A fantastic journey if you asked me . Just captivating .

Marmee ? And where does that name come from ?

Now my question is , is this the road to Heaven or the road to the deepest corner of Hell ?

Talking about a shock !

She's losing it , isn't ?

First .It's a very interesting idea ! And secondly that they could kill Jarod by bad luck , I can believe it . But that Mr Parker and co would actually be happy about it ? I don't think so . Because he is their PRECIOUS !

So, I've been reading till chapter 44 now, and I'll leave a proper review when I'm finished. I just wanted to tell you two minor things before I forget about them again: you shouldn't always use so many "...". You could also use commas, or - the elegant solution, those finde signs "-". And if you have to use the dots, just write three, not millions of them. And you shouldn't always write people's names, use expressions like "the blunette" or "the girl" or "she" or "he" instead, it isn't necessary to always use the name.

That was a really nice twist in your fic I enjoyed greatly. So I hope you'll continue.

Wow. What a ride!

I read it all in one sitting, a bit over two hours. Good thing it's summer break, huh? It's a real page-uh-clicker.

After that sort of manic indulgence, though, the problem arises when it comes to the review: I'm not sure where to start... so I guess I 'll go with the last turning point. (Others have included "spoilers" in their reviews, but I try not to. We'll see if I can remain true to that resolution.)

Your consistent juggling of plots and imaginative mini-stories was excellent. You maintained a strong feeling of suspense throughout - though I'm still reconciling your portrayal of Lyle. :-)

The Big Crossover was a big disappointment to me, I confess. I'm not a fan of the show you crossed over to (not that I actually *dislike* it; I just haven't had time to get involved with it). Consequently, it was a blow to my suspension of disbelief. (Funny enough, the presence of Amanda was not. I guess the series appearance of the ghost of "Angel" Parker in IOTH prepared me for that one... I loved both cemetery scenes- but still, the crossover rankles.)

I also felt a little disappointed when I clicked to Chapter 66 and found a character list instead of a tie-up of the loose end with Jarod. I agree with the reviewer who applauded Miss P's reaction to the phone call (absolutely well done), but I had the lingering sense of needing a little more closure with him and our Miss P (or G, as the case may be). PLUS I desperately wanted to see the look on his face when she introduced him to not ONE surprise genetic experiment, but - you know the number! :-)

Two technical things, one small, one large.

Large: you should consider running your story by a beta, or at the very least through spellcheck. The typical confusions of "there/they're/their" and "your/you're" as well as some other basic typographical/spelling errors can be truly distracting and erode the sense of professionalism you likely want to present.

The small thing, which you may certainly dismiss as nitpicking if you choose, is about the "Marmee" thing. I think your borrowing from Alcott was truly inspired, but I just don't see Catherine choosing the New England phonetic equivalent of "Mommy" as her child's name.

Overall, though, it was a great and monumental read. Thank you for sharing your magnum opus!

honestly,

i don't like the way truth was revealed to miss parker/green. i mean, the ghoul thing is so farfetched, but i liked the idea of "jarod is the man of the descendant", it shows the uniqueness why Centre was after Jarod, but could you make it a little more truth-like.

Such as, raines is inventing new cancer chemical that could eat children, take thier souls away...etc. something soo dramatic and real. Something that Parker could fix the problem when hearing this. soemthing that will drive her further to stop all the Centre madness and bring in the institution it once was, that helped the gifted children.

the alien thing, the stargate thing doesn't interest any pretender fans here. so, make sure you do 'please" them instead of driving them away.

jarodparkerfan.

hey,

i really loved your story so much, it gives us the greater insight to the whole pretender series. but, otherwise..i'd like you to continue the story from "all or nothing".

My suggestions would be:

1. from the entrace to mr. parker's office, she gave a very very venomnous warning to the Centre officials, like Raines, and its staff and declare that they will pay the price for what they did to her, to jarod, to his family..etc (give miss parker the authorative figure, that she could ovethrown centre, and transform it into a helpful institution it once was.

2. Include Margaret as often as it should. she's jarod's mother.

3. in this story, it was all a dream too real, with Jarod dead. Now, Miss parker got the warning from Amanda...is that her name? Well, the little girl by Thomas's headstone. So, when parker set on foot to rescue the children, let Jarod be alive.

4. Parker to marry Jarod, having her first name revealed to Jarod, in front of an audience, and become Mrs. Marmee Jo Charles.

5. Marmee to gain power in ruling the Centre, and help gifted children. Jarod to become the King of Centre. Husband and Wife works together to run the Centre.

6. The story ends with the couple, children, thier families, extended families in a city called "Paradise Island", where it's all heavenly like. Or atleast a place, where they all will enjoy a lifetime together, till death.

Hope it does give you some idea. "I'm learning", the spin-off series that you wrote is a little complete off from "all or nothing", because first it took place in 's office, at the centre and then you shifted the focus elsewhere.

so, just a thought.

until then, hope you can write this fanfic, if not for others, atleast for me.

Thanks,

jarodparkerfan.

Wonderful job!

I liked how MP character changed, very subtly, and yet managed to remain the same. I am sorry to learn of Amanda's demise, but I still hope that she is alive... After all, no one dies at the Center!

Loved how MP reacted to J's phone call and hope that Jarod will get a clue soon ( can I hint at a more direct MPJR?). MP speaking French, recognizing her father, talking to Lyle, and finally listening to her children were all great to this plot and I look forward to reading the sequel...

You're not giving up, right? I know you already posted five chaps of " I'm learning" and I will be going to read them all really soon. I just hope you keep writing this wonderful story ( which I had to read through twice to remember all details when you posted these last few chaps), after all... You've come this far and it would be a shame quitting now.

So hang in there... If you need, you have this fan's support through high and low.

To finish this review, I have to say this once more... GREAT STORY, GREAT WRITING! CONGRATS!

of we want the second part of the story! YES YES! please.I'm begging here!

Ilove the story please finish it

thank you Ruby

I loved thsi story. Though it was a while b4 this chapter wnet up I had to review the other chapters first. But I loved the flashback and then how she used her dream knowledge to affect her present. But what's up with "I'm Learning"? How will you link that sotry to the ending of this one. And I really think Jarod should have a hand in raising these 29 children. Don't you?