I really hope that you come back to continue this story.
It has so much potential, and the Dark Elves angle is one that I hadn’t read before.

Very keen to see how the rest of this story unfolds.
Great work.

Good story keep it up,so update soon please!

This story has a lot of promise! Please keep it up!

Great story hope to see more very soon.

please update soon

Just love story so far, Can't wait for the next update

If they are such great friends, why did Fleur not send him birthday wishes? Also, how did they meet up so often when Fleur most likely would have been in France and then just a year later in school?

Just found this and binge-read it! I'm a sucker for Harry/Fleur stories, LOL.

Ugh. Not sure I can continue reading this, which is a shame because there are so few Harry/Fleur fics, and the number of good ones can be counted on one hand.

The first major thing that stands out is the ridiculous number of letters in this chapter. I strongly encourage you to only include letters when they are of actual important, and have harry give a short summary of what the other letter contain.

I also encourage you to remove the entire Draco/Ginny plot, especially the part about soul-mates. I can never understand pairing two characters who are at extreme opposites of a spectrum together. I actually really enjoy stories which redeem Draco, but to redeem him you have to have him be an evil little git first. It's character development. Draco and Ginny do not go together. At all. They should have absolutely nothing in common, and this first chapter where you have essentially introduced them as soul-mates and done at complete 180 on both of their characters is so OOC that it really detracts from the rest of the story.

The next major thing that I strongly encourage you to change is what you are doing to Dumbledore's character. There are already 500,000 Manipulative!Dumbledore stories, and none of them are good. Taking a good but flawed character and reducing him to some chestmaster destroys the character entirely. It's taking a complex character that tries to do good but has flaws and must go through their own sort of redemption and it flattens them until they aren't even worth being mentioned anymore.

That's also basically what you're doing to Draco in this story. Draco's character changed in canon. There were several stages to his character in canon, and now you appear to be trying to take away or explain away all of the qualities that lead to his redemption in the first place. You are flattening him as character.

As for Ginny - It's simply OOC as hell. She has her own character development in canon, and now you appear to be destroying that for her as well. She shouldn't be at the stage where she can be writing letters to Harry, much less admitting her crush to him.

...

I'm not trying to be a dick, or discourage you from writing. I encourage you to continue, but please, the things that I have pointed out above are really detracting from the story and I've only read the first chapter. These things have been done to death, and I've never seen a story turn out better for it.

I have no issue with a Draco redemption sub-plot, but please reconsider pairing Draco and Ginny up. He can be paired up for someone who he actually knows and we'll get a new character to explore at the same time.

The last complaint is about the Goblins. It's so tiring seeing the Goblins involved with everything - it also seems a bit far-fetched that they would warn Harry about Dumbledore in a letter. Bank communications are supposed to be formal, and that certainly isn't. I would re-write the letter to give it a more formal tone and a formal request that he does not share the meeting request or communication with anyone else.

You need character development for a story to be even mildly interesting, and that seems to be your main flaw here - You are taking Draco, Dumbledore, and Ginny and changing who they are entirely. Harry already has enough villains in his life, but can't you replace Manipulative!Dumbledore with a brand new character operating from the shadows, not connected to Voldemort, that has his own motivations? Really think about this. How can you introduce a new character to this that serves the same purpose as a Manipulative!Dumbledore, but has their own motivations and backstory.

Take some time to plot out a new story - and ask yourself this question: "How can I create an original plot-line and avoid the common tropes or turn them on their head?".

This is getting interesting.

Interesting so far. I like that Fleur is an old friend of Harry's, it's something I haven't encountered before. But you have to work on your dialogue. Nobody talks the way Harry does, and people don't just deliver what are essentially massive monologues. It makes those passages seem stilted and they're very hard to read. Just because you have him pronouncing every word separately and using the occasional "big word" doesn't make his speech more refined. And no fourteen year, old no matter how cultured, would talk like that. I generally enjoyed most of your story, but this chapter was slightly off-putting. Perhaps paying closer attention to conversations around you will help. It has certainly helped and is helping me still when I write dialogue. Hope you'll update soon.

IT was interesting until you made Harry a advocate against muggleborns like it was nothing. He should not be that attached to the wizard world as to change his stance antimuggle. And let's be honest, does he really have no attachments to technology? does he really suddenly agree with the purebloods? He is essentially a muggleborn no matter the ancestry. Please do add in the summary that this a pureblood!Harry so people that dislike this kind of thing can avoid it. Thank you.

Good first chapter (again) and great that Harry is putting forth more effort in his studies. I would like to point out that the use of "the dark lord" in reference to Voldemort seemed to only be used by DEs and Voldy supporters. Thanks for sharing!

Lol you need a rewrite, you are leaving out details and then expecting us to follow.

Outstanding story