That's really lovely...although I'm a sucker for happy ending and everything this made me smile! Great Job!

That was cruel of you, making me think Sarah'd died at the beginning of the story. (But that was your intention, wasn't it?)

And it's an interesting take on Jareth's emotions - is he happy that Toby's found happiness with his wife and daughter, or does he still want Toby for himself, regardless of any present happiness?

This was beautiful. I loved the Goblin King in the movie, especially because he genuinely seemed to like the babe.

Thank you for writing this. . You made my day.

This was sweet. It always seemed that Jareth and Toby could have had something special without it being romantic. However what happened to Sarah exactly?

Keep Writing!

Bah! Now I'm going to have to go and read everything you've offered to this website... but I have to do it tomorrow evening as 3AM comes early, even in the autumn. This was a darling piece and I got all misty with the lump in my throat and everything. .

I like the twists and your characterizations really seem spot on.

Peace be with you,

-V-

Somewhere along the way I totally spaced this one out!

"He is at ease with himself, yet he is mindful of what is his." - Hmm...yummy. A man who can do that... Sexy.

This is a side I never thought much about, but is fitting with what we see on screen. Jareth really takes to Toby. His panicked "Take the baby and hide it!" has a whole new meaning now.

At least we know some of Jareth rubbed off on him, even if he didn't get to share his life with him.

Aw! That's so sweet! I feel so bad for Jareth, now. I'm all depressed. This was a really good story, and I liked the little part at he end between Kimmy and Toby, that was a good touch.

When you said you weren't sure about the voice in this one, I assumed you would *really* have trouble with the voice.

Clearly, in this fiction, you do not.

There are some places that I would have rearranged sentences and words but then you're writing a slightly different Jareth to one I would write. Yours is naturally colder, thereby burning more fiercely. Mine tends to express and be done with it. Very much, in fact, like your Toby. _

No, I don't think you've messed up with the voice at all. I think you've written a voice that works very well with your story. Your strongest voice is Kimmy, however; she just came to life in the reading. And I loved reading her. She sounds like such a bright, engaging little girl.

All in all, I really like this piece. And one of your other reviewers was right- it is fitting for Fathers' Day.

ok, now you've done it...I'm in tears...

You've done it for me, indeed. Thank you.

And thank you for this fic. It is very poignant - a fine offering for Father's Day. For that's what strikes at Jareth's heart here, isn't it ... the fact that Toby is now grown, with a child of his own, and J. lost him a long time ago.

I have to say, at the beginning, I thought that you were going to have Sarah be dead. Then it turned out she was a vet, and my ardent J/S self squealed: "There's still a chance!" ... But then I realized: that's not the point of your story; that's not what you're trying to write, is it? What if Sarah were truly secondary? What if Jareth's heart (if he has one, which I think he does here) broke when he had to give up the child - not when Sarah rejected him?

That would make for a different story than what usually bubbles up in the Labyrinth fandom. The search for a long-lost or long-desired child, instead of the conflicts of lovers, or haters, or whatever S & J are these days. Yes - the search for a son ... there's an entire world to explore there. Thank you for this fic.

Mustn’t anthropomorphize, the man thought to himself.

I love the owl. Very sweet and a neat concept. Excellent imagery!

That was really good! I like Jareth's musings, it's very in-keeping with his behaviour towards Toby in the movie!

Very cute - I rather liked the twist of Toby, grown. Jareth's thoughts were also nice - again, an interesting twist, and not something you see very often in Labyfic.

Good Job )

this is a really nice story

Thanks for sharing. n_~