Mikau: Greetings! For those of you that know me, it's great to see you again! For all the newcomers, welcome, and thank you for taking an interest in my work! Without any further ado, on with the show. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: If I owned it, there would be more plot-relevant episode per season. Or maybe there would be less because I'd be too busy writing pointless, mushy, shounen ai scenes. Hmm. Tough call.

…

In the Closet

(In More Ways Than One)

"Can't you just do something?" Saguru sighed, trying to take up as little room as possible in the cramped janitor's closet.

"What d'ya want me to do?" Kuroba snorted indignantly as he fidgeted on his side of the invisible line they had wordlessly drawn between them.

"Pick the lock," Saguru suggested.

"There's no lock to pick on this side," the magician retorted. "Somebody didn't think this through very well."

"Do you suppose Koizumi-san will come back for us?" the blonde wondered wishfully.

"Nope," Kuroba replied curtly. "She locked us in here for a reason; she's not gonna just change her mind and come back to school in the middle of the night to let us out…. What time is it?"

"Eight forty-five and twent—"

"—Just the hour and the minutes is fine," the vexing brunette cut him off.

Saguru snorted, drawing his knees into his chest.

"Don't get huffy with me. You know it's annoying when you do that seconds and milliseconds thing," Kuroba grumbled.

"Is it?" Saguru muttered pensively. "Hm. I didn't know that."

"Is that that sarcasm thing you do?" His rival rolled his eyes. "I'm really not in the mood for it, Hakuba."

Saguru didn't respond. He turned his head to the side and started counting the number of bristles in the broom hanging to his right.

Kuroba harrumphed at Saguru's silence and took out a deck which he began to shuffle in various patterns.

"What time is it now?"

Saguru sighed. "Eight forty-six and…eight forty-six."

"God, this is taking forever," Kuroba growled under his breath. "Let's talk about something."

"You assume I wish to talk to you," the prideful detective mumbled. "Why don't you just carry on a conversation by yourself, Kuroba? You do seem to like to hear the sound of your own voice."

"Jerk," the magician batted back at him. "Fine. I make a better conversation partner than you do anyway."

And yet there was silence.

"I've got a riddle I bet you can't solve," Kuroba baited.

"Fine, Kuroba," Saguru conceded.

"You've got a candle, an oil lamp, and wood in the fireplace, but you only have one match. Which one do you light first?" Kuroba smirked, making his eyes focus in the dark on Saguru's face so that he could observe the sleuth's mental struggle.

That, after all, was the majority of the fun.

Saguru frowned. "Well, perhaps the candle or the oil lamp. It wouldn't be a good idea to try the firewood first, in case it didn't catch…. I don't see how there can only be one right answer."

Kuroba shrugged, looking rather full of himself. "I'd try the match first."

Saguru glared at his classmate as the thief sniggered. "Try this one then, if you're so clever: what can you share but still have all for yourself?"

Kuroba paused, and a thoughtful look came onto his face. "Well, it's not dessert, that's for sure."

"Animals really do think with their stomachs, don't they?" Saguru chuckled.

Kuroba shrugged. "Animals have a lot more sense than humans. I'd of thought your Watson would of taught you that."

Saguru quickly found himself without a reply.

"Is it love?" Kuroba hazarded a guess after a few moments of silent thought.

"Knowledge," Saguru corrected.

"Shoulda known," the joker chortled. "My turn. A butcher at the marketplace is five foot ten. What does he weigh?"

Saguru blinked. "I'm afraid I don't have all the information I need to deduce his weight. What is his ethnicity? His social status? Is he married or a bachelor? Is he of average weight for a man of his height?"

"Hakuba, you're trying to make this too hard. He's a butcher. They guy weighs meat," Kuroba snickered, a little less maliciously this time.

Saguru blinked again. "Oh. I suppose that would make sense."

"Ask me another," his adversary urged as he shifted to lie down in a yoga pose with his legs going up the wall.

Saguru thought for a moment. "I have six faces, but I never wear makeup. I have twenty-one eyes, but I cannot see. What am I?"

"Probably really ugly, if you've got six faces, that many eyes, and don't wear any makeup," Saguru's fellow captive tittered. "Some kind of mythical Greek monstrosity?"

"Seriously." Saguru gave a peeved little snort.

"Seriously? Faces, huh?" Kuroba pursed his lips. "Not a clock tower. Eyes…faces…"

The cards started going through the air in elegant arcs once more.

"Dice," Kuroba finally decided.

Saguru nodded. "Now, a serious riddle for me, if you please."

Kuroba smirked, carefully swinging his legs around underneath him and sitting up. "I drive men mad for love of me," Kuroba purred, sending shivers down Saguru's spine. "Easily beaten, never free—what am I?"

Saguru's brain was a little blank at the moment. He couldn't really think with Kuroba staring so intently at him, wearing that self-satisfied grin on his lips.

Saguru looked away. "I don't know."

"You sure?" Kuroba hummed thoughtfully. "So soon?"

Kuroba shrugged when the detective didn't answer. "Gold. Your turn."

"…Alive without breath, as cold as death, never thirsty, ever drinking, when tired, never winking…what am I?"

Kuroba frowned and started mumbling to himself. He wrestled over it for about five whole minutes before he finally gave up. "Alright, what's the answer?"

"A fish," Saguru replied with a half-hearted shrug.

The brunette twitched, causing the blonde to frown in confusion.

"Let's talk about something else," Kuroba suggested, shifting his position again.

"And what did you wish to discuss with me?" Saguru raised an eyebrow at his cellmate's strange reaction.

"Not much, unfortunately," the thief sighed, scratching the top of his head, messing his unruly hair up even more.

The pair lapsed into silence once more until Kuroba sighed, "What do you want to talk about?"

"…"

"Might as well." The detective mentally crossed his fingers. "How do you really feel about Nakamori Aoko-kun?"

Kuroba blinked and gave Saguru an appraising look before answering. "She's precious to me, but I don't feel for her the same way she feels for me. If you're askin' 'cause you're interested in her, don't worry. I'm no competition; I've only been acting like it because she deserves the best. It's my way of protecting her and weeding out the trash." The brunette paused for a moment before adding as almost an afterthought, "You pass, by the way…even though you're an ass sometimes. I know you're a good man. You're the kind of guy she should end up with."

Blushing, the blonde turned away, but it was hard to hide his rosy cheeks from the thief in such close quarters. He could only hope that the dim lighting disguised his pinkish complexion. "Thank you, Kuroba. I understand what high praise that is, but, unfortunately, I am not interested in Aoko-kun."

"Oh, yeah?" Kuroba replied from low in his throat. "What's wrong with her?" Had he been a rattlesnake, his tail would have been shaking in warning.

"Nothing, Kuroba. I am simply not interested in her," Saguru explained, hoping his classmate would drop it.

No such luck.

"What? Are you gay or something?" Kuroba snorted.

It should have been so easy to just laugh and bark back a suitably insulted, "No."

Saguru had had plenty of practice.

Instead, he hesitated just a second too long, and when he realized his mistake and tried to correct it, thinking a late denial would be better than the condemning implications of total silence, he stuttered, "N-No."

Kuroba froze, body stiffening and eyes widening. His mouth dropped open in a small 'o' shape that would have been endearing, had Saguru not been busy being mortified at the moment.

"Why?" Saguru finally found his voice and snapped, biting his lip to keep the hot tears from falling. He would not let Kuroba see him cry. He would not, damn it all. "You're not one of those judgmental homophobes, are you?"

Kuroba looked away without answering, but Saguru noticed that the other boy seemed to be pressing himself as close to the wall and as far away from Saguru as he possibly could.

"It's not catching, you know," Saguru bit back bitterly.

Kuroba didn't respond.

"I'm going to sleep," Saguru snorted, making up an excuse to pull his legs to his chest and burry his face in his knees.

He felt utterly humiliated. Not only had his pride taken a beating as his rival discovered his hard-kept secret, but his hope had also been crushed. Whenever Kid had played around and flirted with the Taskforce (Saguru especially), the teen detective had always let himself take that as a sign that perhaps the other teen was capable of feelings for him after all.

It was a good thing that Saguru had had plenty of practice crying silently.

A good two minutes and thirty-five point four seconds had passed when Saguru felt something gently prodding him.

He looked up to find Kuroba poking him with a packet of tissues.

The magician was politely looking away to his right, pretending (rather convincingly) that he did not see the detective's tears.

"Th-Thank you," Saguru muttered, accepting the tissues and using them to mop up his face.

The class clown mumbled something in return, but it was so quiet that Saguru couldn't hear it.

"B-Beg pardon?"

"Sorry," Kuroba stated firmly, still not looking at Saguru. "I said I was sorry. My old man taught me better than that, and I'm sorry."

Saguru nodded. "Thank you, Kuroba."

After that, awkward silence reigned once more.

"Once upon a time, the world was full of men," Kuroba began at approximately nine twenty-three and forty-two point five seconds. "...so the gods decided to make a woman. They made her beautiful with long, flowing hair that shone like gold and sparkling eyes like sapphires. Her skin was tan like bronze, and when she spoke, her voice sounded like a bell. She was kind and clever and just the slightest bit mischievous. Her name was Pandora, meaning "all gifts" for she had been given every kind of gift by all of the gods.

"They gave her a beautiful box as a parting gift, telling her never to open it and sending her to Earth. All the men of Earth worshiped Pandora, for they had never seen another being like her before, and eventually she settled down and got married. Now, many years passed, and with each one Pandora's curiosity grew. She wanted to know what was inside the box that the gods had forbidden her from opening.

"When she finally gave in to curiosity and opened the box, all manner of terrible things came flying out—sickness, greed, sadness, poverty, death. By the time Pandora managed to get the lid shut once more, only one thing remained in the box, and that…was hope."

"I don't believe I've ever heard it told quite like that before," Saguru mused when it became evident that the other boy was not going to continue.

"'Cause you've never heard me tell it before," Kuroba replied in a boastful tone.

"Why tell that story?" Saguru inquired.

Kuroba shrugged, finally turning his head to look at the detective. "Something to do while we wait for somebody to come and let us out of here. Besides, I've recently developed an interest in Greek mythology."

Saguru nodded in thought.

"You tell one," Kuroba urged. "And none of your Holmes stuff, either, or else I'll start talking about Lupin."

Saguru grimaced. "I…don't really know many stories." It was a lie. Baaya had told him plenty of fairy tales when he was growing up, but, somehow, he didn't necessarily feel comfortable sharing them with his classmate.

"Make one up then," Kuroba sniffed. "And don't you dare tell me you've got no imagination. You would have to have one in order to come up with all that stuff about me being Kid."

Saguru frowned, but decided to humor the magician. "…Once upon a time…" he started slowly. "…there was a young boy—the son of a noblewoman—who lived out in the countryside. His father was a common man, a foreigner with whom his mother had had an affair when she was young. The boy was…not planned, to say the least. His mother had been engaged to another nobleman up until that point, and so his birth resulted in the breaking of the engagement, thus bringing great disgrace to the Griffin family name.

"The boy, his mother, and his nanny lived out in the countryside, effectively in exile, and the boy knew from a young age that he had done something very wrong; however, he would not find out until he was much older what exactly his sin had been."

Saguru paused, unsure of how to continue, but Kuroba was looking intently at him, patiently waiting for the rest of the story.

Saguru swallowed and went on. "His nanny was both mother and father to him as he grew, and while she was strict with him, teaching him how to be a proper gentleman, she was also kind and loving. She cared for him when he was sick and held him when he cried. She told him stories of the fair folk that lived in the forests just on the edge of their land.

"The boy wholeheartedly believed in these stories and often went searching for fairies, but one day when he was ten, he wandered a little too far into the forest and didn't make it back by dusk. Without a torch, the familiar terrain became foreign to him. He lost his way, lost his footing, and fell off a small overhang. His leg broke in several places, and his arm suffered a compound fracture as well.

"They didn't find him until morning, but when they did, his mother was on the verge of hysterics. When she found out he had been out there searching for fairies, she beat it into him that they didn't exist and that he was foolish, childish, and stupid." Saguru sighed, remembering the look on his mother's face. She had seemed to him like some manner of rabid beast.

"Then what?" Kuroba broke him out of his reverie.

"Sorry?" Saguru blinked.

"What happened to the boy after that?" Kuroba clarified, hanging on Saguru's every word. "He didn't give up, did he? He eventually found them, right?"

Saguru blinked again.

Kuroba thought Saguru was telling him an actual story.

Saguru frowned. "No. He more or less stopped believing after that. He stayed inside and read a lot while he was recovering. His mother forbid Baaya from telling him stories after the accident, and the boy never went searching for fairies ever again…. Well, at least not until he was a little older. His grandfather got him a microscope and a little scientist play kit, and the boy—"

"—You should give him a name," Kuroba interrupted. "Your protagonist has to have a name so that people can identify with him."

"Saguru," the boy himself proposed.

Kuroba rolled his eyes. "Saguru Griffin? That's a stupid name. You can't name him after yourself."

"Edward," Saguru sighed, defaulting to his middle name.

Kuroba gave his nod of approval.

"Where was I?" The narrator shook his head. "You've gotten me off track."

"Edward just got the science-y stuff," Kuroba reminded, looking at Saguru expectantly.

"Well, Edward put all the childish nonsense Baaya had filled his head with in the past where it belongs. He took refuge in science and literature, and when he was a little older, his mother sent him away to boarding school in the city. That was where he discovered he had a bit of a knack for solving crimes."

"He doesn't become a detective, does he?" Kuroba snorted, shifting to the side so that he was sitting facing Saguru. "I don't want to hear about a detective, Hakuba…unless he discovers that fairies really do exist. I liked the mystical theme better. And he needs a love interest. Maybe a fairy princess?"

"Fine. Fairies and a love interest. Got it." Saguru snorted lightly and continued. "Edward became a detective at young age, but, as you can imagine, it was hard for him to get others to take him seriously. After all, what law-enforcement professional would take a young teen seriously? The only thing for Edward to do was solve cases—big, important ones. He soon made a name for himself, but as he took on more and more cases, each one darker and more violent than the last, he began to feel burnt out. By the time he was seventeen, he'd lost a great deal of his faith in other people."

"Are we getting back to the fairies soon?" Kuroba pouted.

"Yes, Kuroba. In a sentence or two," Saguru groaned. "Then, one fateful day, Edward happened across a newspaper article telling of an uncatchable criminal running rings around the police force in his father's home country. The article told of the seemingly impossible feats the crook had done before, and Edward found himself captivated. Some of the things that criminal did sounded like magic—real magic that Edward had not dared to believe in for seven years. And so, Edward left for Japan to chase after this thief the world called a phantom.

"However, once he got there and met the thief himself, Edward was faced with the hard truth once more that fairies did not exist and that the Kaitou Kid was just one regular high school magician. Still, the thief proved to be Edward's mental match, and he quickly found himself developing a sort of fondness for his sworn adversary. Edward vowed to catch the thief and unmask him, and then, once he'd gotten a suitable explanation of why the thief's moonlighting activities were so important that he'd let himself be shot at, he planned to propose and take the thief to Tahiti for their honeymoon. The End."

Saguru went back to counting the broom bristles as Kuroba stared incredulously.

There was silence as Kuroba revisited the earlier parts of what he'd thought at the time was just a made-up tale. Realizations dawned upon the brunette that left him, for once, a little speechless.

It took him several minutes to filter everything, and once he'd finished, he had one question: "So…Edward likes Kid, right?"

"Edward loves Kid," Saguru corrected, losing count and starting over again.

"Oh." Kuroba gulped. "…And he thinks that his classmate is Kid, right?"

"He knows his classmate is Kid," Saguru revised.

"Well, I can tell you that Edward's wrong, but if he thinks the magician is Kid and if he's in love with Kid, does that mean that he's in love with his classmate too?" Kuroba asked meekly.

Saguru laughed. "Kuroba, Edward's classmate is an infuriating, childish brat. Edward has very little interest in that joker."

"But, if he thinks they're the same person…" Kuroba argued.

Saguru shrugged. "Yes, but Edward doesn't care much for the façade of a person his classmate pretends to be. He's fond of the gentleman thief persona that Kid puts on, but the man that he loves is the person that the thief and the magician are when they don't know that Edward's watching them."

Kuroba opened and closed his mouth a couple times. He drew his knees up to his chest and took a few deep breaths.

"How…how do you even know when you love someone? How do you know it's not just some crush? How…?"

"You just know." Saguru shrugged. "There are physical symptoms, to be sure, but generally, you just know when you find the person you want to bind your life to."

Kuroba gulped. "So…Edward's positive that he loves Kid?"

"He is."

Kuroba started to visibly fidget. "So…Edward isn't planning on catching Kid and then handing him over to the authorities so they can lock him up and throw away the key."

"No. Edward plans to catch Kid and then keep him all for himself," Saguru clarified.

Kuroba nodded slowly.

Saguru could tell from the foggy look in the magician's eyes that the other boy was lost in thought.

"Once…once upon a time, there was a magician—the best in the world. He had a son who adored him…wanted to be just like him, but the magician died when his son was still very young in what was determined to be an accident during one of his shows. When his son grew up, he learned that his father had been murdered, so he pretended to be his father, putting on shows once more under his father's name in order to draw out the men who had killed his dad. Along the way, he learned that his father had died trying to protect something of great importance from the people who had murdered him, and the son decided to go on protecting it in his father's place."

"What is it you have to protect from those trenchcoats with assault rifles, Kuroba?" Saguru hissed.

Kuroba shrugged, snorting noncommittally. "It's just a story, Hakuba. Not everyone pretends to make up a story but in the end it really ends up being about themselves."

"Kuroba, you're going to get yourself killed. Stop being such a fool," Saguru chided.

"This from the guy who's in love with a jewel thief," the thief himself scoffed. "Even if I were Kid, which I'm not, you've got no room to talk, Hakuba."

Saguru sighed, turning away from the man he loved in order to count the broom bristles again.

"Sorry," Kuroba whispered after three minutes and two point five seconds of silence. "You're not a fool, Hakuba."

Saguru took a deep breath, gathering all of his courage. "Yes, I am, because I know who you are, Kuroba, and still I love you—in and out of uniform."

Before he could change his mind, Saguru leaned forward, grabbing the magician by the jaw and kissing him most unceremoniously.

Kaito's brain froze for a moment as the detective's lips pressed desperately against his own.

Hakuba Saguru had obviously never kissed anyone before. That knowledge made the blonde sort of adorable, sort of pathetic in Kaito's eyes.

It was also evident that Hakuba truly meant what he had said about being in love with Kid…Kaito? But he didn't even know him. Not the real him anyway. Kaito was sure he'd never shown his true colors to his rival. Not intentionally, anyway. Though, Hakuba had mentioned that "Edward" loved the Kaito and the Kid that he was when he didn't know anyone was watching. Just what kind of dedicated stalker was the Brit anyhow?! Could it be possible that Hakuba knew more than Kaito had originally thought?

These thoughts flew through Kaito's mind in the blink of an eye as the thief in high shcooler's clothing was caught off-guard. His shock only lasted a split-second, though, and his fight or flight reflexes kicked in.

Kaito shoved the smitten detective away and jumped to his feet, retrieving his tools from his sleeve and getting the door open in fifteen seconds flat. He was beyond caring about incriminating circumstantial evidence at that point.

Saguru blinked. A lifetime's worth of courage wasted in forty-three point two seconds.

He sighed deeply, shutting the closet door once more and stretching out his legs now that he had the entire enclosure to himself.

Koizumi-san came in the morning, and she looked rather peeved to find the janitor's closet short one inhabitant. She frowned. "Where is he?"

Saguru shrugged, slowly getting to his feet. "Kuroba left some time ago. I do not know what you hoped to accomplish by entrapping us together in such a small space, Koizumi-san, but I'm sorry to have disappointed you."

"Didn't you tell him how you feel about him?" The witch snapped. "You were supposed to confess and then make out." Her tone expressed her unstated thoughts of "Can't you do anything right?!"

"Kuroba objected to the second part of your plan," Saguru snorted, pushing past her and making his way to class.

…...

Mikau: How was it? What did you think? I would appreciate some feedback, if you have a moment. It's been so long since I've written that I'm kind of worried that I'm a bit washed up. Thanks so much for taking the time to read! You all have a nice day!