Thoroughly enjoyed the story :)

Awww, what a really sweet ending and you did such a terrific job with it! I really liked the way you had Tony and Peter speak to each other and it was so gut wrenching when Peter was suddenly doused in fear of Tony, afraid to be hit. I wonder what would Peter be like if he hadn’t come as much from a protective and safe/healthy family—maybe something to explore in the future? Anyhow, great job and I really enjoyed this story for whatever it’s worth!Hope to see more from you around the corner. Cheers! Xxx

Holy crap! Wow ! This is so good! I love your story! Soooooo much! You should do another fanfiction like this! You did a great job with this story! You totally deserve a round of applause

Omg that was perfect! I really need you to write more of this stuff! You are really talented!

Such a lovely short story. Thanks for doing this!

I thought it was a cute story. Tony was OOC, but I know that you meant that. So I don't see that as an issue. You did a good job developing the story and your plot was a nice change of pace to the normal fanfiction I see. Thank you for writing this!

Lived this story! I hope you write more of this duo

THE BABIES! Cute story!

Before and after Tony chapter 4

Before: intact

After: not intact

Hi! So I think the great thing about writing and art in general is that the more we do it the better we’re able to get at it. There is always room for improvement and that’s so wonderful and great. I think if you were to rewrite this story say three years from now, it would look a lot different and I think the idea is fantastic and that your writing today isn’t quite all the way there to really make it believable and not OOC. I think if you spent more time fleshing out our characters with their thoughts and feelings and intentions and motivations it would really improve the work. When you do describe you do it well so you definitely have the ability for sure. I think learning more about punctuation will help too to make it an easier form of digesting information.

Also because Peter was on a balcony I was totally expecting him to fall off it ahaha but that’s probably from the influence of my own fics :D

I will still follow where this goes and hope you don’t mind my ramblingsStay safe!

Hi again!

So I really think you’ve got an excellent type of story going here although the grammar and spelling is making it a little hard to read and enjoy thoroughly. I also think you need to consider who your audience is and that we’re smart people and can read between the lines so you don’t have to spell everything out for us like with the breaks between “inside” and “outside”. If we’d been reading along we’d know who is inside the compound versus outside of it. I also think labeling it the way you have here makes it seem more like a screenplay which it’s not so it’s off putting. I’d suggest if you do really want both perspectives at the same time to instead use page breaks. Same for with Friday talking, you could add more to her tone and her urgency and describing that in detail than just prefacing her talking and then the words that she says. I still want to see where you’re going with this and think it’s a neat idea! I’ll be reading the next bit soon. Thanks for sharing this story with us!xxx

Ooh he’s gonna get it now

Hi!

I really liked this first chapter of your fic. I think it has a LOT of potential and that you need just a little bit of work on the body of the work to really match all of its hopes and dreams. For instance, I found that you had a few grammatical/spelling errors throughout your fic and you also lacked a lot of punctuation in places too. Getting a beta reader or waiting to review and edit your work would probably really help you out, and I'm sure people out there would be willing to help you with this, too! Also I noticed that sometimes you change perspectives really quickly and that can be a little jarring as the reader (you switched at times from Peter's musings and feelings straight into Tony's or Bruce's, but without fleshing it out further, too.) Try and go a little slower if you need to because the pacing can be swift and reeling when it doesn't necessarily have to be. Again though I think you've got a great thing going here and I can't wait to continue reading your work and everything you're going to do with this story! :) Good luck and cheers! xxx

Holy crap! This is sooooooo good! I love this story a lot! You need to update like right now . Please update today! I need to know what happens next! Great job so far though.

Huh, it's gonna be tough. I'm sure Peter will forgive Tony in no time. But Tony won't forgive himself and that's even worse than the other Avengers being mad at him. I'm looking forward the next chapter!