothes, including Captain America who was fully decked out in his usual ass-hugging red, white, and blue glory.

As they were leaving Tony came up behind Steve and gave the Captain's ass a firm squeeze. When Steve turned around his expression was everything Tony had hoped; wide eyed shock, confusion, and a blush to top it off. He'd never seen Steve blush before then, but he knew he wanted to see it again.

Tony just smiled brightly then shot Steve a wink as he retreated from the room.

When they got home Tony went straight to the lab but, as expected, Steve was soon there too.

The thing that really threw Tony through a loop was that, instead of being yelled at, or maybe punched in the face, Steve just told him that his actions weren't 'work appropriate'.

No threats to kick his ass if he did it again, or speeches about the evils of homosexuality. Not what Tony expected, which is why he was, and still is, confused.

So he did the only logical thing and changed the game from pissing Steve off to shameless flirting, and the results were just as confusing.

At first Steve would roll his eyes and walk away, but as time progressed Steve started to just remain passive. If Tony put his hand on his lower back? Steve just left it. If Tony stood closer to him than was socially acceptable? Steve stood his ground.

The really confusing part came last night on the official avenger movie night, and continued into breakfast.

Tony usually sat with Clint to loudly mock the films, or with Bruce to rip on the bad science, but not last night. Tony came early with a big fluffy blanket and a plan, taking Thor's usual seat beside Steve on the two person couch.

Although there was way more than enough room for them sit apart, Tony sat pressed against Steve's side and threw the blanket over them both.

Steve examined him briefly through the corner of his eye but, as expected, didn't move.

The shock came when, halfway through the first movie, Steve put his arm around Tony's shoulders, pulling him closer. Tony almost choked on his popcorn but neither Steve nor anyone else on the team reacted.

Tony, being himself, had to see just how much further he could take this. So, slipping his hand under the blanket, he began to rub the light circles against the inside of Steve's thigh, making an effort to keep his eyes on the screen even when Steve narrowed his eyes at him questioningly.

Tony continued the touches with no interruption from Steve, and when he slid his hand higher and felt the bulge in Steve's sweatpants, he decided to make things more interesting by moving under the waistband, which was also how he found out that America's national treasure likes to go commando.

Steve only responded by shifting a bit, spreading his legs to accommodate Tony's hand, and Tony had to fight down the grin that threatened to split his face, because randomly smiling like an idiot would definitely tip everyone else off.

If the rest of the team noticed their exhibition, then they did a wonderful job at pretending to just watch the movie.

He slowly stroked Steve to full hardness, which became increasingly difficult to hide as Steve grew, because at his six foot two, Steve is very proportional.

When the blonde was hard as a rock Tony switched from slow strokes to faster motions, twisting his wrist and thumbing the head of Steve's leaking cock to spread pre cum over his length on the down-stroke and paying special attention the the vain on the underside.

Even though his eyes never left the screen Tony had no idea what he had watched, he remembers seeing Johnny Depp decapitate a man using a barber blade, but he had no idea how he should have feel about it.

All his focus was on the long, smooth length of Steve's cock, the wetness from the pre cum, and the heat radiating between them, but most of all, trying to keep his breathing even and ignore his own throbbing erection.

Tony could tell Steve was close when he heard the soldiers breathing pick up slightly, plump, pink lips parting in a barely audible whimper, and before long he felt the warmth of Steve's cum flow over his hand.

He couldn't help the low moan that passed his lips at the feeling of Steve spilling over his hand, he wanted to see it, and taste it, and so much more.

Bruce turned to them at that point and raised a scrutinizing eyebrow, but Tony was able to pull himself together enough to answer with a million watt smile, and Bruce just shook his head and turned back to the screen.

Steve, being the kind man that he is, rubbed Tony off from over his jeans, using smooth lines and squeezing at just the right times, with just enough pressure and friction to do the job in only minutes.

Although Tony hadn't come only from over-the-clothes action since he was fourteen, he couldn't bring himself to feel ashamed, the combination of the exhibitionism, and the fact that Captain Fucking America was rubbing his cock, would have made anyone come in their pants.

Looking back, he probably should have planned things better, because in the end they were both left sitting with cum in their pants, in a room full of people, with three and a half hours of movies left, and wasn't as if they can have just excused themselves, unless they wanted to broadcast their matching wet spots to the team.

Tony woke up the next morning with no idea how he got to bed, and somehow wearing fresh underpants, but he was happy because there would finally be no more confusion!

Guys don't just rub each other's dicks, so clearly Steve likes The D, mystery solved, right?

Wrong!

When Tony got to the kitchen this morning the super soldier acted a though nothing had happened.

And yeah, OK, Tony didn't expect him to declare that they jerked each other off, but he did expect Steve to acknowledge that they had moved to a new stage in their 'relationship'; standing closer him, maybe a little hand touching but no, Steve gave him nothing, nada.

This is usually the point where Tony would give up and find someone else to annoy but he was starting to like Steve. The guy is a living legend that actually lives up to the legend in every way, and he's ridiculously sexy while doing it. He's nice and funny and smart in all the way that Tony isn't.

So Tony bolted, he ran to his room (the lab) and slammed his door (told JARVIS to enter lock down) like a twelve year old girl who got the note passed back with the 'no' checked off.

Which brings us to this point.

"Sir, Captain Rogers requests entry to the lab, shall I grant it?" Jarvis asks interrupting Tony's focus.

"Sure," Tony says waving his hand dismissively, "wait, actually no!" he amends, suddenly remembering the cause of his current brooding.

"He has already entered," Jarvis states unapologetically.

Crap! He did not want to do this today, or ever. Steve was probably going to want to talk about feelings, yuck.

"Hey sweet cheeks," Tony says overly brightly when Steve comes in to view.

Steve doesn't even react to the pet name, which just goes to show how long they've been playing this game.

"We're all leaving for the team bonding exercise in five minutes," Steve says flatly.

Tony's smile slips a little, he expected Steve would want to talk, and he thought that would be the worst option, but having Steve completely ignore it so much more hurtful.

You know what? No! Tony Stark does not play games! If Steve doesn't want him then that's fine, he can just find someone else.

To show Steve how very fine he is, Tony agrees to go on his stupid team bonding thingy.

He goes up to his room and changes into his sexiest work out clothes (the one that always makes Steve stare), and his most expensive pair of dark sunglasses (the ones he knows Steve hates), before meeting the team in the van. Then he makes sure to take the seat furthest from Steve, completely ignoring the blonde's existence for the entirety of the trip.

When they pull up to a secluded park he sees Coulson standing in the centre of a field surrounded by a platform decorated with decks of cards, a boxing ring, and a darkened tent the size of a house.

What do these things have in common? No, really, what do they have in common? Maybe you can tell him, because Tony has no freaking clue.

"Hello Avengers. For your team bonding exercise this time I thought I'd try something new. You'll be splitting into teams of two-"

"How can we bond if we split up?" Clint asks with a smirk which quickly leaves his face when Coulson shoots him a quelling look.

"Me, Natasha, Thor versus Cap, Clint, Bruce," Tony says, 1) because it's obviously the best arrangement and 2) because he's not being on the same team with Steve.

"Who died and made you in charge?" Natasha asks crossing her arm over her chest.

Tony briefly wonders if she knows how that action pushes up her breasts and makes it hard to focus, then again, it is Natasha, so she probably knows exactly what she's doing.

Tony forces himself to focus and rolls his eyes. "It's the perfect division of smart," he motions between him and Bruce, "strong," between Cap and Thor, "and spy," Clint and Natasha.

"Should we insulted that we're not classified as 'smart' or 'strong'?" Clint asks, raising an eyebrow to Natasha.

"I'm on Cap's team." Natasha informs, shooting a glare at Tony, leaving no room for argument.

"I had already made teams," Coulson speaks up, "but sure. Why not do whatever you want?"

Coulson sighs and composes himself before he speaks again, "the first challenge is building a structure out of cards. The team to build it the highest and the most sturdy one wins."

Tony barks a laugh. "Really? I'm an engineer, I built Iron Man in a cave from scraps! How is this a challenge!?"

"We will have a mighty victory!" Thor announces slapping him on the back. Clint beams at him but the rest of the team, no wait, the other team, glares at him.

"You're forgetting something Tony." Bruce says adjusting his glasses. "This is a team exercise."

Tony freezes, then takes stock of his teammates. He has Clint, who has the patience of a five year old, and Thor, who's idea of 'gentle' is only smashing a small hole.

Crap.

And the stupid grin on Steve's face makes it suck so much more.

Of course they lose.

Steve was born in a time before TV, so he's a pro at doing silly boring stuff like this, Bruce is like a fucking monk, sitting with his legs crossed, placing cards gently onto the mammoth structure, and at one point Natasha climbs onto Steve's shoulders to place cards higher!

Tony's team manages to build a pitiful house which he promptly smashes when he sees the other team's ( he dubs Team Suck) structure.

Coulson declares Team Suck- he actually calls them 'Natasha's team', but Tony knows them by their true name- the winners and they move over to the boxing ring.

"You pick your best fighters, create a strategy, and they spar. First back to hit the mat loses, and the winner takes this game."

"We pick Cap," Natasha declares without consulting her team, but they don't seem to mind her executive decision.

"I wanna do this one," Tony offers automatically, and judging from Natasha's knowing smirk, that's exactly just what she expected.

"Pssh, no. We're letting Thor take this one," Clint says nudging- trying to nudge- Thor forward.

"I will not steal a battle from a fellow warrior." Thor corrects. "If this is a fight Anthony feels he should have then he shall take it."

Tony raises an eyebrow at Thor. "Thanks buddy, but it's really not that big a deal," he says getting into the ring with Steve anyway.

Natasha whispers something to Steve that makes him blush, then take off his shirt. Two events, Tony suspects, are very closely related.

He's mad that they want to play dirty but that doesn't stop him from admiring Steve's God-like physique, no offence meant to Thor, but Steve's body does rival the God's.

Once Tony's done staring, he decides that if Steve wants to play dirty, then they can play dirty.

The fight begins, and for a long time they dance around each throwing light punches, testing the others weakness, but that gets boring so Tony sets a plan and sends a sloppy punch at Steve's face which leaves his right side completely open, and Steve automatically dodges, sending a punch to Tony's unprotected side.

Excellent, Tony thinks in his best Mr. Burns impersonation.

He throws himself dramatically against the ropes gasping for air- which actually does kinda fuck with his already weak lungs but he soldiers through- and when Steve's face transforms from smug and triumphant to shocked and panicked, quickly rushing over to check on him, Tony knows a little extra lung damage is worth it.

With one swift motion Tony swipes his foot under Steve, knocking the super solider onto his back with a thud, leaving Steve looking up at him with confusion, then hurt and then white hot anger.

Tony grins down at him and offers a hand up, which Steve slaps aside in favour of standing on his own and glaring daggers into Tony's head.

"Aw, honey, don't be a sore loser." Tony knows he's being an ass, but Steve used him to get off and then ignored, so, screw him, Tony can act like a child if he wants.

"You, haven't won yet Stark, you have one more challenge," Coulson says gesturing to the large lack tent, "that's a laser tag course. Last person standing wins this whole thing for their team, so go get suited up."

If by 'suited up' Coulson meant 'put on stupid light-up vests,' then that's exactly what they did, and five minutes later they're spread out in the course looking for blood.

The first to go is Bruce, which they all agreed was for the best since a structure that was built overnight probably wouldn't stand up against the Hulk.

Next is Thor because he tries to throw his gun at Natasha instead of shooting, and although he hits her in the chest with the gun, it doesn't count and she takes him out.

Thor is quickly followed by Clint and Natasha who take each other out in a blaze of red-lasered glory.

Which leaves only two.

Like with sparring, they circle around each other for a while, but again, Tony makes a move so bold that Steve never sees it coming. Which is why Tony is now, again, standing over Steve with a victorious, cocky grin.

He knows he should just shoot him and end it, but he wants to rub it in the strategist's face that he was able to out think him.

"Is there any way I can convince you to just take your victory and at least not shoot me?" Steve asks, propping himself up on his elbows.

Tony makes a show of stroking his goatee. "Hmmmm. Nope," he says popping the 'p'.

Steve sighs and stands quickly before taking a step forward.

Tony jerks the gun up to keep aim at Steve's chest, but relaxes it when Steve lifts his hand in surrender, dropping his gun which remains tethered to his vest by the cord.

"Are you sure there isn't anything I can do?" Steve pleads, slowly encroaching on Tony's space.

Tony takes a step back, but is met with the resistance of a wall. This just makes Steve step even closer, until he's pressed up against the length of Tony's body.

"Not even this?" Steve asks, squeezing the forming bulge in Tony's pants.

Tony moans quietly bucking into Steve's warm hand.

Steve continues to stroke over Tony's pants, adding pressure and speed at just the right times.

"Does it feel good Tony?" Steve whispers. "Or do you want more? Do you want me to take you into my hand? My mouth?" he leans closer to whisper against Tony's ears, "my ass?"

Tony lets out a low pleading groan, dropping his gun to wrap his hands around Steve's neck bringing him down for a kiss. He wants that so badly, he wants to tease Steve until he needy and begging, then he wants fuck him senseless, knowing Steve wants it just as bad.

Tony is brought out his thoughts of debauchery by a loud 'DING DING DING'. He looks down to see his vest flashing red with defeat, then back up to see Steve wearing a very Tony-esque cocky, satisfied grin.

That bastard shot him, with his own gun! Steve could have used his, but no he purposely and maliciously chose to use Tony's.

He's is just about to rip Steve a new one but he only get as far as opening his mouth before Steve starts to speak.

"We should go out for dinner," he states completely out of the blue, before giving a more shy, Steve-like smile.

Tony closes his mouth and opens it again dumbly. "I'll, uh, pick you up tonight at eight?"

Steve steps back with a nod. "That sounds great. I'm bored of games," he says looking into Tony's eyes as the team enters, "I think it's time we claim our prize, don't you?"

Tony nods, maybe games aren't so bad, that is, if the prize in right.