I like the way that you outline the other side of the events on Terra from Mikoto's perspective, the perspective of someone who wants Garland to succeed because she can't see any other way for things to proceed, not having the knowledge of Gaia and its people that Zidane possesses.

Poor Mikoto, feeling as though Zidane has pitted himself against her. I like the way you show her registering this conflict and the way she is forced to ally herself solely with Garland since Zidane doesn't know her and seems to have abandoned her and the genomes.

I love Mikoto's desperate fight with Kuja. It's obvious that she will lose, poor thing.

I love the way you describe Mikoto's introduction to the Black Mages and the talk she has with Vivi. I enjoy his simple explanations of things and the way he is so compassionate towards Mikoto.

I enjoy the way that Mikoto becomes so active in the development of her fellow genomes and the way she takes an interest in their education. I like that she retains her calm and emotionless way of talking even though she begins to feel emotions again.

I really enjoy the genomes' reception of Beatrix and the way she is so surprised to see so many Zidane duplicates running about. Your explanation for Mikoto's presence on the air ship and her subsequent instructions to Cid makes perfect sense, as do so many parts of your retelling of the story from Mikoto's perspective.

I also really enjoy Mikoto's tearful reunion with Zidane. I think you did a wonderful job of writing her character and it was a pleasure to read this story from start to finish.

Nitpicking:

"Garland has secured the Invincible." Replace "has" with "had."

"It was so different to Bran Baal." Replace "to" with "from."

"The Genomes were already wandering around, Learning new things." Replace "Learning" with "learning."

"I had thought I had learned all there was to learn, but the black mages showed me different." Replace "different" with "differently" or maybe with "that I was wrong."

"I realised that, if my lifespan were only a maximum two years, I would want to get the most out of it." Omit the first comma.

I love the way that you begin the story with Mikoto's beginning and her very first impressions. They are suitably vague so as to imitate someone who is very unfamiliar with the world. I really enjoy the way in which the genomes think of themselves collectively and the way she associates her beginnings with pain. Her reflections about Kuja are very interesting as well. I like the way the other genomes ostracize Kuja for his difference, apparently although they are very different from human beings they are also strikingly similar.

I love the sonversation between Zidane and Mikoto, the way he is frustrated first with her questions and then with her repetitions. I love the way Zidane grows attached to Mikoto and she is so puzzled about it.

The voice for Mikoto is so perfect and wonderful. I love the way she puzzles over the fact that being named doesn't make her feel any differently and I adore the reason why Zidane chooses to name her.

Your description of what it is like to suddenly receive a soul is wonderful.

I was wondering how you would deal with the fact that Mikoto seems emotionless when Zidane meets up with her again. I like the way you have handled this. The idea of Mikoto accompanying Garland when he destroys parts of Gaia is quite frightening.

Nitpicking:

And I am really reaching here, but "pursue" gives me an idea of chasing, I would change it here: "It was in my nature to pursue the crowd." To something like "emulate" "mimic" "mirror" or "copy."

Again, I am being very picky: "Garland said it was important for pain-endurance Lessons." I would also capitalize "Pain-Endurance." Either that or omit capitals from "Lessons."

"I did notice that he flitted over the reason why and how he and First were different to us." I would write "different than us."

Great story i love mikoto and you do also. Work on your other Fics and update please your tallent is increadable. I also luv read mages *hint hint Coughupdatecough* great fic

*sniff* This is beautiful! I am a HUGE Mikoto fan, of course. You have such a gift, I'm putting you on my favorites!

this is a exclent story! i almost cried. you did a good job at looking into people.

hi!i like your story!can you make another zidane & mikoto fic!pls!

hi!i like this story! can you make another fic of zidane & mikoto!pls!

WOW! This was really good! very much in the same style of a Mikoto piece that I just finished writing- she's such an interesting character, ddoncha think XD

This really captured her well, and I love it!

x

Deathy

I loved your fan-fic! Especially the part about Mikoto and Zidane, and how Zidane named her. It was so sweet!

I loved the way you wrote the fan-fic. So...lovely, that's the only word I can say. Hey, how about writing a fan-fic called "The Second", eh? _

LOVED IT! Heh, you could say I like Mikoto too. She rocks! Anyways, great fic! I abosultly loved it! :)

oo...-is speechless-...

GoldGuilmon(my muse): What he's trying to say but can't, is that this is an excellent view of the under-appreciated 'Third Angel'. We commend you on an excellent job LunarCry! You better continue writing, those skills of yours are unbelievable! Keep up the great work!