Before I start I need to say sorry. I got stressed with school. I also just was at a low. I am 22 and trying to pick my life up. and ereri was the first fandom I really dove into. Like reading and writing. And somethings we love we start to hate. But I shouldn't have dropped my fics. There were fics that made me laugh when I was crying. I hope you guys don't hate me. I kind of got told I'm not working till sales go up so um yeah. free time

...

Four years later

Levi

It has been four of the best and most challenging years of my life. But I was not prepared for this challenge. I need to back track.

When Hanji and I left we moved far away and changed our names. She pulled a few strings and wiped out our past. I had always been cautious enough to not get pictures of myself taken at these events. I wasn't stupid.

Ironically enough the guilt of having so many lives on my hands pushed me to school. Hanji and I went to school to become nurses. She decided to dedicate her life to a passion of hers. She never got the chance. Once I let myself feel, the guilt of the lives I destroyed nearly made me insane. I don't expect sympathy for the monster I was. I lied, stole, and terrorized any that disagreed with me. And I paid for it. I lost the only person I had ever loved. I refused to date anyone. And there were many offers. To take out all the aggression I had, I started boxing. It felt amazing getting all of the anger out of me. It also kept me in shape. I'm 36 and still attracting many.

Becoming a nurse wasn't easy. I was almost starting from scratch at 32 and science was not my cup of tea. But Hanji helped. She supported me. And I worked. Eren showed me that I could make an honest living. So I alternated between jobs with heavy lifting and school. Being a gang leader helped me with not ever slacking off. And it paid off. I was now working as a nurse and I even volunteered at the free clinic. I made it my mission to help out those in need. I felt this urge that for every soul I took, I helped save another. Hanji continued into research determined to do the same. She was going to study ways to help those with addictions.

And that's how we ended up here. We moved to the other side of the country where nobody even knew we existed. But Hanji had a conference and I had vacation time. So we ended up one state over from our hometown. But we knew nobody would recognize us. Or we thought. Imagine my surprise when I am walking in to check us in when the shift manager happened to be on duty.

"Eren."

Eren

My blood froze. My heart stopped. Fear etched inside me and I couldn't breathe. My employees looked at me with concern. I could make out people calling my name but I couldn't answer.

He found me

He found me

He's going to kill me.

But as I started blacking out I heard him shout "I'm a nurse and jumped over the counter."

Jesus help me.

An hour later.

I'm lying on something firm. There's a cool towel placed on my forehead. I groan and open my eyes slightly. Pale skin dark hair. My eyes shot open and I'm about to scream and run but he pulls me back and covers my mouth. And even when I thought I was an adult at 22 I feel like a baby about to cry for his mommy. I really don't want to die.

"You are still a brat."

The sentence catches me off guard. The fight leaves and I stare at him confused. I have no idea what to say. He looks just as confused.

"I thought you died. I thought I drove you to suicide." He whispered. I sit up and crawl away. Surprisingly he lets me go. I don't know why but something looks different about him. It looks off. I mean people change, but he looks like another person. It doesn't help that he starts to cry. And I think hell just froze over. Levi. Levi is sitting here at my job crying. I really don't know how to act. So I act accordingly.

"You're not here to drag me back? Or lock me up into a cage?"

The look he gives me could make anyone's heart break. I didn't know Levi was capable of this. My head hurts. And what's worse, my heart feels like it's going to come out of my chest and relax on the floor.

"No, I am no longer in that life." My jaw drops. In four years he really left?

"How did you find me? Why are you here?" I get upset. "I have lived in peace! Nobody is trying to attack me. I have friends, I have a life. People love me! Do you even know what love is Levi?" I practically spat his name. "And don't for a fucking second think that I will ever go back to you! You..." he interrupts.

"Eren, you were pronounced dead. I looked for your body or any trace of you. And it was my fault. It's all my fault. Eren I watched my parents get shot in my face. I looked men who took advantage of my pain in the eye. I saw the laughter. And I saw their souls leave their body as I killed them. I lived my half of my life without emotions because I knew how it felt. I brought others pain. I became the monster that killed my parents. I accepted that. But you were pure. You were not like anyone else I ever met. You worked hard without stepping on others. You made me laugh, you made me cry, and you made me feel again. And I will not fault you for what you did. Eren every day I see the eyes of those I have killed. And every night I am plagued by the betrayal in your eyes. I'm so sorry Eren."

I don't even realize I am crying till my vision is blurry. My heart hurts and my head is spinning. I'm trying to process everything he is telling me. And while I want to punch him in the face, I want to hug him. I no longer see the cold imp barking out commands. I now see a broken man. I now see someone trying to make life come to their eyes. And it makes me angry. He was a monster and deserves to be locked away. But I sat there like a diamond and watched him. I am just as guilty.

"Eren, do you hate me?" It had been ten solid minutes of two grown men crying. I looked him in the eye. I could tell he was really being honest. So I decided to be honest.

"No."

The answer makes his face go into shock. Then he smiles. He fucking smiles! It's a soft smile. Almost peaceful. He stands up and approaches me. I am too confused to move. He leans in and kisses me.

He's kissing me.

He's kissing me.

I can't breathe.

I don't want to breathe. It's the softest and slowest kiss he's ever given me. I feel too exhausted to fight back. Instead I relax into it and let him take me into his arms. The kiss deepens but there is no tongue. I feel like he's trying to say even more but I can't focus. We don't pull apart for air. We just breathe through our nose and press out lips closer together. I was terrified of this man the last time I saw him but now I feel this void closing inside me.

After just silently kissing he pulls back and looks at me. The smile is still there and my heart is beating fast. I think he broke something.

"Eren. I love you."