Hi everyone! Another killer plot bunny just popped out of nowhere, grabbed me by the throat and would not let me go until I wrote this. I really think I cannot write anything dark without popping out like two or three cute fics in between. Hope you enjoy the results.

Roronoa Zoro was bored out of his skull.

The Thousand Sunny's crow's nest was never a terribly exciting place but on that particular morning minutes were turning into hours as he gazed at the endless blue ocean in front of him, almost wishing a giant monster would suddenly rise out of the water just to give him something to do. The bright sun of an early June glistened on the waves making him squint every once in a while and the only sounds that reached his ears were the occasional splash of flying fish following the ship and Chopper and Usopp's voices on the deck. They had stopped at a little town to restock and had managed to arrive right before a local festival which their captain had declared absolutely unmissable. After spending five days eating taiyaki, walking around colorful stalls and generally lazing about the marksman and the doctor had managed to gather quite an impressive amount of little bottles, strange powders and dried plants and were now excitedly trying to figure out which ones could be used for healing purposes and which ones could do the exact opposite. They had been at it for two days, ever since they had set sail and Zoro had taken to watching them from the crow's nest smirking at the occasional flash of light and smell of burnt hair.

His right foot bumped into something.

A frown spread over his face as he bent down to pick up a large bottle made out of green glass. A round cork sitting deep inside its neck was nearly invisible under a thick layer of shiny red wax and as Zoro's fingers closed around it, he could feel that the glass itself had been given a coat of transparent resin to prevent it from cracking. He held it closer to his eyes and gave it an experimental shake. It felt very light and if not for the slight rustle that came from inside the bottle when he shook it harder, he would have been convinced it was empty.

He bent over the handrail and called out to their marksman who was now desperately trying to put out a small fire on the reindeer doctor's hat.

"Oi, Usopp! Is this thing yours?"

The marksman gave a last swat at the air around Chopper's antlers and turned his head up.

"Huh, is that a wine bottle? Don't tell me you managed to score something decent at that festival?"

Zoro's frown turned into a large grin at Usopp's hopeful expression.

"Keep dreaming! I just found it lying around up here. Besides, it's almost empty anyway. Catch!"

The bottle dropped from his hand as he turned around and started climbing down to the deck. Usopp's eyes widened in panic as he ran forward trying to grab it only for the captain to snatch it from the air when it was about to land in his hands.

Luffy stared at the bottle in silent puzzlement.

"Hey, it really is empty! Someone must have drunk all the wine and just thrown it out."

"No way, it's all sealed up." Zoro knocked on the green glass. "It's got a protective coat and everything. There's definitely something in there, something like paper or cloth."

Luffy squinted as he stared harder at the glass trying to make out the blurry shape inside it.

"A message in a bottle? I thought people threw those into the sea!"

"Let me see that."

Nami rose up from her chair and walked towards them. She took the bottle from Luffy's hands and turned it upside down revealing a round piece of glossy paper stuck to the bottom. A faint orange seal depicting a strangely anthropomorphic cross-eyed seagull had already begun to wash off but the general outline could still be recognized.

"See this?" The navigator turned to Zoro and pointed at the seal. "This is the logo of the Happy Seagull delivery service."

"What?" Usopp took the bottle from Nami´s hands and cringed at the crude drawing.

"They deliver letters and packages for free." Nami explained as she caught Luffy's confused expression. "The catch is that they use seagulls for their deliveries and these birds aren't exactly the smartest. Once you send something, there's a very big chance it will never actually reach its destination."

Usopp let out an exasperated sigh.

"I guess you get what you pay for."

"Well, they usually operate in small communities so eventually someone will find the message anyway." Nami shook her head and snatched the bottle from Usopp's hands again. "The point is, someone mailed this. Probably to us."

"Who would mail an empty bottle?"

"I don't know." Nami's expression turned dark as she put the bottle on the deck and stared at it deep in thought. "I don't like this one bit. Happy Seagull's deliveries are all anonymous so people have used them for some really nasty stuff in the past. That's why only small communities will work with them now. We'll have to be extra careful, it could be a bomb for all we know."

Nami paused as she stared at the bottle again. Behind her, Usopp and Chopper exchanged glances and started slowly backing away from it. Zoro was about to snicker at the unabashed terror on their faces but instead his mouth fell open in shock as Luffy's foot descended upon the bottle crushing it like a grape. The wide grin upon the captain's face was quickly replaced with disappointment as he stared down at the broken glass and then with a grimace of pain as Nami´s fist connected with his head.

"You moron! Did you hear a word of what I said?! You could have killed us all!"

Luffy picked himself up from the floor with a large pout on his face.

"But I didn't! See?" He crawled towards the broken bottle on the deck and swiped the glass shards away from a large rolled-up piece of paper. "It's completely safe. It's probably just a letter or something."

"I don't know, it looks too big to be a letter." Usopp piped up from behind Luffy. "With our luck, it's probably a death threat."

"You really are negative aren't you?" Zoro rolled his eyes and bent over the paper as it slowly unfurled itself in the wind. "Luffy's right, this thing is harmless. It looks like…"

He felt his own voice trailing off as he gaped at the paper on the deck.

"What?" Nami´s voice trembled as she peeked at the contents of the bottle from behind his shoulder. "Is it bad? Is it..? Oh…

In the deafening silence that ensued Zoro was finally able to find his voice again.

"Hey, love cook! Get your ass up here!"

Usopp was convinced they were being followed.

He had initially attributed it to paranoia but as he took a glance at the crowd teeming around the small ice cream parlor the suspicion crept back. He craned his neck trying to get a better glimpse of the people sitting around the tables on the square. The ear-splitting karaoke that had been the day's main event had just finished and everyone was in a hurry to get to the food stalls to replenish their strength or rather, to drink the memories away. The crew, who had decided to skip the event altogether, gathered at the first stall that opened and were now chatting among themselves about their next destination. As everyone around him burst out laughing, Usopp sighed and was about to give up on his search when his eyes settled on a table across the street.

The girl sitting there could be no older than ten. The strawberry sundae she had ordered was quickly becoming sticky pink goo and dripping down under the unforgiving summer heat. Her light blue hair was partially covered by a wide-brimmed green hat under which equally green eyes studied a large piece of paper spread in front of her. She bent over it, squinted slightly, then raised her head and squinted again. A small frown appeared on her face as she picked up a large pencil and gnawed at its end before bringing it down and quickly adding something. The cherry on her half-melted dessert quivered a bit then slowly slid onto the table.

"Hello?"

A hand waved in front of his eyes. Startled, he shook his head and turned around to find Sanji staring at him with an annoyed expression.

"Did you hear a word I said?"

Usopp gave him an apologetic look.

"Sorry." His voice fell into a whisper as he slid closer to the cook. "Never mind that, I think somebody's spying on us."

Sanji rolled his eyes.

"You're still going on about that? You really are paranoid, you know?"

"I'm serious! Do you see that kid on the other side?" Usopp tossed his head slightly towards the girl in the green hat. "I swear I have seen her watching us during the opening ceremony. And at that temple Robin took us to. And at the tavern later."

Sanji leaned back on his chair. The girl was gnawing her pencil absentmindedly again. Finally, she clicked her tongue, frowned in disappointment and looked up in their direction. Her green eyes found the cook's blue ones, widened to almost twice their size and then rushed to inspect the ants crawling slowly but surely up the leg of her table towards the fallen cherry.

Sanji leaned back and looked at him perplexed.

"Her? Sure, I remember her. I think she was sitting next to me at the play yesterday." He shrugged and took a bite out of the coal black ice cream in his hand. "What's the problem? It's a very small town, plus there's a festival going on. You're bound to see every face at least twice."

Usopp paused carefully inspecting the girl's movements. She was still staring at the floor, twirling the pencil between her fingers like a tiny majorette baton. Her tanned face had gone slightly pink.

"Twice is understandable but this is beginning to get suspicious. Do you think she might be on to something?"

Sanji chuckled.

"On to what, that we're pirates? The whole town knows already! They know we're not going to raid them or poison their water or whatever other pirates normally do." The cook's gaze traveled affectionately towards Luffy who was now in the process of stuffing two ice cream cones into his mouth at the same time. "She's just a little girl having fun. What are you so worried about?"

His carefree voice only rattled the marksman's nerves even more.

"Come on, Sanji, you couldn't have forgotten Whiskey Peak that fast!" Usopp put an arm around his shoulder drawing him even closer. "For all we know, she's the daughter of a merciless bounty hunter who's passing on information to her daddy."

He saw the cook close his eyes and hang his head in quiet resignation. A mess of blond hair fell in front of his face, hiding Sanji's eyes from him and leaving only a wide smirk visible.

"I think you're overreacting. Besides, we've been here for what, three days now? If there was indeed a bounty hunter on our tracks, I think he would have taken his chance by now."

"Not if he wants to confuse us." Usopp snuck another peek at the girl whose pencil was now flying over the paper. "Look, she's taking notes! She's going to doom us all!"

"Sure, she looks terrifying." The cook sighed as he leaned away from him and swiped a paper napkin from the table. "Call me when she starts sprouting horns and wings."

On the other side of the street, the girl in the hat grinned triumphantly and laid the pencil down.

"Hey Sanji, you gotta see this!"

Luffy's excited voice boomed through the ship and was followed by a quick patter of feet. Sanji opened the kitchen door and was just about to walk up the steps leading to the deck when the captain collided with him like a hurricane.

"Oh, there you are! Take a look!"

Before he could protest, Luffy had already grabbed his hand and dragged him outside into the morning light. He squinted trying to readjust to the sudden brightness and frowned a bit as he saw the swordsman and the navigator staring at him in mute bewilderment. Behind them Usopp and Chopper were kneeling on the floor in front of a large smashed green bottle. As he stumbled onto the deck, pulled forward by the grinning captain, they raised their heads as if on cue and gave him a look that almost resembled jealousy.

"What?" He looked around not entirely sure how to react to the unexpected reception. "What's wrong? Why are you guys looking at me like that?"

Nami's pursed lips spread in amusement as she looked at the large sheet in Luffy's hands. The captain grinned even more, turned around and thrust the paper in Sanji's face.

"Looks pretty neat, huh? Much better than the first one!"

Confused beyond comprehension, Sanji took the slightly crumpled paper from his hands and smoothed it out against the mast. He found himself staring at a picture.

No, not a picture. A drawing.

His own face looked back at him from the rough greyish paper that had the texture of a very thin canvas. The words WANTED, DEAD OR ALIVE and the number seventy seven million were carefully etched at the top and bottom of the sheet in rich black ink as if they had been traced from an actual poster the marines carried around. The center, however, was occupied by a large drawing in light blue ink and pastel crayon that glistened a bit in the bright morning sun. It showed him looking at something beyond the shot with his head turned slightly upwards and a wide smile on his face. A tiny fragment of blue sky above him was partially dimmed by a cloud of grey smoke floating from a corner of his mouth even though the actual cigarette had stayed out of the picture.

Sanji held his breath as he gaped at the sheet of paper in complete astonishment. He had never been an art person but as far as his untrained eye could tell, the drawing was nearly flawless. His gaze traveled over the all the tiny little details like the stray hairs falling on his forehead and the reflection of the sun in the blue eyes. It must have taken days to finish it, not to mention an unholy amount of patience. Not a single line was out of place, not a thing out of proportion. He suddenly became aware of the fact that his fingers could still be covered in oil from the kitchen and fearfully examined the greyish paper for stains. Finding none, he let out a sigh of relief and turned around to face the snickering crew members behind him.

"What the…?" The words came out as a soft whisper as he slowly stepped away from the mast taking the drawing with him. "What…? How…? Why…?"

Zoro shot a teasing smirk in his direction.

"That's kind of what we wanted to know. Did you hate your wanted poster so much that you commissioned a new one or something?"

"What?! No!" Sanji felt a wave of heat spread over his face as he turned to the swordsman. His mocking tone finally managed to get him to speak in full sentences again. "I have no idea where this came from! Did any of you bring it in?"

Usopp shook his head. If his smile grew any wider, the corners of his mouth would probably meet at the back of his head.

"Zoro found it in the crow's nest. It must have been dropped there at some point when we were docked in that town." He walked towards him, took the drawing from Sanji's unresisting fingers and gave it an appraising look. "Hey, she's not half bad for being so young. She even fixed your nose."

"Huh?" Sanji glared at Usopp in confusion, quickly reverting to a monosyllabic state again. "Who..? "What are you…?"

Usopp looked up from the paper and raised his eyebrows.

"You don't remember? Little girl, humongous green hat on her head? Kinda looked like a much younger Vivi?"

Sanji continued to stare at him dumbfounded trying to gather his thoughts. A faint memory of a young pink face framed with blue curls staring at him wide-eyed from across a crowded street slowly surfaced and was quickly followed by a loud disbelieving exclamation.

"No way! You've got to be kidding! I drew stick figures at her age!"

"Well, she just seems to be really gifted." Usopp took a final glance at the drawing and returned it. "See? I told you she was following us around for a reason! Next time I hope you think twice before calling me paranoid again."

"I… I don't even…" Sanji's eyes went back to the elaborate drawing trying to get a coherent sentence out but the words seemed to reach a traffic jam in his throat. "Shit, I can't even thank her! We're way too far away now."

Zoro let out a small chuckle and went back to cleaning his swords.

"You should be grateful! At least you got yourself a secret admirer that can actually draw. Then again, it would be hard to create something worse that the ugly mug they drew on your poster."

Sanji shot him a death glare.

"Hey, show a little respect! This is actually very good!"

The swordsman just shrugged and resumed his task still chuckling a bit.

"What, you're an art critic now?"

"I don't have to be! Besides, you wouldn't recognize true art if it was staring you in the face!" Sanji stepped forward trying to get the swordsman's attention. He was very aware of a crimson shade that was slowly spreading to his ears now and silently begged for Zoro to get up and start a fight with him just to draw attention away from it.

Zoro, however, stayed where he was and carefully avoided his eyes, pretending not to notice his current predicament. Only a slight smile upon his lips betrayed how much he was enjoying the situation.

"What are you so embarrassed about, anyway? Your luck with women seems to be turning around, after all."

Sanji felt his eyes widen as he kicked the swordsman's katana out of his hands.

"Hey, watch your mouth, moss-for-brains! She was just a kid!" He snapped more defensive that he would have liked as the red shade on his cheeks grew even brighter. "She must have really slaved over this poster! Don't you have any sense of consideration for another person's hard work?"

Zoro grinned.

"I do, I'm just a bit worried. She likes you. Something is definitely very wrong with her. You might have ruined a promising art career."

"Will you two give it a rest?" Nami stepped between them and pushed Sanji away from Zoro. "Don't you realize what this means?"

Zoro laughed as he looked at the flustered cook over the navigator's shoulder.

"Yeah, that there's no accounting for taste."

Nami fumed as she turned towards the swordsman.

"No, moron! Ever since Enies Lobby we all have bounties on our heads! If people start noticing us like this, we're bound to run into trouble in the long run." She took the drawing from Sanji and ran her finger over the large number on the bottom. "She probably traced this from the real thing. For all we know, she could have run to the marines with our location."

"Exactly!" Usopp piped up. "That's what I've been saying since the beginning!"

"Come on, Nami, why would she take all that time to make something so good and then just rat us out?" Luffy's voice sounded a little muffled as he chomped down on a large pink fruit. "Wouldn't she want Sanji to keep it?"

"I guess you're right." Nami sighed and stepped away allowing Zoro and Sanji to continue glaring menacingly at each other. "What I can't understand is how she managed to recognize him at all. His poster doesn't look anything like him."

Zoro gave the poster a dismissive look.

"Neither does this one, it's way too pretty. If that's how she sees you, she really needs to get glasses."

Sanji gave him a dirty look and peered down at the drawing. A traveling history professor back at the Baratie had once explained to him that ancient rulers were really picky about their portraits so every blemish and minor imperfection tended to be left out of the final work of art. Looking at the poster again, he couldn't not help but feel that the same thing had happened there. He didn't remember the last time his hair had looked nicely combed and shiny and not like a tangled blond mess. The small diagonal cut on his cheek that was still healing also didn't make it onto the drawing and she had chosen to ignore the slight tan he had gotten during their stay. Even his eyebrows looked a bit too thin and too perfect. It was, what the professor had called, an idealized concept meant to be seen not as a reflection of reality but rather, of reality through the artist's eyes.

He looked up and the swordsman and let out a soft chuckle.

"Screw you, seaweed-head. You're just jealous they like me more than you."

This fic has been inspired by each and every result I got by typing "Sanji" into Deviantart :) Don't forget to tip your writer. I mean, don´t forget to review.