I enjoyed this story so much !

well done.

Okay, I hope you don't mind a little bit of a critique?

But first off I will start off by saying that I really loved this plot. It had a good story and I really liked that you stuck to what happened in cannon but still ventured off as need be. Some of the events you brought up obviously happened a lot quicker here than in cannon but considering the circumstances for the most part they all made sense. Well done. Next I would like to appraise your writing. Though there are some things I'd say need improvement overall you continued to draw me into he story and had me wish I could keep reading without stopping even though real life is a thing.

Okay on to the critique. The first thing I would mention is how ooc the characters ended up becoming by the end of the story. You were pretty good about holding fast to their characters at the beginning but I saw one comment mention thag after ch 5 was the venturing point of this no longer being the case and although I didn't notice it at the time looking back I do agree with this. By the end of the story, I knew the characters personalities, but it really just didn't feel like Rey and kylo at that point, just two characters in their scinerios.

I'm not sure if you had a beta to help you out with this story but for this issue I'd highly advise getting one for future stories. They will really help you out with pointing out a scene you made or an action you had a character do that was just really ooc.

That the was the main thing, although there were two smaller things I noticed a lot of in this story that I think would really improve your writing skills if you were able to correct this. For one, you kinda talked about showers a LOT. While mentioning them taking a shower a few times is perfectly acceptable, I think after a while people just assume they're taking a shower every day, I don't think you need to actually mention it every time they do. This is because after a whole especially if you delve into the scene of shower taking as many time as you did it just gets more and more repetitive and boring, really just draws your ready from the story. I think it would help if you narrowed down the amount of times you mentioned the characters taking a shower, only bringing it up to relax the reader after an intense scene, grow a relationship between two characters or introduce skemthing new to the audience. Like, you only mentioned the characters going to the bathroom like once but every other day when you didn't mention it, as an audience we still assume the characters have relieved themselves. Same situation with showering.

Lastly, this one isn't too huge but I wanted to mention that there were several times when it really felt like you were rushing a scene. I noticed it before their first kiss but it didn't bother me until I got to that scene. It's a huge momentous moment for the characters. But after they kissed they just kinda ended up in reys room and Kyle was saying goodnight. It felt so very rushed and as a reader I didn't feel like I got to delve into the characters heads as it was going on. Did Rey realize why kylo was bringing her to her room or was she oblivious? Was kylo really fucking horny? Because it kinda seemed like he was but we didn't get any indication on if that was true or not.

Again it's not too huge of an issue but it did kinda pull me away from the story a few times when something like that came up and I figured I'd mention it.

So again, overall this was a really great read. Just a few things that I'd suggest looking into for any future stories you decide to write. I saw you have another story up so maybe I'll look into reading through that one next. And with that good luck as you continue.

Oh and feel free to pm me if you have any questions or concerns, I'd be happy to help explain what I mean differently if any of it didn't make sense.

She actually is so you are right about that :)

Awesome!

Ok I was hooked up until about chapter 5...i think. Ray is becoming too much of a damsel in distress. ... I'm still gana keep reading

Cute

OMG OMG...this is so good. I liked the movie but hated the ending(ben death and ray left so lonely). It's like a retailing of the movies. Definitely a fan!

Bardzo ciekawa historia. Czytało się z przyjemnością.

Is the baby a boy or girl

More!

This story is amazing! I definitely want an epilogue about their life on Naboo!

Yeah! Luke is back and Reylo is getting married!

Damn. Han still has to died.

LOVE this story! Can't wait too see the next chapter!