A/N: In which Russia discovers America's fandom and OTP...

I might continue this with other pairings if people want ^_^

Disclaimer: Hetalia and The Avengers – nope!

"NO!" America screamed, jumping up from behind his laptop and clutching his hair in desperation. His blue eyes were frantic as he kept reading whatever it was that he was reading online.

Russia banged his head against the bookshelf in shock and dropped the book he had just recently grabbed. Wincing, he bent down to pick up his lost item before asking worriedly, "What is it, Amerika?"

The superpower stared blankly at the computer screen as he slowly sank back down to the couch. "Oh god…" he breathed, tears welling up in his eyes.

"What's wrong?"

"Oh god oh god oh god…"

"Sunflower?"

The American gave a strangled cry, seriously worrying the Russian. Never had his beloved sunflower been like this. Not during the Revolutionary War; not during the Cold War; not even during 9/11. So what was causing America such pain?

Whatever it was, Russia would be sure to rip it apart.

Walking up to his stunned boyfriend, the scarf-wearing nation set his book on the coffee table before gently taking the laptop away. Much to his surprise, his boyfriend let him and simply watched with a trembling lip as Russia read what was on the screen:

There was blood everywhere. Blood on the walls, blood on the furniture, blood on the ground. And in the middle of it lay a figure, coughing. It was clear that the hits hadn't killed him. Yet. But eventually, out of the sheer amount of blood loss, it would. Nothing could help him now, not even love. And the Iron Suit could be forgotten – that did nothing against what they'd used.

So the god approached the mortal. He approached the mortal that he'd given a second chance. The mortal he fell in love with. He kneeled down so that he could help the wounded man better and began getting out some gauze to wrap the wound.

"Don't…" Tony gasped out, clutching his bleeding side. "It'll only make it worse…"

Loki smiled weakly at his lover. "But you're bleeding to death!"

Russia made a face and looked back and forth from the laptop screen to America for a few moments. Finally, he asked, "Amerika…what is this?"

"That," America replied shakily, "is the saddest fan fiction I have ever read. My feels, man! I just wanted to read some Ironfrost – 'cause they're my OTP, ya know? - and now my feels are broken!"

"Uh huh…and what exactly is 'Ironfrost', 'OTP', and 'fan fiction'?"

Suddenly America snapped to attention, his blue eyes growing large. "You don't know what either of them is?!"

"Nyet," Russia answered, shaking his head.

The American jumped up quickly and snatched his laptop away. "Dude, you're missing out!" he exclaimed. Then he started to give this giant lecture explaining in a very detailed manner just what both of them were, leaving the Russian highly confused. After he was done, he asked, "Get it now?"

"Um," Russia mused, looking at the ceiling in order to comprehend what the heck his boyfriend just said. After a few seconds of failure, he gave up and said, "No."

America let out a wail of frustration, slapping him on the shoulder, before collapsing back onto the couch to read some more. Russia could tell he was annoyed. His face was pinched and he had his arms crossed. But in all honesty, the former superpower couldn't see what all the fuss was. It was just a story.

He made the mistake of voicing that confusion.

America went berserk, claiming that he had already explained why it was a big deal and that Russia's "communist ears should've listened more" and that "now Tony'll die and Loki will be brokenhearted and I can't even…!" and "if you had a heart, you'd be crying too!". It amused the Russian to see the American in such a state – face blushing madly from anger and eyes wild with passion – that he gave a little chuckle.

Big mistake. Big, big, big mistake.

Blue eyes narrowed dangerously and the ranting stopped. If looks could kill, the violet-eyed nation would be six feet under in a casket. But they didn't, and all America hissed was, "You're sleeping on the couch tonight, ruskie."

Then he stood up, walked to the bedroom, and slammed the door.

And Russia, who had stopped laughing and watched his very upset boyfriend leave, learned an important lesson:

Never ever insult or laugh at America's fandom. Whatever it was.