Hellsing – Playtime (young Integra + Alucard)

Soundtrack: I didn't have one in mind this time, if you find a song that you think fits – post it in a review and I'll check it out. The best suggestion will get used and credited, :)

**AN: Insert standard disclaimer here – I own nada!

Please review! This was a crack-fic that popped into my head that was meant to be amusing and steamy at the same time – don't hate me. There is a companion piece for this that I'll include as a second chapter. If more related ideas come, I'll tack them on as well.

If there are spelling errors or weird numbered bits – I apologize. My new kitten has a terrible habit of stomping on my keyboard while I'm trying to make edits, :(

Playtime

He stopped, an unfamiliar expression of puzzlement on his face. "Master?"

"Shh," she whispered, not lifting her head. "I'm listening."

An ebony brow rose over the edge of the vampire's tinted glasses. "Listening to what?"

"I'm listening to the deshk," she grumbled as if it made perfect sense.

Alucard leaned his tall frame down to get a closer look at his waifish lady.

Integra was drunk.

From the looks of the empty whiskey bottle that had nearly rolled onto the floor, she was very drunk.

"I see you enjoyed Walter's Glenfiddich."

The girl scoffed. "He won't be back fer a week; there's time to buy him a new bottle."

"Oh, yes. The dignified sixteen year old Lady Hellsing would not garner any attention shopping in a—"

"Fine! You made your point," she slurred angrily. "And quit loomin' if you're going to shtay."

With a lopsided smirk, the vampire folded himself into the leather and wood chair across from the desk. Patience was the first thing he had learned over the centuries, but she didn't make him wait long.

A deep shuddering sigh rocked the girl's frame.

"I miss him."

It took a moment for Alucard to conclude which 'him' Integra was likely referring to. "Your father was an able man."

"Able," she repeated.

"Yes," the vampire kept his ruby gaze on the bowed blonde head. "He was a fierce fighter and considerable tactician."

Integra finally lifted her face from the desktop, eyeing him blearily. "Awfully compliment'ry on shomebody who locked you in a dungeon t' starve fer twenty years."

"Competent enemies are worthy of respect."

"Ssso, I should remind you of that if I chain you to a wall?"

Innocence made Integra miss the anticipatory lilt of the grin he flashed back at her.

The girl reached out unsteadily and dragged the empty liquor bottle closer. "Father used to keep a bottle of this in his deshk. Do you think Walter keeps one now for shentime'tal reasons?"

"I've never known the Angel of Death to be sentimental about anything."

Integra frowned, absently twirling the bottle with her slender fingers as her mind wandered.

The vampire's chuckle startled her from her thoughts.

"It seem that you have a reward to claim, my Master."

"What?"

Alucard simply pointed.

The bottle had stopped spinning to point at his chest.

It took a moment for Integra's inebriated mind to connect the dots and the vampire laughed again as she blushed to the roots of her hair.

"What—you—" she sputtered.

"I see you have heard of this game," the mirth was mingled with something darker. "Perhaps Walter has not been as vigilant as I had thought."

"How do you know what that means?"

The vampire's expression was wry. "I was a young lady for a time, if you recall. It seemed that all of the girls were doing it at some point or another. "

Integra's brain stalled once more before kicking forward again.

"I-I've not done—but I—I know things. I know what boys are after!"

"Do you?"

"Yesh! That son o' Lord Bolton, he's been giving me these creepy looks. It's like he wants to shee what my...well…" She huffed in irritation and discomfort. "Bast'rd tried to get me inna closet once."

Alucard's chair creaked audibly as claws sank into the wood. His voice was deceptively mild: "Did he now?"

"Dint work," she said, crossing her arms. "I elbowed him in the throat."

The vampire king's hearty laugh filled the office, rich and sinful as dark chocolate. "Excellent, my young Master!"

A small smile curled shyly at Integra's lip. "He couldn't talk fer an hour, so I was the only one wi' the whole shtory as t' why."

"My fearsome Lady," Alucard's crimson eyes gleamed as he swept off his hat with a flourish. "Your humble servant waits to grant you your reward."

"'Humble?'" she snorted indelicately, but gave him an appraising look.

The girl chewed at her lip with indecision, suddenly self-conscious and unsure. After an internal debate she couldn't seem to keep on a steady track, she finally nodded. Integra swayed as she stood from her chair and planted her fists on the desk to keep steady. "Come t' me then."

Alucard gracefully untangled himself from the lounge and placed his hands opposite hers. Though Integra was above average height for her age, the vampire still towered over her diminutive frame.

Irritation flared in her startling blue eyes, clearing the alcoholic haze for a moment. "You're too tall, kneel before me."

The demonic smirk ruined the picture of Alucard obediently lowering himself to his knees.

Integra gathered herself and lurched forward, nearly bruising her mouth against his in a clumsy kiss. The moment was brief, but even after she pulled back, Integra could feel the lingering chill of his lips.

Scarlet eyes blinked lazily, as if the vampire were considering something.

"Well, that was rather disappointing," he mumbled.

"What?" Integra stared incredulously, spots of pink on her cheeks.

"I mean, it is your first time right? I shouldn't expect you to be very good at kissing—"

Fury burned away the embarrassed flush and she reached for something to smash him with.

The bottle was spinning slowly again though she didn't remember seeing him touch it.

It settled to a stop, pointing directly at her.

"My turn."

Integra gasped in alarm as the vampire swept up through the desk and lifted her off her feet. His left arm wrapped around her back for support, crushing her tight to his chest.

Seconds seemed to stretch to forever. Integra knew she should protest; should order him to put her down, but her tongue was locked behind her teeth. Bare inches from hers, the ruby fire of his eyes seemed to immolate the whole world.

He held her entire weight as easily as if she were a glass of wine, but he made no further moves other than to look at her expectantly. Integra realized he was waiting for permission and she blushed once more. A barely perceptible nod was all he needed.

In for a penny...

His free hand caressed her cheek, the cool silk felt icy on her overheated skin. Slipping his fingers into her platinum hair, Alucard angled her head so he could brush his lips lightly along her jaw.

Integra couldn't breathe past the sensation that rocketed through her body. The secretive explorations she had done while buried under her blankets were nothing in comparison to the liquid heat kindled by his touch.

The devil's smile was knowing as he hovered over her for a lingering moment, drinking in the sight of her flushed cheeks and unfocused gaze.

Integra's eyes slid closed instinctively as Alucard sealed his mouth over hers.

She froze for several heartbeats, unsure of how to respond.

With the inexorable patience of a rising tide, the vampire gently coaxed her to open to him; deepening the kiss. He swallowed her squeak of surprise as his long tongue flicked inside her mouth to curl with her own.

He kissed her tenderly.

He kissed her thoroughly.

He kissed her like she was necessary for his survival.

Alucard wanted to brand the experience into her young mind so that any other who dared to get so close would have to stand in the vast trail he blazed.

Addled with alcohol as she was, Integra still caught on quickly. Her new found confidence grew from moment to moment, and soon she was exploring the contours of his face with her small hands.

The vampire king was aware that this little game had progressed much farther than he intended, but the way she was clinging to him was hard to resist. Unlike during the time of his mortal reign, Integra was still considered a child by modern standards. Taking her now would be a mistake on a number of levels, and Alucard wasn't reckless enough for that kind of risk.

But if she keeps wriggling like that…

Lines of heat mapped the paths her fingers had taken across his skin, sending tingles through the deadened nerves that hadn't felt anything in centuries. A purring rumble started in his chest as her hand reached up to fist in his hair. She gripped the unruly waves to a point just short of painful.

It was exquisite.

He never stopped the dance of his mouth on his young master's. Mixing with the clamor of her racing heart, Integra's breath came against his cheek in nasally whimpers.

Though his pool of self-control was nearly endless, Alucard's urge to exert it wasn't. The nearly musical sounds of his master's need were quickly eroding his interest in playing nice.

He leaned in harder, pinning her against the wall behind the desk. The feel of her body heat through their clothes was scorching and he wanted nothing more than to burn in its naked radiance.

Alucard felt a tremor tighten her limbs a heartbeat before Integra's eyes popped open in alarm.

He was already moving.

The vampire twisted and held Integra over the nearby trashcan as she was violently sick. A wry smile curled his lips as he dutifully held her hair back out of the way.

Saved by alcohol poisoning, he thought with an inaudible sigh.

He wasn't sure whether he was happy or angry about it.

Or who was saved.

AN: Drunk dialog is hard, I don't think I did that well with it. At one point it made her sound more Irish and I scrapped nearly the whole thing to start from zero.
In the original draft I left Integra's language straight, but I was worried it wouldn't reinforce the idea that she is acting much different than she would if she were sober.

This takes place only a few years after her father's death and Integra is still mourning. Despite our best efforts to keep a strong front, grief can get the better of us at times.

Having lost my own father, I could see this happening pretty clearly...