The third generation of this series of seemingly random reincarnation was that of the Red Hot Habanero and her best friend's husband, known in this world as Lily Luna Potter and James Sirius Potter.
…Yeah, you should run like hell now.
o.o.o.o.o
Unlike the previous two generations of reincarnations, these two were raised by a pair of people who were reincarnations themselves. And well aware of the possibility. And… familiar.
o.o.o.o.o
The moment that Fugaku had gotten used enough to his infantile ears to accurately start picking up noises and words, he started to listen. Half the time, he heard the people around him speaking a language he didn't understand at all, and half the time, he understood all too well.
Which is why he was a little… concerned.
The man that was supposedly his 'father' in this life, had the same name as his son in his first life. Or, sometimes he did. Sometimes he was referred to as "Hari," though Fugaku couldn't make heads or tails of it. But then he figured out a way to more or less end the confusion… sort of.
He was so quiet, most of the time, that any loud noise brought at least one parent down fairly quickly, even if it was with some strange, sharp noise that no shunshin should have. So when he started wailing (ugh, how embarrassing), he was pleased to see that his supposed "father" was down within seconds.
Of course, that meant that he stopped with the ridiculous noise just as soon as he heard the crack that signaled the entrance of one or the other. Wide awake, thankfully, as it was midday on a weekend, and seeming rather confused.
"C'mere…"
Hari reached into the crib and pulled him out, but rapid slapping and hitting from tiny hands prevented the man from pulling the baby to his chest to bounce him back to sleep.
One eyebrow raised, Hari stared at his supposed son, mildly confused. "…Well?"
"Are you taunting the baby?" A female voice, the mother of the house, called down.
"No, I think he's trying to taunt me!"
"Bullsh*t!"
"Now, now, language!"
"That's not what you said last night!"
Fugaku was now officially disturbed for life.
In an attempt to distract himself from the exceedingly uncomfortable conversation, he started smacking Hari's arm again.
Green eyes darted back to him. "Okay, what?"
Fugaku turned on his Sharingan, and waited.
And waited.
And waited.
"Karin, get your ginger a** down here now."
"Stop talking about my—"
"Sharingan baby!"
"…I'll be down in a second."
o.o.o.o.o
Oh god.
Sasuke put his face into his hands.
What a mind-f*ck.
The man that had been his father in one life was his son in this one.
How messed up was that?
Someone really hated him.
…He was going to call up Sirius with this. He needed someone to bother with the information. And maybe he could get Tonks and Teddy to come over as well. Getting one or both to imitate old family members would be fun.
Hm…
Oh.
Oh no.
He and Karin had been…
They'd been talking about…
In front of…
Oh, f*cknuggets.
…He was definitely pressing this problem onto Sirius for a few hours. He needed a drink.
"If you're going to a pub, you are not leaving me here."
Apparently, so did Karin.
o.o.o.o.o
Al, dear, sweet Al… was normal. Even one normal child was a handful, but it was a handful they were grateful for.
Unfortunately, Lily was not only abnormal, but also more of a handful than a regular child.
o.o.o.o.o
"Naruto's mother." Sasuke blinked at Karin, who huffed and crossed her arms.
"Yes, I already explained it to you."
"A former Jinchuuriki."
"Yes."
"The… 'Red Hot Habanero?'"
"Yes, Sasuke."
"…So Al is our only normal kid?"
"Looks like it."
"…This makes me sad."
o.o.o.o.o
Sasuke pulled the silly string off of his hair, dreading what would happen the further in he walked.
"Daddy!" Al ran into his legs, hugging tightly. "Lily and James are fighting again!"
"…What about Mommy?"
"Aunty Hermy said she wanted to talk to her about Raven stuff." Al answered, hiding behind his father's leg. "Can you go make Lily and James stop now?"
"I can try, Al."
o.o.o.o.o
"No dragons."
"But it would be awesome!"
"Lily Luna Potter. Uzumaki Kushina. No. Dragons."
"What if I ask Uncle Charlie to—"
"No."
"…Can I at least get a pet fox?"
"You take joy in my misery, don't you?"
o.o.o.o.o
"Harry, Harry, Harry." Sirius slung an arm over his godson's shoulder. "Your daughter is going to be an amazing prankster in a few years."
"You do realize that she is the reincarnation of an extremely dangerous woman with a horrible temper and a penchant for pranks on the level of painting monuments, right?"
"…Your daughter is amazing. Can I adopt her from you?"
"Karin would kill me, so no."
o.o.o.o.o
A/N: While the premise for this one was amusing, the execution fell flat. To be fair, I had more ideas for the omake than for the actual story.
SEQUEL! Do I have your attention? Okay, so there might be a sequel, or a similar situation, anyway. Probably another hair-color name.
PLEASE go read my new SnK story, as well as my SnK/Naruto stories. Only getting a few reviews for each chapter makes me feel naked after so many stories where I actually have a significant 'haul' each time. If you've reviewed here, review there too. It'll make me happy!
o.o.o.o.o
Omake: Madara as Sirius, Suigetsu as Draco, Juugo as Charlie, Kurama as Hugo, Minato as Scorpius, Mikoto as Lysander
"Oi, Sasuke." Karin walked in, an amused grin on her face, and handed him the phone. "It's Hermione."
Sasuke raised an eyebrow, but took the phone and put it to his ear. "Yes?"
"HARRY JAMES POTTER!"
He winced and pulled away a bit.
"WHY IS MY SON CLAIMING TO BE SOME DEMON FOX LORD THAT WANTS TO KILL ANYONE WITH THOSE RIDICULOUSLY OVERPOWERED EYES OF YOURS?"
Sasuke dropped the phone. He stared at it. He started to laugh.
Karin raised an eyebrow. "Well?"
"J-just go get Lily."
o.o.o.o.o
"Sirius?"
"If you expect me to interact with your brats, I'm going to stab you."
"Can you babysit? Karin and I—"
"F*ck. You."
o.o.o.o.o
"Yo, Sasuke!" Suigetsu pulled himself out of the Floo, tugging Scorpius along behind him.
"Suigetsu, what the h*ll are you doing in my house?" Karin stepped forward, demanding.
He waved her off, raising his son's hand a little. "Reincarnation. Yondaime Hokage. I remembered what you said about Lily and—"
"MINATO!"
o.o.o.o.o
Karin dropped to her knees, hand over mouth, giggling. The letter in her other hand fell to the ground.
"Should I ask?"
"S-Sasuke-kun," Karin continued to giggle. "Apparently, one of the reincarnations didn't fit in with hair color or sex."
"Eh?"
"Your mother was reincarnated as Lysander Scamander. Luna just told me."
There was a loud crash from the kitchen as Fugaku dropped a plate.
o.o.o.o.o
"D***it, whelp, let go of me!"
"Hm... nope! Oi, Minato!"
"...Hey, Kushina-chan. Why... why is, er, Hugo in a dress?"