Sheldon Swifties XLVIII: "Game of Chairs…"
Summary: Like my Immortal Beloved bits in my Buffyverse stories, these are fragments and short bits, some longer…Just to fiddle with ideas, possibly forming longer tales later.
Disclaimer: All is Chuck's…
Lounge, CalTech Physics Department…
A grim conference, planning for a triumphant future…
For someone…And mate…
"So…" shrewd look… "We are agreed? We'll present a united front until all other candidates are…Eliminated?"
"It seems fair…But lets hear from our impartial, having no stake in the matter, third party…"
"Sounds awful…You two are plotting to seize the Physics departmental chair while Dr. Gablehauser is still very much alive and in the seat?"
"We must plan ahead…"careful look… "One day, in the distant…(heh, heh) future, dear ole Gablehauser's gonna be no more and there's sure to be intense competition for the chair."
"Yes, quite right… I mean…Would you want to see…Quel horror!…Lesley Winkle take the throne?"
Frown at mention of the name on part of the "impartial third party"…
"Or…"
"Bawwry…" chorus…
"Well, he is quite intelligent, after all…If you remember last year, regarding that fusion reactor project…" said impartial third party noted.
"That was a misconception…" hasty cut in, annoyed glare… "He's not fit to run the janitorial department, let alone Physics…"
"You tell 'em..." pat on back… "Now, are you on board or no…?" careful look to the impartial third party.
"Yes, my collaborator is right… This train for success is leaving on track nine am and you'd better be on it or not be…I mean, you better be on it…" Aside… "Was that sufficiently threatening?"
"It'll do…" return aside…
"…Or…Else…" careful nod… Aside… "Better?"
"Lil' bit…"
"Great, thanks…"
"And what happens when only two are left on the field, after the hundreds of potential candidates meet misfortune?" careful eyeing of the two plotters…
"We…Uh…Share…" "Yeah, we share…Uh…Wait, that doesn't apply to…?" anxious look…
"No, of course not…! What are you thinking?"
"Ok…Just wanted to establish the ground rules."
"Excuse me, though, please…? If you two have things so well sewed up, what do you need an engineer for…?" frown from the impartial third party.
"Lord knows…I sure don't…"
"Hey!" glare…
"We already told you…And I told you…" frown to the "I certainly don't…" speaker, who blinked in surprise… "We need a plausibly impartial witness with nothing at stake to speak for us at the crucial moment to show we're people with the common touch as well as having the world's keenest insight into Physics."
"Yeah, all of that…"
"Nice, thanks…" frown…
"And, your support will be vital in winning over the nearly mindless leminglike majority of the trustees."
"Thanks."
"Don't mention it. Just remember to mention that Sheldon Cooper and Leonard Hofstadter are the two most promising figures in the World of Physics today, work together hand in glove, and will give the University the equivalent of a Hillary and Bill twofer…If you give them the power.."
"Uh-huh…Until they start struggling for power, betraying, and corrupting…" sigh from the impartial third party. "Sounds like nothing much has changed over the centuries…"
"Yep…Still the same ole story…A bloody fight for love and glory…" pause, expectant look…
"Sorry? Were you waiting for me to do something?" stare…
"Really? You don't know the next line? 'A case of do or die…'? Anyway, the fundamentals really still apply…"
"As Machiavelli noted…"
"Yeah that perfume maker was probably a pretty ruthless guy to get to the top like he did…"
"No, Machiavelli the…Oh, never mind…" wave of hand…
"Well, in any case, you two will need more than little ole me…" the impartial third party eyed the two.
"Yeah, but you're just our first stepping stone to power…"
"Yes…Uh, power…Oooh, what a sweet taste, it has…I guess…"
"That's victory…From 'The Squire of Gothos', on classic Star Trek… 'So this is victory. It has a sweet taste.'"
"Right…I guess…But victory leads to power, right?" shrewd look.
"Yes…I suppose…" Wouldn't have thought she could make the connection…
"Well, then…The same sweet taste…"
"Fine…But with enemies like Lesley Winkle and Barry Kripke…?"
"It'll be a struggle, but with us united…And our minions behind us…" confident gleam.
"Minions?"
"Alex…Rajesh…"
"Oh, I like that…" Raj finally speaking from his seat with a frown… "Now I'm just a minion? You told me I was the wise advisor and mentor."
"A minion who needs funding but will find his section gutted and his office in the janitor's broom closet if he doesn't play along." glare…
"Fine…" grumbling tone… "If I wanted this kind of shit I could have stayed in India and been kicked around by my own people…"
Aside…"Our minion seems unrealiably rebellious…I vote we dispose of him at the earliest opportunity…"
"My thoughts exactly…" nod… "But Alex as well…"
"Alex? She's no threat to us…"
"Us, maybe not…Me, definitely…She goes…"
"Alex? What are you saying?" the impartial third party, blanching…
"You're the impartial third party, not the moral arbiter." Glare…
"Yeah, save it for the losers…" chuckle… "Alex, history…" wave of hand.
"I don't like where this is leading, guys…"
"The impartial third party don't like where we're goin'…" grin…"The impartial third party needs to learn more about the Real World, kid."
"I think I know all I need to know, thanks…" frown.
"Uh…" voice at door of lounge… "Guys? We're ready to head home. Are you ready?"
"Absolutely, honey…" Penny beamed at the speaker at the door, Leonard Hofstadter.
"Yes, we'll be right along, Leonard." Amy beside her noted calmly.
"How'd it go?" Penny asked Leonard innocently.
"Oh, great…We settled some minor points with Gablehauser about our funding. You know he actually repeated that thing he said last week about Sheldon and me being leading candidates one day to replace him...I think he was just trying to throw a bone to us but it was kinda nice." Grin.
"Yeah." Penny brightly. "But no specifics, eh?"
"Well, it was just talk…"
"Did he mention which of you were favored for the Chairmanship?" Amy cut in, impatiently.
Penny, narrow look…Amy attempting nonchalant expression.
Bernadette eyeing both…
Hmmn, I'd say the alliance of the Houses of Cooper and Hofstadter is already on shaky ground…
Excellent…She beamed inwardly, maintaining pleasant look.