Author has written 9 stories for Harry Potter, RWBY, My Hero Academia/僕のヒーローアカデミア, Rising of the Shield Hero/盾の勇者の成り上がり, Sword Art Online/ソードアート・オンライン, High School DxD/ハイスクールD×D, and KonoSuba: God's Blessing on This Wonderful World. I write stuff for fun. Made my own community for those who write Jaune Arc as a girl, and you may request that your story be added. 20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity 1. At Lunch Time , Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point a Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down. 2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice. 3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, ask If They Want Fries with that. 4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label it " In". 5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks Once Everyone has Gotten Over Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch to Espresso. 6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks , Write "For Smuggling Diamonds". 7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy". 8. Don't use any punctuation. 9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk. 10. Order a Diet Water when ever you go out to eat, with a serious face. 11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go". 12. Sing Along At The Opera. 13. Go To A Poetry Recital. And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme? 14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area and Play tropical Sounds All Day. 15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party Because You're Not In the Mood. 16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom. 17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won! I Won!" 18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run For Your Lives! They're Loose!" 19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner, "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To Have To Let One Of You Go." 20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity . Send This E-mail To Someone To Make Them Smile! Its Called ... therapy! Friends or Best friends FRIENDS: never ask anything to eat or drink BEST FRIENDS: Help themselves and is the reason you never have any food FREINDS: Call your parents Mr. Mrs. and grandma and grandpa BEST FRIENDS: Call your parents MOM and DAD GRAMS AND GRAMPS FRIENDS: Would bail you out of jail at 2 A.M BEST FRIENDS: Would be sitting next to you saying "DAMN we really messed up!" FRIENDS: Would leave you if you were a criminal. BEST FRIENDS: Are the ones you call in the middle of the night to tell them you killed someone and they would say "SHIT, what we gonna do with the body??" FRIENDS: Would help you up if you fell BEST FRIENDS: Would laugh at you and trip you again FRIENDS: Never seen you cry BEST FRIENDS: Won’t tell anyone else you cry... just laugh about it when you’re not down anymore FRIENDS: Ask you to write down you number BEST FRIENDS: Has you on speed dial FRIENDS: Borrows your stuff and gives it back a few days later BEST FRIENDS: Loses your stuff and tells you, "My bad ... Here’s a tissue" FRIENDS: Look at you in disapproval when you do something really stupid. BEST FRIENDS: Will be at your side doing something stupid with you. FRIENDS: Only know a few things about you BEST FRIENDS: Could write a very embarrassing biography about your life FREINDS: Will leave you behind if that’s what everyone else is doing BEST FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowd asses that left you FRIENDS: Would knock on your front door BEST FRIENDS: Would walk right in and say ,"IM HOME what we having for dinner?" FRIENDS: Say sorry when you want to talk to them at odd hours of the night, or even just hang out at odd hours. BEST FRIENDS: Come right over and hang out with you, until you either fall asleep, or kick them out. FRIENDS: You have to tell them not to tell BEST FRIENDS: Already know not to tell FRIENDS: Are through high school /college (drinking buddies) BEST FRIENDS: Are for life FRIENDS: ask you why you're crying BEST FRIENDS: already have a shovel ready to bury the loser that made you cry FRIENDS: Will talk shit to the person who talks shit about you. BEST FRIENDS: Will knock the shit out of them! FRIENDS: would say "He wasn't good enough for you" BEST FRIENDS: would walk up to the person who broke your heart and yell at the top of there lungs "IT'S BECAUSE YOUR GAY ITSN'T IT!!" FRIENDS: Will be there to take your drink away when they think you’ve had enough BEST FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say, “drink the rest of that, you know we don’t waste” FREINDS: Will ignore this BEST FRIENDS: Will repost this shit. OBITUARY FOR THE LATE MR. COMMON SENSE (Found on BlackSaint's Profile) Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; and Maybe it was my fault. Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (don't spend more than you can earn) and reliable strategies (adults, not children, are in charge). His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned but overbearing regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6 year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition. Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when schools were required to get Parental consent to administer Calpol, sun lotion or a band-aid to a student; but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion. Common Sense lost the will to live as the Ten Commandments became contraband; churches became businesses; and criminals received better treatment than their victims. Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault. Common Sense finally gave up the will to live, after a woman was severely burned by a McDonald's coffee and McDonald's told her to get bent when she asked for her medical bills to be paid by them. Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by his 3 stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else Is To Blame, and I'm A Victim. Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing. |