hey Snow again... and so soon! enjoy the second update~

also first person pov yayyyy

I pulled my knees to my chest, not bothering to take off the mask. My whole body hurt, and I was scared. I hated to admit it, even to myself, especially to others. The ninja couldn't be scared. He had to be the hero, to protect.

But there were times that it was terrifying. And not just from things like my phobia of chickens.

What if I failed?

Cold fingers twisted my insides and a hiccup escaped my lips past my control. I did my best to be quiet. The last thing I wanted was for someone to find the ninja crying in a janitor's closet. Humiliation was not another feeling I wanted to add to the list. What I had was enough. Even if I only ever showed the happy ones. The easy ones.

The strong ones.

Sobs racked my body, and tears spilled from my eyes onto the red lines of my mask.

At least nobody would be able to see the evidence.

Something soft touched the small section of my cheek exposed and I jumped in surprise. Arms flinging out, I stared wide eyed at my scarf. It moved on its own, wiping my tears away and lightly rubbing my cheek. The tightness in my chest eased and a bit of the cold was chased away with soothing warmth.

Nomicon.

It wasn't often that it would manifest outside of the book. And it was only through the scarf or suit. Still, control was limited and not when I was full control myself.

Like now while I was sobbing on the dirty floor of the closet.

A tired, yet relieved, smile pulled my lips up. My eyes closed and I leaned against the wall, letting the soft, gentle touches relax me. These were the times I somehow enjoyed the most. Despite it being my breakdowns that brought them, I yearned for it. I craved the tender touches, affection, and comfort.

By a book.

I really was going off the deep end.

My scarf did one final, gentle pat on my cheek before falling slowly to my side. Nomicon felt when I had calmed down, retreating from controlling my scarf.

Sliding my hands up under the material covering my face, I closed my eyes as the red lights flashed and the suit disappeared into the mask once more. With a glance to my backpack on the ground next to me, I smiled softly, wiping the few remaining tears away and standing.

I opened the door to the closet, feeling the tendrils of harsh cold uncurl from my insides for a moment. A soft warmth replaced it for now.

The Nomicon's light pulsed softly once more, before dimming to nothing.