I know you've written a bunch more stories in this universe, but i ask that you go back and reread and correct your story. I love the ideas, which is why I kept reading, but. Your thoughts are all over the place, you contradict yourself often, making it hard to know what parts are still true and what you changes. Prehapes get a beta's help. Just some ideas to make your stories easier to follow and even better than they already are.

I can't stand the 5th chapter.

Dispute's the worst, most insufferable, most unforgivable 5th chapter because of the sister drama.