The wild goose chase he'd been on for the last three days had long since become exasperating. This latest clue in his seemingly neverending game of chase with the Master was the last piece of the puzzle he needed to figure out where the Master was and what he was doing this time and what sort of weapons he might need in order to deal with the problem.

The Doctor sighed when he realized where the clues were leading him. Apparently, despite the fact that he'd tangled himself in the plots of dozens of aliens and assorted higher beings, The Master was bored. It was the only reason he could think for why the other Time Lord had decided to terrorize a carnival of all things. Suppressing the desire to bang his head against the nearest solid surface, he got to work.

"Let's go Brigadier." he said with a sigh as he hopped into Bessie and started her up. Jo was doing something or other, and the Brigadier had nothing better to do, so he would be his assistant this evening.

After a bit of the drive, they arrived at the traveling carnival that the Master had made the latest target of the aggression that was born of his insanity. As they were getting out of the car, a young man appeared in the parking lot and ran straight for the Brigadier.

"I think we might have a Code Brown sir." the young man said.

"What the devil are you playing at? There is no such thing as a Code Brown." the Brigadier replied.

"The Doctor is here." the young man said.

"I can see that." the Brigadier replied.

"So is the Doctor, and the Doctor, and the Doctor, and the Doctor, and the Doctor. And, I can't be sure, but I think I ran into the Doctor." the young man said.

"Speak sense man." the Brigadier said as there was an exclamation of "Oh, shit." behind him.

The Brigadier turned to stop and stare as he'd never ever heard the Doctor swear before.

"What? It accurately sums up the situation." the Doctor replied. "It took me, me and me to deal with Omega. I'd hate to see what sort of problem would take me, me, me, me, me, me, and me to deal with it."

The Brigadier paused, and paled as the implications set in.

"Code Brown indeed." he said as he followed after the Doctor who'd waded into the carnival with little hesitation.

As he reached the Doctor's side he heard a loud exclamation of "Master!"

"I should've known the Master would be involved in this!" the Doctor exclaimed as he rounded a corner.

The Master was indeed there, furiously scrubbing at his lips as if they were contaminated. A brown haired man in a brown jacket with leather patches on the sleeves and a bowtie grabbed the Master's arm and said "Come along Master, River's wanted to meet you for a long while.". Another man with messy brown hair who was in a suit, sneakers, and a long brown coat grabbed the Master's other arm and said "But, I was going to take him on the Waltzer before the disaster strikes!"

The two men who looked to be about to get into a fight over who would monopolize the Master's time and where they'd take him when they did so promptly stopped when the Doctor arrived on the scene.

"Don't look now, but Austin Powers has just arrived." the man in the suit, grubby sneakers, and the coat said.

"Quick! Hide him before River sees!" the man in the jacket and bowtie said, letting go of the Master.

"Before I see what sweetie?" a woman with wild golden curls who was wearing a gold top and a short and tight skirt to go with it asked.

"Oh, nothing, just an old acquaintance of mine, a former consultant for UNIT who..." the man in the jacket and bowtie started as the woman who was presumably River walked up to the Doctor and started thoroughly inspecting him.

"When we get back to the Tardis, we're going to be having a discussion about where you've been hiding this portion of your wardrobe." the golden haired woman with the untamed curls said once her inspection of the Doctor was complete, an inspection that had involved her getting into his personal space and inspecting a great deal more than the clothes much to the Doctor's discomfort.

"I dumped it in the back in between the boxes that contained my Cricket equipment and my scarf collection." the man with the bowtie and the man in the suit, coat and sneakers replied simultaneously.

"I can state with a great deal of certainty that my sartorial tastes have not improved over the years. The only thing I can think of that's worse than what you two are wearing is that ill-kept mess that my prior self called clothing." the Doctor said disapprovingly as he eyed the two men before him with an air of distaste.

"Speaking of sartorial missteps and messes, remember that neon coat that looked like it came from the wrong end of a rainbow?" the man in the long coat asked.

"How could I forget? The day I burned it was probably the best in my life, and it's over there by the way." the man in the bowtie said as he pointed towards the clown in the yellow trousers.

"There's more than one way to cook a cat." the man in the long brown coat said.

"Peri never let me live that one down." the man in the bowtie said.

Both men looked at each-other, back at the blond clown, and back at each other.

"So, do you want to...?" the man in the long coat asked.

"I never liked him anyway." the man in the bowtie replied.

"Alright, let's make his evening a living hell, seeing as ours soon will be." the man in the long coat said.

"Here kitty, kitty, kitty." the man in the bowtie said as he approached the clown while the other man snickered.

"What was that all about?" a rather disturbed looking Master who'd apparently not gotten while the getting was good asked.

"Those two who were apparently fighting over you were both apparently me. So is the man in the technicolor crime against taste, good sense, and sanity." the Doctor replied "I've also heard from a reliable source that several more of me are also here."

"Oh, sh...I think I'll just be scrapping my plan, taking my new henchmen, and...bye." the Master said before leaving with as much haste as was seemly, looking as if he would be flat out screaming and running for the hills if it was in his character.

As the Master disappeared into the night, a white haired old man watched two brown haired men pick on a blond who was giving as good as he got and hoped his suspicions weren't true. Unfortunately, he'd heard the name repeated on the night air, and amongst the crowds he'd passed through he'd seen his father's ears, his mother's nose, and his uncle's eyes. He was now looking at someone who had his Great-Grandfather's unfortunate dress sense, and one of the other men in the loose trio looked a great deal like that crazy cousin of his who had gone around licking everything while the other reminded him of that aunt who'd had a habit of kissing everyone.

Great, he wasn't just going to be replaced with a clown and a dandy, he was going to be replaced with all of his lunatic relatives as well.

Apparently, he hadn't run from the Untempered Schism before it had driven him insane as he'd thought he'd had.

Elsewhere, a man who had - if one went by his vest and umbrella - apparently raided The Riddler's winter wardrobe wandered unaware of who else was in the immediate vicinity, though he had the niggling suspicion that something was wrong.