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The Pyramid Scheme
Chapter 1: Five Years
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Great Pyramid of Giza, Egypt. October 31, 1981.

"Ohhh," Lily Evans groaned, standing shakily. "What in Merlin's name -" Lungs aching, she broke off into a series of coughs, bracing herself on a nearby sconce. Then she remembered. The Grand Prize Galleon Draw, the snap decision to visit Egypt, the Great Pyramid, the thought that Sev would be so thrilled if she managed to uncover some long-lost ancient magical knowledge (preferably Dark, she knew)... That was when she noticed the sconce was vibrating. Someone must be trying to break through the wards, she thought, and that's why the Repository woke me up so abruptly. I should probably go and check... not that they'll actually be able to break in or do anything, but still… Hey, how long was I out anyway? Hope Mum and Dad didn't notice anything… Legs still a bit shaky, she stumbled over to the rune array showing the time. "10 hours?!" she exclaimed. "Tuney's bound to have noticed something wrong with the replica and gone spare - wait, WHAT ON EARTH?!" Was the year indicator really displaying 1981?

An hour and twenty minutes later, Lily had established (and re-confirmed about ten times) that she had, in fact, been in the Repository for over five years. Also, that she had only been revived because the replica had "catastrophically failed" just then. Also, that the Repository had narrowly escaped destruction from a hail of Reductos - or, better yet, Avadas - from her wand only because her head was pounding too much to focus properly to cast the curse.

A further three hours later, she still hadn't gone far. Exhausted but feeling much better after reducing a number of priceless artifacts to rubble, she was sitting disconsolately a bare ten feet from the alcove she'd apparently occupied since 1976. "Everyone is going to bloody murder me," she muttered. Her parents. Tuney. All of her friends... The image of her best friend darted into her mind. Had he decided to write her off permanently after their unbelievably stupid confrontation at the portrait hole at the end of term? She really should have worked up the nerve to go to Spinner's End and grovel properly before leaving for Egypt, she thought. Hopefully the replica had done the same upon getting back. It was supposed to be a copy of her, anyhow. How much harm could it possibly have done in five short years?

Egyptian Centre for Alchemical Studies, Egypt. December 21, 1981.

Everyone else at the Egyptian Centre for Alchemical Studies was off at the huge Solstice Ball, but Sevilen Sevans (it was a bit silly, but it was the only name she'd been able to come up with on short notice - Sevilen reminded her of Sev, and as for her surname, well, who could blame her for indulging in a bit of fantasy?) had begged off, citing some unspecified minor malady.

In truth, Lily didn't feel much like celebrating anything at all. Upon emerging from the Great Pyramid in November, she'd realized she was just about broke and completely unable to afford an international portkey back to England. But when she'd attempted to withdraw some galleons from her vault at the local Gringotts branch, she'd been rudely ejected by the goblins for allegedly attempting to impersonate a deceased war hero. At least she'd been lucky enough to secure an open research position at the Centre for Alchemical Studies, thanks largely to her 'new' knowledge acquired from the Repository. (After her unpleasant encounter with the goblins, she'd been cautious enough - taking a page from Sev's book - to use a glamour charm and avoid giving her 'real' name.) But then, a few days after she'd settled in, she'd paid a visit to the Library of Alexandria and looked 'herself' up, just to dispel the crazy notion that the goblins might have been right about her replica being some kind of war hero...

International Portkey Arrivals, England. October 31, 1982.

"Name and place of origin?"

"Sevilen Sevans, Egyptian Centre for Alchemical Studies."

"Wand, please."

Lily handed it over for registration. She still missed her old willow wand, even though her new birch wand was arithmantically a better fit for her magical core.

"All set. Next!"

It had taken the better part of a year, but she'd finally managed to accept what had happened (mostly... she didn't think she'd ever stop feeling sick at the thought of "Lily Potter"), devise a plan, and work up the nerve to return to England. At least for a short visit. Her supervisor, who reminded her all too vividly of Professor Slughorn, had only been too happy to approve her Hallowe'en vacation plans after she'd bribed him with some crystallized pineapple ("Oh, thank you! It's my favorite... How did you know?" "Intuition."). Now came the hard part: facing one Severus Snape.

Spinner's End, England. October 31, 1982.

Wand in hand, Lily hesitantly approached Spinner's End. The Ministry's records indicated that Sev was now the owner and sole resident of the place - and he should be away at Hogwarts this time of day (she still couldn't believe her admittedly brilliant friend had managed to become a Hogwarts Professor so young!). Still, Ministry records had a tendency of being unreliable, and it couldn't hurt to be cautious. Tobias had been a nightmare, and she didn't fancy facing the bear of a man without her wand at the ready.

...Well, either Tobias or some unknown girlfriend of Sev's. It had been five years, after all. She tried not to dwell on that possibility too much.

Once she'd gotten closer, she noticed that the place looked deserted. It hadn't changed much. If anything, it looked even more like a dump than it did five years ago. Letting out a short breath of relief (for she couldn't imagine any sensible witch tolerating such disarray), she stepped gingerly up to the wards, bracing herself to be thrown back into the street. There was only a slim chance that she was still keyed in (especially as she was 'supposedly' Lily Po- she gritted her teeth at the near slip), but she thought it was worth trying. If it didn't work, well, she'd just have to apparate to some kind of park - maybe the Forest of Dean - and camp out there until she could find a discreet fireplace she could use to reach Sev.

To Lily's surprise, the wards admitted her without any fuss. Grinning, she strode in... only to walk straight into a literal wall of dust.

"And here I thought I'd left all the dust behind in Egypt," she grumbled.

Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, Scotland. October 31, 1982.

Potions Master Severus Snape was in his usual foul mood. Today, however, it was even fouler thanks to the excitement from Hogwarts' staff and students alike over the Hallowe'en Feast that night, the first since the Dark Lord had fallen a year ago. Everyone else only saw reason to celebrate - but how could he, when his Lily had died that day? Idiot, he berated himself, she was never 'your' Lily. Clenching his fists, he slammed down his occlumency shields and stormed into the classroom, immediately issuing detentions to two unlucky third-year Hufflepuffs. But even bullying the Hufflepuffs failed to make him feel better.

Spinner's End, England. October 31, 1982.

It was an even angrier - and somewhat inebriated - Severus Snape that flooed in to Spinner's End later that night. Dumbledore, the old coot, had caught him on the verge of demonstrating Sectumsempra on two especially dunderheaded seventh-year Gryffindors that reminded him uncomfortably of James Potter and Sirius Black, and promptly ordered him to take several days off away from Hogwarts to "rest." Having nowhere else to go, Severus had had little choice but to return to his home at Spinner's End. He knew it'd be bad. Merlin, he'd probably have to adjust the wards to stop himself from wandering out to their - blast it, his - old spot by the riverbank... He cursed and downed another shot of firewhiskey.

"As if - could ever 'njoy spendin' time at this dum'," Severus muttered furiously and somewhat incoherently as he stormed out of the fireplace into the usual cloud of dus -

Wait. This can't be Spinner's End, he suddenly realized. The place was cheerily lit, there wasn't a speck of dust to be seen, and a fragrant aroma was wafting from the kitchen. Except... he recognized the books on the walls, bound in old black or brown leather. He recognized the old armchair and the candle-filled lamp hung from the ceiling - although the armchair was looking decidedly newer and the lamp was giving off significantly more light than it ought to. And he recognized the rickety table and the threadbare sofa - although the table was fairly gleaming and there was an odd noise coming from the sofa.

It took several seconds for Severus to recognize the odd noise as soft snoring. It took several more seconds before he had the presence of mind to draw his wand. He cursed his firewhiskey-dulled reflexes. There was an intruder in his home - an especially dunderheaded one, apparently - and he was in no mood to be gentle, especially tonight. He'd have to see to his wards posthaste, too; they were supposed to at least alert him if anyone other than himself or Li- If anyone other than himself attempted entry. He gritted his teeth at yet another near slip.

Wand raised, Severus glided over to the sofa like some large and malevolent bat, black robes billowing behind him. A forceful Expelliarmus was on the tip of his tongue when he saw just who it was sleeping peacefully on his sofa.

"Li - ly?!" he croaked inarticulately, ebony wand slipping from suddenly nerveless fingers.

For only the second time in his adult life (ironically, the first had been exactly one year ago), Severus fainted.