I haven't been so amused in a long time whilst reading fanfic :D

This was a funny lighthearted read :) Very very very OOC though

Super fun to read! Also the writing is really good, so impossible to put it down. Great job

Not what I expected, but I enjoyed it!

I know it's hard to remember that there was a time before Google. But there was. And the Harry Potter books take place before Google existed. Everything except the epilogue in Deathly Hallows, and provided you don't count Cursed Child.
Battle of Hogwarts: 2 May 1998
Google founded: 4 September 1998

They wouldn't have been ordering airline tickets or making hotel reservations online. They might have looked up a phone number, but you have to remember we had **dial-up** back then. It's far more likely they would have dialed whatever the equivalent of the US' 411 service (information) is in Paris - or was at that time. Even more likely that they would have driven back into town and, if they didn't pass by a travel agent's storefront, checked the bulletin board located in the grocer's for community messages and advertisements. Of course, it's also entirely possible that her parents would have had a physical phone directory lying around the cottage somewhere. Those existed then as something more than the thing shoved under the rickety table leg to balance it out, or in-a-pinch doorstops.

And we also had to pay for Internet by the minute. There was a reason that all those offers of "500 free hours" that came with a CD ROM were so popular at the turn of the century; why people had e-mail through their ISP instead of through the free services (like gmail now). I used to have a netscape account - that's how old I am.

This is one of those detail-oriented areas which will throw readers completely out of the area of suspension of disbelief, whether the story's marked as a parody or not. Something to think about for your future stories, should you choose to mix the Muggle in with the magical.

Fantastic story, light hearted, adorable and hilarious!

usually i skip over the author's notes at the beginnings of stories but i think i screamed reading this one -roast beef curtains that's such a wretched phrase oh my god . i know you wrote this for a laugh, but some of the things you put in here are just such wonderful ideas that i'm a little surprised i've never seen them anywhere else. your bit about how the signature of a crucio is as distinct as a fingerprint is an absolutely genius thought and i'm such a sucker for it because i love those little magical theory bits like that's so interesting and you sneaked it in there beautifully.

also, i think my heart fell out of my body with the force of my gag at that last line, "He smiled against her lips, 'If I am without a heart, it is because I gave it to you.'" that's so sweet, disgustingly romantic, you're trying to kill me there's no other explanation

i cannot believe i forgot about that fanfic bit oh my god i'm in awe you really do just keep knocking me into a different dimension with how many things you managed to shove into this

SNAPE SNAPE SEVERUS SNAPE god i love him and i love you and how you tied amortentia with destiny that was very clever of you

i can't believe you banged a masterpiece out like this in two days you're such a gem oh my god my favorite bits are the hostile dinner times they're just so fun to read all of this is a gift thank you

imagine looking the foulest dark wizard of you time in the face and having the NERVE to tell him he could do with some sun istg your hermione is such a delight every time i read this is can't stop smiling

this will never not be a joy to read oh my fucking god you're a gift to man "what happened to 'if i profane with my unworthiest hand this holy shrine'?" jeez the sass in that im dead holy shit

I LOVE THIS SO MUCH!

Love it! wish it was longer, the character development was brilliant.

this ended too soon!