It's Not Your Fault

Haru scratched the back of his head. "Look, Rin, it wasn't your fault."

The cerise haired male gave a bitter laugh. "Wasn't it?"

~.~.~.~

"Aah!~ That was a good practice!~" Nagisa stretched and arched his back.

"Yep. Having joint practices with Samezuka Academy gives us competition as well." mentioned their captain, Makoto.

Rei and Haru nodded in agreement. It had been two weeks since they started having joint practices with Rin's swim club and they had gotten considerably better. They had the pool, the competitive spirit, the will to get better.

"So, should we come back here tomorrow?" asked Rei as he adjusted his red framed glasses which clashed with his dark blue hair and violet eyes.

Makoto nodded. "Same time, alright?" The other members agreed.

"Haru-chan, where are you going?~" All eyes turned to look at their best swimmer who was heading in the direction of the stairs.

"I forgot my bento. Go on without me." was all he said.

When Haru's figure disappeared form the stairs, Rei gave Makoto a puzzled look. "Will he be okay?"

The ecru haired captain just smiled. "He'll be alright. Let's go!"

~.~.~.~

Haru marched up the old cement stairs, headed for the roof. The railing was covered with rust and he wondered why such a well-to-do school couldn't even fork up some money to paint the stair railings. He sighed as he wiped the rust off of his hands. He wasn't going to touch that again.

After what seemed like a hundred floors later, Haru saw the door to the roof. He grabbed the doorknob and turned it open. Bright orange light streamed in, causing Haru to blink a few times to let his eyes adjust to the light. Evening was here, the sun a red ball. The sky and clouds were painted with hues of pink, yellow and orange with a tint of scarlet. A gust of wind blew past him and ruffled his jet-black hair, making him pull his jumper around him tighter. It was spring, and it was cold.

Let's see, where did I put my bento? Haru let his eyes wander around the roof, trying to spot his sky blue bento which he left there during their break from practice.

He stopped. What he saw wasn't his bento, but a figure. A figure with cerise hair, clad in black jumper and sweatpants, red goggles hanging around his neck. There were the words 'Samezuka Swimteam' at the back of his jumper. The figure had his pale hand on the fence, fingers curling around the thin wire. His other hand was slumped at his side, fist tightly clenched. You didn't need a genius to find out who it was.

"Rin" called Haruka breathlessly. The boy called Rin flinched at the sound of his name. Haru found that weird. The usual Rin would be in his face right now, making snarky comments and acting all high and mighty. But he wasn't. Haru took a step closer and saw that Rin's shoulders were trembling. "Rin?" he asked, voice laced with concern. His friend wasn't like this. Haru reached out to touch Rin's shoulder. "Rin, are you o-.."

Rin spun around so fast that he almost threw Haru off balance. Haru's eyes widened at what he saw. There he was, Matsuoka Rin, the proud, snarky, bitchy Rin that they all hated, crying. Tears were streaming down his face, marring his usually cool features. "Get away from me!" he shouted as he pushed Haru's hand away.

Haru was stunned. His friend was crying like there was no tomorrow, tears and snot mixed together with that sad yet furious expression. "Rin, what's wrong?" He was met with silence as Rin turned the other way, determined not to face the jet-black haired boy.

Sensing that he wasn't going to get another response from his rival anytime soon, he did something impulsive. Grabbing Rin lightly by the hand, he pulled his former friend into a tight hug. Haru never did these things for anyone. A hug always felt so wrong to him, but he knew that it felt good to others, so why not?

Rin knew that Haru hated this kind of physical contact. He knew that Haru never liked to stick to anyone. Rin was the one taken by surprise now. Why? There were so many things running through his mind at once, he couldn't keep up. His problems, his guilt, Haru hugging him,... Rin couldn't care anymore. He threw his arms around Haru and released the floodgates.

Haru stood there hugging his friend awkwardly. He didn't like hugs. Rin was crying and crying and crying. With a hesitant hand, Haru lightly stroked Rin's back. Seeing that he had no objections, Haru hugged the cerise haired male tighter.

They remained in that position for a while.

~.~.~.~

"Want to tell me what happened?" inquired Haru.

Rin had calmed down. The tears were gone, but the streaks they left behind were still present. Rin's eyes were red and puffy, his breaths coming in bursts. His face still held that sad expression.

"It was my fault."

"What was your fault?" pressed Haru.

"He died because of me..." Rin's voice was getting softer and softer as he trailed off.

Haru scratched the back of his head. "Look, Rin, it wasn't your fault."

The cerise haired male gave a bitter laugh. "Wasn't it?"

"I'm sure that his death did not concern you." Haru certainly didn't know who he was, but he guessed that it shouldn't matter.

"You don't get it! It was my fault! All my fault! All of it was my fault!" shouted Rin as he buried his face in his hands. He was starting to cry again.

Haru stroked his back gently. He cupped Rin's face and brought it to his level. Blue orbs met red ones. "Rin," said Haru as sincerely as he could. "it. Wasn't. Your. Fault."

Rin found that hard to believe. After all, it was his fault that he... Haru's forehead met with his. Rin stared into those blue orbs that sparkled like the ocean and instantly calmed down.

Haru smiled. Even if he was socially inept, he could help his friend. He was about to say something when Rin butted in.

"I killed Umi..." His eyes were downcast.

"Huh?" Haru had a puzzled look on his face. Who was this 'Umi'?

"I-I... I went on a trip and didn't feed him for a week!" exclaimed Rin.

Haru stared at his friend blankly. "Um... Rin, who is Umi?"

Rin's face froze. "Eh?" His mouth was wide open, showing his sharp teeth. "EH?!" He pulled away from Haru. "Y-you mean you don't know who Umi is?"

Haru shook his head. No, there was no 'Umi' in his memory.

Rin slapped his face. "And here I was, telling you..." he muttered. "Umi! Hello! Our seahorse! The one that we found at the reefs of the beach when we were kids!" Rin swung his arms in the air, his sarcasm was at least back.

Suddenly, everything came flooding back to him. The summer day. The white sand of the beach. The blue of the sea. The rippling waves. The beautiful coral. The green seaweed. That yellow seahorse. Rin had taken it back that day, saying that he had an aquarium.

There was a brief silence.

Then, laughter. Haru couldn't help but laugh at his friend's grief! A seahorse? Rin was crying over a seahorse? A seahorse which they found as kids? A seahorse which Haru couldn't even remember?

Rin blushed a cherry red. "Hey! What are you laughing for?!"

Haru wiped a stray tear form his eye and continued laughing. He clenched his stomach tightly to stop the pain from spreading.

Rin scoffed. "I knew I shouldn't have told y-.. !" His lips met with Haru's in a kiss. Rin's red orbs widened with surprise. He looked into Haru's eyes, seeing no malice.

"Rin, you really are too cute."