BIG HUGE SPOILER RIGHT HERE DINT READ

SHE FOUGHT THE FUCKING GOD OF DARKNESS HOLY SHIT

"In theory, I should be able to create them, Now I just need to create the things I need to create more of the things I need to create the things I want to create!"

-Lilly

I have found my kindred soul at last. Someone that has the unsatiable desire to create new untold wonders to better the world. Someone that truly values how learning lets you get to such a point.

And she has a rocking bod too, bonus there.

And yet, and yet, she is trapped within the words on a page. She cannot even be a 2D wiafu for me. Ohh why did she have to be a set of words on a page.

Damn I don't even think Sci-fi has made a device that can turn written descriptions of a character into a person yet. must I turn to magic for such things? or shall I follow my path of science and push it beyond. Yes Lilly, I shall make you into a 3D flesh and blood waman.

Oh really good chapter too.

Ugh it's so emotional draining ea h chapter we see our badass red head dealing with her lack of memories! But I love it. Why must you do this to me!

So this chatper was pretty good. I was honestly a little ticked at how care free Lilly was being during the meeting you started with but that was explained away i the next scene. The best parts of that scene was lilly freaking out james and winter with her eyes of god. And the threat of coffee removal for for lilly and ozpin.

Next scene with lilly and karen in the room with bardy and discussing their worries. It was a pretty good scene. I don't get what the big deal is with karen being 22 though. I got a feeling it has something to do with how time flows differently between the two worlds but for the life of my I cannot recal how old Karen was when and if she was ever mentioned by tiella or the others in an earlier chapter.

Also when you started going into conspiracy theories it just seemed like it was trying to hard. Someone wants to wage a war with super powered soldiers. but you got the 4 strongest ever super powered people acting as a rouge unit. How do you keep other nations from buying their help? you simply send them to another world! The whole thing about gathering them there for some kind of epic battle between the 4 of them or some kind of incubation for the 4 of them just felt a little to forced. and that being forced also mad the lilly getting stumped seemed like a no brainier. But if we do go by that theory then I believe that Bardy is a lower class god, like Hercules that was meant to protect an higher power goddess like athina that resides in Lilly. this is based on what possessed lilly had said to bardy. going the other way I think karen is the support or minion for tiele's demon. we saw how the possession had literally eaten away at tiella's body, if this was bound to happen even from that demon's perfect vessel then having an immortal minion that's capable of restoring the head demons vessel would be most ideal.

the final scene with bardy and lilly was the best. really love how bardy verbally slapped the sense back into Lilly and really i love his simple but also bleak perspective on life. that perspective that. you just gotta fight a never ending fight to get through life itself is a great one. Also TOTALLY TOTALLY LOVE the Bardy and lilly pairing. Also love how bardy's just "NOPE." He knows what he wants. that just to carry his friends through the battle of life. with this chapter alone I think it made bardy me favorite character of this series.

AHHH Sooooooo good to get back to reading this story. Soo good I was able to come back to a nice fluffy chapter too.

So the start was basic set up parameters. In fact i feel this chapter could have been the start to a whole other book entirely. the easy set up to get a grasp of the location as well as starting the interactions of tiella with Karen was a good way to pull in the concept of the situation and drop the names of other characters we're about to be introduced too.

the but with Tielle and Zie was rather interesting and if a first time reader started with this chapter it would be a great way to show the other sides of tiella without it being forced as well as how her potty mouth is a consistent thing.

using this as a Segway into the uncomfortable breakfast scene where we are briefly introduced to the rest of the leading cast and are shown how they are trying to help her and how they are tryin to be "old time friendly" with tiella.

the next scene with the mistery meeting started down right hysterical and just childish. it broke the reader out of that uncomfortable feeling left over by the last scene. but it soon delved into some pretty heavy concepts about distrust, and mental trauma in a why that felt natural and understandable for the target audience. which I feel in this case are mainly young adults and late teens many of which wont really understand or have not experienced such detrimental things to their spychie.

This scene also served as an overview and extension of understanding the way team RWBY acted during the breakfast scene and serving as a more in depth introduction to each character and their personality. I like how, for those that know the show, it was Blake and Wiess that provided the must in depth analysis to Tielle's mental state. it works well with their characters and what they have been through in the cannon as well. Having Yang and Ruby be the voices of emotion and consciousness respectively also fit in line with their cannon versions too. But for those that have not seen the show, this scene played a key roll in rapidly yet smoothly showcase their character and personality.

next big scene with tielle on the phone with glynda. it was a really good scene and well written. It showed there definitely was something between these two woman and with the refrances to past events nothing more had to be said to validate this ship to new readers than that. it was sweet and the uneasiness that was in tielle until the conversation really got flowing is probably relatable to a lot of people. that made it feel quite genuine and real.

changing the perspective to Lilly for the final scene was also really good too. it really changed things up and pulled the reader back in. the brief over view of bardle's injuries was all that was needed to get a gauge of how epic of a fight he must have went through. the call between Lily and tielle did feel a little forced even at it's end. though I feel that's what it should be given Tiella's condition.

the only complaint i have is that the ending felt just a little to rushed. Ending on the note of Lily having a bitter sweet moment would have worked perfectly. but adding that last two paragraph/lines made me feel as if things were rushed almost like a movie set to play at 10 times the normal speed. it just seemed to be a rambled jumble of moments not unlike the rapid jumbled words of tielle's "i love you" to Glynda.

Well other than that it was a really great chapter. I had a lot of fun reading it and getting back into this story. can't wait to get to the other two chapters now.

I'm not too well versed in Romance.

To go from simple kisses to happy fun times in a period of an hour is kinda disappointing. At this point they may as well be married. "You're not allowed to kiss anyone else from now on", already went from 0 to 100. Kinda hoping there'd be some conflict with Glynda accepting Tiella's past as well. Not enough to hurt Tiella, but maybe "Putting on a facade because she's vulnerable and I'll think about it later" kind of way. Seemed to go too well despite everything I guess.

Wow, a lot happened in this chapter. I suppose we'll get a more direct look into Lillianne and Bardel now that they're met up. These three, based on their short interaction together recently, seems like it would make a... fun trio.

I didn't think such a simple sentence could hurt me so much. "He's Nora, I'm Ren". Dammit Nora.

'M back, took a break for a little while.

Reading your A/N at the top, yeah, we realize the hypocrisy in Tiella's behavior. Bet it feels good to know more than one person has pointed that out, and that your intentions pulled through.

Out of all the terms, you went with "Flick the bean". I mean, it works, but I cannot stop imagining her literally flicking a bean over and over in boredom. Probably trying to beat her previous record in distance.

Somehow it doesn't surprise me it was Coco of all people to piece everything together. Coco does strike me as the person who would notice the tiny details, more so when she's as deep into fashion as she is. And if this chapter has told me anything, this is gonna happen. Hopefully it takes a while though, you're pairing the stoic, strict Glynda with a woman who could out-flex a Gorilla Grim. Said woman is young enough to be another student for Glynda to teach, and not one to be romantically pursuing. Tricky pairing you're getting yourself into. Unless this chapter is meant to show Tiella having feels for Glynda, but those two won't get together due to other-worldliness, it will be somewhat difficult to pull off. Wish you luck for which ever path you choose.

Also, bet Coco finds it personal for Tiella to do one night stands with how stunning Tiella is. Probably would feel like a sin to allow randoms land Tiella with nothing but luck. Yeah, Coco will not accept that.

And somehow, still not surprised Yang found out too. Though it did surprise me apparently everyone else knows as well. Apparently Tiella isn't as good at stealth as we all gave her credit for :p

Forgot how long these chapters are, golly.

"Come on mustachio, time for round two!"
-0-0-
"Wait, I got smashed..."
Tiella's eyes widen and rapidly pales.
"I GOT FUCKING SMASHED! FUCK!"

Am I the only one noticing this poor choice of words? You opened this scene up with her waking up naked, habit or not. It's quite easy to jump to a wrong conclusion to this. Especially since you can't tell if she puked, walked back to the table, then said that, or if she remembered something she said at a "later time". Mixed with the fact they were both drunk? Last but not least, Tiella rushes to Glynda and exclaims she doesn't remember the night before and she likely "fucked up" and "did something bad". I did not need that mental image in my life.

Also, kinda ironic that the first few chapters Tiella complained about hating teenagers because of their raging hormones, and it seems Tiella has little control over her own hormones. Based on this information, I'd imagine Tiella would try making a move or two against Karen - unless Tiella really finds Glynda that much hotter. If she didn't, where'd her control go? If she did, wouldn't that make her a hypocrite at the time, complaining about hormones when she doesn't have control over her own? She's already a hypocrite by this point, but there's a difference between thinking it before you lost control, or if you had no control to begin with. Just my thoughts.

... Alright, I'll let that one slide. Ozpin in this story seemed out of character, in the way where he jokes/messes around, and seemed to not take a lot of things seriously. After reaching the end, I realized why. I do find Ozpin still a bit OOC to his canon counterpart, but thankfully it's not bad enough to be an issue. Ozpin seems to be more relaxed and playful in this story, opposed to his more serious and manipulative counterpart. It may be intentional, but might as well point it out.

A minute into this chapter and I've already had another problem. That "Whoops I forgot I was naked and made my situation with Glynda even more awkward" scene was just forced. Bad habits my ass. She's a mercenary. Correct me if I'm wrong, but that means she has been involved on the battlefield most her life. What is she going to do when she wakes up to bombshells? Pick up a rifle and get to shelter in her birthday suit? Spend precious minutes re-arming herself while the prude-ass soldiers outside halt their assault and wait for her to cover her exposed bits? I'm sorry, but this scene was solely added to cause Glynda and Tiella more problems. I'm also sure that Tiella has waken up twice before this incident, so where was the surprise nudity then? Did she remember in time or did she sleep clothed? Nothing was specified until now, and I think that's what's getting me here. It would've been a bit different if we knew this information before hand, but it feels as if even you didn't intend for her to sleep naked until just recently. If something like this is going to happen, then at least make it known before something happens, because at least it'll feel more natural instead of forcing it to cause more drama.

Well... That was something.

Problem.

I've already come to see as Glynda as a type of mother-figure to Tiella. Now Tiella is making moves against Glynda - even if it was a joke, it still complicates things - so now I feel uncomfortable. I don't dislike f/f pairings, but you give one hint towards almost a mother/daughter relationship, then you pull something like this. This could just be me, but sharing my thoughts as a reviewer. Even if I don't review much, I can still point things out.

Replaying and recreating the same scene from another pov is one of the dullest uses of separate pov's there is.
A much better method is to use alternate pov's to show parts of the story, characters, world that the protagonist would not come in contact with. Like what Salems side is doing, or what the teachers in the lounge would discuss, what the students would do. Tho there is nothing interesting nor entertaining outside of Tiellas pov going on at the moment.

I hope, with the following chapters, there is some progress towards what I specified.

And yes, I sent my review early. Go me. Free review.