Hello my lovelies! I'm starting an OC-insert story - GASP! Yes, I know, another cliché-filled type fic but this is a semi-serious attempt so bare with me please!

Summary: Suddenly, I wanted to laugh. Uchiha Itachi was asking me how I knew Uzumaki Naruto! The situation was so freaking ridiculous that I almost burst out laughing if it wasn't for the fact that I wanted to burst into tears instead. OC, Self-insert (in the sense that the OC has my knowledge of Naruto).

This fic will revolve around my OC, Itachi, Genma, Sakura, Naruto, Sasuke and also some Kiba! It will follow the manga plot after the three-year gap (basically Shippuuden). The OC is NOT based on me, at all. The character is completely made up and should have (I hope!) a grounded and realistic approach to falling into the Naruto universe.

Rating: M for swearing and violence, eventual romance

Disclaimer: I totally do not own Naruto. This is all just for fun.

- Hello = thoughts

- "Hello." = Japanese

- "Hello." = English

Chapter 1

..~**~..

..~**~..

I knew straight away something was wrong when I woke up.

My head was throbbing with pain, the sun was shining on my face, and a light breeze was ruffling my clothes.

I was outdoors and not in a bed.

I couldn't remember what I'd been doing the previous night, but the distinct pain in my head was a clear sign that alcohol had been involved.

I remembered I was on a hike with my friends. We had decided to go hiking during the spring holidays and during the first night, we had set up camp in the wilderness, grilled marshmallows over the fire and then my friend Rachel had suggested playing drinking games. Her boyfriend had pulled out several bottles of alcohol from his bag and all my friends cheered, causing everything to go downhill from there.

It wasn't really so much of a surprise. My first year at university had been spent partying and even going for a hike in the middle of nowhere Wales didn't seem to stop my friends from having a good time.

It had started as a great trip.

The landscape was beautiful, the hike was exactly the type of physical activity I had needed after studying for finals the past month and I was having a great time with my friends. However, the drinking game had run wild and the last thing I remember was chasing Rachel past the tents.

And now I was in the middle of the forest, alone, with a hangover and no tent or friends in sight.

And for some inexplicable reason, it was incredibly hot. The air was stiflingly warm and damp at the same time, not at all like the usual mild British climate, and I was sweating profusely.

Something was definitely wrong.

I took off my jumper and long-sleeved T-shirt, leaving my arms bare in a red camisole top. The weather was just too hot to bare and the vegetation looked nothing like what I had seen during our first day of hiking.

I'm not in the same place, I thought in dread as I stood up and looked around for any recognisable sign. I'm not in Wales anymore so where the hell am I? How the hell did I get here?

Images from the movie The Hangover flashed through my mind and I wondered if one of my friends had put something in my drink and was pulling a bad prank on me. If they had, then where was everyone else.

Why was I all alone?

Realising there was not much point sitting around and waiting, I decided to walk through the forest and hopefully find help. It wasn't easy making a way through the maze of thick bushes and fallen branches within the forest of large pines trees but after a few minutes of walking in no particular direction, I came across a dirt road and decided to follow it.

I didn't see anyone or hear anything for the next half hour I spent walking down the road. I was starting to freak out but mostly I felt angry at myself and cursed my stupidity over and over again, vowing never to drink again.

Ever!

Fortunately, it seemed luck was on my side when I finally spotted a couple of people up ahead sitting by the side of the road around a campfire.

Hooray for campers!

I scurried along, half running as my heart lifted at the sight of people.

Finally I was going to get out of here!

As I approached, the two figures turned out to be men and my burst of joy was short-lived when I noticed they both had a creepy air about them that didn't reassure me in the slightest. One of them turned to look my way as I approached and the lecherous smile on his face did nothing to appease my fears. His companion, who stood up to meet me had a large jagged scar running down his face and was holding a knife in one hand.

Oh my God!

My adventure was suddenly turning into the horror movie I distinctly remembered watching the week before and every instinct within me screamed to run away.

Run! Run the hell away right now, Luce, before they attack you…

But fear grasped hold of me instead. My body refused to respond and remained rooted om the spot. My state of panic must have shown on my face as the smirks on the mens' faces grew wider. The scarred man continued walking towards me twirling his knife in one hand.

Oh crap, oh crap, oh crap…

Tilting his head to one side, his eyes drank in my appearance.

My heart seized.

"Ohayou neechan," he spoke in a low voice and my eyes went wide. He mumbled something else, laughing heartily as he turned back to face his companion, who exclaimed something in return.

I stood next to the scarred man completely stunned by their words.

Is that…Japanese? They're talking in Japanese! What the hell?

The man before me stopped laughing and asked me something else but I stared blankly at him still lost in my thoughts.

Why on earth were they talking Japanese? They didn't even look Japanese! The creeper sitting down had sandy-coloured hair and the other one was tall and balky with thick, curly black hair and seemed even hairier than my media studies lecturer, which I hadn't thought possible.

For a second, my brain went on overdrive trying to think of possible solutions to my current situation.

Was I suddenly in Japan? Had I been drugged and brought over to Japan all of a sudden? Or had I hit my head so hard that my brain had switched from English to Japanese? I'd never heard of it of course, but what other reason was there for two non-Japanese men to suddenly speak in the language I was studying.

Perhaps watching so much media in Japanese had affected my brain.

After all, I was known for being a fan of manga and anime and anything Japan-related. I loved the language and I loved its culture so I had started learning the language along my degree in media studies.

However, I had only been taking lessons for a little more than a year and the large man in front of me was talking so fast it all sounded like gibberish to me.

"Um… hello," I spoke slowly, looking from one man to the other. "Excuse me, where are we?"

They looked at me strangely, before the scarred man answered. I looked back at him clueless.

"Slower, please," I asked him and he laughed at me.

"Kawa… no… kuni," he repeated as if I were dumb, which I probably sounded like to them.

The country of river or river country…? What the hell was that?

"Er… is that in Japan? In Honshu?" I asked.

He looked back at me strangely before repeating river country again.

Great… I had no idea what he meant.

He spoke to me again and I gave up trying to understand him.

"I'm sorry," I told him in English, hoping he might understand me. "I don't understand. Do you speak English by any chance?"

His small, beady eyes grew wide in astonishment as I spoke and he quickly turned to his companion, muttering away in Japanese again.

So much for them speaking English.

The second I looked away, the scarred man was suddenly before me and grabbed my arm, catching me by surprise. I tried to snatch my arm back but he roughly pushed me the ground, causing me to cry out in pain. I tried to overthrow him but his grip was too strong and his friend quickly stood above me, clasping my other arm behind my back.

Oh my God!

Panic seized me. I was completely helpless against two strong men and I had no idea what they would do to me. For a moment, I thought they might try to rape me before I felt my hands being securely tied behind my back with thick rope.

"What the hell are you doing?" I shouted, as the creepy one roughly pulled me back to my feet. "Let go of me!"

I tried to pull myself out of their grasp, kicking and screaming, trying anything I could without the use of my hands. It was all in vain and the scarred man grabbed me by the throat and held his knife close to my face in a threatening manner.

I immediately fell quiet, my eyes staring in horror at the glinting blade.

My heart raced inside my chest.

My attacker watched me with narrowed, unfriendly eyes until I heard him distinctly telling me to stop fighting.

I nodded, frightened to death, and not knowing what else to do.

I was at their complete mercy and all sorts of horrible things ran through my mind as I watched the scarred man go through my jacket and shirt as his friend kept a strong hold on my shoulder.

What the hell was happening? Where the hell was I and where were my friends? Why was I in the middle of nowhere where people only spoke Japanese?

I was so scared, I couldn't think. Tears were already forming in the corner of my eyes but I didn't dare to wipe them away as I was terrified of what would happen next. What on earth was I supposed to do? Who could help me? I couldn't think of a way to escape, but I knew that the moment I could, I had to run and find the police or someone for help.

The scarred man packed up his belongings along with mine and set off down the dirt road as his friend pushed me along, ordering me to walk.

Don't panic, Luce, don't panic, you're alright, I repeated to myself like a mantra. They haven't tried to do anything to you yet and you'll find a way out of this before they do. Just think about it logically.

Minutes slipped by painfully, but gradually my state of panic began to recede as we merely kept walking down the road. My heartbeat began to settle and I was able to focus again and not let my fear blind me. I had to figure out a way to escape. No matter where I was, I realised the most important thing at the moment was getting away from the two thugs that had captured me for no reason. They made me walk slightly ahead of them so they could keep an eye on me at all times, preventing me from running away.

It was the only plan I could think of at that point and although I was a good runner, I knew they would probably catch me before I could even break into a sprint, especially with my hands tied. I was also horribly dehydrated in the hot weather and felt incredibly tired. The adrenaline pumping in my veins could probably give me an advantage but I knew I had to wait for a distraction before breaking away.

After a while I heard them talking behind me and tried to pick up bits of their conversation but their use of slang made it hard to understand.

At one point I picked up the suffix "-sama" and realised they were probably talking about their boss or at least the person they were taking me to.

"Who?" I asked, turning around and cutting into their conversation. I'd always been too curious for my own good. "Sama? Who are you talking about?"

The scarred man smirked. "Orochimaru-sama."

I stopped and stared. "Orochimaru?" I repeated warily and watched them closely wondering if they were playing a joke on me.

They merely stared back until the creeper taunted me. "Are you scared now?"

I furrowed my brows instead in utter confusion. Orochimaru? The only Orochimaru I could think of was a manga character. The thought made me smile before I could stop myself and when my kidnappers saw my reaction they seemed confused in turn.

Was Orochimaru an actual given name in Japan? I didn't know but perhaps their boss had decided for some reason to call himself that. For all I knew, it could be a highly popular name in Japan. In any case, Naruto was fiction. It was just silly thinking the person the thugs were talking about had any link with the manga character.

Clearly, my fear and anxiety were not making me think straight.

The scarred man pushed me forward and we started walking again. In the end, the Orochimaru guy didn't really matter since I had to escape before reaching wherever it was they were taking me. All I needed was a little outside help.

The walk was long and tedious especially with my arms starting to ache and my mouth turning dry. I was desperate for water but decided against asking anything from the two thugs behind me. All I could think about was escaping instead. It wasn't until at least a good hour had passed by that a couple of dark shadows appeared up ahead on the dirt road and gave me hope. I was so happy and relieved to finally see other people that I almost jumped in joy and rushed ahead, but instead I forced myself to remain calm for my escape to work.

I was scared my two kidnappers would try to hide me or change route but I heard them rambling on behind me instead. They didn't seem too bothered about letting other people see me but since it worked to my advantage I thought nothing of it.

The two figures were headed our way and my mind rushed to think of all the possible ways to escape my kidnappers. Surely the two strangers would see my state of distress and help me, but whatever happened I was ready to launch myself at them if it meant being free from my kidnappers. I only hoped the two strangers would quickly notice my situation and call for help or the police.

As we drew closer, I noticed the figures were dressed in dark clothing that hid their whole body and wore large hats hiding their faces in a suspicious manner. I turned to watch my kidnappers for their reaction, but they were still talking among themselves apparently not giving a damn. My eyes latched once more onto my saviours heading our way and as we drew closer, their clothing became more and more apparent.

What started out as dark clothing turned into long black cloaks with red patches. The large hats turned out to be conical straw hats with decorative tassels and bells dangling from the sides.

The more I walked, the more their appearance became clearer until I stopped and my jaw sagged open in shock.

What. The. Hell?

These guys… are dressed like Akatsuki, I thought in utter astonishment, my eyes gazing incredulously at their clothing. Why are they dressed like Akatsuki? What the hell is going on?

First the thugs mentioned the name Orochimaru and now some weirdos were dressed up as Akatsuki members!

Something was seriously wrong.

Unless…

Unless I had walked into some sort of giant Naruto role-playing game and it was all just for show. Maybe it was all just an act.

I turned to face my kidnappers again except the looks they gave me didn't seem to be a game at all. The scarred one pushed me forward, muttering something I couldn't understand but from the tone of his voice, I knew it was a threat.

Shit, what now? What was I supposed to do now?

I quickly came to the conclusion that no matter what was happening I wanted answers and if my kidnappers weren't going to give them, then I would ask the Akatsuki members up ahead.

The bells attached to their hats tingled softly as they continued to walk. Neither of them spoke and as they approached I was more and more impressed with their outfits. Everything matched perfectly, from their open-toed boots to the white tassels dangling from their hats. They looked pretty awesome up close but it seemed my kidnappers didn't care at all as they kept talking.

I was frustrated by their lack of reaction.

I didn't understand why they weren't acknowledging the people ahead so I stopped yet again and patiently waited for the Akatsuki guys to reach us. I felt the scarred man's hand clamp down on my shoulder and push me forward, but I stood my ground and nodded my head at the newcomers.

They both frowned hard at me.

"What?" the creepy guy asked, talking slowly so I could understand. "What are you staring at? Keep moving!"

I realised they had no intention of interacting with the Akatsuki guys thus messing up my plan, so I decided to put them on the spot instead. Turning to the cloaked figures, I deliberately pointed my head at them and exclaimed.

"Akatsuki!"

The cloaked figures stopped in their tracks and my kidnappers' eyes went wide.

However, they still didn't acknowledge the two men standing beside me and kept their eyes fixed on me instead.

Without warning, the scarred guy growled and struck me hard in the face. The force knocked me off my feet and I fell to the ground, wincing in pain as my shoulder cushioned the blow since my hands were still tied.

I heard the man above me roar something about not saying that name out loud but I barely listened. The sting of the blow took me completely by surprise and brought tears to my eyes. Something warm trickled down my chin and when I licked my lips, I realised it was blood. I couldn't believe the thug had actually hit me... and damn, it freaking hurt!

Still dazed, I awkwardly managed to sit up and carefully wiped my split-lip and chin on my shoulder before noticing one of the Akatsuki guys hovering above me.

It was only then that I realised I had literally fallen at his feet.

Looking up, I saw past the large hat and partially distinguished the man's face. His cloak covered him up to his nose, but his eyes were clearly visible and my heart jumped when I saw them.

Bright red eyes with three tomoe framed by strands of black hair.

Calm down, it's okay, it's just contact lenses.

Slowly, ever so slowly, a purple nail-polished hand appeared reaching for the hat and slid it off, revealing raven black hair and a Konoha nukenin headband. The man knelt down before me, his red eyes staring into mine and I looked back, completely dumbfounded.

He looked like an exact real-life replica of Itachi Uchiha.

The resemblance was so uncanny, I couldn't stop staring and if I wasn't in such a state of shock, I surely would have remembered to blush. Unlike the two thugs that had captured me, the man kneeling before me was simply put: gorgeous.

It took me a few seconds to realise that the scarred man and his friend were still shouting above me and I turned to face them again. They weren't looking at the Akatsuki at all.

It was so strange.

They were standing right there in front of me and "Itachi" and yet they weren't acknowledging him.

What the hell is going on?

I turned back to "Itachi" and noticed his eyes were closed. Abruptly, the second Akatsuki guy shifted and growled. "Itachi-san."

His voice made me jump and when I looked again at Itachi, his eyes slowly reopened and looked completely different; some sort of three-pointed black swirl within a pool of red. It looked dangerous and pretty cool at the same time and it took me a few seconds to recognise the Mangekyou Sharingan.

I was shocked.

How on earth did his change his contacts like that?

I didn't have time to think on it, however, as I noticed my kidnappers had gone strangely silent and the atmosphere around me became incredibly tense.

Something had happened, I realised. Suddenly, the scarred man and creepy dude were staring wide-eyed at the Akatsuki guys as if they had just appeared. As if they hadn't been there all along.

The whole situation was completely surreal and I didn't know what to make of it.

"You didn't… see them?" I asked, grateful I could remember how to use the past tense correctly. I silently hoped I didn't sound like an idiot right then.

The scarred man looked down at me and then back up at the cloaked figures before taking a step back.

When I turned to face "Itachi" again, I realised he was still staring at me, a frown on his face.

And then he spoke, his voice deep, yet soft and so very familiar. I was completely enthralled. It took me a few seconds to realise that he was actually talking to me and was expecting an answer.

Feeling like an idiot, I quickly told him I didn't understand.

The creepy dude snickered ahead. "Don't bother, she won't understand you."

The scarred man hit his arm in warning. "Shut it, you idiot!"

"It doesn't matter," the creep continued. "They would have noticed eventually. Now we might actually get a decent deal."

I looked back and forth between my two kidnappers wondering what the hell was being said until I noticed the look of surprise on "Itachi"'s face.

After a beat, his face turned blank again and he stood up, fully facing the two thugs.

"Where are you taking her?" he asked them, his voice yet again incredibly familiar.

"Orochimaru," the creepy dude answered, as his friend shifted nervously beside him.

"Look," the scarred man began, his gaze shifting between "Itachi" and his friend. "We don't want any trouble. We were going to sell her to Orochimaru. He's always looking for interesting test subjects and she isn't from around here. She can't even speak our language so I'm sure he'll be interested. But if you want her instead, we'll sell her to you for a fair price."

I didn't know what to do. I was sitting on my butt between four grown men and didn't understand what the hell was being said except that it was about me. It was truly one of the most awkward situations I'd ever been in and I wasn't reassured at all.

"So, do we have a deal?" the creeper asked, taking a step forward.

"No," Itachi's voice rang out and, without warning, my kidnappers fell to their knees, gasping, their eyes wide in terror and their mouths open in a silent scream. The creep passed out, falling to the ground and his friend soon followed.

What the -!

Fear and adrenaline rushed through me as I watched the scene and I abruptly got up on my feet ignoring the pain in my arm and legs. I didn't think I'd ever moved so fast in my life as I backed away from Itachi and his friend, not knowing whether they were friend or foe.

Dark, onyx eyes stared at me in return.

"Kisame, cut her hands free," Itachi said to his friend. I went tense at his words expecting some sort of attack.

Kisame disappeared from my sight and I jumped in fright when he suddenly reappeared behind me. I could barely try to understand what had happened when I felt something cool on my wrists and my hands became free.

I spun around, facing the taller man behind me and my eyes zeroed in on the knife he held in one hand, before noticing the fucking giant sword strapped to his back.

Once again, I immediately stepped away. I didn't understand what was happening. I didn't know what they wanted from me and my mind kept running wild with all kinds of absurd theories about what was happening to me.

Impossible things were happening before my eyes. Things I couldn't logically explain and yet I simply refused to believe the impossible.

Noticing my two kidnappers were still out cold, I slowly sidestepped towards them, keeping an eye on Itachi and his friend before snatching my belongings back and clutching them to my chest as if they could protect me.

Neither Akatsuki made a move towards me reassuring me slightly and giving me time to gather my thoughts.

"What…" I paused, trying to phrase a coherent sentence, but it still took a few tries before I could spit it out. "What do you want?"

Itachi spoke in a calm voice. "Who are you? How are you not affected by the Sharingan?"

Although he spoke slowly, I could only understand the first question. His friend or partner, Kisame, as he'd called him, watched me closely after hearing Itachi's questions.

"My name is Lucy," I answered, remembering how to introduce myself. "I am from England. Do you know it? England?"

"England?" Kisame repeated, confused.

"I guess you guys don't understand English then, right?" I asked just in case they might. "Do you have a phone with you I could use by any chance?"

I mimed what I thought was the universal sign for phone, bringing my hand up to my ear but all I got in return were blank faces. They probably thought I was a fool, but it didn't matter. I had to get the hell out of this goddamn forest and find a way home. I wasn't liking what I was seeing and I didn't feel anymore safe than I did with the two thugs, although at least the Akatsuki lookalikes had cut my hands free.

"As interesting as this looks, we need to keep moving, Itachi-san," Kisame spoke up.

"She's coming with us."

"Why?" Kisame asked, intrigued. "Because she wasn't affected by your genjutsu?"

"Aa."

I had no idea what they were saying once more but when Kisame turned to face me again, I tried to focus on his words.

"Oi, kid! Follow us."

"I'm eighteen years old," I retorted in a quiet voice, wary of how they might react.

Kisame smirked. "Well what do you know? Looks like she can communicate with us just fine. I have a feeling this trip is going to be fun."

I didn't like the way he looked at me as he spoke but I tried not to show it. Itachi put his large hat back on, hiding his face again and they soon turned their backs on me, continuing down the road the way they went.

They're expecting me to follow them, I thought incredulously as I watched them walk away. They're just walking away and not even keeping an eye on me.

Well now was my chance to make an escape! Turning in the other direction, I shot off before they could notice, sprinting away as fast as I could.

Run, Lucy! I kept shouting in my mind. Fucking run and find help!

However, within seconds a shadow blurred in front of me causing me to stop dead.

Catching my breath, I watched in disbelief as Kisame stood in front of me, a large grin on his hidden face. I quickly looked back to where he had been seconds before.

How? How did he run that fast?

"And just where do you think you're running off to, girl?"

I was so confused, I didn't know what to say. Finally his hand slowly tilted his straw hat upwards, revealing his face - a pale blue face with small, round eyes and gill-like facial markings underneath.

I nearly screamed, fainted and had a heart attack all in one second.

It's make-up, I told myself, trying to calm down my erratic heartbeat. Don't be an idiot, Luce, it's just make-up.

And then the blue monster before me smiled and I noticed his teeth were filed into sharp points and all I could think of was the headless horseman in Sleepy Hollow.

Oh God…

My mind couldn't wrap itself around this one. It looked so damn real…

"Now run along back to Itachi-san," Kisame ordered and catching the gist of his words, I backed away from him and ran back down the road hoping to put some distance between us.

Itachi stood just ahead watching me closely and when I reached him, he set off again.

..~**~..

Thank you for reading till the end!

This story really helps keep my creative juices flowing especially when I come across writer's block for Bad Romance so please no flaming! Constructive criticism is more than welcome.

So, just to be clear Itachi was using genjutsu which is why the thugs couldn't see them. Lucy could because of a very simple reason which will be explained in the next chapter.

The language barrier won't be around forever and Lucy will have shinobi skills later :)

So what do you think? Promising or bleh...?