Chapter 36 - The Miracle of Resurrection

As I opened my eyes I could still feel the sensation of air rushing past my face. What was strange was that it was going in the wrong direction. Tilting my head slightly to the side I saw the cliff face, the rock that I had just fallen from, speeding away from me.

Suddenly the surface I was lying on rocked violently. As I turned my head slowly to the other side I saw to my amazement that it wasn't even a surface at all. It was a bird. It's gigantic wings beat once more and I rocked from side to side. Now I was fully conscious again the pain came back with a vengeance. Reaching my hand up to clutch my throbbing chest I screwed my eyes tightly shut and tried to figure out what had happened. I wasn't dead. Lydia, I presumed, was - judging by the fact the rest of the sky was empty. Somehow this giant bird had appeared out of nowhere, swooped down and caught me, inadvertently saving my life. I wondered if I was dreaming. As the bird's wings flapped again I realised that we were now flying over the thickened forest. As we dipped the branches scratched against my face, making me groan out in pain but not have the energy to do anything else. We plunged down into the darkness, the bird slowing down its beating until suddenly we landed on the ground with a small thud.

The sound of the forest was quiet. Only the buzzing of insects could be heard, possibly the whir of cameras too. Everyone would be watching this now - goodness knows what they would be thinking. No tribute had ever had their life saved by an animal before - it was pretty much unheard of them to do anything other than kill. The bird flattened itself against the ground, taking great care not to hurt me, and then gently rolled my body onto the grass. I groaned, clutching my broken ribs and not moving my head, even when it pressed into the soil and prevented me from breathing. My head was pounding and I still didn't feel completely alive. This didn't make any sense. As I lay there motionless I felt the whoosh of air again as the creature that had saved my life lifted off and disappeared through the trees. It was as if it had never been there.

For a while nothing happened. If any tribute had stumbled across me I would have seemed dead - I barely had the strength to respond to the pain wracking through my body. Every part of me hurt, from my head right down to the tips of my toes. For some reason I was a little disappointed - I had almost been ready for death. The feeling of falling had released me, lifted away all my troubles and guided me into eternal silence. Now however, everything had returned. I felt the wetness of the grass against my skin, the sun only able to filter slightly through the thick undergrowth of this denser part of the forest. When I heard the sound of crashing and approaching voices, I didn't even try to register who it was.

"Sam? SAM!" As the pounding of feet got closer I suddenly felt my body being wrenched over onto my back, air rushing into my lungs so I coughed and spluttered.
"Sam! Oh Sam!" It was Blaine. His face was still bloody and his eyes red from crying, but he seemed relieved. Without thinking I raised up my hand to touch his cheek, but another wave of pain rushed through me and I cried out instead.
"Jethro! Help him!" As the District 11 tribute appeared next to my boyfriend he immediately ushered him back slightly, crouching over me and staring at my face.
"He may have a spinal injury." He said, sounding focused and calculated. "It's important that we do not touch him."
"Is he alright?" I could feel my consciousness fading again, my vision becoming fuzzy as the voices all merged into one. Stacey suddenly appeared and had to be held back by Blaine, both of them hugging each other tightly as they cried and watched me fade into blackness.

It was quiet again when I awoke once more. For a second I was reminded of when I had fallen in the snow back in District 12. Back then I had not expected to be saved - this felt rather similar. The pain in my body seemed to have numbed, when I tilted my head upwards I saw my chest covered in leaves and my clothes ripped open. Upon my stirring a figure suddenly rose and rushed towards me. Blaine did not look like he had slept, but when he smiled it was genuine happiness.
"Sam?" He whispered. I managed a smile, reaching out my hand for his so he clutched it and pressed a kiss to my palm.
"You're alive." He whispered again, almost like he was unable to believe it. I couldn't get my head around it either.

Blaine's movements seemed to have woken others up - as Camille made her way over I saw the relief on her face too.
"The ointment seems to be working." She said. As I glanced down at my body again I realised that this must be the work of sponsors.
"The parachute arrived about an hour after we found you. Must have cost a lot of money. Don't know how they managed to pay for that bird though." So it hadn't been a dream. I really had been saved by a gigantic bird. It didn't seem logical. Everything about the Games was designed for killing, the only times tributes were saved was by each other. Why was I still here? Camille lifted up a few of the leaves to check my wounds and made approving noises. Whatever it was it was working miracles. If I had had a spinal injury there would almost have been no point in me continuing.
"When they cut that bridge." Blaine suddenly said, reaching out his hand to gently stroke the hair from my face. "I thought… I thought…" He bit his lip, unable to continue. I squeezed his hand again but felt the exertion tire me. My eyes fluttered and Blaine looked concerned.
"Camille?" The District 11 victor came back over but smiled again.
"He is strong." She said. "So strong…"

Several hour later I was able to move my arms and legs. Jethro wouldn't let me sit up, but I was able to talk again. Somehow the shock had rendered me completely speechless - maybe my voice box was still trying to catch up with the realisation that I was still alive. Stacey and Blaine had sat either side of me, both clutching onto one of my hands and looking worried whenever I did anything abnormal. For a while I had struggled to know which way to look, eventually prompting Stacey to move and sit next to my boyfriend, resting her head on his shoulder as she gazed down at me.

"Lydia is dead." Jethro said plainly, poking the fire as he passed and coming to sit down beside us. The forest we were situated in was so thick the trees shrouded us convincingly. "The Capitol anthem just proved it". I looked up at the small parts of darkened sky I could see and wondered what District 1 was thinking now. They had nobody left to fight for. One tribute had betrayed them, and the other had been betrayed themselves. I had replayed that final scene in my mind a few times - the look on Linus' face as he had resigned us to our fate. Part of him had seemed gleeful. but the other had also been sad. Had he really meant what he had said about me? Was that why him and Trix had not previously intervened?
"Are you alright?" Blaine asked, sensing my change in feelings.
"Why didn't Trix and Linus fight?" I asked. "When they were attacking us? Why did they sit back?"
"I guess they didn't think it was worth it." Jethro replied. I imagined he hadn't seen a lot of the fight, but he knew the other victors well. "The Careers always enjoy a good fight, but only when the odds favour them." I scoffed. Odds. When were the odds ever in our favour.
"They could've taken us though." Blaine continued, still sounding confused. "It was five to two. They just watched."
"They must have had another motive." A crack of a twig made us all freeze, Blaine, Jethro and Camille all jerking their heads to see what it was.
"Must be the fire." Jethro muttered, almost to convince himself.
"Where is Hunter?" I asked after a short while. I saw the twinge in Blaine's face, the look of disappointment as he noted my concern, but he still replied.
"He went hunting. 'Didn't want to sit around doing nothing' he said." As I smiled I saw Blaine's face darken and squeezed his hand to show it meant nothing. To be honest I was surprised Hunter had even stuck around. If I had really died our team would have been a mess, I'm not sure he would have been able to stick it out. I was alive, but fairly useless. Would he want to protect us?
"It's going to take a few days for you to be mobile again." Jethro said, trying to steer the conversation away from Blaine's favourite person. "Even then you won't be up to full strength, but that fall broke a lot of your bones. You're lucky to be alive." For the first time in a while, I completely agreed with him.

Hunter did return. When he saw me awake he simply nodded his head, making some kind of joke about how I was back from the dead. I noticed a strange sense of apprehension in his manner towards me - noticed it in everyone apart from Blaine and Stacey. They all knew how unheard of it was to be saved, and feared the reasons why just as much as I did.

I didn't know how long had passed when I finally made it to my feet, but it seemed like several days. My body was stiff, every movement disjointed and still a little painful. Blaine helped to hold me up but he needed Jethro too after a while. After all we had been through it was easy to forget that he too had suffered greatly. As I adjusted to the new sensations and tried to get my limbs moving again, my thought immediately turned to the tributes still left in the games. There had been only one canon since the death of Lydia - Victor. The shriek that had echoed across the arena had frightened us all, but it had been far away. I only hoped that if we ever did come across Violet again, that her vengeance would have died down.

"What is our plan?" I asked. Jethro looked at me in confusion.
"Our plan?"
"Yes." I replied. "Where do we head to? What is our strategy?" The District 11 victor laughed.
"Our plan is to stay alive." He said. "And to keep everyone safe." My face scrunched up in frustration. Had they forgotten the rules of the Games? There was only one winner - pretty soon the numbers would start to dwindle and what then? At some point killing each other would cross our minds. I had no desire for anyone to die, but if they did, I did not want it to be at the hands of a Career.
"I think we should head to the Career camp." I said, speaking a little more forcefully. Jethro laughed again.
"You are in no state to be fighting Careers." He said, sounding like a parent scolding their child. "Neither are any of us."
"We are all capable of defending ourselves." I replied again, feeling my anger begin to grow. Blaine placed a comforting arm on my shoulder but I shrugged it away. "We wouldn't be here if we weren't."
"Nobody is attacking us here. Why should we move? Let the big players fight it out, we will be ready once their attentions turn." As Jethro turned away to resume cooking breakfast I realised the shift that had occurred. He was the leader of our group now.
"Sam…" Blaine began, seeing the clenching of my fists. His head moved to place a light kiss to my cheek, but I pushed him away once more.
"I want to be alone." I said, stalking off into the undergrowth.

As you moved further through the forest, the darkness began to diminish. We must have been fairly close to the edge, maybe even near the Career camp. I couldn't understand why Jethro didn't want to know what was out there - was he scared? Surely keeping tabs on our enemies was the best plan, that way we knew when they were coming. To wait seemed pointless.

As I stopped by the base of a fairly sturdy looking tree, I saw that it's trunk plunged deep into the ground. It was difficult to remember that we were actually hundreds of feet in the air - the Gamemakers had done such a good job of constructing the arena that it was only when you reached the edges of these patches of ground that you remembered the truth. Looking up at the sky I remembered the tree I had climbed at the start of the Games - the cornucopia I had seen from a distance. Reaching up my hand I grabbed hold of a thick branch and tried to haul myself up. My chest immediately stabbed with pain, causing me to jerk my arm out, snap the branch and fall down in the process. My face hit the floor with a thud.
"Smooth." As I looked up into the trees my eyes scanned frantically, looking for the person.
"Hello?"
"I'm up here you idiot." The sound of rustling was followed by a body dropping softly down to the branch in a nearby tree closest to me. "You know broken ribs don't really help with climbing." I scowled. Hunter laughed, swinging on the branch above him effortlessly, almost like he was teasing me.
"I'm better now." I replied, trying to regain my composure. Hunter smiled.
"Ah yes, the Capitol and their magical potions. It's a shame they don't do one for this little organ." He tapped the side of his head, looking slightly amused, but slightly sad. "There's plenty I'd like to get rid of in here." I could see a bow an arrow in his hands, probably stolen from Blaine. A part of me admired Hunter's complete brashness in the face of all we had experienced, a part of me thought he was stupid.
"Are you out hunting again?" I asked.
"Yup. Someone's gotta help us eat eh? All your little friends wanna do is sit there and play house."
"Exactly!" I threw my hands up in the air, glad someone had finally said what I had been thinking. Hunter laughed.
"The patient finally got bored of his doctors?"
"We should be out there, hunting those Careers down before they do it to us." I said, rising to my feet and pointing to the edge of the forest. Hunter seemed amused but didn't say anything. "We know what we're doing, we're not fourteen year olds hiding from the trained killers-"
"-We are trained killers." Suddenly I stopped. Hunter noticed my realisation, sitting down on his branch and watching.
"It's ok." He said, almost sounding comforting. "We are. You trained for these Games right?" I nodded my head. "We all did. We trained to kill. And we know how to. Apart from your little sister over there, every one of us has killed someone." My mind flashed back to the bloodbath, seeing Niamh lying motionless on the floor, Cassandra's severed arm still lifelessly clinging to my ankle. "I killed a begging girl, Jethro let people poison themselves. Your boyfriend even slit the throats of the people he was supposed to be allies with." As I remembered the face of Sebastian's brother, the one that had ambushed us on the train back to District 12, I realised how much destruction Blaine and I had caused. Not just to each other.
"We're killers now. That's what those people out there don't realise." Hunter dropped to the ground. He walked over to me, staring intently and tapping his head again. "Something happens to you in here. Something sick and twisted. People think that when you leave the arena everything's ok - they fix you up and you go on living like nothing happened. But it did. The killing changed you. Sometimes, when you look in that fancy mirror some Capitol prick that's selling you for money and sex bought you, in your fancy Capitol pad that's far away from anywhere you feel comfortable in - sometimes you don't even see your reflection. You just see a monster." In a flash everything changed. Suddenly I wasn't in the woods anymore. Suddenly I was by a river. The water was flowing quickly, but out of nowhere it began to turn red. I reached out my hand to touch it, but saw them stained with blood. It was everywhere, on hands, my arms, my chest. I stuck out my tongue and tasted it on my lips. As I looked down into the water, trying to see my reflection, trying to see if this was really me, suddenly a face popped up from under the water. A cold lifeless, dead face. Kurt.

I screamed. Turning I hurtled back through the trees, feeling the branches whip against my face and my chest ache, but not caring. When I entered into the camp again Blaine almost crashed into me, holding out his arms and pulling me in towards him.
"What happened?" He said. "What happened?"
"The monster." I replied, my whole body shaking and my hands rubbing against my head, trying to block it out. "The monster, it's me, I killed him, the monster, the monster…" Blaine wrapped his arms around me tighter, rocking me back and forth until my panic died and I felt my strength fading again.

It was nearly dark again when I awoke. Blaine's face was in front of mine, his body curled up against me and his arms draped protectively across my waist. As I leant my face forward and kissed him he opened his eyes quickly, concerned again.
"Sam?" He said instinctively. I smiled, running my hand through his hair.
"It's ok." I replied. Blaine looked at me carefully for a couple of seconds, before his body finally relaxed and he kissed me again.
"Are you alright?" He asked me when we broke away. "Before you were…" My face darkened with the memory. Blaine gripped onto my hand tightly, as if scared that I would break down again, but I stayed strong.
"It's ok…" I replied again, unsure if I could say anything else "…Now." Blaine shuffled closer, wrapping himself protectively around me.
"Hunter hasn't returned." He said, sounding more than a little glad. "After what happened." I was a little too. I know he hadn't meant to harm me, but for now it was good to keep him away.
"Where is Stacey?" I asked, glancing away towards the direction of the fire.
"With Camille. They make quite a pair." Focusing my eyes I could pick out the two of them sitting together, Camille showing Stacey how to skin an animal they had just caught. There was concentration in Stacey's eyes as she watched, but she also sat close to her teacher, elbows touching. It was easy to forget she was only 16 - still in need of a motherly figure to guide her. I wondered what our own mother was going through right now, how she had coped with seeing her son nearly die and her only daughter face danger every day. It was a wonder she had managed to survive. Although I suppose I didn't know that.

Shaking away the thought I turned back to Blaine. The tiredness in his face was still evident - always worrying about me. It seemed ridiculous to think that we had both escaped death, had both sought the thing that had destroyed us to bring us closer together again. The curls in his closely cropped hair were beginning to come back, reminding me of when we had held each other in the Capitol train and I had run my fingers through them, our one moment truly alone. Suddenly I felt a desire for that unity again. Moving my head forward carefully, I pressed my lips to Blaine's, feeling his initial hesitation melt away almost immediately. After a few seconds he seemed to expect my retreat, but when I deepened the kiss and shuffled my hips in closer his eyes widened.
"Sam…" He managed to gasp out in a small breath, partly seeking confirmation and partly unable to contain himself.
"I want you." I whispered back, my breathing shallow but my words firm. After that we lost all composure. Blaine kissed me deeper than before, scrabbling with his hands for my back and wrapping them around me tightly. Our broken bodies pressed together, scars against scars, bone against bone. My own hands reached up the back of his shirt, feeling the rough skin and then slipping round to his ribs and his stomach. Blaine moaned softly and pushed them lower, his own fingers slipping under my waistband. The arena was a distant memory, the cameras and the thousands of people watching us drifting away until it was only us, alone in that room again, together.

A shrill scream rang through the forest.