Razor's Edge

By: Archer83 and Vergil1989 the Crossover King

Summary: Two officers from very different worlds find themselves in the middle of a conflict, in a galaxy far, far away.

Disclaimer: Neither author owns anything related to Mass Effect, Star Trek or Star Wars. But we really REALLY wish we did.

Authors Notes: Archer83; Yet another insane idea that came to me and had be to forced out of my head. And because I think Kirk and Shepard being out of their element is interesting.

Vergil1989; And the fact he dragged me along for the ride helps lol. It is not a certain point of view either, but truth. D Joking aside, we hope you enjoy the story as it unfolds. Adios!

Chapter 1: Suns, Sand and Sith

Jim immediately noticed something odd when he woke up, dreading the moment when Bones would no doubt enter his room and jab him with another hypospray. Why does this bed suddenly feel so damn scratchy? Wait...is that sand on my ass? Kirk's bright blue eyes shot open to see that he was most definitely not in a hospital anymore. Oh great...Scotty beamed me into a desert...in my hospital gown. His pranks are original at least, gotta give him that.

Several dozen feet away, someone else was having a similar thought pass through her mind as she sat up on the top of a sand dune. Why do I get the feeling I'm not in my apartment anymore? Anyone else might have been more alarmed about waking up in a strange place with no memory of how they got there, but Alexandra Shepard, formerly a Commander in the Systems Alliance navy, was not just anyone. Dusting off her mostly white civilian clothes, having been out of uniform for the past few months since the end of the Reaper War, Alex rolled her right shoulder until she felt something pop as she tried to get her bearings. Ok, binary star system, definitely not something I've ever seen but nothing unusual either. Still, if this isn't a barren rock, there should be someone around here that can help me out.

Shepard was so lost in her own thoughts that she never heard the stranger sneaking up on her until he started speaking. Spinning on her heel quickly, her short raven black hair spun with her until she stopped and met the man's gaze with a scowl plastered on her face. "Let me guess. You're the entertainment, right? Never thought I'd say this, but please don't bother taking your clothes off. I'm too annoyed with this whole little prank to appreciate it right now anyway."

"Entertainment? I'm not anyone's goddamn entertainment." Alex crossed her arms under her chest, her glacial blue eyes narrowing to slits as she sized up the guy in front of her. Besides being a little bit of a prick, he's actually kind of cute. Too bad I'm probably going to have to kick his ass.

What in the world happened to her face? At least she's pretty hot, although it looks like she could kick my ass with one hand behind her back. There was no mistaking the defined muscle underneath the rather snug clothing she was wearing. She was some type of soldier or he was still in Starfleet Academy. At the moment though, it was the thin line of blood rolling down her left sleeve from a small tear that caught his attention. "Hey...you alright? I think-" Jim only just managed to stand his ground when an orange glow appeared on the woman's right arm and a similar colored blade sprang to life, the tip stopping just short of his neck. "Okay...I'll take that as a yes. Your arm's bleeding by the way."

Alex kept her eyes on the blonde man while she backed off a few steps, and only then bothered to look at her arm. "Oh hell. This was my favorite shirt too." Damn, Thane just bought this thing for me. She hadn't even noticed until then that he was telling the truth. Rolling up her sleeve, Alex saw a small bit of rock embedded in her upper arm, right below the shoulder. Only a slight grimace crossed her face as she yanked the rock out with her bare hand before tossing it casually away. The cut it had left behind, to Kirk's amazement, was already closing up right before his eyes. "What's the matter, never seen nanobots before?" Thank you Cerberus. She thought sarcastically, as the man stared at her in confusion.

"Not really...no. Two questions. What's a nanobot, and would you happen to have any clothes I could borrow?" The blonde man said as he looked down at his less than adequate attire. Shepard felt a smirk forming when she realized the man was wearing nothing but a hospital gown and a pair of socks.

"You escape from a mental health clinic or something? Also, do I look like your damn butler?" Alex asked as she looked towards the twin suns before turning back to Kirk, the scowl on her face deepening considerably. "No, I don't have any clothes because I have no idea how I got here, and as for the nanobots? That'll have to wait unless you want to fry out here while I explain them."

Kirk held up his hands and took a step back, hoping to avoid being laid out flat. "I see your point...so which way do you propose we go? It's a lotta sand in every direction far as I can see."

Alex took in their desolate surroundings and pointed to what she figured was east, going by the position of the twin suns. "How about I let you lead? I can take in the nice view that way." Jim actually felt a slight blush coming on as the woman gave him a wolfish grin.

Despite the strange situation he found himself in, Jim couldn't hold back his customary sarcasm even if his life depended on it. "I can see this is going to be a fun vacation. Just look, don't touch, that's extra."

"I won't look...much. Now get moving, you'll forgive me for not trusting a half naked guy I met in the middle of a desert. Speaking of…" Shepard let Jim get a head start before falling in step behind and to the right of him. "What's your name anyway? You know, so I can tell the local authorities to stop looking for you."

Jim threw a cocky grin over his shoulder as he tried not to show how uncomfortable his feet already were. It turned out that medical issue socks weren't the best for hiking in a desert. "Ladies first." I'm starting to seriously doubt that this is all just some elaborate joke. Kirk had the distinct impression that the woman might have killed him with that blade of hers if he had gotten any closer to her.

"Wiseass." Alex smirked despite herself and shrugged, seeing no harm in going first. Not like I have anything better to do besides stare at his ass. Surprised he didn't recognize me right away though. Harbinger didn't blast my face off that badly. "Commander Alex Shepard, retired." And a very well deserved retirement thank you very much. The sooner I get back to Thane, the better. I can't afford to lose any more time with him as it is.

"Captain James T. Kirk, but most people just call me Jim when I'm off duty. So, no need to salute or anything Commander." If he was expecting her to gawk at the famous Starfleet officer, Jim was sorely disappointed.

Shepard gave the man a short sarcastic laugh instead. "Why would I salute a guy I never even heard of?"

"Last time I checked, a captain is a superior officer to a commander in any military." She could hear the smug grin in his voice. Even with his back to her, Alex had no doubt it was plastered on his face.

"No, merely a higher ranking one. Since you aren't on your 'ship' 'Captain' and the fact I could break you in half with my bare hands has nothing to do with my dislike of you by the way. I just hate wiseass officers who think rank is the only thing they need to demand respect. But since I highly doubt you're anything but an escaped patient, let's drop it shall we?" She hated guys like Kirk, who she pegged for some spoiled brat that had bought his way to his position, provided he wasn't a patient in some mental asylum anyway. The cocky swagger was kind of hard to miss, which tuned her into his blatant overconfidence. Or maybe I'm just an old cynic?

"Hey, I'm a great guy once you get to know me. Have you ever gotten a Vulcan to grin?" Alex just gave him a blank stare as he turned back to the sandy dunes in front of him. "Didn't think so. So, how about I call you Shep?"

"How about you don't, and leave it at that. Or I could always make you sing soprano." She tapped her right arm to emphasize what she was hinting at, the omni-blade currently tucked away.

Something in her eyes told Jim this woman wasn't going to do a damn thing to hurt him, as long as he didn't give her a good enough excuse. "Whatever you say Shep." At least I have someone to talk to. If Spock was here I'd have died from boredom already. "So, where you from? Earth, Risa, Proxima colony, Betazed...please tell me your aren't from Betazed. I don't need you snooping in my head, thank you very much."

"Okay, what in the Hell are you going on about? Besides Earth, those aren't planets I've ever heard of, and I've been all over the Milky Way. But I'm sure being in your head would be one hell of a trip." Alex was hoping that her traveling companion wasn't completely nuts at this point. It'd be about her luck. I survive Mindoir, Saren and the geth, the Normandy being destroyed by the Collectors...sort of, and Harbinger and his latest pet, TIM, only to be stuck with a potentially unstable guy? Someone is having a laugh at my expense right now.

This woman sounds insane. Hopefully that isn't true, or I'm royally screwed. And definitely not in a good way. "Okay...popular worlds aren't your strong suit. So what do you know Shepard?" He realized too late that he should have phrased that better when he looked over his shoulder and saw that his traveling companion was giving him a funny look, as if she had caught onto the fact he thought she was nuts. He wasn't too far off the mark either.

"As hard as it might be for you to believe, I'm not crazy. Wait...why am I even bothering to justify myself to you?" Although I have every right to be after what I've been through. Shepard sighed and merely shook her head, having a feeling that trying to convince Jim of her sanity would be an useless exercise.

Damn...what was the first thing they taught us in hostage scenario training? Oh right, keep your captor calm. "Hey, I believe you, Alexandra right? Just gotta get out of this weird situation we got here and everything will be fine."

Alex knew exactly what Jim was trying to do and only shook her head. The soft reassuring tones, the confident voice, an earnest look here and there. She had been in a few hostage situations herself and knew the drill like the back of her hand, although she had ran up against batarian terrorists on an asteroid the first time. They had planted bombs around the mining outpost while the leader made her choose between the hostages and taking him down. The second time had entailed her own capture, again on a meteor before she activated the engines that sent it hurtling towards the Alpha Relay. Yep, he definitely thinks I'm nuts. "Always try to keep the hostage taker calm at all times, or risk bodily harm or worse should you upset them, right? And now you're looking for a way to disarm or disable me. Even if I had wanted to hurt you, which I don't, you wouldn't have a snowball's chance in Hell to do either."

Jim stopped and casually took a few steps closer to Alex as he sighed with relief. "Oh, looks like I was wrong about you after all. Sounds like you had similar training in dealing with unstable people." Another half meter and I can probably knock her out.

Alex only smirked at the obvious attempt to get closer in a vain hope to take her down if necessary. "Nice try. But you've got to do better than that. I've talked or fought my way out of just about every situation you could imagine." And a lot you probably couldn't. "The fact you're trying to get within striking distance just proves-" Kirk leapt at the woman, and landed face first in the sand as she gracefully side stepped out of his way. "...my point." She could have easily grabbed his head on his way by and slammed him into the ground, but that would have been overdoing it. Not beating up a crazy person, I'll call that my good deed for the day. Hmmm maybe just a quick holo pic, for when I get back.

Spitting sand out of his mouth, Jim turned to see Alex was holding out her left hand. Her right was covered in an odd orange holographic display, that she quickly deactivated. "Thanks, but I don't need any help. Oh crap...you just took a picture, didn't you?" Good thing Bones isn't here to see this. I'd never live it down.

Alex smirked, ignoring his question, and pointed to the man's feet. "The fact you've been trying not to grimace for the last few minutes says otherwise. Stop being so damn stubborn for two minutes." Shepard replied as she ripped off the sleeve that was torn already and tossed it to Kirk. "Here, tear that into strips and-"

"I think can I figure out the rest." Jim sarcastically replied as he wrapped his sore feet in the fabric. "Thanks though."

"Can't have you slowing me down, now can I? We won't last long in this heat, we'll have to find a cave, maybe a small shaded area." Alex scanned the horizon, looking for anything more promising than the endless dunes that surrounded them.

"Right. I'm more worried about the not having any water part myself. We have a day, two tops, before we keel over." I can't believe that I'd ever say this, but I almost preferred freezing my ass off to this heat. At least I had somewhat decent company in Old Spock...ow. Shepard had given Jim a good shove in the back to get him moving after he had paused for a moment.

"All the more reason to bitch less and walk more." Alex didn't bother waiting any longer as she started moving on without him. If he wanted to stand around all day she'd leave him behind. They had a long march in front of them and had no idea how soon before they'd find anything resembling civilization. That was assuming they found anything at all.

Five hours later...

"It figures that we must have been dumped here in the morning. I think I can feel my face cooking." Jim winced under the oppressive heat and bright glare of the twin suns.

"Shut up Jim, your whining isn't helping." Alex's patience was wearing thin. The heat and her companion's constant need to chat wasn't helping at all. Just give me a reason to punch you. Oh God, here comes the cocky grin again, that might be enough.

Kirk nodded in satisfaction as they climbed a particularly large sand dune. "See...told ya I'd get you to call me Jim." Alex only rolled her blue eyes as she pushed him down the other side of the dune, watching with a certain satisfaction as he rolled head over heels until he came to a stop at the base. "I

might have deserved that." He muttered to himself as he spat out sand for the second time that day.

Alex jogged down to him a few seconds later as Jim pulled himself to his feet. "Come on, I thought I saw a few small adobe houses in the distance. We might have gotten lucky today."

"Yeah, saw them when you pushed me. Why I am supposed to trust you again?" Kirk mocked as they started walking side by side once more.

Alex pretended to give that some serious thought before answering. "Huh... Maybe because I'm the only help you've got right now?"

"That is true...come on, I've got enough of a sunburn on my ass as it is." Jim had a feeling that his entire backside must be cherry red by now after several hours of direct exposure to the suns.

"That gown does tie in the back, you know that right?" The smirk on Alex's face was a welcome sight compared to the dangerous glare she had been throwing his way not so long ago.

"Now you tell me." Jim shook his head in amusement.

"Hey, I figured you were the entertainment." Alex managed to playfully leer at the man as she recalled the first time they spoke.

Jim just shook his head as an embarrassed grin split his face. "Haha. Your sense of humor sucks Shep."

Shepard just raised an eyebrow which, for whatever reason, made Jim smile. "And yours is any better Kirk?"

"All the ladies happen to love my sense of humor." Well, except Uhura, but I won't tell her that.

"Not all of them, trust me. They probably just put up with you because-" All it took was a glint of reflected light for Jim to recognize a concentrated beam of red energy coming their way. He didn't wait for a formal invitation as he tackled Alex to the ground, just in time to receive a glancing burn to his right shoulder for his trouble. It only took him a few moments to realize that the shot had melted right through his shoulder, burning through bone and muscle with startling ease.

That's going to sting later. No wait...there it is. "Oh Hell, move!" Kirk shouted even as he rolled to the right, avoiding another bolt from finding his left knee. Instead the shot hit the sand, sending up a small plume of particles into the air between his legs. Ow, sand burn, sand burn! Why do these damn gowns have such good...air flow?!

"Get behind cover! I'll deal with these bastards." The omni-blade appeared over Alex's right arm once more as she tried to get closer to the enemy while avoiding getting shot at. It was a tricky business considering there was little cover besides the sand dunes themselves between them and whoever was firing at them.

Jim yelled at the highly pissed woman as she charged towards the robed gunmen. "Are you nuts?! You can't just...huh, I guess you can." Shepard had already managed to close the distance to the nearest shooter, and a rifle with both forearms still attached fell into the sand. From what he had seen, her blade had met no resistance at all as she sliced through the masked man's limbs before burying her blade in his chest for good measure. Before he could shout a warning, Alex had already put the dead shooter's body in front of her and used him as a shield as she charged forward. Maybe she wasn't kidding after all about being able to kick my ass? Kinda makes me wish I hadn't implied she was a stripper.

Kirk wasn't completely struck dumb by Shepard's proficiency in a fight as he picked up the closest rifle, and took aim at the guy trying to sneak up behind the enraged woman. He dropped dead, less than twenty paces from her as Shepard whirled around to see the smoking corpse. Damn. He's going to gloat, I just know it. To her surprise, Jim didn't say a word as he took aim at a second shooter that had put himself behind an overturned stack of metal containers and vented his skull with a red burst of plasma the moment he popped out of cover, rifle at the ready. The raider fell back as if he had been kicked in the teeth. "Nice shootin' Tex."

"Thanks, nice choppin' with your glowy sword thing. Huh, I wonder if it's highly frowned on to kill everyone you meet in a first contact situation? Oh well. They did fire at us first." Kirk just shrugged as he tossed another rifle over to her with his good arm, which she easily caught as her omni-blade disappeared about the same time. "Can I have one of those by any chance?"

"Not a chance in hell kid. Besides, I only have the one omni-tool anyway." Shepard hadn't forgotten the fact he had saved her life more than likely, but she didn't trust him enough to start handing him whatever technology she had on her person. Still, she smirked at the offended look on Jim's face as she started walking towards the nearest adobe house.

"Kid? You're barely older than me. What are you, thirty-seven?" Shepard gave him a glare that definitely wasn't set on stun. Oh shit...I know that look. "I mean, twenty-seven."

"Thirty-one...technically." She had been dead for two years, and was only thirty-one chronologically speaking.

"Technically?" Jim just gave her an odd look. How is someone technically a certain age?

"Later, let's take care of that shoulder first, kid." Opening the metal door in front of her, Shepard had to take a step back when the noxious smell of dead and decomposing bodies hit her nose. "I guess that answers that question." She said as she slammed the door shut before she threw up. Despite everything that she had seen and experienced, the smell of fresh corpses was something she had never gotten used to, and she honestly hoped she never did.

"Dammit. We're too late...aren't we? I know that smell..." Alex only got a glimpse of the haunted look in Kirk's eyes before he turned away and kicked a broken crate over in frustration.

So do I, Kirk. So do I. Maybe he's not as much of a spoiled brat as I thought? It was clear he had had some battle experience, just by seeing the way he had handled that rifle earlier. His reaction to the corpses that had been piled up in that house had spoken of past experience with such losses. "If you or I ever let ourselves become desensitized to what obviously happened here, I'd check myself into the nearest asylum, fast. Otherwise, we wouldn't be much better than whoever or whatever those bastards were."

The look on Alex's face spoke volumes to Jim. She had seen death, a lot more than he could possibly imagine, and yet she had somehow retained her humanity despite it all. Even so, he wasn't nearly as battle hardened as she was, and it showed. "Thanks for the pep talk Shep. I'm good, really."

Alex walked over to Jim and forcefully planted his ass on one of the still intact crates. "Yeah, right. Now hold still, this will only sting for a second." More like a minute, but you don't need to know that, do you? The younger man yelped out in pain as Shepard injected his damaged shoulder with enough medi-gel to properly heal his wound. I hope that's enough anyway. Never had to deal with plasma before today. How did they get the energy levels, let alone the packet size of the 'bullet', just right to pull that off anyway?

"Just a second huh?!" Kirk growled out as Alex kept him from falling over yet again. "You and Bones both have a great bedside manner, you know that?"

"Shut up and be happy it's working." Alex grumbled even as she breathed a sigh of relief at the sight in front of her. The plasma burn, which had cauterized the wound on its way through, was closing up like any other wound she was familiar with. Not too much longer now, might as well distract him from the pain. "Who's Bones?"

"Huh? Oh, a pain in the ass, also one of my best friends. He's a hell of a doc though, even if he does like sticking me with sharp things every chance he gets." Originally getting on the Enterprise had taken him being injected several times on their way to the med bay. Not gonna be doing that again anytime soon.

"I like your friend already." Alex laughed at the glare Jim gave her as he shakily got to his feet and rubbed his now fully healed shoulder. "Reminds me of my former CMO actually, she never screws around either."

Rolling his healed shoulder experimentally, Jim nodded his approval when all he got back was a slight tingle, which was a vast improvement from minutes ago. Shepard hesitantly turned back towards the main building. "I'll see if I can get us some decent clothes. No one's going to be needing them anymore."

Kirk had seen the look on Shepard's face when she had opened the door, so he gently, but firmly, grabbed her arm and shook his head. "I got this, why don't you rest for a minute?" Alex nodded, knowing the man was just trying to help her save face by going into the home instead.

Looks like I was totally wrong about him. He's dealt with all this, and probably worse, before. Besides the main house, the rest were small storage units and an equally cluttered garage, which meant that if they wanted new clothes, then someone had to go into the house. Shepard was almost glad Kirk had volunteered as she watched him go for the door and take a deep breath before shoving his way inside. A few minutes later he stumbled back out, carrying two complete sets of clothing, a pair of boots and a large container of water. Alex didn't say a word when she saw him subtly wipe his mouth with his sleeve. Or when she distinctly smelled vomit on his breath.

She had busied herself in the meantime, grabbing the last rifle off the ground and searching the three bodies for anything useful. A quick check of the rifle revealed what had to be the power pack for the weapon. She then found the switch to drop out the blocky power pack and another to release a decent sized canister, most likely full of a type of gas, where ammo usually went in weapons back home. At least that's similar. Ammo I can handle once I figure out what it's made out of, the power pack….might be another story. Recharging the pack would require tools she didn't have, or the time to make them either.

"They were shot and piled in there like old rags. Least they didn't seem interested in the clothes, these should do for now. Got us some drinking water too. Good thing whoever else must have been with them missed this." Jim had noticed that any food and supplies that had likely been in the house were gone, leaving them short handed in that regard. Thankfully, there was a couple of what looked like hoverbikes behind the house which Jim was willing to bet had belonged to the raiders they had shot.

They quickly changed in separate, and then headed towards the odd craft. Shepard looked at them dubiously as she nudged one with her foot. "You'd have to be crazy to ride one of these things." The other bike abruptly started as Alex barely stopped herself from jumping back in surprise.

The eternally cocky grin was once again plastered on Kirk's face as he slowly started maneuvering the vehicle, and then did faster and faster loops around the area. He stopped next to the irked woman and pointed to the other bike. "Easier than it looks, hop on and I'll show you the basics."

Alex just looked at the flying death trap and then back at her grinning companion, before sighing in defeat. She climbed on the bike, and then suddenly realized she had no idea how to operate it. "Fine. Um...how did you start it?" Where's the damn holographic interface when you need one? Hell, an instruction manual would be good at this point.

"You're joking right? What rock have you been hiding under again?" The woman glared at him as she went back to looking the controls over. Something tells me anymore gloating will get my teeth knocked out. Kirk pointed towards the red button on the tiny control panel. "When in doubt, it's always the red one...usually."

"Unless it happens to be the self destruct button." Alex muttered under her breath as she pushed the button and almost jumped when the bike lifted off the ground. She was going to kill him if she ended up flying off the ass end.

"There you go, now just twist the throttle on the right handlebar." Kirk dropped his head in exasperation as Alex rocketed passed him and into the open desert. Probably should have said to do that carefully.

Shepard rapidly sped away before turning the vehicle around and slowing to a stop beside him, the smirk on her face clear as day. "I could get used to this. Whoever those freaks were, at least they had good taste in vehicles."

Jim pointed to the large animal tracks in the sand that came and went in the same general direction. "I wouldn't be so sure about that. If I was a betting man, I'd say these bikes belonged to the people here. The guys who attacked them must have come in on whatever made those tracks."

Shepard quickly realized exactly what Kirk was implying as she stared at the massive footprints. "You think the rest of them left those three behind to grab these vehicles and whatever else they could find. Maybe even ambush anyone that came to check on the neighbors." If that were the case, the raiders would have probably been out here a while since Shepard couldn't see any other signs of life from where she was sitting currently. Even so, they couldn't survive out here on their own, not without any idea of where they were and where they could get supplies at least. "So, where do we go from here? Normally, I'd say we should go after the rest of the people who did this. Heading in another direction might be a little more prudent right now though."

"Sounds like a good idea as any I got Shep." One look at Shepard's face told Kirk she hated the very idea of leaving the raiders to attack another family, but their options were pretty limited. They had little water and no food, and with no idea how far the raider camp was or how many there were, they'd likely walk into a trap before they got close. "We can report this to the local authorities once we find some form of civilization."

"Let's hope the locals care enough to actually do anything." Too many days in Council meetings came to mind as Shepard powered up her bike and left Kirk in her literal dust.

Oh, I like her... Jim thought as he chased after the other bike, his usual grin back in place.

Three and a half hours later.

"Wow...what a shit hole." Shepard had seen a lot of trash heaps in her time, but even the krogan homeworld had looked better than the town they had drove into not ten minutes ago.

"Charming, isn't it?" Kirk couldn't keep the smirk off his face as they looked down at a relatively small settlement in front of them. "Personally, I'm glad that we just managed to find a town. Beats staring at endless sand, right?"

"I guess." Shepard shrugged, not entirely convinced the small city in front of them was much better than endless sand. Then she noticed a ship ascending from what looked to be a space port. "Okay, on second thought, its the most beautiful shit hole I've ever seen."

"Wait...you aren't actually smiling are you? And here I thought you could only smirk or frown." Jim quickly sped towards the town's nearest entrance before Alex had a chance to respond.

Why does he have to be so goddamn annoying all the time? Shepard just gazed in irritation at Kirk's retreating form as she quickly sped after him. Alex caught up with the man less than a minute later and joined him in staring at the white armor clad guards eyeing them cautiously. "They friends of yours?"

"Funny, I was going to ask you the same thing Shep." The strange vehicle in front of them was waved through the checkpoint in the time they had been talking, but not before the pair noticed the old man in the front seat who gave them a subtle wink before turning his attention to the front again as they drove away. "Okay, that was weird. You saw that right?"

Alex looked tempted to hit him on the head, but thankfully must have decided against it. "No, I didn't, that's why I'm looking at their vehicle as it speeds off right now. Of course I did jackass."

Someone seriously needs to get laid. Jim put on his best shit eating grin as he casually rode over to the armed guards. "Well hi there fellas, mind if-"

"Move along, citizen." The bored sounding man told him as Alex's eyebrows shot up. She hit her throttle and followed Kirk through the gate, shocked at how utterly incompetent the security forces were around here.

"What was that?" The terse whisper in his ear only made Jim grin all the wider as Alex glared at him once again.

"My charming personality at work? We're in, I wouldn't bothering complaining if I were you." To add insult to injury, Kirk slapped Shepard on the back as they made their way forward through the crowded streets. After a few minutes, Jim stopped and parked his bike outside what could best be described as a dive bar. "This place looks promising. If you want to find ship captains, just check the nearest bar. See anything that looks familiar?"

Shepard noticed the same vehicle that had entered the city ahead of them parked a few meters away. "Now what are the chances of that?" She didn't like coincidences stacking up on top of each other, especially right then considering she was way out of her element. Just on the street alone, she had seen half a dozen species she couldn't identify, let alone understand. Not only that, but it seemed that mechanical droids were common for these people since Shepard had seen just as many robots running around in the short time they had been in the city.

"Probably here for the same reason we are, grabbing a ride off this dust bowl so we can get home. Not that I wouldn't mind spending more time with a lovely lady such as yourself, but I have people counting on me.'

Alex only just held the urge back to punch him in the face as she rounded on him before she grabbed Jim by the front of his new shirt. "And I do too Kirk, so don't make the mistake this is a vacation for me. Believe me, it isn't. I want to get home just as much as you do and back to my own people, remember that before you open your mouth again." Letting his shirt go, Alex stomped off into the bar without a look back, leaving Jim to catch up. Before she reached the door, two droids wandered out. She ignored the gold humanoid appearing one's attempt at an apology, leaving the droid to scratch its head at her behavior.

Jim was the only one to hear goldie's comment as he passed by, which was probably just as well. "Let's hope Master Luke has luck inside R2. I do find that rude woman's appearance to be rather odd." The small blue and white domed headed droid only offered a series of beeps in response.

"Hey goldenrod, watch who you're calling odd. I'll give ya rude." Jim shrugged as he passed the two confused looking machines and headed inside. Yup, my kinda place. Huh, is that a hammerhead shark sucking down a margaretta? Definitely not in Iowa anymore.

Why is there a hammerhead shark drinking what looks like a margaretta? I'm definitely not on the Citadel anymore. Alex had to shake her head before moving forward, surprised by just how many different alien lifeforms there were around the place. The band itself was composed of pale bulbous looking humanoids that didn't match any species she had ever seen. At least the tune is catchy. God I need a drink. She had already picked up on the fact that her money was likely worthless out here and made it a point to lift someone's wallet on her way to the bar. Thanks for the lessons Kasumi.

"Tsk, tsk Commander. So, you paying or am I?" Jim smirked as he held up a familiar looking bit of currency.

Alex didn't need to look behind her to sense the guy Kirk had robbed had noticed the theft as the alien started stomping over to their spot at the bar. A young blonde man apologized after he was shoved against her by the angry drunk, who pushed him aside to reach for Kirk. Nice going Jim. At least I know he hasn't had practice. Shepard didn't move a muscle as the alien started grunting and shouting in its native tongue at Jim before the alien's companion translated for him, in a manner. "Hey! Did you steal from us?!"

"Who, me?" Jim's grin faltered as he subtly looked for something to smash over the guy's head before spying a nearby beer bottle. All he had to do was get to it, but if that failed, the bar stool would make a nice substitute. "Listen, this was all just a big misunderstanding. I'll buy ya a round and we can forget this ever happened right?"

"You won't be buying anything when you're dead!" The human shouted as his alien companion went for the gun strapped to his thigh.

Well darn, I tried to be nice. Kirk grabbed the bottle he'd spied and smashed it on the alien's face, turning to deal with the human guy next.

In the time it took Kirk to smash the bottle over the alien's head, Shepard had already spun the human around and twisted his arm painfully behind his back before slamming a kicked barstool at his feet, sending him to the ground where gravity took care of the rest. The loud crack that was heard was moments ahead of the man's agonized scream, as his shoulder was yanked out of it's socket and his arm broken in several places. Shepard kept a hold of the highly abused limb as she knelt to meet the fellow's tear filled gaze. "Take your friend and leave. I won't ask twice."

Both men nodded vigorously as they scrambled to get to their feet. Alex was slightly surprised when Kirk grabbed them by the shoulders and helped them up. "I'd listen to the crazy lady, gentlemen. Have a nice day now."

"Sorry about the mess." Alex said as she tossed a few of the odd coins to the bartender. The man shrugged and accepted the coins. He had dealt with far worse than what had just occurred. Blood on the floor was a common occurrence in the bar, if it wasn't severed limbs.

"Impressive my young friends. I admire your skill at dealing with those two and yet avoiding bloodshed at the same time." An older bearded gentleman in an old brown robe nodded his approval with a twinkle in his eyes. So these are the two I felt. They could prove most helpful in the days to come.

Oh great, if it isn't creepy old dude. Kirk mused, as he nonchalantly shrugged at the man who had winked at him earlier. "I figure there's no need to kill every drunk idiot you meet."

"Violence solves little in my experience. Still, I wasn't about to let them try anything either." Alex said as she warily eyed the seemingly harmless old man. He's about as harmless as Jack, or I'm still an FNG. She hadn't missed the strange weapon on his hip that he swept under his robe the moment he saw where her gaze had wandered for a brief moment. Or the fact he went to reach for it just before they had dealt with those ugly drunks.

"Very wisely said, both of you." The man's eye flicked between them as a sly grin pulled at his mouth. "You no doubt are looking to charter a ship?"

"Ben! What are you doing? We can't trust them!" The young blonde man that had bumped into her protested, but the older fellow merely clapped his hand on his shoulder before gently pushing the kid behind him.

"It's alright Luke, I have...a very good feeling about these two. Would you be interested in splitting a charter perhaps?" The man cocked an eyebrow as Alex and Jim each tried not to show how exuberant they were at the offer, or desperate for that matter.

Alex had the odd feeling that he knew exactly how bad off they were at the moment. All they had in their possession they had either stolen or brought with them. Alex started to speak but Kirk cut her off before she could say a word. "Sounds good to me, whaddaya think Alex?"

"Sure. Why not. Jim." We don't have a choice in the matter anyway. Slim prospects were better than none, but he at least could have tried to keep their identities a secret for a little longer.

"RRRRRAAAAAHHRRRAAAA?" Jim's first instinct was to find cover as he looked at the gigantic hairy alien standing over his shoulder. Alex merely raised an eyebrow as she turned to the source of the noise, having for a moment thought a krogan was behind them that had forgotten how to speak. The way he waved his arm to a table in the back where a human was sitting suggested the furball wanted them to head that way.

"Ah, meet Chewbacca, first mate on a ship that might just suit us." Ben said as he led the way to the indicated table which was only just big enough to seat them all.

"Whoa, whoa, who's blondie and the broad? Chewie said you were lookin' for passage for two, not four." Alex took an instant dislike to the arrogant looking captain the second she laid eyes on him. The feeling was mutual as he looked her over, leered might be more accurate. She's been in a few fights too many for my liking. Maybe former Imperial officer, or another bounty hunter. Either way she's trouble.

I hate this guy already. Wait, am I pissed because he looks like an asshole, or because he's eyeing up Shep. Hmmm, both I think. As Jim came to that mildly disturbing conclusion, he tried not to grind his teeth as the man flashed a sarcastic grin at Alex.

"Two droids, myself, the boy, and our two new friends who have already proven themselves quite capable in a fight." Ben amended as he met the smuggler's gaze. "Five thousand now, and twenty thousand when we reach Alderaan."

"Twenty five huh?" The old man nodded as Han's grin turned into a full blown smile. "Alright you got yourselves a ship. We'll leave as soon as you're ready. Docking bay 94." It wasn't until he turned his attention to the door that his smirk started to fall when he saw Imperials heading into the bar. "Looks like someone took an interest in your little bit of handiwork."

Alex and Jim took one look at each other and as quietly and quickly as they could, left the table. Their fellow passengers did the same as they headed in a different direction. Alex passed two feet behind the nearest trooper on her way out and couldn't suppress the grin on her face as he didn't even glance up as she passed by. Thanks Thane, I owe you one. Moving through a crowd unseen was one of the assassin's many talents, and only one of the many he had taught her on the battlefield and in the bedroom. It might've helped that they can't seem to see a damn thing in those ridiculous helmets.

You always were a quick student siha. She could practically hear Thane's voice against her ear as she made it outside moments later. The feeling it brought with it faded too fast for her, but it still caused a ghost of a smile to form on Alex's face as she made her way to the vehicle they had seen earlier that the two droids were standing beside.

If Ben had noticed the sadness behind Alex's blue eyes, he didn't comment on it when he got her attention. "Good, I see you have avoided our Imperial friends as well. My young friend and I shall see to selling our transport, and I suggest you do the same. Our pooled funds should be quite adequate I believe."

"Great, now we just need to find a buyer." Jim didn't look forward to trying to figure out how in the world they would accomplish that feat given the strange place they were in. To their amazement, Ben simply pointed to a nearby human that had been looking at their bikes before he had started to walk further down the street. "Oh, right."

"I got this one." Alex said as she jogged down the road to catch up to the young man that had been eyeballing their hoverbikes. "I see you're interested in our rides. We happen to be planning to leave today, might be willing to make you a good offer."

"They look a bit beat up but what do ya expect on this rock?" The man said, taking an instant liking to Shepard as he held out his hand to the woman in front of him. "Nice to meet you...miss..."

"Gunn, Allison Gunn." Chock another point on to Kasumi. The alias hadn't lasted longer than the party, but no one knew about that particular incident out here. "So, shall we talk price, mister….?"

"Oh, just call me Rel. Two and a half sound reasonable?" Shepard figured the man would try to lowball her and wasn't surprised at his first offer.

"If you expect me to walk off this planet maybe. How about six, three a piece?" Shepard countered, crossing her arms under her chest as she cocked her hip a little to the side.

"Four and a half is the highest I can afford, and if I wasn't in a bit of a hurry myself, I'd haggle you down lower if I could." Rel sighed, obviously hating to spend so much for a couple of old bikes, but he apparently needed whatever transport he could find. He was probably buying them for someone else who needed them badly. He wouldn't have been after both bikes if he had just wanted the one for himself, of that Alex was certain.

"Four and it's a deal." Rel looked up in surprise at Alex's offer, having expected to have to pay out the nose. He quickly handed over the money with a grateful smile before she could change her mind. "Hey, we all need a break sometimes right? Good luck Rel."

Alex nodded her approval and was about to start back when the man spoke up one last time. "You too Ms. Gunn, may the Force be with you in these dark times."

The Force? Eh, whatever works I guess. Alex just nodded to the man as he turned to inspect his new vehicles. Jim was impressed when she showed him the full pouch of coins she had managed to get. "How are our two friends doing?"

"Considering the kid is trying to haggle with a bunch of robed glowy eyed midgets, I think we're in trouble." Luke, by all appearances, wasn't doing so well either if the slightly frustrated look on his face was anything to go by.

"Fifteen hundred! Now you're just insulting us." Another series of strange words came out of the jawa's unseen mouth and Luke grumbled a bit louder. "Fine. Eighteen hundred." Ben merely observed the exchange, and Alex couldn't shake the feeling that the old man had had the money they needed all along and had simply sent them out to learn more about their new surroundings. Luke she figured just needed the learning experience. "So how did you two do? Better than I did I hope, otherwise we're gonna be stuck here for a while."

"I believe our young friends did quite well Luke." Just as I thought she would. Ben replied and his small grin widened a little when Alex casually tossed the four thousand she had gotten over to Luke, who looked about ready to eat sand the way his jaw had dropped.

Jim leaned over to whisper in Shepard's ear. "You didn't have to give them the whole thing you know. We only need five, remember?"

Alex merely looked over to Jim and didn't bother to whisper. "And the fact that they didn't have to take us with them at all never crossed your mind did it?" She didn't care about the money, so long as it covered some small part of their generosity. That was what mattered to Alex.

"Hey, it's not like I'm not grateful. Just being practical Shep." Jim held up his hands in a placating gesture at the icy glare he had just received. Geez, woman knows how to guilt trip a guy better than Nyota.

The boy grumbled at them as he and the older man started making for bay 94. "You two done? I get the feeling that glorified pirate isn't going to stick around forever."

"Yeah we're done blondie." Kirk said even as he noticed the fact that Shepard seemed momentarily distracted. "Luke wasn't it? You never been away from home much have you?" The way Luke glared at Jim just made the Starfleet officer grin a bit wider. "I figured as much. You seriously need to work that stick out of your butt."

Ben put a hand on Luke's shoulder long before he tried to turn around and take a swing at the young man behind him. Alex meanwhile slapped the back of Jim's head for antagonizing the youngest of their group even as the droids brought up the rear, carrying on their own conversation.

"I say R2, Master Luke certainly does seem quite upset. Seeing loved ones killed will do that I'm afraid." The smaller blue and white droid let out an irritated warbling as it shocked the golden one. "Why you little...oh...I see your point R2."

Shepard stopped in her tracks and turned to face the decidedly nervous looking machine. "When did this happen, and how?" Any information was better than none at this point, but she made sure that Luke was out of earshot before pressing the droid for anything more. Loss, especially fresh loss, was not an easy subject for anyone that had suffered it.

"Earlier this morning. It was a most dreadful scene, if I do say so myself. Master Luke's parental units appeared to have been burned beyond recognition." Alex thought it might have been her imagination, but she could swear there was a slightly sorrowful tone in the droid's voice.

"Jesus Christ...the kid lost his family this morning?" How the hell is he holding together as well as he is? Kirk looked over his shoulder at their two fellow passengers who had continued on, although Ben looked over at them briefly before turning his attention to the road ahead of him. "And now I feel like a giant ass."

"Let's get moving, you can feel sorry for yourself later." Even as Jim flinched at Alex's harsh tone, he noticed the concerned looked in her glacial blue eyes as they quickly jogged to catch up with the other men.

"What was all that about? At this rate we'll be lucky if we get to the ship by sunset." Luckily, Luke had no idea what they had talked about as they rejoined the small group moments later.

Ben cocked an eyebrow as a mild frown appeared on his face. "Oh, I think our two friends here just had an...enlightening conversation." Luke just shrugged as neither of them could bring themselves to look at the young man.

It wasn't until they turned down a side street that Shepard noticed someone was following them. He was several feet back, but the back of her neck was tingling and had been since they had started on their way to the docking bay. Until now though she hadn't had confirmation they even had a tail as a black robed alien trailed after them.

"I need to check on something Kirk, I'll meet you at the ship." Jim just nodded in understanding as he casually leaned towards her.

"Going to say hello to our friend? Gotcha. Just be careful, I'll see you at the docking bay." Alex tried not to show any surprise as the man smirked at her and walked off with the others. Only Ben took note of her absence but acted as if nothing was happening.

She made as if to check a nearby market stall, patiently waiting for the robed figure to pass her. As it headed for a small alley, she quietly followed it and made sure no one was paying attention as she bull rushed the blackish skinned creature into another alley, making the spy stumble over its own feet before it fell onto its back. "Now that I got your attention." Shepard grinned as she leveled her rifle at its neck, stopping it's attempt to go for the blaster on it's hip.

"Nice try, but you aren't getting away that easily. She's really observant like that." A very familiar smirking face was aiming a rifle at the now terrified alien as well.

Alex did her best not to growl at Kirk for nearly blowing everything. "I had this handled!"

"You sure did, but a little backup never hurts." Jim nudged the alien with his foot. "You better start talking, if she's pissed at me, just imagine what she'll do to you."

"Humans, you don't know who you're up against. The Empire will find you wherever you go." While there were a few strange noises between the words, it was intelligible for the most part. Enough that they got the message anyway. "You will not get anything else out of me."

"Really?" Alex's face uplifted into a feral grin. Let me be clear, if you fail in this I will track you down and flay you alive with my mind. That same idea from Liara seemed like the perfect opportunity to put into practice here. She might have been bluffing, but Shepard didn't plan to bluff, not if the Empire was the same group that had allowed or even ordered the brutal murder of Luke's parents.

"Oh, bad choice buddy. Well, have fun Shep. Just try not to get any blood on my clothes, alright? I like these boots." Jim backed up a few feet before giving the alien a shrug. "Remember, there's no shame in screaming, I wouldn't blame you pal."

Slamming the spy into the back of the alley with a wave of her hand, Shepard's body started to glow a dark blue as she followed the sprawled out alien down the dead end street. "Why are you following us, and who did you tell? I don't have a lot of time to play around, so if you don't start talking, I will flay you alive."

No one in this universe had ever seen biotic power before, and the spy was rightfully frightened by the blue glow that surrounded the human woman. The pain was secondary to how far out of depth he was. "The Empire wants the two droids, I was told to report their location to the garrison commander! That's all I know! I swear!"

Well now we know who probably had the kid's parents killed. And all because of a couple machines? "Are you sure you know nothing else? Like why the Empire wants the droids?" Alex asked as she knelt by the alien, her right hand glowing brighter than the rest of her. "Lie to me and I'll rip your arm off at the elbow."

The spy desperately started to plead with Kirk to help him. "Please! Don't let her kill me!"

If Kirk was shocked by the sight of her abilities, he managed to keep his feelings in check as he continued his role of bad cop to Alex's worse cop. "I have to admit, even I'm a little afraid of your glowy trick Shep. Still, clock's ticking buddy."

"The droids must belong to the Rebels, it's the only reason the Empire would want them so badly! That's everything I know!" The robed spy cowered in fear as Alex got to her feet, expecting her to stomp on his neck.

"Thanks for your cooperation." Alex felt only a little guilt as she lifted the alien with a gesture before slamming him into the alley wall. The sickening crunch that followed resolved any doubt in Kirk's mind about the alien's wellbeing as the spy fell to the sand in a heap, never to rise again. She looked away from the accusing glare on Jim's face, hating what necessity had forced upon her, but there had been no other way to ensure their quiet escape.

"Dammit Shepard! Is that your idea of due process?! He didn't deserve that!" It took every ounce of Kirk's willpower to not aim his rifle at the woman.

Alex was remarkably calm as she rifled through the alien's pockets, looking for anything she could use or sell later. "No, that's my idea of making sure we survive. Haven't you noticed anything since we got here Jim? It's a smart guess that you're not from the same galaxy I am since biotics are obviously new to you, and neither of us are natives of this one. This 'Empire' ordered the deaths of Luke's parents, I'd be willing to bet every credit I have on that being true. That tells me that they wouldn't hesitate to kill us if they ever get the chance."

Kirk just growled at her as he headed for the other end of the alley. "Let's get the hell out of here." Alex didn't say another word as she followed him to the local space port.

Docking Bay 94

"Nice to see you two haven't gotten lost." Han said as he looked away from the hatch he had opened up underneath his ship to see that the last of the passengers had finally decided to show up. I almost wish she hadn't shown up. That woman has trouble written across her face. "Get on board blondie, you to Princess."

If he was hoping to get her to react in a negative fashion, Alex only smirked and walked up the ramp. "Whatever you say Captain."

Jim was only a few steps behind her as he turned to the annoyed captain. "She grows on you."

Yeah, right. This better be worth it...I got a bad feeling about all four of them. Han shook his head and hit the ramp control before heading for the cockpit. Just have to think about the credits, I'll be free and clear of Jabba in no time. Too bad that chick is such a rough customer, she's a real looker. "Chewie, let's get out of here, the sooner these people pay up the better." Han said as he took his place next to his old friend, pressing the control levers in front of him forward, and sending the ship hurtling to the stars above. Taking a note of an Imperial cruiser that was hanging around Tatooine's orbit, and that they weren't pursuing, gave Han an eerie feeling that one or more of his passengers were hotter than he realized as he made the preparations to jump to lightspeed. Too late to back down now.

Fifteen minutes later in a Mos Eisley alley….

If not for the commander's habit of employing the local bounty hunters and spies that called Mos Eisley home, they never would have known that one of their tenacious allies was dead when he failed to report in with the location of their query. When they found the body of the spy left in the alley, even the garrison commander had to take a step back at the gruesome handiwork that had been left for them to find. Nearly every bone in the alien's body had been turned to dust, and the wall he had been slammed against had an impact crater as if it had been hit by a small detonator charge.

"Send word to the Dauntless. We've lost the trail." The garrison commander was already feeling a migraine forming behind his eyes as he turned to walk back to the command center they had set up. Today was shaping up to be a very long day.

Before the leader of the city's troops could get to the end of the alley, another of his men stopped him. "Sir, priority message coming from the Dauntless, they say it's….Lord Vader."

What?! How does he know already?! If not for the helmet covering his face, everyone would have seen the fear in his eyes as he nodded for his communications officer to patch the message through to him. A small blue hologram appeared over his right arm, revealing the Dark Lord himself. "Lord Vader…."

The holographic figure impatiently crossed his arms. Even in miniature size as he was now, there was no mistaking that he was incredibly dangerous and not to be taken lightly. "What do you have to report Commander?"

"My Lord, I am afraid that the trail has apparently been lost. We found one of my local sp-" The armored man immediately reached for his throat as if he were suffocating. There was no rational explanation for it, yet it was happening as the Commander flailed and coughed until he collapsed in the dirt, his right arm extended before him.

As if nothing had happened, Darth Vader turned his attention to another in the crowd. "That is most disappointing Commander. Lieutenant, I hope you will be more successful than your predecessor. Find those droids, no excuses." Vader paused for a moment as if deep in thought. "And find out who killed the spy, I want them captured alive...Commander."

"Yes m'lord." The newly promoted Commander replied but the hologram had already disappeared. Talk about a battlefield promotion...

End Notes:

Archer83: Well there you have it, our very own sci-fi odd couple are already involved in a galactic conflict they don't even know about yet. And, to make matters worse, Shepard has managed to attract the attention of a certain Dark Lord of the Sith less than ten hours into this little adventure.

Vergil1989: Funny how that works. Even so, how their arrival will change things is still very much up for debate, but rest assured it WILL change things. What I want to know is how they got there to begin with lol. That aside, may the Force be with them all, they'll need all the luck they can get.