I don't even know if there's anyone left to read this it's been so long since I updated, I'm so sorry! I still miss Smash and always thought Karen and Ivy had great chemistry lol. Shame they had so little screen time together s2 :( To anyone still reading this, hope you enjoy!

"Karen, have you seen my keys anywhere?!" said Ana frantically. "I'm already late!"

"Seriously girl, if I had a dollar for every time you've asked me that!" Karen chuckled. "I'll be in later to let you in."

"Okay, I'll look properly when I'm back home. If you find them glue them to my door will you! See you later bestie. Have a good day."

"You too!" Karen couldn't help but smile once Ana had left. She sometimes wondered how Ana even managed to make it out the apartment such was her chaotic nature. She was disturbed from her thoughts by a knock at the door and grinned widely as she answered it.

"What have you forgotten now" Karen laughed as she opened the door, expecting to see Ana and totally unprepared for the person who actually stood before her.

"Ivy!" Karen exclaimed, unable to hide her shock. It had been 3 weeks since her encounter with Ivy and she'd been giving her space whilst she contemplated what to do. The last thing she expected was for Ivy to voluntarily come and see her.

"Hi Karen" said Ivy quietly, forcing a smile. "I'm, I'm sorry to surprise you like this. I know I should have called. Ana just let me through the front door. Ummm, is it okay to come in?"

"Sure" Karen stuttered. "Sorry, I, I thought were Ana. Come in."

She moved aside as Ivy tentatively let herself in, hovering by the table, unsure what to do, where to look.

"Here, l-let me take your coat" said Karen, shutting the door and rushing over to Ivy. "Will you sit down?" she added, as she helped Ivy off with her coat. Their eyes locked and Karen gave her a reassuring smile, as Ivy made her way to the sofa, slowly sitting down.

"Can I get you a drink? Water, tea ... something stronger?!" Karen smiled, trying to put Ivy at ease with a joke.

"No, I'm fine thanks" laughed Ivy. "Booze and me are taking a break for a bit!" Ivy looked up at Karen and to her surprise she could see she looked as nervous as she was feeling. "I'm not going to bite you know. You can sit next to me too if you dare."

Karen couldn't help but smile. The last time she'd seen Ivy she barely recognised her, such was the change in her - both physically and mentally. But already she seemed more like her old self.

"I guess I'll take my chances then" said Karen, smiling as she sat down next to Ivy. "It's good to see you" she said quietly.

"You too" replied Ivy, her voice beginning to break. Her eyes met Karen's and she instinctively reached out to grab her hand. "You look really well" she added. "I was so proud of you winning the Tony."

"Yeah well" said Karen. "You kinda gave me a free run of it! ... Ivy, I'm so glad you're here. I'm, I'm sorry for causing trouble at your mom's, and for how things were left, but I want you to know, I didn't give up on you. I just ... I just wanted to give you the space you needed to work things out. And the space I needed to do the same."

"It's okay. I know" replied Ivy. "It's me who needs to be apologising, explaining ... not you."

"Ivy ..."

"Please Karen, don't say it" interrupted Ivy. "Please don't say I have nothing to apologise for, because I do. I, I need to be honest with you Karen. I want to be."

"That's all I've ever wanted" Karen implored.

"I'm a mess Iowa, I always have been. Even after Bombshell's opening night I was ready to press the self destructive button. I didn't know how to handle happiness, and then you, we, everything for a while seemed so perfect. I was just ready for it all to fall apart, and maybe deep down I wanted it to. Because all my life I've dealt with disappointment, and anything else, well it terrified me. So the smallest thing got me doubting us, you. By the time I went to Sebastian's, in my mind all I wanted to do was hurt you, the way that I had let myself believe that you had hurt me. I don't think I've ever felt so reckless as I did that night, and Sebastian, well he doesn't need much encouragement!"

Her voice was beginning to shake and Karen squeezed her hand reassuringly. "Ivy if this is too much ..."

"No, no, it's fine." Ivy shook her head. "I need to tell you this. I, it was me who initiated things, with him. I don't know, it was like I wasn't part of myself anymore. Like I was outside my body staring at this other Ivy that I'd let myself become. I wanted to hurt you for hurting me, even though deep down I think I knew you never would, but most of all I think I wanted to hurt myself. And then, when, when he was on top of me, he mentioned your name and, and in that moment I realised I was making another huge mistake ... and I tried to stop him Karen, I swear I did, but he wouldn't stop. He wouldn't stop, and, and I could hear you ringing me but he would let me go, and he, he raped me."

She was sobbing now as Karen pulled Ivy into her arms. "Ssshhh, it's okay. I'm here. I'm not going anywhere."

They stayed like that for a long while, until Ivy had calmed down and quietened. Karen rang her hands through Ivy's hair and laughed as she began to wipe away the mascara from Ivy's face. "This is not a good look! Ivy, will you look at me?" she said as Ivy stared back at her with teary eyes. "For better or worse Ivy, I do still love you, and I want to be the person to help you through this. But it's only going to work if you let me in. Not just now, but I mean always. Because I do know you Ivy. You're not an easy person, you know that right?!" she laughed. "But if I wanted easy I'd probably still be with Dev!"

"I know that" Ivy laughed. "I'm just scared. I don't know where to even start to make this right."

"First of all you need to forgive yourself Ivy, and accept that what happened to you wasn't your fault. Stop punishing yourself. There's only one person that needs to be punished here ... and nothing should ever be so bad that you, that you'd want to do this to yourself" said Karen as she gently took Ivy's wrists and rubbed her thumbs over her scars.

"I'm so sorry Karen" Ivy whispered as the tears started to flow again.

"What did I tell you. There's nothing to be sorry for. That's all in the past, okay?" Karen replied as she wiped the tears from Ivy's cheeks. "So ... what do we do next? Do you want me to take you back to your mom's. Is that where you want to be? Or do you want to stay here in New York ... with me if you want? I don't want you to do anything you're not comfortable with."

"I'm most comfortable when I'm with you" said Ivy. "But I can't promise I'm going to be much fun for a while. Also, my place is a mess!" laughed Ivy.

"Well lucky for you" said Karen. I cleaned it all up for you, you know, in case you wanted to move back in anytime. Took me a whole day just to get rid of the empty vodka bottles" she winked.

"You're too good to be true Iowa" smiled Ivy. "You know, mom and I, the day you came over, we talked things through, and for the first time in a long time she was honest with me. I know in her own way that she does love me, and part of her was trying to protect me. It's going to take some time but I think we might be okay. And, Karen, I know that it was you who found me that night. Not mom, like she said. And I know how you tried to see me at the hospital. Thank you ... for saving me.

"I don't know what I'd have done if I'd lost you" said Karen, her voice breaking.

"You didn't" whispered Ivy, as she leaned in and rested her forehead on Karen's, cupping her face with her hand. "I love you Karen Cartwright. Thank you for giving me another chance. I know I don't deserve it but I'm not going to mess this up, I promise you." It was Ivy who initiated the kiss. She'd missed Karen's touch, her taste, more than she could ever have imagined. And right then in that moment, she didn't feel fear, hurt, anger ... she just felt safe.