Chapter One

"Don't Leave Me"

It was 9:00 on a Monday night, and JJ, Derek Morgan, and Aaron Hotchner were still at the BAU working on some case files. On her way out of the office, JJ stopped to talk to Morgan for a moment.

"Hey, can I talk to you about something?" JJ asked him.

"Yeah, of course. What's been buggin' ya? I could tell something's been off all day," Morgan responded.

JJ took a breath and asked, "Does something feel off about Spencer calling in sick? I've been really worried about him since Tobias Hankel did what he did."

"We've all been worried, and you know how Reid feels about that. Besides, he probably is just feeling sick, and Hotch did say he sounded pretty bad on the phone," he responded, "But if something feels off, go follow your instincts."

JJ nodded, "I think I'll just stop by his place on my way home to see if he needs anything."

"Are you sure you aren't just looking for an excuse to go see him? Everyone knows you have a crush on Pretty Boy. Well, everyone but him," Morgan laughed.

JJ just rolled her eyes and walked out to the elevator to leave.

Twenty minutes later, JJ was parking her car in front of Reid's apartment. She went up and knocked on the door.

When he didn't answer, she called out, "Hey, Spence. It's me. I just want to make sure you're ok and see if you need anything."

After a couple more moments, she dug her key to his apartment out of her purse to let herself into his apartment. He could have been asleep, but JJ wouldn't feel relieved until she knew for sure. When she saw the scene on the other side of the door, she immediately called 911.

"911. How may I help you?" the operator said

"Officer down," JJ said along with Reid's address unable to say anything more.

JJ bent over Reid to check his pulse. It was faint, but it was still there. She looked around the room and saw bottles of Dilaudid and syringes scattered around. She also saw an envelope on the couch addressed to her. She realized that the envelope probably contained a suicide letter.

"Oh, Spence. Why did you do this?" she said with tears streaming down her cheeks.

Shortly after, the ambulance arrived. As they strapped Reid onto the stretcher, JJ tucked the suicide letter safely into her purse.

It only took the ambulance five minutes to arrive at the hospital, and Reid was immediately wheeled away.

"We'll let you know how he is as soon as we know," the doctor told JJ.

She couldn't find the words to thank him, so she just nodded and took a seat in the waiting room.

She knew she'd have to call the rest of the team, but curiosity won as she pulled the letter from her purse and read:
"My Dearest Jennifer,

I wish it hadn't come to this. I wish I could have been stronger, for you and for me. I just couldn't take it anymore. Tobias Hankel got me addicted to Dilaudid, and I hate him for it. I hate myself more for not being able to give it up. I've tried so many times, Jennifer, but I just couldn't do it anymore. I know this is probably the most cowardly way to tell you, but I love you, Jennifer. I'm sorry I'm doing this to you, but I just wasn't strong enough.

Love always,

Spence

It took every last bit of energy JJ had left to keep herself from completely breaking down. Just then, the doctor came back out, and JJ could tell by the look on his face that he didn't have good news.

"Miss Jareau, I'm sorry to tell you this, but Dr. Reid is in a coma. We're trying to keep his body strong enough to fight off the Dilaudid. He may not make it through the night, however. You can come and see him now."

"Yes, thank you," JJ said not knowing how else to respond following the doctor to the room where Reid was.

As she was walking, she called Morgan who picked up after only two rings.

"Hey, JJ. Is Pretty Boy ok?" he asked.

"Derek, call the rest of the team and tell them to get to the hospital," she said as her voice cracked, "Spence tried to kill himself. He many not make it through the night."

"Oh, man. Sure thing, JJ. We'll all be there soon," he said before hanging up to call the rest of the team.

JJ entered the room and started crying all over again when she saw Reid's lifeless body. She had nearly lost him once and was terrified she was going to lose him forever this time.

She leaned over him, kissed him on the forehead, and whispered in his ear, "Don't leave me."