Me: *Reading* Well, this idea seems neat as far as I'm concerned.

*Corrin*:"I pat her head"

Me: *Dies in wholesomeness*

This is a refreshing take on Fates. That game really dropped the ball on its story despite the stellar gameplay of Conquest.

I hope this aims to not only rectify its mistakes but also add something completely original into the mix. That story had the best potential out of all FE games since Awakening brought the series back from the brink of death.

I’d love to see more of the dragon come into play. In Fates it feels like Corrin being a dragon wasn’t given enough of the attention it deserved, everyone’s reaction was mostly focused on more mundane things rather than the fact that Corrin is a fucking divine serpent.

And speaking of the dragon, I do have one request: make this dragon awesome and awe-inspiring. It looked majestic in fates but I felt like it was far too small and it’s design was closer to a damn llama with wings than a cool holy serpent. Make it bigger to the point of where it’s a genuine threat to castles and entire armies, make the dragon a big deal in every sense of the word. Have everyone stare at it in awe, respect, fear, etc.

Aside from that, I am interested to se show this Corrin pans out. He hopefully doesn’t seem to be as stupid and naive as his in-game self. I wanna see more grit to him, more maturing, more absolution, and some minor sass too like Dante from Devil May Cry, but also with the steel determination of Doomguy to get things done.

I’m anticipating the next chapter with glee, we don’t get that much fates these days and even less are as exciting as this. Good luck to Corrin and his confused boner when he’s around Camilla because I can’t imagine how hard he’ll falter when someone like Kagero is introduced. Poor kid.

This is an excellent chapter. I'm kinds sorry I didn't pay more attention duringn the writing process, but that does mean I get to review it here. The introduction is surprisingly emotionally effective, and really draws the reader in. It raises some questions about the hows and whys, but that's good. Leaves stuff open to explore later. And I enjoyed all the interactions with the siblings. It's fascinating to see them younger like this, and the fact that they still feel in character is a testament to your understanding of them. Great work.

Of course the first scene with camilla has to involve the marshmallows.

A good setup, for now.
Hope the 'real' Corrin heals somewhat from the trauma.
The introductions of the Nohrian siblings are cuuuute.
Huh. Never thought of Corrin's bare feet that way.
Camilla is your big sister. Luck–I mean, poor you.
Wonder what you're planning to do in the fortress. Hope to see more!