Author's Rambles

Thanks so much for the reviews! I enjoy going through and reading them.

Do I really need a disclaimer at this point? Like...is it really necessary? Did you really skim through 2 previous chapters of porn only to decide at the THIRD chapter that you wanted to leave me angry comments? Didn't think so.

Whoever said that filming sex was easy, obviously lived in some sort of fantasy world. Sora watched Riku and Terra go through the same scene and motions for hours. They would kiss and grab, only to be halted by a unsatisfied Reno. The two actors would separate for a moment and stage hands would descend upon them. Sometimes Riku would need water. Terra would need fluffing. It was understandable, they were normal people after all. Normal people had normal needs.

Sora timidly approached during a pause in what seemed like constant love making. Riku was sitting on the floor, looking exhausted. "Hey, you okay?" the brunette asked. Smooth start, not the best conversational starter but at least he tried. Now just didn't seem like the time to open with a joke.

Riku continued to stare off into space for a second before answering. "Yeah," he mumbled, "just tired." he managed a smile. "Not even I like sex this much." He ran a hand through his silver hair with a yawn. "Reno can be a picky bitch sometimes. It's a little annoying." he finished the sentence with a half smile that ended with a cringe, as if the lingering thought of their boss seemed to cause him anguish.

"Is it always like that?" the younger teen asked. "I mean, the how many times have you repeated this?"

He chuckled. "I don't know actually," he said, "too many times if you ask me. My ass is so sore right now."

Sora laughed along with him but that soon died down, his face becoming serious. "I'll have to go through that too right?"

Riku nodded solemnly. "Yeah, retakes are a part of any movie industry."

"Alright back from the top people!" Reno's voice shattered the small sense of peace that had settled between the two boys. The red head saunted back to the set, plopping down heavily in the director's chair with a agitated sigh. "We're wasting time let's move!" The guys shared a look and with a reassuring pat on Riku's shoulder Sora quickly exited, taking his place off the stage.

Terra offered him a hand, which Riku graciously took. They repositioned themselves accordingly. Riku bent over the desk, bracing himself against the old wood. Terra nestled himself intimately above him. Their chemistry, while incredibly casual, radiated the amount of fatigue experienced by both parties. They were piled on one another like muscled puppies. The thought made Sora grin.

In a similar situation he would probably lean on his scene partner as well. It must be nice to have a close friend to work with. Sora was exhausted just from watching them, doing this alone would probably be torture. Reno began to count down and when the final number escaped his lips the boys changed.

Riku's face contorted in pleasure and soon the moans started. Terra's face took on the look of a man caught up and washed over with waves of rapture. It was amazing how easily they could transition. Maybe it was because of the amount of practice they had. How long had they been doing this again?

Sora quietly backed away, clutching the clipboard to his chest. There was another scene after the one they were filming. It wouldn't hurt to start preparing for it. Watching Riku having sex over and over again was starting to make him feel awkward. It was starting the get harder and harder to ignore the fact that his body was starting to respond to some of the sights and sounds around him.

He continued his trek to another room that was labeled set two. "This is the library." He mumbled softly as he looked around. There were shelves that lined the walls, and some old looking furniture. Someone had already did most of the work for him. That was a plus at least.

Immediately he begin the task of arranging the room. Anything was better than thinking about the sex in the other room. It was distracting. Riku was distracting. Sora shook his head. "I can't believe I keep thinking about that." he lamented; that being the kiss from earlier.

Riku's lips had been so incredibly soft against his own. Their kiss happened so sudden it took him by surprise. He couldn't even be angry about it. In all actuality he should have been angry about a lot of things the older boy did. It seemed that every time Sora turned around, he was the butt of a sexual joke. But he couldn't be angry; not even a little bit. Every tease, joke, and demonstration forced him to test his limits and that was something he desperately needed.

Especially if he was going to make enough money to take care of- "Hey you're new here aren't you?"

Sora frowned at the interruption, following the melodic voice to its owner. "Yeah." he managed, his eyes settling on a petite red haired young woman. She smiled at him and it reached her eyes, making the pretty blue orbs sparkle happily. She wore a white skirt and black tank top shirt and scandals.

"Nice to meet you Newbie." she smiled and it was contagious.

"Thanks," he grinned, "I'm Sora." he offered his hand to shake and she took it gently.

"Kairi."

Blinking he looked down at his clipboard. "Kairi? Yeah you're in this next scene." he continued for no other reason other than to keep the conversation going.

"Yeah I am. Me and Riku are shooting together." she shrugged, coming around to glance over his shoulder. "If Reno ever decides he's satisfied with the current scene that is."

The brunette chuckled at the comment. Not a bad start. He was standing in front of a cute girl and he hadn't said anything stupid; not yet anyway. "Do you need help getting dressed or anything?"

She smiled playfully. "First day on the job and you're already trying to get in my pants Sora?"

The brunette blushed. "No, not at all I was just told that I was supposed to help!" he stammered, although now since she mentioned her pants he would certainly think about them. Did that make him a pervert? Probably. Just a bit.

"I know silly. I'm just teasing." she laughed.

Seriously though, he was going to have to stop falling for these jokes. It was just starting to get sad. A awkward silence settled between them. She smiled at him shyly, a gesture that he returned. She was cute with hair so red it reminded him of roses. "Yeah, I get teased a lot." he sighed sheepishly.

She paused for a moment before erupting into a fit of giggles that she tried to hide unsuccessfully behind her fingers. The sound made her appear youthful and innocent. "Sorry." She said, clearing her throat. "I just didn't expect you to be so honest about it."

"Yeah well, since I've been here Riku gets me all the time." he admitted, making sure to leave out some of the more personal bits.

Kairi's face lit up. "Riku does that to you?" She laughed again, hands going to hold her side. "My goodness!" She sighed. "He is a trickster. Don't take it too personally though. He's a great guy."

"Yeah he is." Sora mused. It was the truth, despite all the odd things that had transpired between them. There was a method to Riku's madness. He could see that now. "So you said that you and Riku are acting in the next scene?" he said, quickly changing the subject.

She nodded. "There's a bit of dialogue but it's a porno so..." She trailed off with a casual shrug.

"You're going to have sex with Riku?" the brunette gaped.

Kairi nodded. "Well yeah, it's in the script." she smiled, shuffling her feet shyly. "He's pretty good at it too."

Sora blushed. Seriously, the things that came out of these people's mouths were personal enough make his ears burn for days. "I wouldn't have thought that you would-" he stopped before continuing. Would she take offense to it? Some people reacting to things differently.

"I understand, I don't look like a adult movie actor." She shrugged again. "But I am one."

"What made you want to do this?" the brunette asked.

Kairi tilted her head left and right, giving the question some consideration. "I don't know. Maybe I was bored. There's no special reason for it if that's what you were thinking."

That was his general thought process; that she was here because of some back story. For some reason it didn't occur to him that someone would wake up one day and say: I want to have sex for a living. "Boredom lead you to this?" he repeated incredulously.

"Yeah, I know right?" she giggled. "I don't know what I was thinking." she eyed him curiously. "So when will you start acting?"

He blushed. "As soon as I can stop blushing like a school girl I guess." She laughed again. Maybe he wasn't doing as bad as he thought. To be honest, if he was still in school he would have jumped at a chance to date a girl like this. Would he still jump knowing her work history? Probably; after spending some time talking to her she seemed like a okay girl. They do say that you shouldn't judge a book by their cover. "Do you want to grab a drink together?"

the redhead blinked for a moment, as if the question caught her by surprise. Then she smiled and it was brilliant. "Sure, I've got nothing else to do." She settled herself intimately against his side, snaking her arm through his with a soft pat. "Come on Newbie, I'll show you where the break room is. When you get your first check I want a real drink though."

Sora laughed, his heart leaping with excitement. "Deal."

She led the way, talking casually the entire trek. She was a only child and instead of going to one of those stuffy colleges like her parents wanted, she was doing this. It started out as a curiosity thing at first, and then evolved into something she enjoyed. It was amazing how people came from all walks of life. "What about you?" she said, pushing the door open to a small room. It was tiny, but cozy at the same time. There was a table of snacks, plenty of water and a few chairs to lounge in.

"I just really needed the money." he answered. She leaned in curiously, expecting a continuation. Sora quickly turned his head to avoid that gaze.

After a moment her face softened with a look of understanding. "I'm sorry," she began, "I didn't mean to pry." After a awkward bit of silence, she went to the counter of snacks and grabbed two bags of chips and soda. "I was just curious because you're new." She held them out like a offering, along with a friendly smile

He took them gratefully. "No, it's my fault." after a moment his lips tilted up into a half smile. "I just don't really like talking about it."

"Fair enough." The two sat together in comfortable silence that was occasionally broken by her chatting. It seemed to be a thing, Sora noted. Kairi didn't like long pauses of silence. Instead of personal information she began giving details about some of the staff. Terra was using the money he earned to help pay for something. At night he took classes at the local college. Their Director Reno had wanted to direct movies but fell short and was now doing low budget porn films.

"Terra's in college?" the brunette repeated. Then again it wasn't that impossible. He had the body of a football player. Maybe under normal circumstances he would have been one too.

"Oh yeah, I forgot what he's going for though." the redhead giggled. "Something that requires a lot of brains no doubt."

There was a knock on the door and a second later Riku poked his head in. "Hey, you guys were in here the whole time?"

Kairi grinned at him. "Yeah, you done with Terra?"

He shrugged. "Looks like it; he's no longer being a pain in my ass." The redhead giggled and Sora blushed. How the hell do you laugh about something that hurts? The silver haired teen grabbed him some water before taking a seat next to Sora. "I'm going to get you to lighten up one way or another." he grinned.

Sora shook his head. "It's just some of the things you say. I don't think I'll ever get used to them." he glanced over shyly. "Are you okay? You looked tired the last time I saw you."

"I'm fine. I promise."

"The next scene is with you and Kairi."

"Jealous?"

"N-no! Why would you say that!" Sora shoved him playful, Riku yelped and pushed back in return while Kairi sat back and laughed. The boys wrestled, ending with Riku pinning Sora's smaller frame to the floor.

"Winner, Winner!" the redhead cheered and the giggles started again. "You two are a mess." she managed after the fun died down. "I should really go get ready though. My Scene is coming up."

"I'll catch up in a bit." Riku said.

She smiled at Sora. "You still owe me that drink."

He nodded. "No problem." She waved before making her exit. The two boys were left alone.

"So you met Kairi." Riku started.

"Yeah, she's really great."

"Do you like her?"

The brunette shrugged his shoulders. "Maybe, I don't know. She's really cute though." Riku didn't answer instead he nodded. Whether or not this was in agreement or not, Sora didn't know. Did he like Kairi as a friend? Yeah, she seemed harmless enough. Maybe if they hung out more he would even like her as a potential girlfriend.

They sat for a moment while Riku munched on his snacks and downed water. Was he angry about something? It was hard to tell, but Sora knew that he didn't want the closest thing to a friend angry at him. He opened his mouth to say something and then his cellphone rang.

Riku paused, their eyes met and slowly the brunette removed the phone from his pocket. He looked at the number and paled. "What is it?" Riku asked.

"It's my mom." The response was so soft Riku had to lean in to hear well. "I need to go."

Reno took the news of the boys needing to leave better than Riku had expected. Honestly, he was expecting the redhead to throw a damned fit; he had a scene coming up after all. He was basically asking to skip out on work. "No problem, I'm behind in editing anyway." He had said, before waving them off dismissively.

That was all he needed to hear before quickly herding Sora to his car. The brunette had said nothing since he hung up the phone. The most he managed to get was that he needed to get to the hospital. Riku managed to get the name and the address and started the drive.

"Your mom's in the hospital?"

"She is." Nothing; Riku waited, expecting more but there was nothing.

"I'm sorry to hear that." Again there was only silence. He groaned, his hands gripping tightly at the steering wheel. "This is going to be a long drive if you don't say anything."

"I'm sorry, there's just a lot on my mind right now."

He nodded; guess that was something that should be respected. Hospital visits can be stressful things. It's just that he was worried. Never before had Sora been so distant. Sure, the brunette had his occasional slumps, but this was a complete downward spiral. Riku just wasn't used to not being able to get a response out of him.

Traffic wasn't a problem on the freeway so the pair managed to cross town quickly to reach their destination. Riku parked and got out with Sora leading the way. The Hospital was like most, tall with large windows and filled with sick people. No matter how you tried to dress it up, there was always that same feeling. There was no amount of paint or decorations that could take away that cold almost too clean feeling.

The brunette didn't stop at the desk; he walked in and went straight for the elevators. So his mother already had a room here? Sora had been with him for a few days now and he hadn't mentioned a thing. There were so many things Riku wanted to ask but he knew better. If Sora didn't feel like talking in the car, that probably wouldn't have changed now that they were here.

The elevator ride was short. The car soared up at a speed that left him feeling dizzy. When the door opened, Sora stepped out to the nurses' station and made a right. A few greeted him with smiles and hellos that he faintly returned. So they knew him by name? His mother had been here for a while then.

He kept walking, passing cookie cutter rooms with patients and workers until he came to the end of the hall. Tucked away in the corner was a door. Just outside of it was a cozy little common area, probably for families to rest. Hospitals weren't always the most relaxing places, with their tiny rooms and uncomfortable accommodations but the common areas could provide you at least some open room to breathe. Sora sucked in a deep breath, released it, and entered inside.

The room was dark and the blinds were closed. The only light came from the television. There was a bed against the wall. "Mom?" he called softly.

Riku closed the door behind them and followed. The woman in the bed was a brunette with Sora's eyes. The only difference was that while he was a healthy teen, she was incredibly frail. She turned her head, eyes fluttering from the drugs being pumped into her through the IV drip. "Hey Baby." She sighed, reaching with her right hand. Sora, instantly grabbed it. "I didn't mean to bother you but the doctor said this was important." She smiled.

"You're never a bother to me." He answered. "I'm glad you called. I did what I said I would do. I got a job."

"You do? What is it?"

His face faltered. "I-I work in-" How do you even form you lips to tell your mother something like that?

"Sales." Riku interrupted. "It's nice to meet you. I'm Riku." He smiled.

It took her a moment to focus but when she did she gave him the same motherly look. "Riku? You work with Sora?" she paused, to lay back on her pillows for a bit. "Thank you for taking care of my boy."

"No problem."

"What did you need mom?"

She paused for a bit. "I know this isn't something you'd like to talk about, I wanted to tell you in person." She gave her son's hand a squeeze. "You understand that right?"

"What is it?"

"They're not sure if my treatments are working." she began. "At a certain point if there's no improvement they're just going to try to make me comfortable." It started slowly and Riku watched. Sora quietly slid his hand from his mother's, letting it fall to his side. He just stood there, face contorting while several different emotions fought for dominance on his face. His mother closed her eyes as if watching her son's silent battle was just as painful for her as it was for him. In the end he broke down and left the room, leaving the door to swing close behind him.

So this was it. This was the deep dark secret that had lead him onto the set of one of Reno's productions. His mother was probably in the middle of chemotherapy or radiation. On top of that it seemed like she was dying. Riku approached the bed carefully and touched the hand his companion had just abandoned. "Don't give up just yet. I know it's rough but part of the battle is mental."

She smiled and gave his fingers a good squeeze, the strength in that simple gesture surprised and brought a smile to his lips. "Thank you."
He headed for the door. This was the thing that brought Sora to him. Of all the things, he would have never guessed. To be fair, the only thing the boy would say was that he needed money. Riku paused once, glancing back at the bed before turning to follow his distraught friend into the hallway. "Sora." he called after the brunette's retreating form. "Sora wait for a second!"

When his request was ignored, Riku jogged after him, closing the distance quickly. "Hey wait up." He latched onto Sora's arm, using it to yank the boy backwards.

Sora turned quickly, his blue eyes filled with tears. The sight was enough to make his heart ache. "Come here." Riku coaxed gently, arms open. Sora chose that moment to break, throwing his body into the awaiting embrace so that he could cry into Riku's shoulder. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

There was nothing else Riku could say at that moment to take the pain away. So he repeated those simple words over and over again like a soft mantra. They stood there together just like that, not caring about random strangers that would pass by and see them. He held on to the boy's smaller frame and let him shake all his grief and tears out in the form of soft sobs. "Hey, come on Sora. Look at me, you're not alone in this okay?" he lifted the boy's chin gently. "I won't leave you alone."

And that was the honest truth. The brunette nodded solemnly and wiped at his eyes. "I barely know you though. I don't understand why."

Riku smiled. "I think from the first time I saw you I knew I'd probably do anything for you. You just drew me straight to you."

"Why?!" he shouted, stomping his foot in frustration. Was that a mini tantrum? God he was cute.

Sadly there was no answer for that, or at least not a good one that would make Sora feel better. So instead of words the silver haired teen chose action. He pulled the brunette to him and went straight for those pouting, trembling lips. Sora tensed up to protest but Riku held him firm, deepening their kiss until he melted into it. What started out as one sided quickly between a battle for dominance. Sora leaned into it, feeding at Riku as if he could drink him down until there was nothing left.

He needed a lifeline, something strong and steady that he could hold on to. Most of all he needed to be held and told that everything would be okay, even if those words were lies. They broke apart breathless. Sora wiped at his eyes. "It's okay." Riku repeated. "Look, tomorrow I'm checking out of the hotel and going to my house. You've been with me for this long and I haven't done you anything. You might as well stick around a little longer." He whipped at his friends face with his hands.

"I can't pay you." Sora mumbled miserably.

"I don't want anything from you. I just want to help."

He released his breath with one long sigh, and with that breath all the tension in his body went with it. He leaned forward and rested his head on Riku's chest. "Thank you."

There was no need to answer. So instead Riku folded Sora back into the safety of his arms. It would be alright. He'd make sure of it.

Author's Rambles

Ah...I'm so terrible with the deadlines I set for myself. What happened to the update once a week rule? Sadly I didn't want to post this. It just didn't sound anywhere near what I wanted it to sound. No amount of rewrite seemed to be able to fix that either. Funny thing, I did get to write some of this in a hospital. I would sit in the common area in the hallway and giggle to myself as I thought about that sad little scene. Oh the irony.

Anyway, I introduced Kairi. Someone mentioned that I should bring Sephiroth into this. My goodness some of you guys think more about these things than I do. It wasn't my intention to bring him in though. I figured he might be too old maybe? Since all the actors so far have been around the late teen and early 20 age bracket.

Who knows, he might pop up if I can figure out what to do with him.