I've been in a writing slump lately (for my multi-chapter ones, at least) so I've decided to pour all the plot bunnies in my head into one-shots so I can continue my next updates.

So much fics, so little time. For those who are interested in/following my other fics, here are the current progresses for each one. The ones with the asteris are new stories.

Changing our Future - 20%

Blue and White, Intertwined - 15%

Clockworks - 76%

The Destroyed Destroyer* (DGM) - 50%

A Bachelor's Tale* (KHR) - 30%

Fated* (KagaKuro) - 25%

Lost Chance* (No pairings) - 46%

Those Who Should Meet, Will Meet* (No pairings) - 32%

Lightless Shadow* (KiKuro) - 63%

Aquarius* (MidoKuro) - 8%

Kurokoholic* (Kuroko's fanclub) - 22%

This is the first fic I've finished among my one-shots/updates. I actually plan on writing fics for all pairings in GoM x Kuroko, along with Kagami and Ogiwara. I still haven't thought of a one-shot for MuraKuro, AoKuro, and OgiKuro. This has no pairings, but there are hints of Kuroko harem.

R & R.

Enjoy~!

Kuroko rubbed his eyes as he sat up, blurry eyes peering at his surroundings. He glanced at his alarm clock.

3:00 am.

He yawned silently.

It seems that he couldn't sleep well, feeling what Kagami experienced when he learned they were going to play against a member of the Generation of Miracles. The bluenet couldn't sleep peacefully, for the notion of playing against Rakuzan—especially Akashi—made him a bit antsy. You couldn't blame the phantom player, because that afternoon would be the championship match between Seirin and Rakuzan.

As he was thinking deeply about what would transpire later on, the door slammed open and in came a tall, burly man with unruly black hair and bright gray eyes (and that's where Kuroko got his infamous bed hair). He wore a sleeveless white shirt and baggy cargo pants. The man had a big grin on his face—

"Rise and shine, Tet-kun. It's time for breakfast!" —and he also had a very, very loud voice. Kuroko inwardly pouted at the unfairness of it all; why didn't he inherit the other's giant genes? The rest of his family were taller than him, too!

"Good morning, Dad," He greeted back, standing up and fixing his head. His father guffawed before slapping him on his back, hard.

"Let's hurry before your sisters finish everything!" And he left the room, still laughing. The bluenet trailed afterwards.

"Kotetsu, Tsuya," A petite blue-haired woman with matching eyes and a pokerface greeted them. She had a frilly apron, yellow turtleneck shirt, and a brown pleated skirt. All in all, she appeared to be a female version of Kuroko.

The laughing man, Kotetsu, sat beside her and dug in. As he chewed on an tamagoyaki, he grinned heartily and complimented his wife's cooking. "As usual, your cooking is of a goddess, Yanami!" She simply nodded at him and continued to eat.

Beside Yanami was a sweet old lady with stark white hair and gray eyes. She donned a plain black shirt and dark green skirt way past her knees.

On the other side of the table were three chairs. The first seat was occupied by a girl with long black hair and gray eyes. She had a bright grin on her face that mirrored Kotetsu's, and was wearing a white dress shirt and a skirt underneath her long purple jacket. The second seat was used by a girl who looked exactly like the previous one, but with blue eyes and glasses. Unlike the other, she only wore a black lacy bra and a pair of short shorts. Both girls had very large assets, opposed to their flat-chested mother. The last seat was unoccupied.

"Tet-nyan, sit beside me. I'll take Mina-pon's chair~!" The first girl exclaimed, trying to push her look-alike to the last seat. She was also loud and boisterous. It was like she was a female version of Kotetsu.

The other immediately protested. "No fair, Mitsu. I want to sit beside Tet-chan, too." She was calm, but her voice held a deadly tone.

"Haha! Our twins are as lively as ever, neh, Yanami?"

"Kids these days sure have a lot of energy," The old woman exclaimed.

Kuroko still had a deadpanned expression. "Mitsu-nee, stop pushing Mina-nee. Mina-nee, please put a shirt on."

"Mou, but I wanna sit with you rather than Mina-wanwan!" The gray-eyed girl shouted.

"Meh, it's too hot. Besides, I just want everyone to know I'm prettier than Mitsu-baabaa," The blue-eyed girl replied.

The pair glared daggers at each other. Everyone on the table sighed, with the exception of their father, who simply guffawed and continued to spill food from his mouth as he talked.

"Mitsuko, Minako, keep quiet and eat. Tetsuya, just sit down. Kotetsu, don't talk with your mouth full." Their father gulped at the sight of his wife's darkening eyes. An angry Yanami was a scary Yanami. The twins pouted at their ever stoic mother—since she only called her kids by their full names when irritated or pissed off—and silently agreed that their youngest would sit between them. When Kuroko sat down, his older sisters' arms instantly linked with his.

Mitsuko was the first to move. "Say 'ahh', Tet-nyan!" She held her chopsticks towards the bluenet's mouth. Minako yanked the only son out of her grasp. "I get to feed Tet-chan!"

"No, me!"

"Mitsuko, Minako…"

"Sorry, Mom," The twins chorused. They continued to eat their tamagoyaki, hotdogs, and bacon. Eventually, all six of them grabbed a carton of milk from the fridge. However, the milk only did wonders for the others except Kuroko. He was the shortest out of them.

And so was the typical Kuroko family morning.

Believe me, it's worse during lunch and dinner.

"Oi, Mitsu-chan, Mina-chan! Better look out for Tet-kun, alright?!" Their father yelled, a few inches away from them.

"I won't let any semes deflower my uke brother and—" She continued to talk about all the things that perverts can do to Kuroko. The bluenet paled slightly, but still kept a straight face on.

"None of the wolves would get him because I'm the one who'll they have sex with—" Minako was no better.

"Bye, Dad," Kuroko interrupted before pulling his sisters away. If he let them prattle on, they would be late for school.

Mitsuko bounced happily out of the house, clutching her book bag and ready to go to college. Minako, who was also headed towards the same destination, thankfully had a blouse on and a pair of fitted black slacks; but the first three buttons of her blouse was open, her cleavage exposed.

"And then Rivaille-heichou, smiled. He smiled! I actually felt that was his rape face on, ready to take Eren and screw him on the bed!"

The first twin continued to babble about anime and her favorite pairings, especially on how 'Haru wanted to jack-off in the water with his swimming bitches' and something along the lines of 'hot, passionate man-sex'. Kuroko, of course, was used to his sister's hobby-slash-interest: Yaoi. He had long been traumatized by it so he was sort of immune to it by now. That didn't mean he was okay with finding her secret stash of BL manga all around the house when he was cleaning, though.

"You shouldn't talk about that in the open. Everyone's staring at us." True, the bystanders were gawking incredulously at the die-hard fujoshi and her siblings.

"It's okay. Yaoi is my passion! Yaoi is the food of my soul!" She declared with a glowing face. "Yaoi shall rule the world!" And the crowd felt awkward with the girl shouting out her dirty hobbies. Honestly, it was hard to take in that she was the eldest child, only a couple of minutes older than her twin.

Meanwhile, the younger twin lazily listened to the other's stories and sighed. "Mitsu certainly is livelier than usual." She turned to their youngest. "Tet-chan, better introduce us to your team someday. I want to know if there are good-looking guys I can flirt with."

"Nee-san, you shouldn't play around with my teammates."

"But boys my age are no fun anymore," She whined.

"Neh, Mina-pon. I want to write an M-rated MakoHaru story, but I wanna make a Haru x mackerel one, too!" Mitsuko grabbed her twin's shoulders and shook her profusely. "What do I do?!"

"Why not do both?" Minako drawled. "Haru can eat mackerel on Makoto's body."

"What about Gou? Water? And Nagisa, Rin, and Rei?"

"Gou can be the matchmaker. Makoto and Haru can do it while they're on the pool. The other three can watch them and—" All the other things she said were too much for a T-rated fanfic.

Mitsuko had sparkles in her eyes. "You're a genius, Mina-pon!"

"Heh, you know me."

Kuroko silently stood in the background, wondering why his sisters were like this. They may have different interests, since Mitsuko was a fujoshi and Minako was too liberated for her own good, but when it comes to M-rated stuff, they get along.

He sighed and used his misdirection to get to Seirin. God knows how broken he'll be once he hears more of his sisters' endeavors.

And he definitely didn't want to know on how 'badass ukes can get it on'.

Seirin won against Rakuzan in the championship.

"It seems that I was wrong and you were right," Akashi started. "Congratulations, Tetsuya."

Kuroko nodded at him. The redhead's smirk was gentler and less malicious than usual. "But remember, this doesn't mean Seirin will have the throne for good. We will reclaim it next year."

"I will look forward to it, Akashi-kun."

The other players of Seirin and Rakuzan smiled.

Nebuya sneered fakely at their opponents. "Here that, Seirin? We'll crush you next time!"

Hyuuga grinned good-naturedly at him. "Heh, let's just see you try!"

Kuroko looked around and his eyes became downcast, disappointed that none of his family were around to see their team's win. 'They're not here again this year, huh.'

Since his parents were always out on work while his sisters were in Tokyo Uni, they never made it to any of his matches. Back in Teiko, his parents were on constant business trips and the twins were busy with high school. Sanae, their grandmother and Kotetsu's mother, was watching the flower shop as usual.

He watched in envy as everyone else's family were here to attend: Riko's dad; Kagami and Himuro's teacher Alex; Mitobe, Koganei, Izuki, and Hyuuga's families; Kiyoshi's grandparents; hell, even Tsuchida's girlfriend was here!

Kagami noticed his shadow's distress. "Oi, something up, Kuroko?" His sudden outburst caught the other people's attention. The rest of Seirin along with the teams that came to watch the match became quiet; everyone's focus was on the phantom player.

"It's nothing, Kagami-kun."

"Ehh, Kurokocchi has a problem?" The blond Ace of Kaijo interrupted. He faced his former instructor and glomped him. "You can tell us!"

"But Kise-kun, I—"

"Ah, Kise!" Kagami yelled in surprise. Where did the blond model come from?

Touou's Ace was also there. "Tetsu, stop resisting and say it." He casually slung an arm around the bluenet's petite frame.

"You too, Ahomine?!"

"Zip it, Bakagami!"

"It's really nothing, Aomine-kun."

A pink blur tackled his side and clung to his arm before crushing his face in her chest. "Tetsu-kun, you can trust us."

"Kuroko, it's not okay… not that I'm worried or anything."

"Shin-chan's such a tsundere!"

"Shut up, Takao."

"Kuro-chin shouldn't bottle everything up." The giant ducked a bit to share some of his vanilla-flavored snacks.

"Ah, Murasakibara-kun."

"Even Momoi, Midorima and Murasakibara, huh. Are the Generation of Miracles a bunch of mushrooms?" The tall red-haired player asked his upperclassman. Kiyoshi scratched the back of his head. "I have no idea." A pair of scissors swooshed past them and the pair froze in their spots.

"Tetsuya, don't be stubborn. You're also emitting vibes." It was true. A depressed aura emanated from the bluenet despite his pokerface. The Miracles continued to gang up on the emotionless teal-haired male. He still won't budge.

"Fine." They instantly backed away from the phantom player. "It's because my—"

"Tet-nyan!"

A black blur went through and tackled the shorter teen to the ground. Kuroko found himself being suffocated by a soft chest. The person on top of him kept talking gibberish. Meanwhile, everyone else stared dumbfoundedly as a girl crushed the other. They also noticed the female's assets.

"I can't breathe. Please get off."

"Oh, whoopsie!" The girl scrambled away and pulled him up, only to hug him tightly and rub her cheeks on his. "I'm sorry that we're late. The gym was jampacked so we couldn't find seats!"

"It's fine. And 'we'?"

Mitsuko nodded and she yelled. "Mina-pon, I found Tet-nyan!"

Another black blur came and took Kuroko out of the older twin's grasp. She spun him around while her exposed cleavage rubbed on his head. "Tet-chan, your play was wonderful!" The ravenette stopped hugging him and grabbed his jersey's neckline. "You deserve a reward."

Minako kissed him square on the lips.

Everyone went jaw-slacked. Momoi screeched in horror as she watched her crush lose his first kiss to another woman. Aomine was dumbfounded at the sight of a woman with Horikita Mai's body. He couldn't decide if he should be envy of the woman for being so close with his former partner or of Kuroko who was so intimate with a well-endowed female.

Maybe both.

The rest cried at the unfairness of it all. Why were all the pretty and sexy girls drawn to the unnoticeable player? First it was Momoi, now these two, as well?!

When she released him, all hell broke loose.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Kuroko, is she your… girlfriend?"

"He has two girlfriends, Kagami!"

"Kurokocchi's innocence is tainted, waaaahhhh!"

"Noooo, Tetsu-kun's first kiss… gone!"

"She's so my type."

"Uhh…"

"Shin-chan, are you okay?"

"Ah, Kuro-chin. What should we do, Aka-chin?"

Akashi handled the situation. He took a step forward. "Tetsuya, explain."

The bluenet removed himself from his sisters' monster grips and stared at the twins. "You two, please don't do those things. They are misunderstanding the situation."

Mitsuko was the first to react. "Whhhhyyyyy? We promised Dad that we'll protect you from the vile hands of the semes." She eyed the other players. "And I see that you also have taste, I approve!"

"Heh, I expected a lot more from high schoolers." Minako's eyes landed on Kasamatsu and Kagami. "But they don't disappoint in the build department, at least."

"Wait," Riko flailed her arms. "Kuroko, who are these girls?"

"They're my sisters."

Silence.

1…

2…

3…

"EHHH?!"

"So you're saying that you were waiting for them?"

Kuroko nodded. Riko sighed, feeling an upcoming headache.

"You were also looking for your family in the crowd?"

He nodded again.

"But why did they do those things? We actually thought you were dating or something."

"Mitsu-nee and Mina-nee are normally overprotective and possessive. They do not approve of me dating anyone."

Kagami snorted. Wasn't that supposed to be the other way around? And the other girl reminded him a lot of Alex, especially when she's prancing around their house naked.

"So what are your names?" The brunette coach turned to the twins.

The older twin placed her hands on her hips and grinned brightly. "Resident fujoshi, Kuroko Mitsuko!"

"The name's Kuroko Minako." The blue-eyed girl winked at the boys whose face flushed immediately. She rolled her eyes boredly. "Too easy."

Mitsuko latched herself onto Kuroko again. "Mou, Tet-nyan. Why didn't you tell me you had good-looking teammates earlier?" She had crocodile tears streaming down her face as the boys felt their faces heat up at her comment. "Then I would've been able to draw a doujinshi of you and them just like what I did during your Teiko days with those Miracle guys!"

Her cries became louder. "I'm soooo proud of my little brother gaining a harem! Look, Mina-pon, all of them— Tet-nyan's bitches!"

Their faces were still red, but now in embarrassment.

"WHO'RE TET-KUN'S BITCHES?!"

The trio gulped, but Kuroko still kept a straight face. A man with an intimidating demeanor towered above them. Heck, he was about as tall as Murasakibara!

His black hair shadowed his gray eyes as his arms were flanked by two women: one was Yanami, Kuroko's mom, and the other was Sanae. "Tell me, Mitsu-chan, Mina-chan. Who, pray tell, are the wolves that are trying to get my cute little son?" His voice was loud, but dangerous.

"Err…" She sweatdropped. Mitsuko has no idea what to answer. Minako was glued to her spot. The rest didn't say anything in fear of receiving the man's wrath.

"Ah, Dad. It's just a misunderstanding," The short teen calmly answered. They all wondered on how his dad could be so tall, and how he could be so small. Kuroko turned to them. "Right, everyone?"

They nodded profusely.

Out of the blue, sparkles and flowers appeared in the background as his father's frown turned into a huge grin. "Well, that's good to hear! I'm Kuroko Kotetsu. This is my wife, Yanami," He gestured towards the bluenette on his right. He pointed towards the old lady. "And this is my mom, Kuroko Sanae. Gyahahaha!" He laughed boisterously. They sweatdropped.

Kuroko bowed towards the other women. "It's nice that you can come, Mom, Sanae-baa-chan."

The sweet old lady simply chuckled and patted his head (even she was taller than him by a few inches). His mom kept a pokerface on. "Of course, Tsuya. This is your biggest match yet. We wouldn't want to miss it."

With Kuroko and Yanami standing beside each other, there's no doubt that the only thing that the bluenet inherited from his father was his gender. Mitsuko got everything from their dad and Minako had gotten a mix between the two.

"Ooh, ooh, Tet-nyan!" Mitsuko skipped around them. "I've finished reading the latest chapter of Crimson Spell and they were sooo hot! The seme licked him on his—" She continued her story about an M-rated BL manga.

Minako pitched in. "That's so overrated. He should've sucked on his—"

Kotetsu had slung an arm on Aomine and Kagami. "You guys are Power Forwards, right? When I was your age, I—" They had a lovely, manly talk. Akashi was constantly trying to impress him, and hopefully ask for Kuroko's hand in marriage (or dating, at the very least).

Sanae swapped recipes with Riko. "You should add milk to that concoction of yours, deary. Milk does the body good. Milk makes you taller. Milk makes your bones stronger."

"I see, I see. Then that means I should add lemons and more vitamins, too." The Seirin team feared for the next dish-slash-drink that the brunette would make for them. They can already picture the moment they puke and (possibly) die of food poisoning.

…And now they also knew where Kuroko's vanilla milkshake frenzy came from.

The other Miracles tried to placate a depressed Momoi who was still out of it because of the kiss. She was kneeling on the ground. "Tetsu-kun's precious first kiss… his first kiss…"

Takao was sulking, too.

"Shin-chan's ignoring meeeeee…"

The rest were sadly forgotten.

"So what now?" Kaijo's captain queried.

Himuro answered. "I have no idea, Kasamatsu-san."

And that's a wrap!

This is the complete list of the Kuroko family (I made it up, obviously):

Kuroko Kotetsu, age 43 (Father, Black hair/Gray eyes).

Kuroko Yanami, age 42 (Mother, Blue hair/Blue eyes).

Kuroko Sanae, age 68 (Kotetsu's mother, White hair/Gray eyes).

Kuroko Mitsuko, age 19 (Eldest, Black hair/Gray eyes).

Kuroko Minako, age 19 (Middle child, Black hair/Blue eyes).

Kuroko Tetsuya, age 16 (Youngest, Blue hair/Blue eyes).

Did you enjoy it? I had a field day with Mitsuko's fangirl personality. Well, I better go now, I still have other stories to write. :3

Ciao ciao~! -Flonne.