Story Summary: Cam and Vala cannot agree on names so they elicit the aid of their friends.

With Friends Like These...

Taking another swig of his beer, Cam scanned the people gathered in his living room. Sam and Jack sat cooing over his week-old daughter while Daniel and Carolyn did the same with her twin brother. Teal'c stood watch over the ever-growing pack of SG-1 kids playing on the floor, a serene smile on his face. And Vala was glaring at him from her seat on the recliner. Boy, that woman could hold a grudge. Cam tried his innocent little boy smile but that only made her glare harder. He took another sip of his drink with a rueful grunt. Four kids and he still hadn't learnt his lesson, he thought with a sigh as he moved back into the living room.

"I still say Lisa and Bart are great names." Jack argued once more and Cam could only roll his eyes. Jack had been fighting for those names since Vala found out he was pregnant the first time.

"Daddy, that's silly." Jack and Sam's daughter, Ally said from the floor. The rest of the children nodded in agreement.

"I am not naming my children after some cartoon characters." Vala said angrily, turning her glare from Cam to Jack.

"I didn't think they were that bad.' Jack mumbled before going back to playing with the infant in his arms.

"What about something historical like Hera and Zeus." Daniel put in.

Silence filled the room as Vala's glare once again changed direction and Carolyn slapped her husband's arm.

"Ow! It was just a suggestion." The archaeologist mumbled, ducking his head.

"It was a bad suggestion." Vala told him. "This is ridiculous. We're all reasonably intelligent people, although I am beginning to have my doubts about that. The point is, we've all named children before, it shouldn't be this difficult."

"Yeah, but Danny and Caro cheated." Jack put in petulantly. "They named Kim and Claire after their grandmothers. Their names are pre-owned."

"There's nothing wrong with that, but we've already used my mother's name for Sara's middle one and I refuse to name my son after Jacek."

Suddenly, everyone started tossing out names and Cam had a hard time keeping up with all of them. He did hear Teal'c mention Bra'tac and Jack was still arguing for Bart and Lisa. After a while, Cam got fed up and caught Vala's eye, silently telling her to follow him to the kitchen. She nodded and stood, none of their friends acknowledging their departure. Cam pulled his wife into a light embrace and kissed her temple, smiling when she rested her head on his shoulder.

"I'm beginning to think asking our friends for advice was a bad idea." Vala commented sadly.

"No kidding," he responded with a chuckle. "We'll figure this out, baby."

"It's never taken us this long to name a child before."

"Well, there are two of them this time." he joked.

"I'm serious, Cameron. We have to agree on something." Vala told him, lifting her head to look him in the eye.

Before he could answer, they heard a yell from the living room.

"I've got it!" came Jack's excited voice. "Jack and Jill!"

A chorus of groans, Cam's included, followed the declaration.

"Yup, bad idea. I'm beginning to think your choices weren't so bad, after all."

"Really?" Vala asked hopefully.

"Yeah. I mean, they could be worse. I think we've proven that." Cam said with a pointed look at their friends.

"Those names are still available." Vala bit her lip and shrugged.

Cam studied his wife for a moment, tossing her name choices around in his head. Given what had been bandied about for the last few hours, he was willing to go with just about anything she came up with.

"You know what, let's go for it."

Vala squealed and threw her arms around his neck. "Thank you, Cameron. I love you so much."

"I love you, too, Vala." He hugged her a little tighter before pulling back. "Shall we go inform the mob?"

"Okay." Vala grinned, taking his hand and leading him back to the living room.

Everyone was still yelling and the couple tried to catch their attention but to no avail. Finally, Vala seemed to have had enough and placed her fingers in her mouth, letting fly a screeching whistle. The entire room went quiet as the group looked at them.

"Sorry to interrupt, but we've come to a decision."

"Bart and Lisa, I knew it!" Jack exclaimed.

"No, Jack." Vala rolled her eyes.

"Homer and Marge?" he questioned.

"Hell no." Cam replied. "We decided to go with Vala's first choices. Not that your ideas weren't...appreciated, but-"

"Oh, for crying out loud, Mitchell. Just tell us the kids' names."

"Vala, you wanna do the honours?

"Certainly, darling. We've decided to name them Chiana Jewel and Rygel John."

"You have got to be kidding me!" Jack and Daniel said in unison, to which their wives smacked them each on the arm in perfect synchronisation.

"I think they're lovely names." Caro defended, ignoring the rolling eyes of her husband.

"Yeah, yeah, great names." Jack mumbled then looked down at the baby he held. "Hear that, kid? You finally have a name...of sorts."

"I've got the paperwork right here, all you have to do is fill in the names." Caro told them, pulling it from her purse and laying it on the table.

Cam and Vala did as requested and took in a relieved breath when it was complete. His kids finally had names and he was out of the doghouse with his wife. Could life get any better?

"Well, now that's all taken care of, what say the ladies and I fix some dinner?" Vala said with a grin.

Caro and Sam stood as well, each wearing a grin of their own. Vala winked at them and they all started laughing as they headed for the kitchen.

"By the way, girls, I want to thank you for all your help. I couldn't have pulled this off without you."

The laughter began again and all the men's jaws dropped. All but Teal'c's, that is. He simply wore an amused expression.

"What the hell just happened?" Cam asked.

"You just got played, Daddy." Sara answered from her seat next to Ally before going back to what she'd been doing.

Cam hit his forehead with the palm of his hand. Yup, he'd been played.

The End