Warnings: Suicide, light gore, hardcore character death.
AN: Thanks to Sam for being super awesome and letting me bounce this idea around with her. I love you, darling! (I love you too, Amber :D)
I.
Acquiring the Time Turner isn't hard, not after the mess the Ministry has been left in. Remus knows it's dangerous. He's all too aware that there's a reason time travel is strictly monitored.
But he doesn't care. He's done playing the safe bookworm. He's a Marauder, and it's time to act like one.
II.
He grabs Sirius by the wrist as the other pass, pulling him into a corridor.
"Blimey, Moony! Weren't you just behind me?"
Remus shrugs, patting his old friend's cheek fondly. "Had a rock in my shoe. Needed to fix it," he lies.
Sirius raises his brows. "And you needed me to help you with your shoe?" he asks incredulously. "You're perfectly capable of-"
"No, it's not that. Padfoot, I-" Remus trails off for effect, just buying time. They would be approaching the battle soon. Just a little longer, and he can rewrite history.
"Say what you have to say! That's my godson out there, Remus! I don't have time to chat."
"I love you."
Sirius steps back, eyes wide. At first, Remus fears the shock might have killed him in spite of his best efforts to keep him alive. Then he grins. "You wait until I'm marching off to my death to tell me what I already know?"
"You're not dying," Remus whispers. "I won't let you."
In the distance, someone screams. Then a voice shouts, "Tonks!"
Without hesitation, Sirius darts off into the sound of battle. Remus doesn't have a chance to worry about what he's done.
The walls around him begin to fade.
OoOoO
Flickers.
Tonks battling Bellatrix while Remus battles a masked opponent. Tonks screaming as the green light collides against her chest. Sirius rushing in too late and kneeling over his cousin's corpse.
And then Remus wakes.
III.
Sirius tosses and turns beside him in bed. Remus doesn't even mind as Sirius' foot crashes painfully against his shin. They're both alive, and that's all that matters.
"Sirius. Sirius, wake up."
"Tonks," Sirius whimpers, slowly opening his eyes. "She hates me."
Heart breaking, Remus pulls his lover close, stroking his sleep-messy hair. "Shh. Why would she hate you?"
"Because I should have died."
Remus tenses. He hadn't told Sirius about his secret mission. Could it all be a coincidence? Could Sirius somehow remember the very things Remus had erased? "No, Sirius. It was bad timing."
"I should have fought my cousin. But I saw you, and-"
"I was there the whole time."
"You said you loved me."
Remus swallows a painful lump his throat. His heart quickens, and he's afraid Sirius might hear it and somehow know that he's lying, that he's broken every rule, and that he's just a selfish human being. "I told you that before we left for the Ministry."
"Okay."
But Remus knows he doesn't believe him.
OoOoO
"Sirius?"
The other side of the bed is empty and cold. Remus bolts upright. "Sirius!"
He hears a soft thud and rushes towards the bathroom. Sirius is slumped against the bathtub, wrists slit and draining into a pool of blood over the once white tile floor.
"Not crazy," Sirius murmurs weakly. "Real, real, real."
Remus moves awkwardly, slipping and sliding over the blood, trying to get close. But it's too late. By the time he reaches his lover, Sirius is gone.
OoOoO
One more trip, Remus tells himself, gripping the hourglass with slick hands stained with blood. One more, for Sirius.
"This time," he whispers, fully aware that lifeless grey eyes are still watching him accusingly, silently reminding that he's failed. "This time, I'll make it right."
IV.
"I should have fought my cousin. But I-"
Remus interrupts him with a kiss, pulling Sirius as close as he can manage. "You're alive, Sirius," he whispers, closing his eyes to will away the alternatives he's seen. Falling behind the veil, bleeding out in Remus' own home. Remus can't think of that, not now that Sirius is safe. "Alive and with me. Nothing else matters. Nothing."
Maybe Sirius starts to protest. Remus isn't sure because he captures him in another silencing kiss.
OoOoO
Sirius' name is finally cleared, and they quickly fall into a pattern of an almost normal life. No hiding and hoping, no fear of discovery.
Sirius can breathe easier, and, even if he's still plagued by nightmares of Tonks, he's happier. Remus can see it in his eyes as his lover runs through the Muggle park, wind whipping his shaggy hair.
"Sirius, slow down!"
"You're not my father," Sirius calls back, glancing over his shoulder just long enough to poke his tongue out at Remus.
"Thank God for that," Remus chuckles under his breath, settling onto a park bench and closing his eyes, enjoying the warmth of the sunshine filtering over his face through the tree branches.
A screeching, metallic wail fills the air, followed by a sickening, solid thud.
Remus doesn't have to open his eyes to guess what's happened, but he does anyway.
There's already a crowd formed around the catastrophe.
"Call 999!"
"He just barreled into the street!"
"Oh, God!"
Remus pushes his way through, kneeling beside Sirius' broken body and sobbing as he cradles that familiar, once beautiful head that's balanced upon a snapped neck.
OoOoO
Remus can barely stand when he's finally forced away from Sirius' body. A kind older woman helps him back to the bench where he's left his belongings.
"I can fix it," he says.
"There, there. Can't be helped," the woman soothes.
"It can... I can..."
"It's the shock talking, dear."
Remus isn't listening. The Time Turner is already gripped between trembling fingers.
V.
"I thought we were going to the park."
"Maybe tomorrow," Remus says. "I have a few things to finish for the Order."
Sirius pouts ever so slightly, and Remus struggles to remind himself that he's protecting Sirius and shouldn't give in.
OoOoO
"I don't want you here when I transform, Sirius."
But his lover is stubborn. Sirius grabs Remus by the wrists and pulls him against his body. "You're not going through this alone again, Moony," he says firmly, kissing the corner of Remus' mouth. "You've had to do that enough lately."
Remus looks down, tears stinging his eyes, a smile spreading across his lips. "All right, then."
OoOoO
The moment Remus opens his eyes, he's overcome with a sickening dread. Slipping on blood as he tries to push himself up does not help matters.
"Padfoot?"
Remus blinks rapidly, massaging his temples. The previous night is just a blur, and he fights past flickers and swirls of color and noise, trying to make sense of things.
He turns and immediately throws up at the sight of Sirius in a pile on the floor, his stomach ribbons of flesh and organs. The blood on Remus' hands tell him everything he needs to know.
OoOoO
"He knew the risks," Molly says, pouring tea, but Remus can see the accusation in her distant eyes.
"I can fix this."
"Remus."
"One last time."
VI.
"You're not going through this alone again, Moony."
Remus silences him with a hard kiss. "It's better this way."
Sirius starts to argue, but Remus rushes off before he can give in.
OoOoO
"For fuck's sake, Moony!" Sirius snaps, eyes wild. "I'm not made of porcelain, and I'm not a child!"
"I never said you were."
"You're acting like it! I'm going to Hogwarts. I can't just sit here and wait for you to come back from the fight."
"And I can't watch you die again!" The moment the words are out, Remus claps his hand over his mouth, but it's too late.
"Again?"
"It's nothing, Sirius."
"Moony."
Remus shakes his head, swallowing dryly. "Doesn't matter. Let's go."
Sirius grabs his arm as he starts to walk away. "This isn't over. We're going to talk after the battle, and you're going to stop lying to me. Got it?"
With a shaky nod and a failed attempt at a reassuring smile, Remus kisses his cheek. "Whatever you say, Padfoot."
OoOoO
A flash of green, and Sirius falls. Bellatrix lets out a gleeful cackle.
For one moment, Remus forgets the battle. He only sees his lover on his back, grey eyes wide, his last laugh forever frozen on his lips.
Remus takes the Time Turner from his pocket. One last time. He knows he's promised himself as much countless times, but now he knows he means it.
VII.
"Sirius!"
The jet of green flies, but now Remus takes his lover's place, the Killing Curse finding his chest instead.
OoOoO
Sirius makes his way through the knot of mourners, mirroring their pained expressions.
Moony, his Moony, gone. Sirius knows it should be him and not Remus. If Remus hadn't jumped in the way...
He kneels beside his lover's body, his shoulders trembling from a sob that threatens to escape. "Moony, you stubborn bastard," he laughs. "Had to die a hero, didn't you?"
He takes Remus' hand, frowning as he realizes the fingers are curled around something protectively. Carefully as possible, Sirius pulls the fingers back, and a small hour glass falls to the floor, shattering.