whoa. i really liked it. the sentences, the thoughts, all messed up, changing, scenes changing, like in movies - the start! how you described that - could picture it perfectly, could see it like a movie with the fast forward and speeding up and... really, really liked it.

You know what makes me sad, is that this brilliant story tells the truth. I look at The Mighty Boosh 1 to the 3rd one, theres such a big difference, and not a pleasant one at that. It's losing the love, their friendship is what made TMB so magical. It's lost the love, it's lost the magic. This story sums it up really. I know it's only a comedy in the end of the day, but i feel so emotionally attached to it. (i need to get out more i know) XD

This was well good: D

Thanks 4 thanking me but ur stuff is so good u didn't have 2 lol...: )

Wow indeed. I know I probably say this about everything you write, but that blew me away. It just...gahh!

The whole of the bit in the middle was amazingly put together. The progression from loving sweetie Vince to out-of-control partyboy Vince to spiteful little bitch Vince comes across so perfectly well. It's perfectly paced- gradual enough that it feels completely natural, and you get the sense of all the time that's passed between each segment, but not too slow, so it doesn't drag out. And using only dialogue works so well. It gives a sense of immediacy to the relationship, so it's like you're watching them interact, and by not explicitly describing the emotions you make them all seem more real and raw by letting the words they create speak for themselves. Itincreases the pace as well, which makes all the bits where they're arguing or Vince is being a bitch all the more intense. I absolutely adore the line "Cos I can’t do much without you"- it's such a sweet sentiment, and it fits perfectly with Vince's innocent personality in series 1. I love the way it complements the later part of that section as well, as Vince breaks away from Howard and starts on his downward spiral, and with the beginning, with Vince alone in the slum, having lost everything without Howard. It's a double-edged sword- it's so beautifully sweet on one side, and so tragic on another. That single-word paragraph "Silence" is wonderful too- it comes across so powerfully after all the arguments, and really gets across that sense of loss, and then the next bit follows on perfectly from that, the list really gets across all the tragedy and degradation Vince suffers without Howard.

Vince's monologuey bit was so poingnant and tragically beautiful. It made that transition from the selfish Vince of before to the pityingly selfless Vince so smooth and sad, and it made what wouldn't initially seem possible make perfect sense. And the way that Vince feels like he's let Howard down and leaves so that Howard will benefit but doesn't act like he feels this way or tell Howard about it really does seem like the natural extension to his character the way he develops through the series- that that admiration he had in series 1 hasn't really gone, he just ignored or forgot it, and later didn't feel he could legitimately bring it back. And this: “Haunting, slow, like a jazz funeral march for something that never quite lived" is one of the most beautiful phrases I have ever read. Especially considering that ever-unworthy sort of tragedy of Howard's character- it's like him in musical form, in a way.

And then, of course, the beginning and the end- they stunned me. The description of the rain and of Vince's body are so torturously detailed, they really get across the bleakness of his life alone and how badly he's been affected by it. The image of him there is so pathetic, it's harrowing. The thought of him feeling his own skeleton is quite creepy- it hammers home the fact that his life is so terrible there's a chance he might die, which is such a tragic, chilling thought. I love the idea of him wanting to become a foetus again too- it gets across his desire to go back to his old life and his childlike but primal need to be cared for so perfectly. And the metaphor of the film was used perfectly. There's an unreality about it, how he can't believe his life has come to this, and the bit at the end where it feels like it's slowed comes across like a hollow relief, a sort of return to the beginning of his tragic cycle, for the speeding up and the breakdown to happen all over again. That idea gets all this across so beautifully. And the pen too, just broke me. Him holding it shows just how much he loved Howard, and the contrast between the bleak life he's living and the love and friendship he had with Howard reminds you how much he's given up for him. And the last line before the ending lyrics, "He turns the corner" is so tragic becase of his simplicity. It's sort of like nothing's ended, he's just carrying on suffering in another place, and no one he needs will ever see, because he'll disappear before they can. It puts you into the position of the uncaring bystander, which is such an uncomfortable position to be in, so it really pushes in the extent of his misery and how little he has left.

This entire thing is beautiful. Your fics are always worth the two hours or hours or so it takes to write the review.

luv ya

x

Wow, I can't believe that I missed this before. That will teach me to never put anything on alerts...

I had to read it through quite a few times before I actually grasped what was going on... yeah, I'm slow, okay? After the first time, I had to go and look up the song because I didn't know it, and then I read it through again with the music playing on repeat in the background. And then I found the whole thing quite stunning.

I love the way that you used the flashbacks to kind of show how the relationship slowly deteriorated - I thought that was very effective. And the way you never really mentioned any names as well, it gave the whole piece a kind of anonymous, detatched feel that really suited the mood.

Thank you for this beautiful piece of writing. And for introducing me to such a wonderful song that I hadn't heard before. I always love discovering new music.

Love you

-C.V. x

Wow ]

I think you invented the word 'angst', you write it so well. That was really sweet, especially the bit about Vince looking up to Howard, and the thing about the stars.

Becky

xx

I know what that was - it was beautiful. Heartbreakingly so. You write the best angst, you really do, and that was so powerful and tragic. The flashbacks to happier times, and then when they started to darken and fall apart - it was all so poignant and upsetting.

And then he left. He just left! Because he cared about Howard too much, and that was the most tragic part of all. I'm probably being thick, but what was the pen for? I'm very intrigued! And probably a bit stupid for asking, but lack of sleep has left with with only basic brain functions, lol.

The song was gorgeous too. The words nearly made me cry! I must find it!

Love you!

xx

Awesome! Beautifully written, fantastic metaphors, and the bit with all the dialogue was fascinating. Is this a one shot, or will you carry it on? I'd love to see where it will go!

xoxo

Nina

Are you *trying* to destroy me with sadness? Lol. This is gorgeous, and really well written - not bad experimental at all. The present was so bleak and awful, like Vince's glow had disappeared and it had sucked all the life out of everything, and the flashbacks to the past were really touching. Particularly this:

“Oi! Anyway. If you didn’t come, I wouldn’t do it.”

“Why not?”

“Cos I can’t do much without you.”

*sigh* that is such a beautifully understated exchange, and I can really hear Vince saying those words. So anyway, this is great, and I am sad!

Wow, that's sad. I mean, really great, written perfectly. But really really sad. I'm going to go and read some fluff now to recover!

wow, this was so sad, yet full of emotions, i loved it

Wow. This was just so sad and beautiful.

I loved the flashbacks, the way they started off all happy and then gradually became more ugly and upseting.

And then Vince with the pen - so sad!

xx

Wow, you may not know what that was but I do.

That was beyond beautiful, it really was. I just adored every single word, the song was perfect and added to the mood.

The fact you use no names stands out to me and it seems so powerful, and because you didn't use any I'd automatically assume it would be hard to tell who is speaking but by the way you wrote it I perfectly understood who said what and who did what.

Brilliant job! :D

Omg! wow.

I love the flash backs, the way they go through from when they where happy to when they wern't, I love the format you adopted, it worked really well.

whats the song? or did you write it yourself?

But yeah! :( sad.

Great work hunni

Love you!

x

first off, before i start my lovely review, i need to tell you off... you should be updating the other ones, but on the other hand. I F*G LOVED IT!