Author's Note: This chapter has a mature and sensitive scenario of loss. Please be advised.

| BONUS TWO, The Despair Keeps Me Frozen |

"Wow…that was…wow," Scott expressed, Isaac rolling off of his sweaty back and onto his own back, his bare front free for all to see. "We're not going two weeks without doing that anymore." He looked over at Isaac and the blonde nodded, his eyes almost glazed over as he stared up at their ceiling.

"I'm gonna' go take a shower," Isaac said rather depressedly as he stood up.

"Alright," Scott said in almost the exact same tone, slight disappointment mixed in as well.

"What?" Isaac said, stopping to look back.

"Nothing," Scott retorted tersely, standing, too, but to slip his clothes back on. Isaac walked into the shower while Scott finished. "I'm gonna' go check the mail; do you want anything from Jacqui's?"

"No," Isaac mumbled.

Scott just shook his head and left. He took his time, his mind gazing in upon itself and what had just happened. The perfect day. The perfect sex. And now this. Again. When he got to 'Jacqui's Beanery' he ordered a latte for himself and sat down outside to enjoy the new Autumn evening. He breathed slowly, unable to shake his frustration very well this time, exacerbated even further by the fact that they made his coffee too damn hot once again and that he was almost ready to go back in there and complain when his phone buzzed.

'Where are you?' read the text from Isaac and that's when he noticed he'd been gone for 40 minutes. Instead of replying, Scott took one more sip and began to make his way back up.

"Hey, sorry lost track of time," Scott said as he walked back into their apartment.

"What were you doing; I was a little worried?"

"Just sitting; seemed like you needed some space."

"I didn't," Isaac almost snapped. Scott didn't say anything but his silence and look of disbelief said it all. He walked into the living room and sat down on the couch where Danny had been sitting the night before. "You don't believe me?" Again, Scott said nothing. "That's just wonderful, Scott. You know I don't think about her all the time, but thank you for putting Maddie back in my head."

"Don't blame this on me!" Scott said, standing up, almost spilling his latte in the process. "Forgive me for assuming that withdrawing into the shower had something to do with this morning. Forgive me for assuming that Maddie is running through your brain all the time because that's what I see."

"Great, now you're putting thoughts in my head. Would you like to put words in my mouth next?"

"What am I supposed to think, Isaac!? We don't talk about. You don't talk about. I'm not allowed to talk about it. And it's been like this for two years! I can't bear seeing the man I love eating himself up inside every goddamn day. Withdrawing from me. Turning away. Acting like nothing's wrong and not letting me be there for him. I get it, life wasn't fair. We didn't deserve to lose her. But it wasn't anyone's fault either. Not Fay's. Not mine. Not yours! It just happened. And we can't change that. But I'm losing you. I'm losing you so much that I can't even marry the man I love because he can't let me in. He can't let go. He can't see that while he's living in that dark moment in the past, I'm still here. With open arms. Waiting for him. Wanting him to let me hold him every time he needs to cry or bitch or fight. But I get none of that. There's just the dark shell. Every day. And I dunno' what to do anymore." When Scott stopped speaking, it was only then that it registered that Isaac's furious expression had diminished, that it was now burnt down to sorrow and tears. That Isaac didn't look hurt by what Scott had said, but that he couldn't believe that truth had slammed into him so hard.

"I—" Isaac tried to say but he couldn't, and Scott, being Scott, just walked up to him and took the blonde into his arms. Isaac unleashed his full emotions in that moment. Finally, really weeping for the first time since their unborn daughter was lost to them. Scott cradled him, tears even running down his own face as he thought back to the beginning of that eighth month when the couple and Fay went in for a standard checkup. And then she was just gone. Maddie was no longer their soon-to-be daughter. She was no longer that ray of hope Isaac—they—had always wanted. She was gone. Somehow. It wasn't fair. It wasn't right. And yet, it didn't matter. And they were stuck with no way to cope.

Scott pulled Isaac over to the longer sofa and sat against one of the arms so Isaac could stretch out, resting his head in Scott's lap. The brunette caressed his head, running his hand through Isaac's still-damp curls. Scott laid his head back, doing his best to clamp his tears and fight down that painful lump in his throat. "I love you, Isaac Lahey. I always will." Isaac only nodded, his hand squeezing into the base of Scott's thigh as those words forced him to let loose even further.

| ICE |

Scott awoke 30 minutes later by a buzz in his pocket. Carefully, trying not to wake the sleeping blonde in his lap, he dug his phone out and answered it. "Hey mom," he said, bringing his other hand up to his eyes to rub them so he'd wake up enough to talk. … "We're alright, how are you?" … "I'm sorry. Have you heard anything about the raise?" … "Well that's a good thing, right?" … "Just work. Oh, Danny came over last night." … "Yeah, Māhealani. He and his boyfriend. They're visiting his folks while they're in town but I think they go back to Spain sometime next week." … "Yeah, it was nice to see them It's been a while." … "Yeah, I cooked believe it or not," Scott said with a laugh. "You know me, I've gotten way better at it." … "Thanks, mom," he retorted, frowning. … "How's, Michael?" … "You guys doing okay?" … "Well, as long as he treats you right I'm happy." … "Yes, I still promise not to 'bare my fangs' at him." … "We're, uh, we're okay. Today was interesting to say the least." … "No, I just, uh, it was just rough tonight." … "Mom! Not that kinda' rough," he said, reddening. "It's just…Stiles called me this morning and they're taking in a little girl." … "Yeah, Maddie. It's just…hard," he said with a deep straining sigh. "I'm…handling it. I'm just trying to look out for Isaac, though." … "I know, I am. I promise. But he's just, he's devastated." … "Maybe. I'd be lying if that thought hadn't crossed my mind. But that's why I need to put him first. I've never seen him like this." … "No, I haven't. I don't wanna' force him to talk to—I know it wouldn't be forcing him. But I don't want to say the wrong thing and make it sound like I am. Maybe I'll propose it sometime in the future, but tonight I actually felt like I may have gotten through to him." … "I just…I guess I just snapped. We both did, but I really did. But he…something seemed to click. I dunno.' He just…it didn't perpetuate into a full-blown fight. He's actually asleep right here." … "No, I wouldn't have said anything if I weren't sure." … "Alright, mom, I love you, too." … "I will. And he loves you, too. Tell Michael I said 'hi.'" .. "Night." Scott hung up the phone and placed it on the armrest. He looked down and just focused on Isaac's steady heartbeat and breathing: if he were awake, he was a damn good faker. He let out another deep exhale and a small smile tugged at his lips. "I love you, baby," he whispered, combing his curls with his fingers once again.