Dear Code Geass Fanfiction Authors

Disclaimer: I own nothing. This idea is not original. It was inspired by Sariniste's story of the same title in the Bleach fandom, who was in turned inspired by bla in the bla fandom and so on.

Warning: Author idea bash, bash bash! Hints of yaoi and hetero pairings and stuffs... Just what you would find in the fandom. Beware, though, for more yaoi hints (especially this one) because I'm a SuzaLulu shipper and author! :)

IX: Please don't take this seriously. It's just... poking fun of authors. And I am included as one of them. Just a humorous approach because I find myself lacking the humor in my other story that was supposed to be a humor... And I lost the mood, I think. So, on the path to regaining the humor!

...One can't get funny when their finals are next week. Why am I even posting this...? More like, how can I even touch the computer to post this? 0.0

Chapter 1: Lelouch

Dear Lifeless Code Geass Fanfiction Authors,

I have recently stumbled upon your site, and, clearly, it seems that you all have been misinformed.

While I have, indeed, cross dressed once in a OVA - partly because of rabid fan girls, AKA you -, I was merely a subject of torment of one female, no, devil. A devil that goes by the name of Milly Ashford. I do not see how one of her mindless, pure evil act can manage to spark your interest and parade behind her, contributing to this... apocalypse.

Also, I would never, ever willingly dress up as a maid. You hear me? Never. So why is it that some of you - one of you - think that I would actually work in a Maid Cafe?

And why is it that you people think that after I dress up as a female or a maid, I would somehow miraculously seduce Suzaku? Suzaku is my best friend! He is my childhood friend, my very first friend. He is supposedly to be paired up with Euphemia - which I accidentally killed, because I lost control of my Geass, not because of jealousy. Heck, he's the person that killed me!

...And why is it that I have to bottom? I, Lelouch vi Britannia - the Eleventh Prince of Britannia; Zero - the most infamous and successful terrorist ever existed; and the Demon Emperor - the most hated and feared man ever existed, would actually be submissive?

Not only that, I would never degrade myself into being a moaning mess. Nor would I squeal and whimper like a girl. Carnal pleasures are for lifeless people like you who don't have a world to destroy and create anew.

Dear Code Geass Fanfiction authors, I really fear for your life. As much as it is just a mere useless existence, a human life is a human life. Therefore, if you have just a tiny bit of concern for your own life, I sincerely advise you to immediately cease writing this... this... abomination!

Yours not sincerely,
Lelouch vi Britannia

PS: Did I see something wrong here...? Me and... Nunnally?! I might have a minor sister complex (or what you would so politely refer as sis con), I would never do... that to Nunnally! She is my sister, you get it? Sister! She is a untainted, pure being!

I think I'll have to wash my eyes now.

IX: So... How is it? First time trying this thing, and I'm also still new at the site. So... yea. Because Lelouch have too much things to poke on, Lelouch will always send letters here. As for the PS thing, with the Nunnally thing... You see, I've never had the guts to click on a Lelouch/Nunnally story, so I have no idea what it is about. Except for incest. Yup. Not like I mind incest, but I can't see incest with Nunnally. Sorry to all fans out there!

Please Rate and Review! I'm not terribly confident with my writing abilities. You can request any characters you want and also ideas for what to poke on etc. I'll try to comply!

Go easy on me.

Signing out, LeAwesomeOne IX