I dont like fincs where Shampoo's bashed...but that "Shampoo have headache...in whole body..." was hilarious.

Interesting story. Kitsune is a rather "interesting" choice for a Green Lantern. A dysfunctional Green Lantern, but ok. You're choice of Batwoman was also pretty interesting and totally unexpected.

I can't wait to see what happens next. What other supers will show up? What about Batman and Robin? What about Super Girl, or Aquaman?

Anywho, keep it up. This is getting entertaining, and I'd like to know what kind of promise Brainiac made to Ryoko. Assuming he keeps his promise, which he's notorious for not doing.

how many cross-overs can u put in one fic...lol

It is I, ~invalidgriffin! At your request, here is my review. It covers all six chapters, and it kind of got out of control, so it was split up into sections. A lot of it is really nitpicking, since essentially the structure of your fic is sound. Really, just about everything said here is something to consider for future endeavors.

Style:

I'm not really used to first person narratives - I am actually pretty unreasonably biased against them - but they're easier to stomach when they're well written. In the context of this fic, I don't know if it really fits the story you're telling. The fact that you occasionally switch between first and third person is also somewhat jostling. I enjoy the story when it's told to me objectively, so when it switches to me sitting in Keitaro's head, I have to stop and readjust. Having to do this takes away from my reading experience. My advice is to choose a style and stick to it - consistency is your friend when it comes to not confusing/annoying/jostling your reader.

Genre:

I am thoroughly amused. That's a good sign, at least. I like that Magical Girls are entirely common (then again, with Metahumans, nothing is out of the ordinary), and that the universe is in deep enough trouble that Kitsune can be approved as a Green Lantern. Someone must have really dropped the ball, there.

I did not realize that this would be a *big* crossover - my understanding was that it was going to be Love Hina/DC and not Love Hina/DC/Kitchen Sink, but so far it's been pretty enjoyable. Sakaki as Wonder Woman especially so. It's so crazy, it just might work.

Characterization:

Setting up Keitaro as a Clark Kent figure is clever, I admit. He's just the kind of mild-mannered little guy you'd never, ever suspect. I kind of feel like he's out of character, but then Keitaro isn't actually invincible, so I guess it'd be hard to judge how he'd act if he was. I think you're doing a pretty good job in handling it.

I think you made some wise choices - practically and comedically - for heroes. Sakaki as Wonder Woman gives WW an entirely new spin - where Diana is pretty headstrong and straightforward, Sakaki tends to be milder and easygoing (though we all know she could totally kick ass if she really had to). Sakaki taking on the role of Wonder Woman probably deserves its own fic, *that's* how in depth it could go, especially if you focused on the more sensitive aspects of her personality. - It's like Azumanga Elseworlds here. Imagine that.

Kitsune as a Green Lantern is a flat-out hysterical thought. It is terrible and awesome. Like Guy Gardner - who, as far as I'm concerned, is the one and only Green Lantern, Hal Jordan be damned.

Like Keitaro, it's weird to think of Mutsumi as Batwoman. You kind of dealt with origins and what-not already, but it's still just really, really weird. The Dark Anemic Avenger. Just... wow. I would not have seen that coming, EVER, which may be a good thing or a bad thing. I'm not sure yet. But, the fact she switches personalities helps it along. Bruce Wayne does that himself, anyway.

I love the decided lack of girl power amongst the Sailor Scouts. Because that's just how it is with them. How they manage to stay alive (or rule universes) is beyond me, and it's nice to see other heroes acknowledging that.

I don't know that much about Martian Manhunter or Yuichiro since I totally missed out on the obligatory Sailor Moon obsession phase, so...

Detail:

You've got a lot of neat little things going on. Ranma finding Shampoo after being knocked clear across town, a paycheck from the Council of Oa, "Magical girl signatures?" etc.

I have a minor problem with the larger details - the origins, for one. This is probably because I already know the major heroes' beginnings, so it's tedious to see them again (and again and again and again). It's necessary for the younger readers, I'm sure. However, you handle them pretty well - short and sweet.

The fight scenes are alright. They're pretty short and to the point, but they do what they're supposed to.

Personally, I could do with more detail. In general. Descriptive-type things, really. There's a lot of good dialogue and some great banter, but I'd also like to *see* some heroes. You get across action just fine, mind you, but just a little mention of what they're going through while they're in action would be amazing. You don't have to dive into first-person to tell what a person is thinking or feeling, is what I guess I'm saying. A description of someone's expression, or a gesture, something to establish more involvement with the characters. So far you've got your characters acting for the audience, but not quite interacting. Does that make sense?

Conclusion:

Not bad. I like myself a crossover, every once in a while, and this one has amusing potential. It has a sound structure, and it can only improve from here. Consider the things I've said, is all I ask. Trust me, you're already a better writer than Christian Paolini, and *you* didn't have to steal your ideas from Star Wars.

I wish you the best of luck.

No more than ten chapters? Please be planning a sequel, dude...

All right, and looking forward to the enxt part, and what might happen when things go even more south, and how Keitaro will handle Brainiac, as well as what his plans are that involve Ryoko and what she plans to do, and how Washu might act when she finds out about this cool AI.

Great stuff as usual, you know Batwoman is going to get hers if she keeps running down the Scouts like that. I can see Jupiter getting fed up enough to take a poke at the Bat if she mouths off and is too close to Jupiter.

Well, Kitsune managed to acquit herself decently enough in her first outing as Green Lantern (loved the light construct Naru LOL), though I'm betting she's getting plenty frustrated as to why Supes isn't even batting an eye at her in that costume. The standard GL costume tends to be as you know a tad, erm "clingy" though I supposed Keitaro should be thankful Kitsune hasn't seen fit to try a variation of GL Arisa's costume.

My compliments...

Okay now I was *not* expecting either swerve (IE: Shampoo *not* being Wonder Woman and Yuichiro as The Martian Manhunter) jolly good show mate ;D

Can't wait to see what you cook up next ;)

Wow that's kinda unexpected. So Sakaki from Azumanga Daioh is Wonder Woman, Cologne and Shampoo (of Ranma1/2) and their kin are an offshoot of the Amazons from Paradise Island (where Wonder Woman came from), and to top it off Yuichiro is the Martian Manhunter (and apparently had a past with Sailor Mars, or rather her past life Senshi Mars from the time of the Moon Kingdom perhaps?). So who's the next superhero to show up?

Nice section, and here's hoping that Shampoo will finally get a dadgone clue and if not, then maybe she'll get it beaten into her for sure, and also look forward to more Keitaro and Mutsumi, and would be interesting to see what role Kitsune plays with things.

This is one of the most enjoyable works I have ever had the pleasure of reading on this site. Keep up the good work!

Awesome... I'm more and more interested in this fic as times goes... it's bloody addictive.

Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU! This was a frigging fantastic chapter, even if you sorta kinda gave Mitsumi a free pass over her handling of the whole Scouts encounter, seeing Kitsune dealing with the whole becoming a Green Lantern thing more than made up for that :D

I had another oath for Kitsune that came into my head when I realized you were giving her the ring:

"In brightest day, in blackest night,

No Sake shall escape my sight,

I'd much rather drink than fight,

So beware my power... Green Lantern's light"

...and she gets *paid*? Oh hell, she's got it made in the shade now. If she finds out what Keitaro is actually doing when getting punched out the windows, she'll hit the perfect trifecta of luck ;)

Neat! Can't wait for Green Fox to go out and kick some butt! Wonder hwo her sidekick might be, and what will happen if she meets Kei in his Superman persona? Looking forward to the next part.

You made Kitsune a Green Lantern.

You made Kitsune a Green Lantern.

You. Made. Kitsune. A. Green. LANTERN.

What the FRAK is wrong with you?