Chapter Three: A Tearful Kiss

Hmm... a year has passed. Well... better late than never. Much apologies.

"Um, do you want any more popcorn?"

"N-no thanks, I'm good."

"...Okay..."

Tori and Beck were sitting quietly in the back row of the auditorium. Watching what looked to be a romantic comedy/sci-fi movie that Tori really wanted to see.

Beck didn't really care for these kinds of movies.

If you could call it a movie.

To be honest, he really didn't feel like being there at all.

After that moment back at the ice cream parlor, things became pretty awkward between the two.

He overstepped his boundary and conveyed some of his feelings towards Tori.

He wasn't even sure if what he was feeling for her was real or if he was just trying to move on.

Whatever it was, it was ruining the rest of their ditch day.

Tori was trying to enjoy the movie, but she couldn't stop thinking about how she felt when Beck touched her.

If it wasn't already known that he had a crush on her, it was pretty obvious now.

Feeling that the movie wasn't what she thought it would be, Tori asked, "Do you wanna ditch this movie?"

"Why? We've only been here for over an hour."

"I know, it's just that I thought that it would be funnier than this." whispered Tori, as an usher walked past them, "I'm sorry that I even suggested it."

"Don't be." replied Beck, who was relieved to be leaving the partly empty auditorium, "We can always find something else to do."

As they left the cool movie theater, they were immediately greeted to the sweltering noon heat that was outside.

"Geez, I had no idea it would be this hot today." Beck sighed, as they made their way through the parking lot, "Almost makes me wanna go back inside the theater."

"Same here." panted Tori, while Beck unlocked the doors, "You wanna go to the park?"

"Which one?"

"The Palisades."

"Hmm, it's much better than standing out in the head." Beck replied, as he turned on the car and drove off, "Guess we're off then."

The drive to Palisades Park was a tedious forty minute drive through the midday traffic jam.

The only voices that were heard between the two of them came from the turned up radio.

Every now and then, one of them would glance at the other, desperately trying to find something to spark a conversation.

Occasionally, they would find something minor to talk about, like the heat or one of the passing motorists, but it would never last long.

Once they made it to the park, Tori was more than eager to get out of the car.

Upon seeing the breathtaking view of the Pacific Ocean, she sighed a huge breath of relief. Sitting in that car for what felt like forever had really worn her down.

Looking behind her, Tori could see Beck locking his car and walking towards her.

Once their eyes locked, she felt that same tension that was present only a few minutes ago.

From the looks of it, Beck also felt that things had become way too awkward.

Ugh, today was supposed fun and adventurous. But... *sighs* I can't even look at her without it feeling weird.

As the two walked quietly throughout the park, Tori found an empty bench with overlying trees.

Sitting down and enjoying the shade, the two continued their never ending game of avoiding eye contact. All they did was gaze at what overlooked the bluffs.

The beautiful scenery of shimmering blue water, waving palm trees, relaxing beachgoers, and distantly drifting sailboats.

It was definitely better than being stuck in a classroom all day.

But the silence between the two friends was slowly killing the relaxing mood.

I'm sick of this! Beck is my friend! If we can't be open about how we feel about each other, then how can we continue with our friendship?

Eventually, Tori had just about enough of it.

"Okay, I'm tired of this." she uttered, snapping Beck out of his fixed gaze.

"Tired of the park? But we just got here."

"No, of what's going on between us. The awkwardness. The uncomfortable silence. Everything that has happened since we left the ice cream parlor." explained Tori, taking a very deep breath, "Beck... do you like me?"

Surprised by what his friend was asking, Beck quickly replied, "Of course, you're my close friend."

"No, no. Not like that." corrected Tori, as she rubbed her hands anxiously against her knees, "What I mean is... do you have feelings for me?"

If there was ever a moment when Beck lost his calm, mellowed attitude, it was now.

He seemed quite nervous about the subject, as well as completely unprepared.

As much as he wished that things didn't get to this point, he knew that he had no choice but to come out with it.

"It's not what you think. It just happened." Beck explained, "After Jade and I... well, you know; I felt relieved, like I could actually breathe. But I couldn't help but feel terrible as well."

Sensing that her friend was about to open up, Tori tried her best to understand what he was talking about.

"When I got back home, it got much worse. I questioned myself over and over again about whether I made the right decision." Beck continued, deeply sighing as he ruffled his hair, "But believe me, the answer was not easy to get to. One minute, I felt like calling her. I had no idea what I would've said, I just felt like calling. But then, I would remember all the arguments we had, and I slowly felt myself putting down my phone. I couldn't do it. I just couldn't make that call."

Seeing Beck practically on the verge of tears, Tori went to hold his hand.

Slowly, that warm and fuzzy feeling that Beck had grown to love spread throughout his body.

The pure sensation of it was enough to help him out of his slump.

Swallowing hard and quickly wiping the tear from his eye, he continued, "I know what you're thinking. 'Didn't the good outweigh the bad?' Well, it did. It honestly did... *sighs* but there was just so much that I could take from her, that eventually it was just too much.

Ever since last night, Tori had a feeling that there was more to what her mellow friend was telling her.

She then realized that that was what made Beck so different from a guy like Andre.

Andre was more open, more prone to just spilling out his feelings. He was more willing to show his true emotions around others.

Beck... well, Beck kept things close to his heart. He wasn't exactly an emotional kind of guy. He laughed, got angry, felt sad; yet, you could never be sure of how he really felt.

You almost had to use a shovel to dig your way to his true feelings.

Lucky for Tori, she didn't have to use any excess equipment.

"Beck, um. I know I've said it a dozen times already, but-"

"Don't be. You had nothing to do with my issues with Jade." Beck assured, realizing that he hadn't explain Tori's part in all of this, "Anyway, as the night went on, I thought that I was in for a long, sleepless night... *chuckles* that was until you called me."

For the first time in quite a while, Beck actually had a smile on his face.

Tori herself, began smiling as well. Just something about Beck's infectious grin that warmed her heart.

"You make it sound like my call was really meaningful." Tori replied coyly.

"It was."

Tori's heart jumped. She had a feeling that she was about to finally get her answer.

"I won't lie, when you called me, I seriously didn't feel like talking. But as we kept going, I slowly started to feel so much better. I don't know what it was, our conversation felt so carefree and I felt completely relaxed... because of you."

Looking down, Tori felt Beck's grip tightening around her hand.

Slowly her heart began to pound like a bass drum.

She could feel her breathing quickening as she looked deep in his eyes.

Only one guy was known to make her feel this way.

Why is this happening? I-I don't actually feel something for Beck... do I?

"I don't know why, but ever since last night, I couldn't get my mind off of you." continued Beck, feeling more and more comfortable, "It sound so ridiculous, but after all this time... I think I really do have deep feelings for you."

Tensing up, Tori's mind was racing with the information that was just revealed.

It was one thing to suspect that Beck had a crush on her, but to actually hear him admit it?

The sheer thought of it was turning her world upside down, making her question whether this was a joke or not.

"I don't expect you to say that you too have a crush on me, but I at least had to get it off my chest." Beck stated, letting go of Tori's hand.

"You're right, it was best to get it out in the air." chuckled Tori nervously, feeling somewhat conflicted, "Um, I-I'm flattered. You're a great guy, an a-amazing friend..."

For some reason, Tori couldn't calm herself.

She looked as if she was trying to say something, but her lips just wouldn't move.

"What? What is it?" asked Beck, looking worried.

What happened next caught Beck completely off guard.

Tearing up, looking as if she'd just heard some depressing news, Tori quickly moved towards Beck and started kissing him.

Not that he didn't like the kiss at all, Beck found it strange how she was going about it.

Along with the tears that Tori kept shedding, Beck could just tell that something about the kiss was just off.

It felt...

Desperate...

Regretful...

As if Tori was doing it for some other reason.

Sniffling, Tori wiped away her tears as she pulled away from Beck.

"I'm sorry, I just... I don't know what came over m-"

With her eyes cleared up, Tori saw something that troubled her.

It wasn't Beck.

With a deeply concerned look on his face, he looked as if he was disappointed with her.

You shouldn't have done that, Tori.

Slowly, Tori felt herself tearing up again; she couldn't believe what she'd done.

Try as she might, she couldn't avoid his eyes.

"I-I didn't mean to. It just happened!" she tried to explain.

Something like that doesn't just happen.

"I know, I know!"

Apparently not. W-what was you expecting to happen? Was it to get back at me?

Tori's eyes opened up when she heard this. She felt herself welling up with guilt... guilt at the very thought.

"God, no! I *sighs* I'm not..."

I don't know. That doesn't sound too convincing.

"Well, it is."

*Scoffs* Look, if you're that angry at me... for wanting to just be friends... take it out on me... leave him out of it.

Those very words shook Tori down to her very spine.

She knew that what he said was right.

Even though Beck had just admitted his feelings for her, didn't mean that Tori was really feeling something for him.

She could feel that deep down... she was just trying to find some way- any way to move on from Andre.

Even after months of agreeing to just be friends with him, Tori just couldn't get over him.

But she couldn't hurt a dear friend like Beck. Not by using his feelings for her as a way of healing her broken heart.

It was just too cruel.

Wiping the tears from her eyes, Tori looked back up to see Beck looking really worried.

Everything was back to normal.

The tearful kiss had never happen.

Thank God.

"Tori? What's the matter?" he asked, placing his hand on her shoulder.

I have to be honest with him. I can't drag him into my own problems. He doesn't deserve that, especially right now.

"Beck, you're a really, great guy; and even though I like you a lot... I'm still not over Andre. Not by a long shot." Tori replied, brushing her hair from her face, "I hope that you can understand this, cause I really don't want you to get hurt."

Strangely enough, Beck actually looked quite relieved by this.

"Hmm, I can't say that I'm surprised to hear you say that." he said, with a tiny smile, "I kinda feel like an idiot now. I had just broken up with Jade, and you just told me last night that you had a thing for Andre... *sighs* It seems silly to just bring something like this out in the open."

"No, no. It's not." reassured Tori, as a group of children ran past them, "It's much better than keeping it bottled in. But let's be honest with ourselves, we're both just trying to move on."

Really thinking about what his friend had just said, Beck realized that it was true, he was trying to move on from Jade.

Did he really felt something for Tori?

Of course.

But his eagerness to move on was rushing things a little too fast.

It was way too soon for him to just move on to another girl. He realized that if whatever he felt for Tori was real, that even after giving himself some time to heal, his feelings would still be there.

But then there was another issue.

Andre...

Shaking himself of all the burdening thoughts, Beck uttered, "You're right, we're both just... broken."

"Yeah, broken." sighed Tori, looking somewhat depressed.

Hearing some school buses driving by, Tori decided to check the time, "Wow, it's 2:53. Time sure did flew by."

Even though Tori was trying to sound cheerful, Beck could still hear the pain in her voice.

"Uh, Tori, are you sure you don't want to talk about... anything?" he asked, as Tori stood up.

"No, I'm good. Much better actually." she replied, as the wind blew through her hair, "I really should be getting home. Hopefully, Trina didn't notice that I skipped school; she would just love to run and snitch to Mom and Dad."

Chuckling, Beck got up as they walked towards the parking lot, "Don't worry, I'm sure we could come up with some excuse or something."

"Thanks." smiled Tori, as they got in the car, "You know, even though our ditch day didn't exactly turn out how we would have liked it. It still wasn't that bad. You helped me get the new PearPhone XT... uh, we got to eat some really good ice cream; even though the movie was terrible, we did get to see some pretty cool movie trailers; and even after all that, we at least got to enjoy the beautiful scenery of this park."

As he cranked up his car and pulled out of the parking lot, Beck couldn't help but love the optimism that Tori was displaying.

Even after what was quite possibly the worst ditch day ever, she still saw the positive in all of it.

And with that, Beck found himself even more fascinated by her.

So it was pretty safe to say that Beck's feelings for her hadn't died down.

Not by a long shot.