Wow, that was a powerful story. I'm so glad that I finally took the time to read it because it was totally worth it. This final chapter is a masterpiece-this entire story is a masterpiece. I love how you artfully put small details in here that really add to the story later on. Like that conversation with Taniya in the middle of chapter 7 really makes you think about Ekou's charachter at the very end of the story. Also, I like how she describes Edo. It's kind of odd how she just thinks about him as "the short guy" at first but he's the one who goes up to bat for her at the end.

There are little tiny details that you added that made the story seem really realistic. Like the brances that hit her face and stuff like that. The description of Chronos made me laugh too.

The story really makes you think too beacuse it adds to the canon events that you see and just makes everything much more dramatic. It really makes you think about Ekou's and Amon's characters-especially Ekou. Before I read this story, she was just a minor GX character but you just brought her to life; that's an art. Also, Amon was a sorta 'ok' character with me-a character you don't really like but don't have a strong dislike towards either but after reading this, I can't stand his character.

Overall, this is a great story. You did a wonderful job.

Oh wow. O.O Just...wow. That was amazing. I'm not even sure how to properly form my words but...I'll try. ;

To start off with, I'll say I'm hugely impressed with you characterization and knowledge of canon. That's always been your strongest point. I can hear the characters talking like that, thinking like that. I can see them doing those actions and interacting in that manner. You hit that right on. Furthermore, you fit your story right into canon, and you worked hard at it, and you succeeded. You are convincing enough to make the reader believe that your take on it and your story actually happened in the canon. Because your knowledge of the characters and events is so vast. Beautiful! You managed to properly balance canon with creativity, and that is a HUGE skill.

Also, I'd like to say that I love how it came to a full circle. You came back to the beginning of the story, and gave it a clincher. I love your structure. It's just epic. I also love how you had Ekou narrating it sort of like it was happening, but from a different time and place. By the way you formed your verb tenses, you made it seem like it was happening at that very instant, almost as though to indicate that where Ekou was then had no time or constraints. It really said a lot.

I will also add that there is a certain amount of irony portrayed. I like how Ekou viewed herself as strong but who was, in fact, weaker than she thought. This was especially shown in contrast with Taniya. I like how you showed how the ideal relationship that Ekou really would have liked-Taniya's relationship with Misawa and Anna-was so sharply opposite with the reality of things. I think it was very realistic and it was one of the best formatted pieces I've seen by you.

Also, I think it sad that Ekou valued herself so lowly, thanks on part to Amon and the way he belittled her, though she was too oblivious to know it. Ekou really does view herself the opposite of what she is, in my opinion. It's really sad, especially at the part where she said she wanted the twins to take after Amon since he was the "better looking" of them. I really have to disagree with this statement. Ekou is beautiful. But she is so consumed with self-consciousness that has been hammered into her since childhood...it was all due to her treatment as an inferior being and upbringing. It's really sad to see how she grew up and developed such a twisted image of herself.

You did a BEAUTIFUL job at creating this backstory, and it was stably structured and well connected with wonderfully smooth transitions. None of it was choppy, it was natural, it was an enjoyable read. And it really flowed. I applaud you for your work.

Of course, there was the occasional type or spelling or grammatical error, but that's to be expected on such a monumental work. After all, one cannot catch all these errors all the time, even with spellcheck.

All in all, I really enjoyed the take on this. I would like to see, though, what happened with Ekou in the alternate dimension, but that might take away from the charm of this piece, to be sure. I think you wrapped it up at a good point and nicely too. This is, indeed, your best work yet, and I shall be most surely recommending it. Sorry I have no con crit but I just can't find anything wrong with this chapter or the piece as a whole. Keep up the good work, and don't give up writing, because you most certainly are getting better at it!

Ah, I was tired when I wrote that DA post, but it woke me up, so I ran here!

XD

Ah, jsd;ajkgh;ajhjk-I loved this chapter so much, and nu at Ekou's Song being over.

;n;

Follow-up pictures, please. D:

Anyways, to reverse a House quote, my review's going to get worse before it gets better.

Crit: I agree with Angel. Some parts sounded more like you than Ekou, which made it kinda awkward. And I was sort of feeling iffy about Ekou thinking Ryo is hot(there's nothing more accurate than Ed being short, so I lawled at that because it's true!), but he looks like he's into bondage, so yeah. It works, bwahahaha, BDSM. But yeah, like Angel said, tone down the sarcasm about the other characters a bit, and it's all good. :D

Also:“Can you please(spaceplease)get out of my way already?" Just pointing that out. o.o; It's not a big deal. xD

But:"The man (well, he was a man as far as I could tell)..." That was kinda...yeah. I dunno, but that made me think of what a lot of fanpunks say about him, and not what Ekou would say. :(

But other than that, you got Ekou's character down perfectly! C: Her hopes and fears, her determination and uncertainty, everything!

Anyways, sque, Chronos! 8D 8D 8D He was hilarous! XD I loved how you worked him into this and how you portrayed him. "Mamma mia!" Not sure if I saw a "na no nae!" in there...

And, swet, Misawa and Taniya! XD That part was epic! Lawlz, Spot. XD

Ohyeah, Misawa, you totally stayed behind to "help" Taniya with something, too bad your friends will never know what (except Chronos). Lawlz, you can't say "Go get her, tiger!" to Misawa, because the tiger got him!

XD

And I'm so glad you wrote Taniya as her old Season One self, instead of what she was like in Season Three. She's so funny and awesome the way you wrote her. X3

And D'AW at Anna. :3 She has your eyes, Misawa! XD

This was unexpected: "Spot the dog was actually a Duel Spirit, and all Duel Spirits followed a certain code. This code stated that if any spirit ever hurt a small child, nursing mother, or pregnant woman, it was the most unforgivable crime that could ever be committed."

I don't get it. I thought Duel Spirits had no code...:? Exodia sure didn't follow it, that's for sure! o,o

Laugh Out Loud, at the Abare Ushioni part. AH! XD Those red bulls gave them wings!

Ahahahahahahahaha, comparing Ed to Prince? XD You're killing my face muscles! XD But you're right. o.o Hahahaha, and this only makes me giggle more, since I like Prince...o_o;; XD

Poor Sho is short, Shorter Guy. XD He's so short, if he looked right at Asuka, he'd be a perv, because he's eye-level with her chesticles! XD

Poor Ed. : ( He meant well...gah, I always try to avoid episode 144! D': You stink, Amon, you stink. DX

...The ending was the most beautiful part, so haunting and chilling, especially with the voices telling Ekou that it's okay, when it's not. But at least, and too late, Amon realizes how much he did love her, and needed her.

The last line was...incredible, and leaves one of the most lasting impressions of anything I have ever read.

"A long time ago, I inquired if you knew me. Well, now I know the answer. You do not know me, nor does anyone. How could anyone understand how I could be willing to do so much for one person?"

Well done, Kirby, well done. ;_; *salute*

You did a nice fic on Adrian & Echo [Ekou & Amon]; at first, I wasn't too fond of these character, but the pairing is perfect.

NICE WORK!

(_) Yokai Summoner

Wow...just WOW...I'm absolutely blown away...

I love the way you portrayed Chronos. You showed that though he does do foolish things a lot of the time, he really does have good intentions. Actually, you just had good characterization in general. They all behaved exactly as they would've in the show, I think. I also appreciated the fact that you followed the canon storyline and tried to keep as close to it as possible. Did I mention this has such an excellent plot? It all ties together so well it's almost as though it truly is part of the show.

I found the part about her hearing her babies talking to her very touching and heartbreaking. I have to hand it to you, Kirby; you sure know how to tug at someone's heart. Your stories are always written so soulfully and with such meaning...I can't put it into words well, but I really appreciate all the heart and effort that goes into your fics.

As for the writing itself...that was also very well-done. The words and phrases you chose to describe feelings and situations. You explain things very well. You're on a very high level of writing that we don't see often on this site.

Hope you don't mind a small bit of critique - though I'm more or less calling it just my opinion rather than advice since I know nothing about writing anyway. XD I just thought your own thoughts and emotions leaked a bit too much into the fic. There was a fairly strong overtone of sarcasm and disgust with the world that I don't see quite as much from Ekou in the show as in here. However, it's not wrong. I just felt it needed to be slightly toned down, that's all. But that's just my opinion, and it's only a minor little detail so don't worry about it.

Another really good thing - you tend to be very, very realistic with your fics. I just love that in midst of all these cliche fairy tale-like fics, you give us a good dose of truth. We could all use that once in a while.

Very touching, well-written, and all-around amazing. Congrats on finishing it; I'll miss reading it!

LKNSDG;OSNBG;KSDNGLIHGLVSDKHG;m;D!11!one

I LOVE this fic! I was completely enthralled in it. I could NOT stop reading! Your storytelling skills are amazing. I LOVED how you kept so true to canon and reality that it made me wonder if that had actually happened in the show. O_o It all connected so perfectly. The descriptions...the plot...the character...ESPECIALLY the character. I can see them all doing actually doing this. I have doubt in my mind that this is something that could've actually taken place in the show. The way it all tied together was amazing. I love the devotion that Ekou had towards Amon and basically all the character interaction and relationships. This was seriously like one of those books you can't put down. I haven't read a story that I haven't been able to put down in probably years. So PLEASE, PLEASE update! I can't wait to know what happens! Fantastic story; best I've read in ages.

Wow, you certainly worked a lot on that chapter. :) I like how your story is builing up, as in, Ekou keeps getting in more and more trouble. It seems that the longer that things go, the more exhausted she becomes, and the more foolish her decisions become too. She seems to have transitioned from being with Amon to being alone, which is a huge development. It's so amazing how you can stick SO close to the canon story, yet still keep it a spin-off and interesting. Now THAT is a great feat to accomplish. I will say that, not many people can do that. :P I'm more than impressed. Keep up the good work!

I love you.

When I was first going to read this, I said to myself :"Self, you shouldn't sit down and read this all in one shot; it will take you an hour. It would be best if you split it up into 2 days." Then, I started reading it and...well, it looks like I didn't listen to myself. XD It was too good to put down. It got to the point where I'd be thinking just like Ekou. It was kind of cool. The scene where Michael is standing outside of her room, I thought "Uh-oh" and then she said that the next sentence.

I really like where you're taking this story. I like Michael's character too; he's a good OC. I think that you did a great job following canon rules too. (Which are very hard to follow-especially in GX in which the canon rules make little sense.)

I love every part of this story. You really bring Ekou's character to life in the eyes of the readers. Now when I watch GX and see Ekou, I give her a backstory because of this fic. Thank you for that. _

O_o?

Freaky...

I was logged in when I sent in my Chapter Six review, but when I checked to see if FFnet ate my review like it did when I reviewed Olynthus's fic, it says the review is anonymous.

...SO, DUN DELETE THAT! IT'S ME! XD

Chapter Five was awesome too, you know that. *_*

And thankies for moving the author's notes, though you didn't have to, really, but it's so nice that you did. :)

Smooth reading through to the end, so as to leave a lasting impression...

Marvelous. :D

...Ahahaha, I hope the weird thing does not happen again. X_x

PS~

Chazzy inspired you?

8D

That's tre COOLIO, and I would so totally read her ficcie, but, um, I can't if it's rated M, or something, so...? ._.;

...Hmm.

Want for I draw some Ekou fanart, or a scene from this fic? I can't do anything explicit, and I can't do it too soon, but I can do it!

So, yeah.

o.o?

Hahaha, Yu-Gi-Oh isn't nonsensical, it's unexplainable!

:-B

A world full of mysteries, like ball lightning, so you're fine.

(NO SENSE MADE. XD)

Random: I listened to "Bent" by Matchbox Twenty, and "I Will Possess Your Heart" by Death Cab for Cutie while I read this. :P

Anyways...

*_*... ...0_o...:D...XD...*0*

This chapter was both intense and hilarious, because of all those awkward moments coupled with Ekou's side-splitting "commentary."

Hahaha, in these *delicate* situations, her thoughts and actions are very *un-lady-like*, which is totally awesome. B-D

Well, she has cute thoughts about her child, ignoring the negatives. XP

And laugh out loud, at those nicknames she gives out, and the "I spat at his feet to show him my undying gratitude" part. XD

("The jig is up, the news is out, they finally found me, the renegade who had it made...)

Whoa, and a major twist! Take out the last "t", put an "n" before the "s" in "twist", and that spells "TWINS"! I think! XD

Oh, and the crying again? O_o Is she hallucinating?

*dense*

Oh! And does this go all the way up to episodes 143-144, and perhaps beyond? Also, any mentions to Amon's duel with Johuber?

T_T

If so, I hope Ekou isn't too mean to Ed...and NU, Amon and his darned Exodios!

_

Aw, it's so sad how dedicated she is to Amon, and how callously he throws her away. I think regret was the only redeeming thing he showed. :/

Ahaha, Michael of Rabin has returned! Wow, and he's very ninja-ish, with his secretkeeping tactics and all.

_

Smooth sailing~

It's kind of funny how Ekou gets him to help her, even if she is mentally disturbed and a danger to everyone, kinda similar to how the Academia knows all about certain "things", but does nothing about them anyway. XP

Oh no! The teachers are getting sued!

D:

They should hide in the Principal's Cyber Cave!

Or Kaiba does something about it, and Peg laughs about it later and says,"Hey, at least I got that Rainbow Dragon for your students, heheheh, and all you had to do was cover for your employees with half your savings.:3"

Hey, she meets Chronos the Chickenman too!

XD

And they get chased by those monsters with the name I can't spell or remember!

Ah, the next chapter is the last?

;_;

*gives submarine salute*

Best Ekou fic ever.

Good luck on the next chapter, I'm certain it will be more than fantastico!

:D

Wow, that was definitely better than the last chapter. Perhaps it was even your best chapter so far! You had lots of character emotion and it was conveyed quite well. I also liked the turn of events and how you caught up to the GX storyline from a different perspective. It was very tense by the end. Nice job at building suspense.

I don't really have much to say about this chapter since it is so well written and I've already voiced everything in the previous chapters. It was quite realistic, as I can tell from your research. I'm glad you're so finicky. Truth be told, I research everything I don't know about, even down to what model car I want in my fics! All I can say about that is, it shows that you really care and you're willing to put in the time. It makes it a whole lot better. :)

Well, this chapter was good, but it seemed to be lacking compared to the last three chapters. Chapter three was so phenomenal, that this one had a lot of expectations to live up to, so I can safely say that although it wasn't as good as the last chapter, it was still important to the story's development. Clearly, this is yet another transitional chapter. We see the characters growing older and maturing, as well as their relationships.

I would like to say first that Amon's character seemed to become more developed and apparent here. He was highly respectful of those around him, whether or not he had money. However, as his behavior towards others changed, so did his behavior towards Ekou. He seems to be becoming more hostile and domineering towards her, and while she's trying to put up a sort of tough, independent face (through working for her father's company, cutting her hair, and bodybuilding, all which makes quite a statement) she also seems to be yielding even more to him. My take on it was that she was growing weaker and more unable to deny him and more compliant with him while becoming stronger in other areas. Yet that one weakness is enough to bring her down, since he doesn't care for her quite as much as she cares for him. At this point, he has overstepped the level of indifference as far as she is concerned. Since she let him treat her as such from the beginning, due to her naivette, now he has treated her with such low regard that he even places an impoverished person above her status. We see his discomfort in showing any affection or compassion for her not only by the way he snaps at her and his choice of diction, but also in the sense that he chose to hold Sid's hand instead of Ekou's. Remarkable work as far as conveying the relationships. Beautiful work.

Now, enough of that analysis and on to some constructive criticism. In your retelling of the events, it dragged a bit and seemed sort of dull and lacking certain emotion. You did quite well with how Ekou felt about Amon and that should indeed be the highlight of the story, however, I would like to know of her feelings concerning the fact that Amon is somewhat mistreating her. Perhaps she's frustrated and does not know why? Because, after all, she is disillusioned by his "affections" which seem to be more or less just to use her as a relief from sexual frustration, and also a source of power. He can obviously do whatever he wants to her without her complaint, so why don't we see him treating others like that? Is it slowly building up until it leaks out into his affairs with others? If this is the case, then bravo. I applaud you in the sense that Amon is revealing a different side of him, his ugly side, to Ekou and none else. He has kept his true behavior secret in order to win favors and the such. And Ekou continues to see him as others do, regardless of his actions towards her. Perhaps though, revealing a bit of sorrow over her pregnancy and over Amon would do. I think that the emotion is lacking as far as that is concerned. She doesn't seem quite as torn up as she should be. Perhaps it is do to cluelessness or naivette. For her age, she's slowly maturing, but not quite to the point she should be. Of course, her being sheltered, I do believe it is a realistic view of what one in that situation would behave. Just adding some hints or twinges of deeper emotion would help. What I guess I'm trying to say is, go farther with her emotions. Raise the stakes. Why does she feel that way? How deeply does she? Is she denying she's in pain? Apparently, from her moping in her bed she has depression, yet does not seem willing to admit it. I do believe, though, there is potential to further develop raw emotion to the point of breaking here. Good job as far as that is concerned.

There were a few grammatical errors, but that is to be expected since you typed such a long chapter. Not to mention one cannot catch every error. I do believe it was a mere typo. Nothing to be overly concerned about.

All in all I'd have to say that this was a great chapter, although it seemed as though some of the paragraphs were unecessary and a bit short. Though I do not know how they will come into play later, so it might be that all the details about how boring her life is might be, indeed, necessary. It sort of brings out that she's overly protected and does not know much about the real world. If that's the case, then the little minute bits and pieces are a nice addition to the story, though it might be a bit drab for the reader to plow through.

I hope I've made myself clear on this. ; I really do enjoy it, so don't think that I'm bashing it or anything. I just tend to overly analyze things as I'm typing. Please continue the good work. :P

That was dreadfully angsty and sad...I had no idea that she would actually do it with Amon! What a twist! And he was so jerkish about it too...

I like how the chapter transitioned. It's like she has fully grown into womanhood. And you really do have a fascintation with pregnancy, huh? Not a bad thing. Poor Ekou. :( It's as though Amon didn't even care. He only seemed to care when there was competition. And he used that and her ignorance to persuade her to have sex with him. That was pretty cruel. But it seems something like he'd do, something for his own personal benefit and nothing more.

I also liked how you added Ekou's thoughts between dialogue. That added some insight to what she was thinking and feeling. Good job for that.

I'm still not sure if I like the parenthesis interruption a thought but...I'm pretty sure I do the same thing with dashes and it does add some extra information. I just think perhaps it can be tied in some other way. I don't know.

There were a few typos, but that's to be expected with such a long chapter. And it's a wonder that you sat down and wrote half of it in one sitting! It's so good. This material takes careful planning and work for DAYS I do believe.

I really like the ending. It's sort of like a foreshadowing and a symbolism in a sense. It says to me that she's going to be haunted by her actions and Amon's abandonment for eternity. And the irony! While Amon showed her that Michael would "hurt" her, it was actually him that she had to watch out for! After all, she shouldn't have let her emotions take over (since he'd abandoned her for awhile anyway). But you can't really expect one of her age to understand that. Emotions take control so easily and bad decisions are made based on that. I thought it was quite realistic in that sense.

I'd also like to add that I think the characters were completely in character. A lot of people find it difficult to do this and maintain it for as long as you have. Good job on that too.

Furthermore, I'd like to add that I LOVE your portrayal of Ekou. You've taken her character and her hurt and given her a past and a reason for that hurt and how she developed into the person she is later. Also, you sort of tell it like she's telling the story as she's older, but also like it's happening presently. This is really difficult to pull off without switching verb tenses or being confusing. But you shifted it subtly, and you did it well enough to keep the story's pace up and keep things detailed and interesting.

You have a variety of things that happen in each chapter, yet each chapter seems to have a theme, transition to a new understanding, and a common tone. I really like how you structured this story and do believe it is something to be proud of.

This is one of your best stories, and I can tell that you put utmost care, effort and time into it. I commend you on that. I'm quite pleased with how your story is coming out, and the best of luck to you with the later chapters!

Well, this certainly was a transition chapter. So much happened...she started to mature and her relationship with Amon changed.

I really enjoy your decriptions. The imagery is fantastic, especially since the story just flowed. I could picture everything about the party and the way she carried herself and her dress ever. Phenomenal.

Furthermore, I really like how you incorporated your dialogue. It was just the right amount to give meaning to the story without disrupting the flow or her narrative. Good job on that too.

You developed Amon and Ekou's relationship nicely. It seemed to be subtly changing at first, with small hints here and there. It transitioned rather nicely.

I will say that the parenthesis sort of disrupt the flow a little. I'm talking about the one sentence where Ekou was mentioning that when Amon was king, he'd acknowledge the women's efforts. It sort of just stuck out to me and I think it could've been transitioned in somehow. Otherwise, it was very good.

I like this chapter better because it wasn't as verbose and it wasn't as draggy with length. You know well to only carry out a chapter as long as the energy is still there, which you've managed to do so well here. Also, you kept the reader's interest by moving the story along and developing it. The last sentence really build up some suspense and anticipation. Good job.