A/N: Okay, here's to answering those guest reviews:

ShinyShiny9: Yeah, Shadow is kind of a "wise guy". Thinks he's so smart-"I AM THE ULTIMATE LIFEFORM!" Yeah, but SEGA still gets to tell you what to do. Heh heh.

bearvalley3365: Thank you. That was the intent. But no, I don't write OC's. Sorry.

Soulful: Thank you very much. The intent was to be funny. And I laughed a lot while writing it. "Pinkish"? Ha ha, bad habits. Yeah, the only thing in the world that is easier to make than destroy. :D And thank you again.

A Random Potato: AHAHAHA Yes, it made me laugh while writing it. Glad you liked it.

becca: Thanks.

"Strong Language"

I don't own Sonic. If I did, I wouldn't have to turn to fan-fiction to make my love for him known-and I'd be a lot richer. SEGA owns him.

It's hard being a mom.

I'm always hearing from my friends that it's so hard to be a parent, and life is different for me because I'm single.

Yes, it is different.

It's a lot harder.

"What possessed you to think this was okay?"

Three of the boys look at me like I'm insane. Like I'm overreacting. It's just the "d" word, they're probably thinking. Just a little word. And I suppose, considering their age, I probably am. My friends have told me that the teenage years are the years some "colorful" language starts to pop up in their vocabulary. I almost expected it of them.

But I didn't expect it of him.

"Sonic. I'm waiting."

He slowly looks up from the floor, emerald-green eyes glittering as they fix on me. He's the only one of the four who seems genuinely ashamed, head bowed, shuffling the shiny red shoes on the carpet uncomfortably.

I look at each of them in turn: Knuckles, Espio, Shadow. The former two look up at me strangely; the latter stares, unfazed. I don't think he cares either way. Why do you think he's the one who curses every time something hits him?

"This is not acceptable. You are examples. Children play these games; would you want young children to be copying you?"

Espio shakes his head, and Knuckles mutters an almost inaudible "no", looking down at the floor. Shadow just continues to stare. Sonic shuffles his feet faster.

"I've heard that it is 'cool' or something so say such words, I suppose. It's 'strong'. I half expected it of you three." My voice softens as I look at the three older boys, red, gold, and violet eyes meeting mine.

"But not you." My voice hardens again. People tell me that my eyes look like colored diamonds, steely when I am angry. "You're the hero. Don't you know better?"

I don't receive an answer, his expression hardening. Maybe it's got to do with the lack of parenting he had growing up; Sonic never shows how he's feeling. It's like trying to read a brick wall. I've tried to get through, but he just runs away.

My friends, even with their headstrong teenage children, don't have to deal with this.

"I'd give you time out, like other parents, but you're teenagers. I get that your dignity won't hold with 'time-out'." My eyes flicker momentarily on the blue hedgehog and the red echidna, because they are the most notorious for picking at each other's egos. "They try 'positive reinforcement', but I think you're men. You can take this."

Despite my words, I feel unsure that my decision is a wise one. I would not like to be cleaning up vomit today, thank you very much.

"You leave me no choice." Their eyes follow me as I unveil the punishment I have in store for them, sitting on a small plate.

"You're getting soap treatment."

"You're going to make us take baths?" Knuckles asks blankly. Sonic's pupils shrink at the thought. The poor guy hates water. Some others gathered in the room, Tails and Amy and Cream, gain confused expressions, but Rouge shivers slightly, as if she knows.

"No," I say, leaning against the table, trying to look casual.

"I'm going to make you eat it."

Sonic's pupils shrink even farther, and Knuckles looks like he wants to bash his own head in for asking. Tails and Amy grimace, and Cream and Cheese gasp in shock.

Maybe I shouldn't have made this so public.

Nonetheless, I am still firm in my resolve. "There's one half-bar for each of you. Go on."

Sonic shakily takes his first, pressing his lips together tightly. Then each of them take a piece, Knuckles chewing on his lip, Espio looking upwards, and Shadow still looking nonchalantly at me. Sonic goes from staring at the soap in his hand to me and back again.

"You're going to pop them in your mouths at the same time, and you're going to keep them there for a whole minute. Then you can spit it out, but not before. Got it?"

The four of them barely nod.

"Okay." I take out my stopwatch, and Sonic's pupils shrink again. Those things…he loves them and hates them at the same time. He knows I'm serious.

"Ready…go." I press the start button as they put the soap in, and I stand to the side to watch them.

The effects are almost instantaneous; well, for Sonic at least. His eyebrows begin to rise higher and higher on his forehead as he tastes the foul stuff. When they're almost off of his head, his eyes begin to widen and the pupils shrink.

By this time, twenty seconds have passed. Knuckles begins to flex his hands, squeezing and releasing every few seconds, and Espio looks up. He appears to be counting the seconds, trying to hide his emotions. Shadow does nothing.

"Thirty more seconds, guys. You're doing great," I say.

Sonic's expression looks like he's saying, "You're kidding, right?"

Next, his cheeks begin to puff out and he begins to shuffle his feet again. Espio's usually purple skin is starting to change a slightly green tint of purple. Knuckles has closed his eyes, and Shadow is still doing nothing, arms folded across his chest.

"Twenty more seconds."

Sonic is now jumping up and down on the balls of his feet, Espio's tint has become more solid, and Knuckles' eyebrows are heavily creased, like they are when he prays to the Master Emerald. Maybe he is.

"Fifteen. Good job."

Rouge is struggling not to laugh, and it's not hard to see why: Sonic's jumping has turned into a full-out Irish jig. "So much for 'dignity'," she comments.

"Ten."

Tails' eyebrows are rising too. Espio and Sonic have traded colors.

"Five."

Still Shadow does nothing.

"Four."

Knuckles is swinging his arms.

"Three."

Sonic waves his arms up and down, as though he is screaming, "MAKE IT STOP! MAKE IT STOP!"

"Two."

Knuckles looks like he's holding his breath, and Sonic is hitting his head against the wall.

"One."

Sonic kneels at the table, pounding his fist into it, squeezing his eyes shut, and making screaming noises through his closed mouth. Tails and Amy look genuinely concerned, and Rouge is laughing outright.

"Done!" I cry triumphantly, pressing the stop button. "Great job, guys! You can spit the soap out-"

Sonic clutches his mouth and seems to fly towards the nearest trashcan, making a huge show of spitting it out, complete with a loud "PBLTTTTTT" of the tongue. Once certain that he has gotten most of it off, he races towards the bathroom, screaming, "GET IT OFF!" Tails, Amy, and Cream immediately get up to follow him.

Knuckles and Espio are already at another trashcan. Charmy and Vector race over to Espio, yelling, "ESPIO, ARE YOU OKAY!", to which the chameleon seems simply annoyed.

Knuckles, once finished spitting out his soap, looks up angrily to see a guffawing Rouge. He wipes his mouth with his arm, snarling. "I'll show you what's funny, bat!"

Shadow, if anything, seems as unfazed as ever, simply spitting the soap out from his spot like cowboys do.

And he curses at the soap.

Knuckles stops hitting Rouge for a moment to stare at him, the Chaotix stare at him, and Tails, Amy, and Cream stare at him. Sonic, whom has just returned from the bathroom, bangs his head into the wall. "You have got to be kidding me."

Maybe I'll make him eat two full bars next time.

A/N: Why do they call it "strong language" anyway? It doesn't mean that you're strong when you use it; on the contrary, doesn't it mean that your vocabulary is not strong enough to use other words?

EDIT 6/11/13: Wow, thanks very much guys! Already I have a few favorites and reviews for this story. I didn't think I'd get that many in such a short period of time, especially for something as silly as this! With that said, once I get more interesting stuff up here, I hope to please you just as much!

Thanks for reading!